No More Learning

The Peloponnesian War, the devastating conflict between Athens and Sparta and their allies, eventually resulting in the occupation and partial destruction of Athens by Sparta.
Sophocles's tragic play Oedipus the King, perhaps the best known and most often revived ancient Greek play, is presented in Athens for the first time.
The death of Pericles, who had contracted the highly contagious and nearly always fatal plague that had swept through Athens in this year and in the previous year.
The ostracism of Hyperbolus, the last known victim of the Athenian practice that enabled the citizens of Athens to exile, via popular vote, a disliked or unscrupulous politician for 10 years. Ostracism votes were outlawed after this year.
The disastrous Sicilian Expedition, in which the Athenians inexplicably try to invade the faraway island of Sicily, in the midst of the Peloponnesian War, and are thoroughly defeated.
The famous playwrights Euripides and Sophocles both die in this year.
The famous Athenian philosopher Socrates is put on trial for impiety and subversion. He is convicted and forced to commit suicide.
The philosopher Aristotle and the orator/lawyer Demosthenes are both born in this year. Ironically, they also both died in the same year, 322.
Battle of Leuctra, between Thebes and Sparta. The Thebans win and thereby end Spartan dominance over Greece, which the Spartans had established after the Peloponnesian War.
Battle of Chaeronea, in which the forces of King Philip of Macedonia defeat the Athenians and Thebans. The nearby town of Chaeronea was the birthplace of Plutarch.
The assassination of King Philip of Macedonia. The Athenian orator Demosthenes attacked King Philip and his policies in three of his most famous speeches, the Philippics (352; 344; 341).
The rule of King Philip's son, Alexander the Great.
331 330 Ca. 280 279
211
146
The founding of the city of Alexandria in Egypt by Alexander the Great, who named it after himself.
The venerable and famous capital city of the Persians, Persepolis, is cap- tured, vandalized, and set ablaze by Alexander the Great and his soldiers.
Completion of the Pharos, the huge 300-foot-tall lighthouse at Alexandria, deemed one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World.
Battle of Asculum, in which the Greek mercenary general Pyrrhus is victorious against the Romans but loses some of his best soldiers in the process. The outcome of that battle occasioned his famous state- ment that one more success like that would ruin him; hence, the phrase "Pyrrhic victory. "
Death of the mathematician and physicist Archimedes in Syracuse. He once said that, given a place to stand and a pole long enough, he could move the world.
Subjugation of Corinth by the Romans, the last Greek city to hold out against the inevitable. The Romans annex Greece and turn it into a province called Achaea.
CHRONOLOGY OF ROMAN HISTORY FROM THE FOUNDING OF THE CITY TO THE EDICT OF DIOCLETIAN, 753 BCE-301 CE
BCE Events
753 Romulus founds the city of Rome, and becomes its first king.
753-509 Rome is ruled by a succession of seven kings: Romulus (753-714)
Numa Pompilius (714-671) Tullus Hostilius (671-642) Ancus Martius (642-617) Tarquinius Priscus (617-579) Servius Tullius (579-535) Tarquinius Superbus (535-509)
509 Tarquinius Superbus is removed from power, and with him, the mon- archy. The Roman Republic is founded.
509-27 The span of the Roman Republic, when Rome is governed by elected officials and legislative bodies.
458 The Roman farmer-turned-military dictator Lucius Quinctius Cincinnatus is called to duty to extricate a blockaded Roman army. He
Chronology
? ? xxiii
Chronology
xxiv
Ca. 450 396
366
366
343-341
287
264-241 247 218-201
216
202
184
answers the call, saves the army, and resigns his dictatorship, all within the space of 16 days.
The Twelve Tables are promulgated, the first codification of Roman law.
The general Marcus Furius Camillus captures the important Italian town of Veii, signaling the fact that Rome is becoming a regional power to be reckoned with.
Lucius Sextius is elected consul, the highest political office. He is the first plebeian to hold the office, which had formerly been exclusively reserved for patrician politicians.
The passage of the laws of Licinius and Sextius, which specified, among other things, that no individual could hold more than 300 acres of public pasture land.
The First Samnite War. The Samnites were a warlike people in south- central Italy, against whom the Romans fought this war and two others: the Second Samnite War (328-304) and the Third Samnite War (298-290).
The fifth secession (a massive withdrawal from the city) of the plebeians, a tactic they used against the ruling patrician class in order to gain politi- cal equality. Four previous secessions are thought to have occurred, in 494, 449, 445, and 342, although the consensus appears to be that only the fifth, in 287, is beyond question a historical fact.
The First Punic War. The Romans win and impose an extremely harsh peace treaty on their defeated enemy, the Carthaginians.
Birth of Hannibal, the intractable Carthaginian leader and implacable enemy of Rome.
The Second Punic War, between Rome and Carthage. The Carthaginians are led by Hannibal, who almost succeeds in capturing the city and destroying the Roman Republic.
The Battle of Cannae, near the Adriatic coast of Italy. The Carthaginians virtually annihilate a 60,000-man Roman army. Future Romans will look back upon this battle as one of their worst military defeats ever.
The decisive Battle of Zama, the only time in the Second Punic War that the Romans defeat the Carthaginians in a major battle. Ironically, the battle occurs not in Italy but in North Africa, not far from the city of Carthage. The Second Punic War officially ends in the next year.
Marcus Porcius Cato (Cato the Elder), one of the most famous--and cantankerous--politicians in Roman history, holds the office of censor, in which he initiates a number of unpopular reforms, including crack- downs on citizens who stole water from the aqueducts, the imposition of significantly higher taxes on luxury goods, and higher rental rates for public lands.
149-146 The Third (and final) Punic War, in which Rome utterly and totally defeats and destroys Carthage.
135-132 A major slave revolt breaks out in Sicily.
133 King Attalus III of Pergamum dies, having willed his entire kingdom to the Roman people. Pergamum subsequently becomes Rome's
first Asian province.
133 Tiberius Sempronius Gracchus takes office as one of the 10 tribunes for the year. He proposes and wins enactment of some highly controversial land reform measures, including the enforcement of the law of Licinius
and Sextius (in 366, above).
133 Some 300 people, including Gracchus, are killed in a riot that breaks out during a political rally. Plutarch states that this was reportedly the first time ever in Roman history in which a civil disturbance resulted in the
death of Roman citizens.
123 The tribunate of Gaius Sempronius Gracchus, the brother of Tiberius (above). Gaius has a legislative program as ambitious and as controversial
as his brother's, and he meets the same fate.
106 The birth of the famous orator/lawyer/statesman Cicero.
100 The birth of Julius Caesar.
90-88 The Italian Social War, a struggle pitting Rome against its Italian allies, who wanted Roman citizenship with its concomitant rights and
freedoms.
73 The Thracian slave Spartacus foments a slave rebellion in southern Italy.
70 Cicero successfully argues his first high-profile court case, a prosecution of the corrupt ex-governor of Sicily, Gaius Verres.
63 The year of Cicero's consulship.
63 The disappointed office seeker Lucius Sergius Catilina ("Catiline") organizes an armed conspiracy whose aim is to overthrow the Roman government by force. Cicero discovers the plan and exposes it in a series
of four famous speeches, in November and December of this year. 59 The year of Julius Caesar's consulship.
58-50 Julius Caesar's governorship in Gaul, unprecedented in terms of its length; most provincial governorships lasted for one or two years, three
at most.
50 Caesar is recalled to Rome by nervous politicians. They want to inter- rogate him about his actions in Gaul and his plans for the future.
49 In one of the most famous episodes in Roman history, Caesar, uttering his memorable words "The die is cast," crosses the Rubicon River in northern Italy with his army intact. This action precipitates a civil
war.
Chronology
xxv
Chronology
xxvi
49-45
44
44
44-31
44-43
43 31
29-19 27
27 BCE-476 CE
A period of civil war following Caesar's crossing of the Rubicon River. Caesar's side eventually prevails. The Battle of Munda in Spain, in 45, is the final and decisive battle of the civil war.
Caesar receives a lifetime dictatorship, the latest in a whole series of nontraditional offices and powers he obtains in the decade of the 40s, up until the Ides of March (see next entry).
The Ides of March conspiracy (March 15) unfolds. The goal of the 60 conspirators: to assassinate Caesar, in hopes of somehow restoring the Roman Republic by his death. Their goal of killing Caesar is fulfilled. Their hope of restoring the Republic is not.
Another bloody civil war. Shortly before his assassination, Caesar had predicted that should anything happen to him, a second civil war would break out, worse than the one fought from 49 to 45. He was correct.
Cicero delivers his Philippics, the final public speeches of his long and dis- tinguished career. There were 14 of them altogether; most were harsh denunciations of one of Cicero's arch-enemies, Mark Antony.
Cicero is hunted down and murdered at the behest of Mark Antony.
The Battle of Actium, the last battle of the civil war. The forces of Octavianus (later Augustus) prevail over those commanded by Mark Antony.
The Roman poet Virgil spends these 10 years writing the Aeneid, the renowned epic poem celebrating the founding of the Roman race.
Octavianus receives two perquisites from the Roman Senate that ensure the end of the Republic and the beginning of the Roman Empire: (1) He is granted lifetime tribunician powers, meaning, in effect, that he personally can override and nullify the decisions made by any other legislative entity, or the proposals of any individual politician. (2) The honorary title Augustus, "the revered one," a word that has divine connotations.
The span of the western Roman Empire.
CE Events
14 The death of Augustus. His reign as emperor lasts over 40 years.
14-68 The reigns of the Julio-Claudian successors of Augustus. Tiberius (14-37)
Caligula (37-41) Claudius (41-54) Nero (54-68)
17 64
69-96
79 80
96-180
97
122
Ca. 212
247 271
284-305 293
301
Two notable literati die in this year: the poet Ovid and the historian Livy.
A terrible fire sweeps through Rome, during which Nero supposedly "fiddles"
as the city goes up in flames. The story of his fiddling is probably apocryphal. The reigns of the Flavian emperors:
Vespasian (69-79) Titus (79-81) Domitian (81-96)
Mount Vesuvius erupts in the summer of 79, burying the cities of Pompeii and Herculaneum, as well as many farms and smaller towns, in volcanic debris.
The Flavian Amphitheater, better known as the Coliseum, is dedicated. The reigns of the so-called Five Good Emperors:
Nerva (96-98)
Trajan (98-117)
Hadrian (117-138) Antoninus Pius (138-161) Marcus Aurelius (161-180)
Frontinus becomes curator aquarum, the official in charge of Rome's magnifi- cent aqueduct system. He later writes a detailed technical manual on the aque- ducts, De Aquis Urbis Romae ("On the Aqueducts of Rome"), the only book of its kind surviving from antiquity.
Work begins on Hadrian's Wall in northern England to obstruct raids from tribes living north of the wall. It eventually extends for about 80 miles and to a height of around 20 feet.
Construction begins on the Baths of Caracalla. These public baths were huge; the main building measured 750 feet by 380 feet. Built at the order of the emperor Caracalla (reigned 211-217), for whom they were named.
Observances are held in Rome to mark 1,000 years of Roman civilization.
Construction begins on the Aurelian Wall, extending for 12 miles around Rome and reaching a height of 60 feet.
The reign of the emperor Diocletian.
The emperor Diocletian establishes a tetrarchy, in which four men would jointly rule the empire.
Publication of the Edict of Diocletian.
Chronology
xxvii
This page intentionally left blank
DOMESTIC LIFE
This page intentionally left blank
1. GROWING UP IN SPARTA WAS NO PICNIC
INTRODUCTION
Life in ancient Sparta undoubtedly differed quite markedly from life in the other Greek polises, as the biographer and essayist Plutarch informs us.
KEEP IN MIND AS YOU READ
1. Plutarch's essay The Ancient Customs of the Spartans, from which the document has been excerpted, is comprised of an annotated list of 42 aspects of Spartan life. Plutarch describes each of the 42 in varying degrees of detail. Some, like the first one, consist of only one sentence: "To each of those who comes in to the public meals, the eldest man says, as he points to the doors, 'Through these no word goes out' " (eerily reminiscent of the code of many modern sports teams: "What is said in the locker room, stays in the locker room. "). Others are lengthier, but none is longer than several hundred words.
2. Plutarch also wrote an essay entitled Sayings of Spartans, which is considerably longer than his essay on the customs of the Spartans but contains many of the short, pithy statements for which the Spartans were famous. He also authored a (much shorter) work called Sayings of Spartan Women.
3. Many of the Spartan customs that Plutarch describes were reportedly initiated or encouraged by the legendary Spartan king Lycurgus, whose dates and even historical authenticity are debated by modern historians. Plutarch wrote a biography of Lycurgus.
Document: Plutarch on Life in Sparta
They learned to read and write for purely practical reasons. But all other forms of education they banned from the country . . . All their education was directed toward prompt obedience to authority, stout endurance of hardship, and victory or death in battle.
? ? ? ? ? 3
Voices of Ancient Greece and Rome
They always went without a shirt, receiving one garment for the entire year, and with unwashed bodies, refraining almost completely from bathing and rubbing down. . .
It was the custom that the younger men should be questioned by the elder as to where they were going and for what, and also that the elder should rebuke the one who did not answer or tried to contrive plausible reasons. And the elder who did not rebuke a younger who did wrong in his presence was liable to the same reprimand as the wrongdoer. And anyone who showed resentment, if he was reprimanded, [found himself in serious trouble] . . .
Moreover, the young men were required not only to respect their own fathers and to be obedient to them, but to have regard for all the older men, to make room for them on the streets, to give up their seats to them, and to keep quiet in their presence. As the result of this custom each man had authority, not as in other states over his own chil- dren, slaves, and property, but also over his neighbor's in like manner as over his own, to the end that the people should, as much as possible, have all things in common, and should take thought for them as for their own . . .
The boys steal whatever they can of their food, learn- ing to make their raids adroitly upon people who are asleep or are careless in watching. The penalty for getting caught is a beating and no food. For the dinner allowed them is meager, so that, through coping with want by their own initiative, they may be compelled to be daring and unscrupulous . . .
The selling of anything was not permitted, but it was their custom to use the neighbors' servants as their own if they needed them and also their dogs and horses, unless the owners required them for their own use. And in the country, if anyone found himself lacking anything and had need of it, he would open an owner's storehouse and take away enough to meet his need, and then replace the seals and leave it . . .
They used to make the Helots [state-owned slaves] drunk and exhibit them to the young as a deterrent from excessive drinking.
It was their custom not to knock on the outer doors, but to call from outside . . .
They did not attend either comedy or tragedy [i. e. , theatrical productions], so that they might not hear anyone speak either in earnest or in jest against the laws.
They reprimanded [a] young man from the gymnasium because he knew well about the road to Pylaea.
One of the noble and blessed privileges that Lycurgus appears to have secured for his fellow citizens was
? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? a beating: Young thieves caught in the act were beaten not because stealing was considered wrong or immoral, but because they were insufficiently stealthy to avoid capture.
give up their seats: Most likely at pub- lic events such as religious festivals or athletic competitions.
gymnasium: A large, open-air public building found in most Greek towns, primarily for the use of athletes. However, philosophical discussions and lectures could also take place in gymnasia. The sacred groves near Athens, where Plato famously taught, was called the Academia (hence our word "aca- demic"), and a gymnasium was eventually constructed on the site. But even in Plato's day, the area was apparently frequented by athletes in training.
Pylaea: This word has an interesting history. It is related to the word for "gate," and it originally referred to meeting places, near gated areas of a city's walls, for the represen- tatives of various leagues and coun- cils. Not surprisingly, whenever large numbers of people congre- gated, the informal topics of con- versation often drifted into the realm of the mundane and even the gossipy. Hence, the word came to be associated with trivial conver- sation, which is what it seems to imply in this context: the young man on "the road to Pylaea" appa- rently referred to his propensity for unfocused conversation, when he should have been concentrating on gymnastic drills and exercises.
without a shirt: Plutarch does not mean they went about unclothed from the waist up, but that they wore no shirt underneath their cloak, the himation, here translated as "garment. "
? ? ? 4
abundance of leisure.
In fact it was not permitted them to take up any menial trade at all, and there was no need whatever of making money, which involves a toilsome accumulation, nor of busy activity, because of his having made wealth wholly unenvied and unhonored. The Helots tilled the soil for them, paying a return that was regularly settled in advance. There was a ban against letting for a higher price, so that the Helots might make some profit, and thus be glad to do the work for their masters . . . [Tr. Frank Cole Babbitt. Plutarch's Moralia (237-239). Volume III. LCL, 1931. Page numbers: 429, 431, 439, 441, 443, 445. ]
AFTERMATH
Plutarch was writing in a time (first/second centuries CE) when the Romans had long since subjugated Greece and most of the rest of the Mediterranean world. In his last chapter in "Ancient Customs of the Spartans," he argues that the Spartans remained strong and in- dependent as long as they followed the precepts and laws of Lycurgus, but once they began to neglect those ordinances, "they became much like the rest [of those under Roman rule], and put from them their former glory and freedom of speech, and were reduced to a state of subjection. And now they, like the rest of the Greeks, have come under Roman sway. "
ASK YOURSELF
1. What do you think of the Spartan attitude toward education? Why do you suppose the Spartans "banned from the country" all forms of education except for purely practical forms of reading and writing?
2. What are some of the Spartan customs regarding children and adults, and their interactions and relationships? What are the advantages and disadvantages of these customs?
Growing Up in Sparta Was No Picnic
? ? ? ? ARISTOTLE'S COMMENT ON COMMUNITY PROPERTY
One of the many works of the famous fourth-century BCE philosopher Aristotle is entitled Politics. In this lengthy treatise, he covers a number of important topics, including the nature of the state; the family; slavery; the origin of money; the various kinds of governments and constitutions, including those of Sparta, Crete, and Carthage; citizenship; revolutions; the best kind of state; and the nature and importance of education. On the matter of property held in common, he writes: "Even now there are some states in which the outlines of such a scheme [of commonly-held property] are so far apparent, as to suggest that it is not impossible; in well-ordered states . . . there are some elements of it already existing . . . In these states, each citizen has his own property, but when it comes to the use of this property, each makes a part of it available to his friends, and each devotes still another part to the common enjoyment of all fellow citizens. In Sparta, for example, men use one another's slaves, and one another's horses and dogs, as if they were their own. And they take provisions on a journey, if they happen to be in need, from the farms in the countryside belonging to other citizens. " Aristotle. Politics 2. 5; tr. Barker.
? ? ? ? ? ? 5
Voices of Ancient Greece and Rome
3. What is your opinion of the custom that "boys steal whatever they can of their food"? What do you think of the stated rationale for this behavior, namely, that it teaches them to be "daring and unscrupulous"?
4. Why do you suppose the Spartans were not allowed to sell anything? How would this prohibition fit in with other Spartan customs mentioned in the document? And what about the idea that "there was no need whatever of making money"? Is this practical?
TOPICS TO CONSIDER
e A good deal of the information that Plutarch incorporates into this docu- ment is also recorded in his biography of Lycurgus. Read over that biogra- phy, and then compare it to "Ancient Customs of the Spartans. " What similarities or differences do you notice?
e Can you think of any contemporary societies or countries that have cus- toms similar to those of the Spartans? Explain the similarities. Some histor- ians argue that Spartan society, and especially its share-the-wealth ethic, is similar to modern socialist societies or countries. Do you think that this is an accurate comparison?
e Plutarch has very little to say in this essay about Spartan girls or women. Why not, do you suppose? Access one of the many websites on the topic for additional information. (Interestingly, Plutarch did write an essay enti- tled Bravery of Women, and another one called Sayings of Spartan Women, so he certainly was not averse to including information about women in his writings. )
e WhatisyouropinionofthedescriptionsinbothPlutarchandAristotleof the Spartan custom of commonly held property? Do you think that this system worked in actual practice? Would such a system be viable today?
Further Information
Cartledge, Paul. Spartan Reflections. London, 2001.
Forrest, W. G. A History of Sparta, 950-192 B. C. New York, 1968.
Pomeroy, Sarah B. Spartan Women. Oxford, 2002.
Pomeroy, Sarah B. , Stanley M. Burstein, and Jennifer Tolbert Roberts. Ancient Greece: A
Political, Social, and Cultural History (Chapter 4: Sparta). New York, 1999. Bibliography for Document
Babbitt, Frank Cole (tr. ). Plutarch's Moralia. Volume III. [LCL. ] London and New York, 1931.
Barker, Ernest (tr. ). The Politics of Aristotle. Oxford, 1958.
? ? 6
2. A FAILURE TO LAUNCH, IN AN ATHENIAN FAMILY
INTRODUCTION
Aristophanes, author of the document that follows, enjoyed a long and successful career as an Athenian comic playwright, in the late fifth and early fourth centuries BCE. His play Clouds, one of his earlier efforts, was staged around 423.
KEEP IN MIND AS YOU READ
1. Aristophanes, like all the comic playwrights of his time, injected heavy doses of sat- ire into his plays, so that fact must always be kept in mind when reading or inter- preting his works. Nevertheless, even satire must be based on a foundation of truth, so there is clearly historical value in satirical writings.
2. The document is excerpted from the opening scenes of Aristophanes's play, in which an old Athenian man by the name of Strepsiades is lying in bed, tossing and turning and unable to sleep, because his spendthrift son, Phidippides, has wasted large sums of the family's money on chariot racing. The resulting indebtedness is becoming Strepsiades's problem, and he does not see how he will possibly be able to satisfy the family's growing list of creditors. The scene is thus set for a generational confron- tation between father and son: the father extols the virtues of thrift and hard work, whereas the son finds nothing wrong with having a good time--an expensively good time--down at the racetrack.
3. As in many Aristophanic comedies, the names of the principal characters are con- coctions of the playwright's imagination, and as such, they can often be translated. The name "Strepsiades" is related to the Greek word strepho, meaning "twist," or "turn," a word that is aptly descriptive of the old man's nocturnal woes. The son's name, Phidippides, is formed from a combination of the words pheido, "thrift," and hippos, "horse. " The hippos suffix also conveys a connotation of wealth, since only well-to-do individuals could afford to own and maintain horses. And the name is only one letter away from the word "Philippides," which would mean "lover of horses," also a fitting moniker for the son.
4. The "city life versus country life" theme is raised in one of Strepsiades's early speeches, where he laments having married a city woman who knew nothing of the simple pleasures of country living that Strepsiades had enjoyed before their union.
? ? ? ? 7
Voices of Ancient Greece and Rome
? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Amynias: Apparently a kind of a low- life character, who appeared in Aristophanes's play Wasps, as well as in plays by other contemporary writers.
bailiff: The Greek word demarchos, or demarch, here translated as "bail- iff," was literally the chief officer of an Athenian deme, or adminis- trative district. According to K. J. Dover, the demarch "had the custody of the official list of members of the deme. . . he was responsible for exacting the rents on land leased by the deme to indi- viduals . . . and it is a fair inference from this passage that he had the authority to enforce the surrender of securities by a debtor to a private creditor. "
Coesyrized: A reference to the mother of Megacles, Coisyra, who was apparently a typically arrogant member of the upper classes of sophisticated Athenian society.
Colias and Genetyllis: According to Jeffrey Henderson, "Colias was the name of an Attic promontory where women held festivals for Aphrodite and the Genetyllides, goddesses of procreation. "
hack: Koppatian, a kind of horse branded with the Greek letter koppa.
the moon in her twenties: More than 20 days into the month, with bills due and payable at the end of the month.
oil: Lamps were fueled by olive oil. Pasias: Otherwise unknown. This might be one of Aristophanes's invented names. There was a remarkably successful Athenian banker named Pasio (d. 370 BCE), but it seems unlikely that there is any connection between him and
the Pasias mentioned in the play.
? ? ? 8
Document: A Father-Son
Heart-to-Heart
(Strepsiades and Phidippides lie sleeping. Strepsiades sits up restlessly. )
STREPSIADES:
Oh dear, oh dear! Lord Zeus, what a stretch of nighttime! Interminable. Will it never be day? I did hear a rooster crow quite a while back, but the slaves are snoring. They wouldn't in the old days. Damn you, War, for my many worries, when I can't even punish my slaves! And this fine young man here won't rouse himself before daybreak either, but farts away wrapped up in five woolen coverlets. All right, then, let's all get under the covers and snore! No use, I can't get to sleep, poor soul. I'm being eaten alive by my bills and stable fees and debts, on account of this son of mine. He wears his hair long and rides horses and races chariots, and he even dreams about horses, while I go to pieces as I watch the moon in her twenties, because my interest payment looms just ahead. [Addressing a slave:] Boy! Light a lamp, and bring me my ledger book, so
I can count my creditors and reckon the interest. Let's see, what do I owe? Twelve minas to Pasias? What were the twelve minas to Pasias for? What did I use it for? When I bought that branded hack. Oh me, oh my! I wish I'd had my eye knocked out with a stone . . . But what arrears overtook me after Pasias? Three minas to Amynias for a small seat and a pair of wheels. . .
Really, father, why do you grouse and toss all night long?
There's a bailiff in the bedclothes biting me. For heaven's sake, let me catch a little sleep. All right then, sleep! But bear in mind, all these debts will end up on your head. Ah, I wish she'd died a terrible death, that matchmaker who talked me into marrying your mother! Mine was a very pleasant country life, moldy, unswept, aimlessly leisured, abounding in honey
PHIDIPPIDES (awakening): STREPSIADES: PHIDIPPIDES: STREPSIADES:
bees, sheep, and olive cakes. Then
I married the niece of Megacles, son of Megacles, I a rustic, she from town, haughty, spoiled, thoroughly Coesyrized. When I married her
I climbed into bed smelling of new wine, figs, fleeces, and abundance; and she of perfume, saffron, tongue kisses, extravagance, gluttony, Colias and Genetyllis. But still, I won't say she was lazy; she used plenty of thread when she wove. I used to show her this cloak of mine as proof and say, "Woman, you go too heavy on the thread! "
SLAVE: We've got no oil in the lamp. STREPSIADES: Damn it, why did you light me the thirsty
lamp? Come here and take your beating. SLAVE: Why should I get a beating, then?
STREPSIADES: Because you put in one of the thick wicks! The slave runs inside. After that,
when this son was born to us, I mean to me and my high-class wife, we started to bicker over his name. She was for adding hippos ["horse," connoting elevated social status] to the name, Xanthippus or Chaerrippus or Callippides, while I was for calling him Phidonides after his grandfather. So for a while we argued, until finally we compromised and called him Phidippides. She used to pick up this boy and coo at him, "When you're grown you'll drive a chariot to the Acropolis, like Megacles, and don a saf- fron robe. " And I would say, "No, you'll drive the goats from the Rocky Bottom, like your father, and wear a leather jacket.