Go thither, ye who fancy a
barbarian
harlot with embroidered turban.
Satires
No minstrel here may make her cornet sound!
Such were the orgies
by the secret torch-light which the Baptæ celebrated, who used to
weary out even the Athenian Cotytto. [91] One with needle held oblique
adds length to his eyebrows touched with moistened soot, and raising
the lids paints his quivering eyes. Another drains a Priapus-shaped
glass, and confines his long thick hair with a caul of gold thread,
clothed in sky-blue checks, or close-piled yellow stuffs; while his
attendant also swears by Juno, the patron deity of his master. Another
holds a mirror, the weapon wielded by the pathic Otho, "the spoil of
Auruncan Actor,"[92] in which he surveyed himself when fully armed,
before he gave the signal to engage--a thing worthy to be recorded in
the latest annals and history of the day. A mirror! fit baggage for
a civil war! O yes, forsooth! to kill old Galba shows the consummate
general, to pamper one's complexion is the consistent occupation of
the first citizen of Rome; to aspire to the empire as the prize on
Bebriacum's[93] plains, and then spread over his face a poultice
applied with his fingers! Such an act as neither the quivered Semiramis
perpetrated in the Assyrian realms, or Cleopatra flying dejected in her
Actian galley. Among this crew there is neither decency of language,
nor respect for the proprieties of the table. Here is the foul license
that Cybele enjoins, the lisping speech, the aged priest with hoary
hair, like one possessed, a prodigy of boundless appetite, open to
hire. Yet why do they delay? since long ago they ought after the
Phrygian custom to have removed with their knives the superfluous flesh.
Gracchus[94] gave four hundred sestertia as his dowry, with himself,
to a bugler, or else one that blew the straight trumpet. The marriage
deeds were duly signed, the blessing invoked, a great dinner provided,
the he-bride lay in the bridegroom's arms. O nobles! is it a censor
we need, or an aruspex? You would without doubt be horrified, and deem
it a prodigy of portentous import, if a woman gave birth to a calf, or
a cow to a lamb. The same Gracchus puts on flounces, the long robe and
flame-colored[95] veil, who, when bearing the sacred shields swinging
with mysterious thong, sweated beneath the Ancilia! Oh! father of
our city! whence came such heinous guilt to the shepherds of Latium?
Whence, O Gradivus, came this unnatural lust that has tainted thy race?
See! a man illustrious in birth and rank is made over to a man! Dost
thou neither shake thy helmet, nor smite the earth with thy lance? Dost
thou not even appeal to thy father Jove? Begone then! and quit the
acres of the Campus once so severe, which thou ceasest to care for!
"I have some duty-work to perform to-morrow at break of day in the
Quirinal valley. " "What is the occasion? " "Why ask? my friend is going
to be married; only a few are invited! " If we only live to see it,
these things will be done in the broad light of day, and claim to be
registered in the public acts. Meanwhile, there is one grievous source
of pain that clings to these male-brides, that they are incapable
of bearing, and retaining their lords' affections by bringing them
children. No! better is it that nature in this case gives their minds
no power over their bodies! They must die barren! Vain, in their case,
is fat Lyde with her medicated box; vain the holding out their hands to
the nimble Luperci.
Yet even this prodigy of crime is surpassed by the trident of Gracchus
in his gladiator's tunic,[96] when in full flight he traverses the
middle of the arena. Gracchus! more nobly born than the Manlii, and
Marcelli, and Catulus' and Paulus' race, and the Fabii, and all the
spectators in the front row. Ay, even though you add to these the very
man himself, at whose expense he cast his net as Retiarius.
That there are departed spirits, and realms beneath the earth--that
Charon's pole exists, and the foul frogs in the Stygian whirlpool--and
that so many thousand souls cross its waters in a single bark, not
even boys believe, save those as yet too young to be charged for their
bath. [97] But do thou believe them true! What does Curius feel, and
the two Scipios, what Fabricius and the shades of Camillus, what the
legion cut off at Cremera, and the flower of Roman youth slaughtered
at Cannæ--so many martial spirits--what do they feel when such a shade
as this passes from us to them? They would long to be cleansed from
the pollution of the contact, could any sulphur and pine-torches be
supplied to them, or could there be a bay-tree to sprinkle them with
water.
To such a pitch of degradation are we come! [98] We have, indeed,
advanced our arms beyond Juverna's shore, and the Orcades[99] recently
subdued, and the Britons content with night contracted to its briefest
span. But those abominations which are committed in the victorious
people's city are unknown to those barbarians whom we have conquered.
"Yet there _is_ a story told of one, an Armenian Zalates, who, more
effeminate than the rest of his young countrymen, is reported to have
yielded to the tribune's lust. " See the result of intercourse with
Rome! He came a hostage! Here they learn to be _men_! For if a longer
tarry in the city be granted to these youths, they will never lack a
lover. Their plaids, and knives, and bits, and whips, will soon be
discarded. Thus it is the vices of our young nobles are aped even at
Artaxata. [100]
FOOTNOTES:
[83] Alluding to the comic exclamation, "O Cœlum, O Terra, O Maria
Neptuni. " Vid. Ter. , Adelph. , v. , i. , 4. Cf. Sat. vi. , 283.
[84] _Nuper. _ The allusion is to Domitian and his niece Julia, who died
from the use of abortives (cf. Plin. , iv. , Epist. xi. : "Vidua abortu
periit"), cir. A. D. 91. This, therefore, fixes the date of the Satire,
which was probably one of Juvenal's earliest, and written when he was
about thirty. Cf. Sat. xiii. , 17.
[85] Cf. vi. , 368.
[86] _Vexantur. _ E somno excitantur, alluding to "Lex Julia Dormis? "
Cf. i. , 126.
[87] The whole of this ironical defense contains the bitterest satire
upon the women of Rome, as all these crimes he proves in the 6th Satire
to be of every-day occurrence.
[88] _Puellæ. _ Cf. Sat. ix. , 70, _seq. _
[89] _Cylindros_, called, vi. , 459, "Elenchos. " Cf. Arist. , Fr. , 300,
ἑλικτῆρες.
[90] _Nudus_, i. e. , in the Roman sense, without the toga.
[91] _Cotytto_ herself, the goddess of licentiousness, was wearied with
their impurities.
[92] _Actoris. _ Æn. , xii. , 94.
[93] _Bebriacum_, between Verona and Cremona, where the deciding battle
was fought between Otho and Vitellius.
[94] _Gracchus. _ In the same manner Nero was married to one Pythagoras,
"in modum solennium conjugiorum denupsisset. " Tac. , Ann. , xv. , 37. He
repeated the same act with Sporus.
[95] _Flammea. _ Vid. Tac. , u. s. "Inditum imperatori flammeum, visi
auspices, dos, et genialis torus et faces nuptiales: cuncta denique
spectata, quæ etiam in feminâ nox operit. "
[96] _Tunicati. _ Vid. Sat. vi. , 256; viii. , 203. Movet ecce tridentem.
Credamus tunicæ, etc.
[97] _Nondum ære lavantur. _ The fee was a quadrans: vi. , 447.
[98] _Traducimur. _ Cf. viii. , 17. Squalentes traducit avos.
[99] _Modo captas Orcadas. _ A. D. 78, Clinton, F. R. "Insulas quas
Orcadas vocant, invenit domuitque. " Tac. , Agric. , c. x. ; cf. c.
xii. "Dierum spatia ultra nostri orbis mensuram: _nox_ clara, et
extremâ Britanniæ parte _brevis_, ut finem atque initium lucis exiguo
discrimine internoscas. "
[100] _Referunt. _ Cf. i. , 41. "Multum _referens_ de Mæcenate supino. "
The fashion is not only _carried_ back to Armenia, but _copied_ there.
_Prætextatus. _ Cf. i. , 78. _Artaxata_, the capital of Armenia, was
taken by Corbulo, A. D. 58.
SATIRE III.
Although troubled at the departure of my old friend, yet I can not but
commend his intention of fixing his abode at Cumæ, now desolate, and
giving the Sibyl one citizen at least. It is the high road to Baiæ, and
has a pleasant shore; a delightful retreat. I prefer even Prochyta[101]
to the Suburra. For what have we ever looked on so wretched or so
lonely, that you would not deem it worse to be in constant dread of
fires, the perpetual falling-in of houses, and the thousand dangers of
the cruel city,[102] and poets spouting in the month of August. [103]
But while his whole household is being stowed in a single wagon, my
friend Umbritius halted at the ancient triumphal arches[104] and the
moist Capena. Here, where Numa used to make assignations with his
nocturnal mistress, the grove of the once-hallowed fountain and the
temples are in our days let out to Jews, whose whole furniture is a
basket and bundle of hay. [105] For every single tree is bid to pay a
rent to the people, and the Camenæ having been ejected, the wood is
one mass of beggars. We descended into the valley of Egeria and the
grottoes, so altered from what nature made them. How much more should
we feel the influence of the presiding genius of the spring,[106]
if turf inclosed the waters with its margin of green, and no marble
profaned the native tufo. Here then Umbritius began:[107]
"Since at Rome there is no place for honest pursuits, no profit to be
got by honest toil--my fortune is less to-day than it was yesterday,
and to-morrow must again make that little less--we purpose emigrating
to the spot where Dædalus put off his wearied wings, while my gray
hairs are still but few, my old age green and erect; while something
yet remains for Lachesis to spin, and I can bear myself on my own legs,
without a staff to support my right hand. Let us leave our native land.
There let Arturius and Catulus live. Let those continue in it who turn
black to white; for whom it is an easy matter to get contracts for
building temples, clearing rivers, constructing harbors,[108] cleansing
the sewers, the furnishing a funeral,[109] and under the mistress-spear
set up the slave to sale. "[110]
These fellows, who in former days were horn-blowers, and constant
attendants on the municipal amphitheatres, and whose puffed cheeks were
well known through all the towns, now themselves exhibit gladiatorial
shows, and when the thumbs of the rabble are turned up, let any man be
killed to court the mob. Returned from thence, they farm the public
jakes.
And why not every thing? Since these are the men whom Fortune, whenever
she is in a sportive mood, raises from the dust to the highest pinnacle
of greatness. [111]
What shall _I_ do at Rome? I can not lie; if a book is bad, I can
not praise it and beg a copy. I know not the motions of the stars. I
neither will nor can promise a man to secure his father's death. I
never inspected the entrails of a toad. [112]
Let others understand how to bear to a bride the messages and presents
of the adulterer; no one shall be a thief by my co-operation; and
therefore I go forth, a companion to no man,[113] as though I were
crippled, and a trunk useless from its right hand being disabled. [114]
Who, now-a-days, is beloved except the confidant of crime, and he whose
raging mind[115] is boiling with things concealed, and that must never
be divulged? He that has made you the partaker of an honest secret,
thinks that he owes you nothing, and nothing will he ever pay. He will
be Verres' dear friend, who can accuse Verres at any time he pleases.
Yet set not thou so high a price on all the sands of shady Tagus,[116]
and the gold rolled down to the sea, as to lose your sleep, and to your
sorrow take bribes that ought to be spurned,[117] and be always dreaded
by your powerful friend.
What class of men is now most welcome to our rich men, and whom I would
especially shun, I will soon tell you; nor shall shame prevent me. [118]
It is that the city is become Greek, Quirites, that I can not tolerate;
and yet how small the proportion even of the dregs of Greece! Syrian
Orontes has long since flowed into the Tiber, and brought with it its
language, morals, and the crooked harps with the flute-player, and its
national tambourines, and girls made to stand for hire at the Circus.
Go thither, ye who fancy a barbarian harlot with embroidered turban.
That rustic of thine, Quirinus, takes his Greek supper-cloak, and wears
Greek prizes on his neck besmeared with Ceroma. [119] One forsaking
steep Sicyon, another Amydon, a third from Andros, another from Samos,
another again from Tralles, or Alabanda,[120] swarm to Esquiliæ, and
the hill called from its osiers, destined to be the very vitals, and
future lords of great houses. [121] These have a quick wit, desperate
impudence, a ready speech, more rapidly fluent even than Isæus. [122]
Tell me what you fancy he is? He has brought with him whatever
character you wish--grammarian, rhetorician, geometer, painter,
trainer,[123] soothsayer, rope-dancer, physician, wizard--he knows
every thing. Bid the hungry Greekling go to heaven! He'll go. [124] In
short, it was neither Moor, nor Sarmatian, nor Thracian, that took
wings, but one born in the heart of Athens. [125] Shall I not shun these
men's purple robes? Shall this fellow take precedence of me in signing
his name, and recline pillowed on a more honorable couch than I, though
imported to Rome by the same wind that brought the plums and figs? [126]
Does it then go so utterly for nothing, that my infancy inhaled the
air of Aventine, nourished on the Sabine berry? Why add that this
nation, most deeply versed in flattery, praises the conversation of
an ignorant, the face of a hideously ugly friend, and compares some
weak fellow's crane-like neck to the brawny shoulders of Hercules,
holding Antæus far from his mother Earth: and is in raptures at the
squeaking voice,[127] not a whit superior in sound to that of the
cock as he bites the hen. We may, it is true, praise the same things,
if we choose. But _they_ are believed. Can he be reckoned a better
actor,[128] when he takes the part of Thais, or acts the wife in the
play, or Doris[129] without her robe. It is surely a woman in reality
that seems to speak, and not a man personifying one. You would swear
it was a woman, perfect in all respects. In their country, neither
Antiochus, nor Stratocles, or Demetrius and the effeminate Hæmus, would
call forth admiration. For there every man's an actor. Do you smile? He
is convulsed with a laugh far more hearty. If he spies a tear in his
friend's eye, he bursts into a flood of weeping; though in reality he
feels no grief. If at the winter solstice you ask for a little fire, he
calls for his thick coat. If you say, I am hot! he breaks into a sweat.
Therefore we are not fairly matched; he has the best of it, who can at
any time, either by night or day, assume a fictitious face; kiss his
hands in ecstasy, quite ready, to praise his patron's grossest acts; if
the golden cup has emitted a sound, when its bottom is inverted.
Besides, there is nothing that is held sacred by these fellows, or
that is safe from their lust. Neither the mistress of the house, nor
your virgin daughter, nor her suitor, unbearded as yet, nor your son,
heretofore chaste. If none of these are to be found, he assails his
friend's grandmother. They aim at learning the secrets of the house,
and from that knowledge be feared.
And since we have begun to make mention of the Greeks, pass on to their
schools of philosophy, and hear the foul crime of the more dignified
cloak. [130] It was a Stoic that killed Bareas--the informer, his
personal friend--the old man, his own pupil--bred on that shore[131]
on which the pinion of the Gorgonean horse lighted. There is no room
for any Roman here, where some Protogenes, or Diphilus, or Erimanthus
reigns supreme; who, with the common vice of his race, never shares
a friend, but engrosses him entirely to himself. For when he has
infused into his patron's too ready ear one little drop of the venom
of his nature and his country, I am ejected from the door; all my
long-protracted service goes for naught. Nowhere is the loss of a
client of less account. Besides (not to flatter ourselves) what service
can the _poor man_ render, what merit can _he_ plead, even though he be
zealous enough to hasten in his toga[132] before break of day, when the
very _prætor_ himself urges on his lictor, and bids him hurry on with
headlong speed, since the childless matrons have been long awake, lest
his colleague[133] be beforehand with him in paying his respects to
Albina and Modia. Here, by the side of a slave, if only rich, walks the
son of the free-born;[134] for the other gives to Calvina, or Catiena
(that he may enjoy her once or twice), as much as the tribunes in the
legion receive;[135] whereas you, when the face of a well-dressed
harlot takes your fancy, hesitate to hand Chione from her exalted seat.
Produce me at Rome a witness of as blameless integrity as the host
of the Idæan deity;[136] let Numa stand forth, or he that rescued
Minerva when in jeopardy from her temple all in flames: the question
first put would be as to his income, that about his moral character
would come last of all. "How many slaves does he keep? How many acres
of public land does he occupy? [137] With how many and what expensive
dishes is his table spread? " In exact proportion to the sum of money
a man keeps in his chest, is the credit given to his oath. Though
you were to swear by all the altars of the Samothracian and our own
gods, the poor man is believed to despise the thunderbolts and the
gods, even with the sanction of the gods themselves. Why add that this
same poor man furnishes material and grounds for ridicule to all, if
his cloak is dirty and torn, if his toga is a little soiled, and one
shoe gapes with its upper leather burst; or if more than one patch
displays the coarse fresh darning thread, where a rent has been sewn
up. Poverty, bitter though it be, has no sharper pang than this, that
it makes men ridiculous. "Let him retire, if he has any shame left,
and quit the cushions of the knights, that has not the income required
by the law, and let these seats be taken by"--the sons of pimps,
in whatever brothel born! [138] Here let the son of the sleek crier
applaud among the spruce youths of the gladiator, and the scions of
the fencing-school. Such is the will of the vain Otho, who made the
distinction between us.
Who was ever allowed at Rome to become a son-in-law if his estate was
inferior, and not a match for the portion of the young lady? [139]
What _poor_ man's name appears in any will? When is he summoned to
a consultation even by an ædile? All Quirites that are poor, ought
long ago to have emigrated in a body. [140] Difficult indeed is it for
those to emerge from obscurity whose noble qualities are cramped by
narrow means at home; but at Rome, for men like these, the attempt is
still more hopeless; it is only at an exorbitant price they can get
a wretched lodging, keep for their servants, and a frugal meal. [141]
A man is ashamed here to dine off pottery ware,[142] which, were
he suddenly transported to the Marsi and a Sabine board, contented
there with a coarse bowl of blue earthenware, he would no longer
deem discreditable. There is a large portion of Italy (if we allow
the fact), where no one puts on the toga, except the dead. [143] Even
when the very majesty of festival days is celebrated in a theatre
reared of turf,[144] and the well-known farce at length returns to the
stage,[145] when the rustic infant on its mother's lap is terrified at
the wide mouth of the ghastly mask, _there_ you will see all costumes
equal and alike, both orchestra and common people. White tunics are
quite sufficient as the robe of distinction for the highest personages
there, even the very ædiles. Here, in Rome, the splendor of dress is
carried beyond men's means; here, something more than is enough, is
taken occasionally from another's chest. In this fault all participate.
Here we all live with a poverty that apes our betters. Why should I
detain you? Every thing at Rome is coupled with high price. What have
you to give, that you may occasionally pay your respects to Cossus?
that Veiento may give you a passing glance, though without deigning to
open his mouth? One shaves the beard, another deposits the hair of a
favorite; the house is full of venal cakes. [146] Now learn this fact,
and keep it to work within your breast. We clients are forced to pay
tribute and increase the private income of these pampered slaves.
Who dreads, or ever did dread, the falling of a house at cool
Præneste, or at Volsinii seated among the well-wooded hills, or simple
Gabii,[147] or the heights of sloping Tibur. We, in Rome, inhabit a
city propped in great measure on a slender shore. [148] For so the
steward props up the falling walls,[149] and when he has plastered over
the old and gaping crack, bids us sleep without sense of danger while
ruin hangs over our heads! [150] I must live in a place, where there are
no fires, no nightly alarms. Already is Ucalegon shouting for water,
already is he removing his chattels: the third story in the house you
live in is already in a blaze. You are unconscious! For if the alarm
begin from the bottom of the stairs, he will be the last to be burned
whom a single tile protects from the rain, where the tame pigeons lay
their eggs. Codrus had a bed too small for his Procula, six little jugs
the ornament of his sideboard, and a little can besides beneath it, and
a Chiron reclining under the same marble; and a chest now grown old in
the service contained his Greek books, and opic[151] mice-gnawed poems
of divine inspiration. Codrus possessed nothing at all; who denies the
fact? and yet all that little nothing that he had, he lost. But the
climax that crowns his misery is the fact, that though he is stark
naked and begging for a few scraps, no one will lend a hand to help him
to bed and board. But, if the great mansion of Asturius has fallen,
the matrons appear in weeds,[152] the senators in mourning robes, the
prætor adjourns the courts. Then it is we groan for the accidents of
the city; then we loathe the very name of fire. The fire is still
raging, and already there runs up to him one who offers to present
him with marble, and contribute toward the rebuilding. Another will
present him with naked statues of Parian marble,[153] another with a
chef-d'œuvre of Euphranor or Polycletus. [154] Some lady will contribute
some ancient ornaments of gods taken in our Asiatic victories; another,
books and cases[155] and a bust of Minerva; another, a whole bushel of
silver. Persicus, the most splendid of childless men, replaces all
he has lost by things more numerous and more valuable, and might with
reason be suspected of having himself set his own house on fire. [156]
If you can tear yourself away from the games in the circus,[157] you
can buy a capital house at Sora, or Fabrateria, or Frusino, for the
price at which you are now hiring your dark hole for one year. There
you will have your little garden, a well so shallow as to require no
rope and bucket, whence with easy draught you may water your sprouting
plants. Live there, enamored of the pitchfork, and the dresser of your
trim garden,[158] from which you could supply a feast to a hundred
Pythagoreans. It is something to be able in any spot, in any retreat
whatever, to have made one's self proprietor even of a single lizard.
Here full many a patient dies from want of sleep; but that exhaustion
is produced by the undigested food that loads the fevered stomach. For
what lodging-houses allow of sleep? None but the very wealthy can sleep
at Rome. [159] Hence is the source of the disease. The passing of wagons
in the narrow curves of the streets, and the mutual revilings of the
teamdrivers[160] brought to a stand-still, would banish sleep even from
Drusus and sea-calves. [161]
If duty calls him,[162] the rich man will be borne through the yielding
crowd, and pass rapidly over their heads on the shoulders of his tall
Liburnian, and, as he goes, will read or write, or even sleep inside
his litter,[163] for his sedan with windows closed entices sleep. And
still he will arrive before us. In front of us, as we hurry on, a tide
of human beings stops the way; the mass that follows behind presses on
our loins in dense concourse; one man pokes me with his elbow, another
with a hard pole;[164] one knocks a beam against my head, another a
ten-gallon cask. My legs are coated thick with mud; then, anon, I am
trampled upon by great heels all round me, and the hob-nail of the
soldier's caliga remains imprinted on my toe.
Do you not see with what a smoke the sportula is frequented? A
hundred guests! and each followed by his portable kitchen. [165] Even
Corbulo[166] himself could scarcely carry such a number of huge
vessels, so many things piled upon his head, which, without bending his
neck, the wretched little slave supports, and keeps fanning his fire as
he runs along. [167]
Tunics that have been patched together are torn asunder again.
Presently, as the tug approaches, the long fir-tree quivers, other
wagons are conveying pine-trees; they totter from their height, and
threaten ruin to the crowd. For if that wain, that is transporting
blocks of Ligustican stone, is upset, and pours its mountain-load upon
the masses below, what is there left of their bodies? Who can find
their limbs or bones? Every single carcass of the mob is crushed to
minute atoms as impalpable as their souls. While, all this while, the
family at home, in happy ignorance of their master's fate, are washing
up the dishes, and blowing up the fire with their mouths, and making
a clatter with the well-oiled strigils, and arranging the bathing
towels with the full oilflask. Such are the various occupations of the
bustling slaves. But the master himself is at this moment seated[168]
on the banks of Styx, and, being a novice, is horrified at the grim
ferry-man, and dares not hope for the boat to cross the murky stream;
nor has he, poor wretch, the obol in his mouth to hand to Charon.
Now revert to other perils of the night distinct from these. What a
height it is from the lofty roofs, from which a potsherd tumbles on
your brains. How often cracked and chipped earthenware falls from the
windows! with what a weight they dint and damage the flint pavement
where they strike it! You may well be accounted remiss and improvident
against unforeseen accident, if you go out to supper without having
made your will. It is clear that there are just so many chances of
death, as there are open windows where the inmates are awake inside, as
you pass by. Pray, therefore, and bear about with you this miserable
wish, that they may be contented with throwing down only what the broad
basins have held. One that is drunk, and quarrelsome in his cups, if
he has chanced to give no one a beating, suffers the penalty by loss
of sleep; he passes such a night as Achilles bewailing the loss, of
his friend;[169] lies now on his face, then again on his back. Under
other circumstances, he can not sleep. In some persons, sleep is the
result of quarrels; but though daring from his years, and flushed
with unmixed wine, he cautiously avoids him whom a scarlet cloak,
and a very long train of attendants, with plenty of flambeaux and a
bronzed candelabrum, warns him to steer clear of. As for me, whose
only attendant home[170] is the moon, or the glimmering light of a
rushlight, whose wick I husband and eke out--he utterly despises me!
Mark the prelude of this wretched fray, if fray it can be called, where
he does all the beating, and I am only beaten. [171] He stands right
in front of you, and bids you stand! Obey you must. For what can you
do, when he that gives the command is mad with drink, and at the same
time stronger than you. "Where do you come from? " he thunders out:
"With whose vinegar and beans are you blown out? What cobbler has been
feasting on chopped leek[172] or boiled sheep's head with you? Don't
you answer? Speak, or be kicked! Say where do you hang out? In what
Jew's begging-stand shall I look for you? " Whether you attempt to say a
word or retire in silence, is all one; they beat you just the same, and
then, in a passion, force you to give bail to answer for the assault.
This is a poor man's liberty! When thrashed he humbly begs, and
pummeled with fisticuffs supplicates, to be allowed to quit the spot
with a few teeth left in his head. Nor is this yet all that you have to
fear, for there will not be wanting one to rob you, when all the houses
are shut up, and all the fastenings of the shops chained, are fixed and
silent.
Sometimes too a footpad does your business with his knife, whenever
the Pontine marshes and the Gallinarian wood are kept safe by an
armed guard. Consequently they all flock thence to Rome as to a great
preserve.
What forge or anvil is not weighed down with chains? The greatest
amount of iron used is employed in forging fetters; so that you may
well fear that enough may not be left for plowshares, and that mattocks
and hoes may run short. Well may you call our great-grandsires[173]
happy, and the ages blest in which they lived, which, under kings and
tribunes long ago, saw Rome contented with a single jail. [174]
To these I could subjoin other reasons for leaving Rome, and more
numerous than these; but my cattle summon me to be moving, and the
sun is getting low. I must go. For long ago the muleteer gave me
a hint by shaking his whip. Farewell then, and forget me not! and
whenever Rome shall restore you to your native Aquinum, eager to
refresh your strength, then you may tear me away too from Cumæ to
Helvine Ceres,[175] and your patron deity Diana. Then, equipped with
my caligæ,[176] I will visit your chilly regions, to help you in your
satires--unless they scorn my poor assistance.
FOOTNOTES:
[101] _Prochyta. _ An island in the Bay of Naples, now called Procida.
[102] _Sævæ_, "from the ceaseless alarms it causes. " "Sævus est qui
_terret_. " Donat. in Ter. , Adelp. , v. s. iv.
[103] _Augusto. _ Cf. Plin. , 1, Epist. xiii. "Magnum proventum poëtarum
annus hic attulit; toto mense Aprili nullus ferè dies quo non recitaret
aliquis. "
[104] Either those of Romulus, or the aqueduct; and "moist Capena,"
either from the constant dripping of the aqueduct (hence arcus
stillans), or from the springs near it, hence called Fontinalis; now
St. Sebastian's gate. It opens on the Via Appia.
[105] Cf. vi. , 542.
[106]
"O how much more devoutly should we cling
To thoughts that hover round the sacred spring! " Badham.
Read præsentius: cf. Plin. , Ep. viii. , 8, the description of the
Clitumnus, and Ov. , Met. , iii. , 155, _seq. _
[107] Umbritius (aruspicum in nostro ævo peritissimus, Plin. , x. , c.
iii. ) is said to have predicted Galba's death, and probably therefore,
with Juvenal, cordially hated Otho.
[108] _Portus_ may mean, "constructing" or "repairing" harbors; or
"farming the harbor-dues," portoria.
[109] Scipio's was performed by contract. Plin. , H. N. , xxxi. , 3.
[110] The spear was set up in the forum to show that an auction was
going on there. Hence things so sold were said to be sold _sub hastâ_.
_Domina_, implies "the right of disposal" of all things and persons
there put up. This may mean, therefore, to buy a drove of slaves
on speculation, and sell them again by auction; or, when they have
squandered their all, put themselves up to sale. So Britann. Dryden,
"For gain they sell their very head. " "Salable as slaves. " Hodgson. So
Browne, who reads "præbere caput domino. "
[111] "From abject meanness lifts to wealth and power.
by the secret torch-light which the Baptæ celebrated, who used to
weary out even the Athenian Cotytto. [91] One with needle held oblique
adds length to his eyebrows touched with moistened soot, and raising
the lids paints his quivering eyes. Another drains a Priapus-shaped
glass, and confines his long thick hair with a caul of gold thread,
clothed in sky-blue checks, or close-piled yellow stuffs; while his
attendant also swears by Juno, the patron deity of his master. Another
holds a mirror, the weapon wielded by the pathic Otho, "the spoil of
Auruncan Actor,"[92] in which he surveyed himself when fully armed,
before he gave the signal to engage--a thing worthy to be recorded in
the latest annals and history of the day. A mirror! fit baggage for
a civil war! O yes, forsooth! to kill old Galba shows the consummate
general, to pamper one's complexion is the consistent occupation of
the first citizen of Rome; to aspire to the empire as the prize on
Bebriacum's[93] plains, and then spread over his face a poultice
applied with his fingers! Such an act as neither the quivered Semiramis
perpetrated in the Assyrian realms, or Cleopatra flying dejected in her
Actian galley. Among this crew there is neither decency of language,
nor respect for the proprieties of the table. Here is the foul license
that Cybele enjoins, the lisping speech, the aged priest with hoary
hair, like one possessed, a prodigy of boundless appetite, open to
hire. Yet why do they delay? since long ago they ought after the
Phrygian custom to have removed with their knives the superfluous flesh.
Gracchus[94] gave four hundred sestertia as his dowry, with himself,
to a bugler, or else one that blew the straight trumpet. The marriage
deeds were duly signed, the blessing invoked, a great dinner provided,
the he-bride lay in the bridegroom's arms. O nobles! is it a censor
we need, or an aruspex? You would without doubt be horrified, and deem
it a prodigy of portentous import, if a woman gave birth to a calf, or
a cow to a lamb. The same Gracchus puts on flounces, the long robe and
flame-colored[95] veil, who, when bearing the sacred shields swinging
with mysterious thong, sweated beneath the Ancilia! Oh! father of
our city! whence came such heinous guilt to the shepherds of Latium?
Whence, O Gradivus, came this unnatural lust that has tainted thy race?
See! a man illustrious in birth and rank is made over to a man! Dost
thou neither shake thy helmet, nor smite the earth with thy lance? Dost
thou not even appeal to thy father Jove? Begone then! and quit the
acres of the Campus once so severe, which thou ceasest to care for!
"I have some duty-work to perform to-morrow at break of day in the
Quirinal valley. " "What is the occasion? " "Why ask? my friend is going
to be married; only a few are invited! " If we only live to see it,
these things will be done in the broad light of day, and claim to be
registered in the public acts. Meanwhile, there is one grievous source
of pain that clings to these male-brides, that they are incapable
of bearing, and retaining their lords' affections by bringing them
children. No! better is it that nature in this case gives their minds
no power over their bodies! They must die barren! Vain, in their case,
is fat Lyde with her medicated box; vain the holding out their hands to
the nimble Luperci.
Yet even this prodigy of crime is surpassed by the trident of Gracchus
in his gladiator's tunic,[96] when in full flight he traverses the
middle of the arena. Gracchus! more nobly born than the Manlii, and
Marcelli, and Catulus' and Paulus' race, and the Fabii, and all the
spectators in the front row. Ay, even though you add to these the very
man himself, at whose expense he cast his net as Retiarius.
That there are departed spirits, and realms beneath the earth--that
Charon's pole exists, and the foul frogs in the Stygian whirlpool--and
that so many thousand souls cross its waters in a single bark, not
even boys believe, save those as yet too young to be charged for their
bath. [97] But do thou believe them true! What does Curius feel, and
the two Scipios, what Fabricius and the shades of Camillus, what the
legion cut off at Cremera, and the flower of Roman youth slaughtered
at Cannæ--so many martial spirits--what do they feel when such a shade
as this passes from us to them? They would long to be cleansed from
the pollution of the contact, could any sulphur and pine-torches be
supplied to them, or could there be a bay-tree to sprinkle them with
water.
To such a pitch of degradation are we come! [98] We have, indeed,
advanced our arms beyond Juverna's shore, and the Orcades[99] recently
subdued, and the Britons content with night contracted to its briefest
span. But those abominations which are committed in the victorious
people's city are unknown to those barbarians whom we have conquered.
"Yet there _is_ a story told of one, an Armenian Zalates, who, more
effeminate than the rest of his young countrymen, is reported to have
yielded to the tribune's lust. " See the result of intercourse with
Rome! He came a hostage! Here they learn to be _men_! For if a longer
tarry in the city be granted to these youths, they will never lack a
lover. Their plaids, and knives, and bits, and whips, will soon be
discarded. Thus it is the vices of our young nobles are aped even at
Artaxata. [100]
FOOTNOTES:
[83] Alluding to the comic exclamation, "O Cœlum, O Terra, O Maria
Neptuni. " Vid. Ter. , Adelph. , v. , i. , 4. Cf. Sat. vi. , 283.
[84] _Nuper. _ The allusion is to Domitian and his niece Julia, who died
from the use of abortives (cf. Plin. , iv. , Epist. xi. : "Vidua abortu
periit"), cir. A. D. 91. This, therefore, fixes the date of the Satire,
which was probably one of Juvenal's earliest, and written when he was
about thirty. Cf. Sat. xiii. , 17.
[85] Cf. vi. , 368.
[86] _Vexantur. _ E somno excitantur, alluding to "Lex Julia Dormis? "
Cf. i. , 126.
[87] The whole of this ironical defense contains the bitterest satire
upon the women of Rome, as all these crimes he proves in the 6th Satire
to be of every-day occurrence.
[88] _Puellæ. _ Cf. Sat. ix. , 70, _seq. _
[89] _Cylindros_, called, vi. , 459, "Elenchos. " Cf. Arist. , Fr. , 300,
ἑλικτῆρες.
[90] _Nudus_, i. e. , in the Roman sense, without the toga.
[91] _Cotytto_ herself, the goddess of licentiousness, was wearied with
their impurities.
[92] _Actoris. _ Æn. , xii. , 94.
[93] _Bebriacum_, between Verona and Cremona, where the deciding battle
was fought between Otho and Vitellius.
[94] _Gracchus. _ In the same manner Nero was married to one Pythagoras,
"in modum solennium conjugiorum denupsisset. " Tac. , Ann. , xv. , 37. He
repeated the same act with Sporus.
[95] _Flammea. _ Vid. Tac. , u. s. "Inditum imperatori flammeum, visi
auspices, dos, et genialis torus et faces nuptiales: cuncta denique
spectata, quæ etiam in feminâ nox operit. "
[96] _Tunicati. _ Vid. Sat. vi. , 256; viii. , 203. Movet ecce tridentem.
Credamus tunicæ, etc.
[97] _Nondum ære lavantur. _ The fee was a quadrans: vi. , 447.
[98] _Traducimur. _ Cf. viii. , 17. Squalentes traducit avos.
[99] _Modo captas Orcadas. _ A. D. 78, Clinton, F. R. "Insulas quas
Orcadas vocant, invenit domuitque. " Tac. , Agric. , c. x. ; cf. c.
xii. "Dierum spatia ultra nostri orbis mensuram: _nox_ clara, et
extremâ Britanniæ parte _brevis_, ut finem atque initium lucis exiguo
discrimine internoscas. "
[100] _Referunt. _ Cf. i. , 41. "Multum _referens_ de Mæcenate supino. "
The fashion is not only _carried_ back to Armenia, but _copied_ there.
_Prætextatus. _ Cf. i. , 78. _Artaxata_, the capital of Armenia, was
taken by Corbulo, A. D. 58.
SATIRE III.
Although troubled at the departure of my old friend, yet I can not but
commend his intention of fixing his abode at Cumæ, now desolate, and
giving the Sibyl one citizen at least. It is the high road to Baiæ, and
has a pleasant shore; a delightful retreat. I prefer even Prochyta[101]
to the Suburra. For what have we ever looked on so wretched or so
lonely, that you would not deem it worse to be in constant dread of
fires, the perpetual falling-in of houses, and the thousand dangers of
the cruel city,[102] and poets spouting in the month of August. [103]
But while his whole household is being stowed in a single wagon, my
friend Umbritius halted at the ancient triumphal arches[104] and the
moist Capena. Here, where Numa used to make assignations with his
nocturnal mistress, the grove of the once-hallowed fountain and the
temples are in our days let out to Jews, whose whole furniture is a
basket and bundle of hay. [105] For every single tree is bid to pay a
rent to the people, and the Camenæ having been ejected, the wood is
one mass of beggars. We descended into the valley of Egeria and the
grottoes, so altered from what nature made them. How much more should
we feel the influence of the presiding genius of the spring,[106]
if turf inclosed the waters with its margin of green, and no marble
profaned the native tufo. Here then Umbritius began:[107]
"Since at Rome there is no place for honest pursuits, no profit to be
got by honest toil--my fortune is less to-day than it was yesterday,
and to-morrow must again make that little less--we purpose emigrating
to the spot where Dædalus put off his wearied wings, while my gray
hairs are still but few, my old age green and erect; while something
yet remains for Lachesis to spin, and I can bear myself on my own legs,
without a staff to support my right hand. Let us leave our native land.
There let Arturius and Catulus live. Let those continue in it who turn
black to white; for whom it is an easy matter to get contracts for
building temples, clearing rivers, constructing harbors,[108] cleansing
the sewers, the furnishing a funeral,[109] and under the mistress-spear
set up the slave to sale. "[110]
These fellows, who in former days were horn-blowers, and constant
attendants on the municipal amphitheatres, and whose puffed cheeks were
well known through all the towns, now themselves exhibit gladiatorial
shows, and when the thumbs of the rabble are turned up, let any man be
killed to court the mob. Returned from thence, they farm the public
jakes.
And why not every thing? Since these are the men whom Fortune, whenever
she is in a sportive mood, raises from the dust to the highest pinnacle
of greatness. [111]
What shall _I_ do at Rome? I can not lie; if a book is bad, I can
not praise it and beg a copy. I know not the motions of the stars. I
neither will nor can promise a man to secure his father's death. I
never inspected the entrails of a toad. [112]
Let others understand how to bear to a bride the messages and presents
of the adulterer; no one shall be a thief by my co-operation; and
therefore I go forth, a companion to no man,[113] as though I were
crippled, and a trunk useless from its right hand being disabled. [114]
Who, now-a-days, is beloved except the confidant of crime, and he whose
raging mind[115] is boiling with things concealed, and that must never
be divulged? He that has made you the partaker of an honest secret,
thinks that he owes you nothing, and nothing will he ever pay. He will
be Verres' dear friend, who can accuse Verres at any time he pleases.
Yet set not thou so high a price on all the sands of shady Tagus,[116]
and the gold rolled down to the sea, as to lose your sleep, and to your
sorrow take bribes that ought to be spurned,[117] and be always dreaded
by your powerful friend.
What class of men is now most welcome to our rich men, and whom I would
especially shun, I will soon tell you; nor shall shame prevent me. [118]
It is that the city is become Greek, Quirites, that I can not tolerate;
and yet how small the proportion even of the dregs of Greece! Syrian
Orontes has long since flowed into the Tiber, and brought with it its
language, morals, and the crooked harps with the flute-player, and its
national tambourines, and girls made to stand for hire at the Circus.
Go thither, ye who fancy a barbarian harlot with embroidered turban.
That rustic of thine, Quirinus, takes his Greek supper-cloak, and wears
Greek prizes on his neck besmeared with Ceroma. [119] One forsaking
steep Sicyon, another Amydon, a third from Andros, another from Samos,
another again from Tralles, or Alabanda,[120] swarm to Esquiliæ, and
the hill called from its osiers, destined to be the very vitals, and
future lords of great houses. [121] These have a quick wit, desperate
impudence, a ready speech, more rapidly fluent even than Isæus. [122]
Tell me what you fancy he is? He has brought with him whatever
character you wish--grammarian, rhetorician, geometer, painter,
trainer,[123] soothsayer, rope-dancer, physician, wizard--he knows
every thing. Bid the hungry Greekling go to heaven! He'll go. [124] In
short, it was neither Moor, nor Sarmatian, nor Thracian, that took
wings, but one born in the heart of Athens. [125] Shall I not shun these
men's purple robes? Shall this fellow take precedence of me in signing
his name, and recline pillowed on a more honorable couch than I, though
imported to Rome by the same wind that brought the plums and figs? [126]
Does it then go so utterly for nothing, that my infancy inhaled the
air of Aventine, nourished on the Sabine berry? Why add that this
nation, most deeply versed in flattery, praises the conversation of
an ignorant, the face of a hideously ugly friend, and compares some
weak fellow's crane-like neck to the brawny shoulders of Hercules,
holding Antæus far from his mother Earth: and is in raptures at the
squeaking voice,[127] not a whit superior in sound to that of the
cock as he bites the hen. We may, it is true, praise the same things,
if we choose. But _they_ are believed. Can he be reckoned a better
actor,[128] when he takes the part of Thais, or acts the wife in the
play, or Doris[129] without her robe. It is surely a woman in reality
that seems to speak, and not a man personifying one. You would swear
it was a woman, perfect in all respects. In their country, neither
Antiochus, nor Stratocles, or Demetrius and the effeminate Hæmus, would
call forth admiration. For there every man's an actor. Do you smile? He
is convulsed with a laugh far more hearty. If he spies a tear in his
friend's eye, he bursts into a flood of weeping; though in reality he
feels no grief. If at the winter solstice you ask for a little fire, he
calls for his thick coat. If you say, I am hot! he breaks into a sweat.
Therefore we are not fairly matched; he has the best of it, who can at
any time, either by night or day, assume a fictitious face; kiss his
hands in ecstasy, quite ready, to praise his patron's grossest acts; if
the golden cup has emitted a sound, when its bottom is inverted.
Besides, there is nothing that is held sacred by these fellows, or
that is safe from their lust. Neither the mistress of the house, nor
your virgin daughter, nor her suitor, unbearded as yet, nor your son,
heretofore chaste. If none of these are to be found, he assails his
friend's grandmother. They aim at learning the secrets of the house,
and from that knowledge be feared.
And since we have begun to make mention of the Greeks, pass on to their
schools of philosophy, and hear the foul crime of the more dignified
cloak. [130] It was a Stoic that killed Bareas--the informer, his
personal friend--the old man, his own pupil--bred on that shore[131]
on which the pinion of the Gorgonean horse lighted. There is no room
for any Roman here, where some Protogenes, or Diphilus, or Erimanthus
reigns supreme; who, with the common vice of his race, never shares
a friend, but engrosses him entirely to himself. For when he has
infused into his patron's too ready ear one little drop of the venom
of his nature and his country, I am ejected from the door; all my
long-protracted service goes for naught. Nowhere is the loss of a
client of less account. Besides (not to flatter ourselves) what service
can the _poor man_ render, what merit can _he_ plead, even though he be
zealous enough to hasten in his toga[132] before break of day, when the
very _prætor_ himself urges on his lictor, and bids him hurry on with
headlong speed, since the childless matrons have been long awake, lest
his colleague[133] be beforehand with him in paying his respects to
Albina and Modia. Here, by the side of a slave, if only rich, walks the
son of the free-born;[134] for the other gives to Calvina, or Catiena
(that he may enjoy her once or twice), as much as the tribunes in the
legion receive;[135] whereas you, when the face of a well-dressed
harlot takes your fancy, hesitate to hand Chione from her exalted seat.
Produce me at Rome a witness of as blameless integrity as the host
of the Idæan deity;[136] let Numa stand forth, or he that rescued
Minerva when in jeopardy from her temple all in flames: the question
first put would be as to his income, that about his moral character
would come last of all. "How many slaves does he keep? How many acres
of public land does he occupy? [137] With how many and what expensive
dishes is his table spread? " In exact proportion to the sum of money
a man keeps in his chest, is the credit given to his oath. Though
you were to swear by all the altars of the Samothracian and our own
gods, the poor man is believed to despise the thunderbolts and the
gods, even with the sanction of the gods themselves. Why add that this
same poor man furnishes material and grounds for ridicule to all, if
his cloak is dirty and torn, if his toga is a little soiled, and one
shoe gapes with its upper leather burst; or if more than one patch
displays the coarse fresh darning thread, where a rent has been sewn
up. Poverty, bitter though it be, has no sharper pang than this, that
it makes men ridiculous. "Let him retire, if he has any shame left,
and quit the cushions of the knights, that has not the income required
by the law, and let these seats be taken by"--the sons of pimps,
in whatever brothel born! [138] Here let the son of the sleek crier
applaud among the spruce youths of the gladiator, and the scions of
the fencing-school. Such is the will of the vain Otho, who made the
distinction between us.
Who was ever allowed at Rome to become a son-in-law if his estate was
inferior, and not a match for the portion of the young lady? [139]
What _poor_ man's name appears in any will? When is he summoned to
a consultation even by an ædile? All Quirites that are poor, ought
long ago to have emigrated in a body. [140] Difficult indeed is it for
those to emerge from obscurity whose noble qualities are cramped by
narrow means at home; but at Rome, for men like these, the attempt is
still more hopeless; it is only at an exorbitant price they can get
a wretched lodging, keep for their servants, and a frugal meal. [141]
A man is ashamed here to dine off pottery ware,[142] which, were
he suddenly transported to the Marsi and a Sabine board, contented
there with a coarse bowl of blue earthenware, he would no longer
deem discreditable. There is a large portion of Italy (if we allow
the fact), where no one puts on the toga, except the dead. [143] Even
when the very majesty of festival days is celebrated in a theatre
reared of turf,[144] and the well-known farce at length returns to the
stage,[145] when the rustic infant on its mother's lap is terrified at
the wide mouth of the ghastly mask, _there_ you will see all costumes
equal and alike, both orchestra and common people. White tunics are
quite sufficient as the robe of distinction for the highest personages
there, even the very ædiles. Here, in Rome, the splendor of dress is
carried beyond men's means; here, something more than is enough, is
taken occasionally from another's chest. In this fault all participate.
Here we all live with a poverty that apes our betters. Why should I
detain you? Every thing at Rome is coupled with high price. What have
you to give, that you may occasionally pay your respects to Cossus?
that Veiento may give you a passing glance, though without deigning to
open his mouth? One shaves the beard, another deposits the hair of a
favorite; the house is full of venal cakes. [146] Now learn this fact,
and keep it to work within your breast. We clients are forced to pay
tribute and increase the private income of these pampered slaves.
Who dreads, or ever did dread, the falling of a house at cool
Præneste, or at Volsinii seated among the well-wooded hills, or simple
Gabii,[147] or the heights of sloping Tibur. We, in Rome, inhabit a
city propped in great measure on a slender shore. [148] For so the
steward props up the falling walls,[149] and when he has plastered over
the old and gaping crack, bids us sleep without sense of danger while
ruin hangs over our heads! [150] I must live in a place, where there are
no fires, no nightly alarms. Already is Ucalegon shouting for water,
already is he removing his chattels: the third story in the house you
live in is already in a blaze. You are unconscious! For if the alarm
begin from the bottom of the stairs, he will be the last to be burned
whom a single tile protects from the rain, where the tame pigeons lay
their eggs. Codrus had a bed too small for his Procula, six little jugs
the ornament of his sideboard, and a little can besides beneath it, and
a Chiron reclining under the same marble; and a chest now grown old in
the service contained his Greek books, and opic[151] mice-gnawed poems
of divine inspiration. Codrus possessed nothing at all; who denies the
fact? and yet all that little nothing that he had, he lost. But the
climax that crowns his misery is the fact, that though he is stark
naked and begging for a few scraps, no one will lend a hand to help him
to bed and board. But, if the great mansion of Asturius has fallen,
the matrons appear in weeds,[152] the senators in mourning robes, the
prætor adjourns the courts. Then it is we groan for the accidents of
the city; then we loathe the very name of fire. The fire is still
raging, and already there runs up to him one who offers to present
him with marble, and contribute toward the rebuilding. Another will
present him with naked statues of Parian marble,[153] another with a
chef-d'œuvre of Euphranor or Polycletus. [154] Some lady will contribute
some ancient ornaments of gods taken in our Asiatic victories; another,
books and cases[155] and a bust of Minerva; another, a whole bushel of
silver. Persicus, the most splendid of childless men, replaces all
he has lost by things more numerous and more valuable, and might with
reason be suspected of having himself set his own house on fire. [156]
If you can tear yourself away from the games in the circus,[157] you
can buy a capital house at Sora, or Fabrateria, or Frusino, for the
price at which you are now hiring your dark hole for one year. There
you will have your little garden, a well so shallow as to require no
rope and bucket, whence with easy draught you may water your sprouting
plants. Live there, enamored of the pitchfork, and the dresser of your
trim garden,[158] from which you could supply a feast to a hundred
Pythagoreans. It is something to be able in any spot, in any retreat
whatever, to have made one's self proprietor even of a single lizard.
Here full many a patient dies from want of sleep; but that exhaustion
is produced by the undigested food that loads the fevered stomach. For
what lodging-houses allow of sleep? None but the very wealthy can sleep
at Rome. [159] Hence is the source of the disease. The passing of wagons
in the narrow curves of the streets, and the mutual revilings of the
teamdrivers[160] brought to a stand-still, would banish sleep even from
Drusus and sea-calves. [161]
If duty calls him,[162] the rich man will be borne through the yielding
crowd, and pass rapidly over their heads on the shoulders of his tall
Liburnian, and, as he goes, will read or write, or even sleep inside
his litter,[163] for his sedan with windows closed entices sleep. And
still he will arrive before us. In front of us, as we hurry on, a tide
of human beings stops the way; the mass that follows behind presses on
our loins in dense concourse; one man pokes me with his elbow, another
with a hard pole;[164] one knocks a beam against my head, another a
ten-gallon cask. My legs are coated thick with mud; then, anon, I am
trampled upon by great heels all round me, and the hob-nail of the
soldier's caliga remains imprinted on my toe.
Do you not see with what a smoke the sportula is frequented? A
hundred guests! and each followed by his portable kitchen. [165] Even
Corbulo[166] himself could scarcely carry such a number of huge
vessels, so many things piled upon his head, which, without bending his
neck, the wretched little slave supports, and keeps fanning his fire as
he runs along. [167]
Tunics that have been patched together are torn asunder again.
Presently, as the tug approaches, the long fir-tree quivers, other
wagons are conveying pine-trees; they totter from their height, and
threaten ruin to the crowd. For if that wain, that is transporting
blocks of Ligustican stone, is upset, and pours its mountain-load upon
the masses below, what is there left of their bodies? Who can find
their limbs or bones? Every single carcass of the mob is crushed to
minute atoms as impalpable as their souls. While, all this while, the
family at home, in happy ignorance of their master's fate, are washing
up the dishes, and blowing up the fire with their mouths, and making
a clatter with the well-oiled strigils, and arranging the bathing
towels with the full oilflask. Such are the various occupations of the
bustling slaves. But the master himself is at this moment seated[168]
on the banks of Styx, and, being a novice, is horrified at the grim
ferry-man, and dares not hope for the boat to cross the murky stream;
nor has he, poor wretch, the obol in his mouth to hand to Charon.
Now revert to other perils of the night distinct from these. What a
height it is from the lofty roofs, from which a potsherd tumbles on
your brains. How often cracked and chipped earthenware falls from the
windows! with what a weight they dint and damage the flint pavement
where they strike it! You may well be accounted remiss and improvident
against unforeseen accident, if you go out to supper without having
made your will. It is clear that there are just so many chances of
death, as there are open windows where the inmates are awake inside, as
you pass by. Pray, therefore, and bear about with you this miserable
wish, that they may be contented with throwing down only what the broad
basins have held. One that is drunk, and quarrelsome in his cups, if
he has chanced to give no one a beating, suffers the penalty by loss
of sleep; he passes such a night as Achilles bewailing the loss, of
his friend;[169] lies now on his face, then again on his back. Under
other circumstances, he can not sleep. In some persons, sleep is the
result of quarrels; but though daring from his years, and flushed
with unmixed wine, he cautiously avoids him whom a scarlet cloak,
and a very long train of attendants, with plenty of flambeaux and a
bronzed candelabrum, warns him to steer clear of. As for me, whose
only attendant home[170] is the moon, or the glimmering light of a
rushlight, whose wick I husband and eke out--he utterly despises me!
Mark the prelude of this wretched fray, if fray it can be called, where
he does all the beating, and I am only beaten. [171] He stands right
in front of you, and bids you stand! Obey you must. For what can you
do, when he that gives the command is mad with drink, and at the same
time stronger than you. "Where do you come from? " he thunders out:
"With whose vinegar and beans are you blown out? What cobbler has been
feasting on chopped leek[172] or boiled sheep's head with you? Don't
you answer? Speak, or be kicked! Say where do you hang out? In what
Jew's begging-stand shall I look for you? " Whether you attempt to say a
word or retire in silence, is all one; they beat you just the same, and
then, in a passion, force you to give bail to answer for the assault.
This is a poor man's liberty! When thrashed he humbly begs, and
pummeled with fisticuffs supplicates, to be allowed to quit the spot
with a few teeth left in his head. Nor is this yet all that you have to
fear, for there will not be wanting one to rob you, when all the houses
are shut up, and all the fastenings of the shops chained, are fixed and
silent.
Sometimes too a footpad does your business with his knife, whenever
the Pontine marshes and the Gallinarian wood are kept safe by an
armed guard. Consequently they all flock thence to Rome as to a great
preserve.
What forge or anvil is not weighed down with chains? The greatest
amount of iron used is employed in forging fetters; so that you may
well fear that enough may not be left for plowshares, and that mattocks
and hoes may run short. Well may you call our great-grandsires[173]
happy, and the ages blest in which they lived, which, under kings and
tribunes long ago, saw Rome contented with a single jail. [174]
To these I could subjoin other reasons for leaving Rome, and more
numerous than these; but my cattle summon me to be moving, and the
sun is getting low. I must go. For long ago the muleteer gave me
a hint by shaking his whip. Farewell then, and forget me not! and
whenever Rome shall restore you to your native Aquinum, eager to
refresh your strength, then you may tear me away too from Cumæ to
Helvine Ceres,[175] and your patron deity Diana. Then, equipped with
my caligæ,[176] I will visit your chilly regions, to help you in your
satires--unless they scorn my poor assistance.
FOOTNOTES:
[101] _Prochyta. _ An island in the Bay of Naples, now called Procida.
[102] _Sævæ_, "from the ceaseless alarms it causes. " "Sævus est qui
_terret_. " Donat. in Ter. , Adelp. , v. s. iv.
[103] _Augusto. _ Cf. Plin. , 1, Epist. xiii. "Magnum proventum poëtarum
annus hic attulit; toto mense Aprili nullus ferè dies quo non recitaret
aliquis. "
[104] Either those of Romulus, or the aqueduct; and "moist Capena,"
either from the constant dripping of the aqueduct (hence arcus
stillans), or from the springs near it, hence called Fontinalis; now
St. Sebastian's gate. It opens on the Via Appia.
[105] Cf. vi. , 542.
[106]
"O how much more devoutly should we cling
To thoughts that hover round the sacred spring! " Badham.
Read præsentius: cf. Plin. , Ep. viii. , 8, the description of the
Clitumnus, and Ov. , Met. , iii. , 155, _seq. _
[107] Umbritius (aruspicum in nostro ævo peritissimus, Plin. , x. , c.
iii. ) is said to have predicted Galba's death, and probably therefore,
with Juvenal, cordially hated Otho.
[108] _Portus_ may mean, "constructing" or "repairing" harbors; or
"farming the harbor-dues," portoria.
[109] Scipio's was performed by contract. Plin. , H. N. , xxxi. , 3.
[110] The spear was set up in the forum to show that an auction was
going on there. Hence things so sold were said to be sold _sub hastâ_.
_Domina_, implies "the right of disposal" of all things and persons
there put up. This may mean, therefore, to buy a drove of slaves
on speculation, and sell them again by auction; or, when they have
squandered their all, put themselves up to sale. So Britann. Dryden,
"For gain they sell their very head. " "Salable as slaves. " Hodgson. So
Browne, who reads "præbere caput domino. "
[111] "From abject meanness lifts to wealth and power.
