No More Learning

”

“Very fine indeed,” said Miss Crawford, laughing. “It must do the heads
of the family a great deal of good to force all the poor housemaids and
footmen to leave business and pleasure, and say their prayers here twice
a day, while they are inventing excuses themselves for staying away. ”

“_That_ is hardly Fanny’s idea of a family assembling,” said Edmund. “If
the master and mistress do _not_ attend themselves, there must be more
harm than good in the custom. ”

“At any rate, it is safer to leave people to their own devices on such
subjects. Everybody likes to go their own way--to chuse their own time
and manner of devotion. The obligation of attendance, the formality, the
restraint, the length of time--altogether it is a formidable thing, and
what nobody likes; and if the good people who used to kneel and gape in
that gallery could have foreseen that the time would ever come when men
and women might lie another ten minutes in bed, when they woke with a
headache, without danger of reprobation, because chapel was missed,
they would have jumped with joy and envy. Cannot you imagine with what
unwilling feelings the former belles of the house of Rushworth did
many a time repair to this chapel? The young Mrs. Eleanors and Mrs.
Bridgets--starched up into seeming piety, but with heads full of
something very different--especially if the poor chaplain were not worth
looking at--and, in those days, I fancy parsons were very inferior even
to what they are now. ”

For a few moments she was unanswered. Fanny coloured and looked
at Edmund, but felt too angry for speech; and he needed a little
recollection before he could say, “Your lively mind can hardly be
serious even on serious subjects. You have given us an amusing sketch,
and human nature cannot say it was not so. We must all feel _at_ _times_
the difficulty of fixing our thoughts as we could wish; but if you are
supposing it a frequent thing, that is to say, a weakness grown into a
habit from neglect, what could be expected from the _private_ devotions
of such persons? Do you think the minds which are suffered, which
are indulged in wanderings in a chapel, would be more collected in a
closet? ”

“Yes, very likely. They would have two chances at least in their favour.
There would be less to distract the attention from without, and it would
not be tried so long. ”

“The mind which does not struggle against itself under _one_
circumstance, would find objects to distract it in the _other_, I
believe; and the influence of the place and of example may often rouse
better feelings than are begun with. The greater length of the service,
however, I admit to be sometimes too hard a stretch upon the mind. One
wishes it were not so; but I have not yet left Oxford long enough to
forget what chapel prayers are. ”

While this was passing, the rest of the party being scattered about the
chapel, Julia called Mr. Crawford’s attention to her sister, by saying,
“Do look at Mr. Rushworth and Maria, standing side by side, exactly as
if the ceremony were going to be performed. Have not they completely the
air of it? ”

Mr. Crawford smiled his acquiescence, and stepping forward to Maria,
said, in a voice which she only could hear, “I do not like to see Miss
Bertram so near the altar. ”

Starting, the lady instinctively moved a step or two, but recovering
herself in a moment, affected to laugh, and asked him, in a tone not
much louder, “If he would give her away? ”

“I am afraid I should do it very awkwardly,” was his reply, with a look
of meaning.

Julia, joining them at the moment, carried on the joke.

“Upon my word, it is really a pity that it should not take place
directly, if we had but a proper licence, for here we are altogether,
and nothing in the world could be more snug and pleasant. ” And she
talked and laughed about it with so little caution as to catch the
comprehension of Mr. Rushworth and his mother, and expose her sister to
the whispered gallantries of her lover, while Mrs. Rushworth spoke
with proper smiles and dignity of its being a most happy event to her
whenever it took place.

“If Edmund were but in orders! ” cried Julia, and running to where he
stood with Miss Crawford and Fanny: “My dear Edmund, if you were but in
orders now, you might perform the ceremony directly. How unlucky that
you are not ordained; Mr. Rushworth and Maria are quite ready. ”

Miss Crawford’s countenance, as Julia spoke, might have amused a
disinterested observer. She looked almost aghast under the new idea she
was receiving. Fanny pitied her. “How distressed she will be at what she
said just now,” passed across her mind.

“Ordained! ” said Miss Crawford; “what, are you to be a clergyman? ”

“Yes; I shall take orders soon after my father’s return--probably at
Christmas. ”

Miss Crawford, rallying her spirits, and recovering her complexion,
replied only, “If I had known this before, I would have spoken of the
cloth with more respect,” and turned the subject.

The chapel was soon afterwards left to the silence and stillness
which reigned in it, with few interruptions, throughout the year. Miss
Bertram, displeased with her sister, led the way, and all seemed to feel
that they had been there long enough.

The lower part of the house had been now entirely shewn, and Mrs.
Rushworth, never weary in the cause, would have proceeded towards the
principal staircase, and taken them through all the rooms above, if her
son had not interposed with a doubt of there being time enough. “For
if,” said he, with the sort of self-evident proposition which many a
clearer head does not always avoid, “we are _too_ long going over the
house, we shall not have time for what is to be done out of doors. It is
past two, and we are to dine at five. ”

Mrs. Rushworth submitted; and the question of surveying the grounds,
with the who and the how, was likely to be more fully agitated, and Mrs.
Norris was beginning to arrange by what junction of carriages and horses
most could be done, when the young people, meeting with an outward door,
temptingly open on a flight of steps which led immediately to turf and
shrubs, and all the sweets of pleasure-grounds, as by one impulse, one
wish for air and liberty, all walked out.

“Suppose we turn down here for the present,” said Mrs. Rushworth,
civilly taking the hint and following them. “Here are the greatest
number of our plants, and here are the curious pheasants. ”

“Query,” said Mr. Crawford, looking round him, “whether we may not find
something to employ us here before we go farther? I see walls of great
promise. Mr. Rushworth, shall we summon a council on this lawn? ”

“James,” said Mrs. Rushworth to her son, “I believe the wilderness
will be new to all the party. The Miss Bertrams have never seen the
wilderness yet. ”

No objection was made, but for some time there seemed no inclination to
move in any plan, or to any distance. All were attracted at first by the
plants or the pheasants, and all dispersed about in happy independence.
Mr. Crawford was the first to move forward to examine the capabilities
of that end of the house. The lawn, bounded on each side by a high wall,
contained beyond the first planted area a bowling-green, and beyond
the bowling-green a long terrace walk, backed by iron palisades, and
commanding a view over them into the tops of the trees of the wilderness
immediately adjoining. It was a good spot for fault-finding. Mr.
Crawford was soon followed by Miss Bertram and Mr. Rushworth; and when,
after a little time, the others began to form into parties, these three
were found in busy consultation on the terrace by Edmund, Miss Crawford,
and Fanny, who seemed as naturally to unite, and who, after a short
participation of their regrets and difficulties, left them and walked
on. The remaining three, Mrs. Rushworth, Mrs. Norris, and Julia, were
still far behind; for Julia, whose happy star no longer prevailed,
was obliged to keep by the side of Mrs. Rushworth, and restrain her
impatient feet to that lady’s slow pace, while her aunt, having fallen
in with the housekeeper, who was come out to feed the pheasants, was
lingering behind in gossip with her. Poor Julia, the only one out of
the nine not tolerably satisfied with their lot, was now in a state of
complete penance, and as different from the Julia of the barouche-box as
could well be imagined. The politeness which she had been brought up to
practise as a duty made it impossible for her to escape; while the
want of that higher species of self-command, that just consideration of
others, that knowledge of her own heart, that principle of right, which
had not formed any essential part of her education, made her miserable
under it.

“This is insufferably hot,” said Miss Crawford, when they had taken one
turn on the terrace, and were drawing a second time to the door in the
middle which opened to the wilderness. “Shall any of us object to being
comfortable? Here is a nice little wood, if one can but get into it.
What happiness if the door should not be locked! but of course it is;
for in these great places the gardeners are the only people who can go
where they like. ”

The door, however, proved not to be locked, and they were all agreed in
turning joyfully through it, and leaving the unmitigated glare of day
behind. A considerable flight of steps landed them in the wilderness,
which was a planted wood of about two acres, and though chiefly of
larch and laurel, and beech cut down, and though laid out with too much
regularity, was darkness and shade, and natural beauty, compared with
the bowling-green and the terrace. They all felt the refreshment of it,
and for some time could only walk and admire. At length, after a short
pause, Miss Crawford began with, “So you are to be a clergyman, Mr.
Bertram. This is rather a surprise to me. ”

“Why should it surprise you? You must suppose me designed for some
profession, and might perceive that I am neither a lawyer, nor a
soldier, nor a sailor. ”

“Very true; but, in short, it had not occurred to me. And you know there
is generally an uncle or a grandfather to leave a fortune to the second
son. ”

“A very praiseworthy practice,” said Edmund, “but not quite universal.
I am one of the exceptions, and _being_ one, must do something for
myself. ”

“But why are you to be a clergyman? I thought _that_ was always the lot
of the youngest, where there were many to chuse before him. ”

“Do you think the church itself never chosen, then? ”

“_Never_ is a black word. But yes, in the _never_ of conversation, which
means _not_ _very_ _often_, I do think it. For what is to be done in the
church? Men love to distinguish themselves, and in either of the other
lines distinction may be gained, but not in the church. A clergyman is
nothing. ”

“The _nothing_ of conversation has its gradations, I hope, as well as
the _never_. A clergyman cannot be high in state or fashion. He must
not head mobs, or set the ton in dress. But I cannot call that situation
nothing which has the charge of all that is of the first importance
to mankind, individually or collectively considered, temporally and
eternally, which has the guardianship of religion and morals, and
consequently of the manners which result from their influence. No one
here can call the _office_ nothing. If the man who holds it is so, it
is by the neglect of his duty, by foregoing its just importance, and
stepping out of his place to appear what he ought not to appear. ”

“_You_ assign greater consequence to the clergyman than one has been
used to hear given, or than I can quite comprehend. One does not see
much of this influence and importance in society, and how can it be
acquired where they are so seldom seen themselves? How can two sermons a
week, even supposing them worth hearing, supposing the preacher to have
the sense to prefer Blair’s to his own, do all that you speak of? govern
the conduct and fashion the manners of a large congregation for the rest
of the week? One scarcely sees a clergyman out of his pulpit. ”

“_You_ are speaking of London, _I_ am speaking of the nation at large. ”

“The metropolis, I imagine, is a pretty fair sample of the rest. ”

“Not, I should hope, of the proportion of virtue to vice throughout the
kingdom. We do not look in great cities for our best morality. It is not
there that respectable people of any denomination can do most good; and
it certainly is not there that the influence of the clergy can be most
felt. A fine preacher is followed and admired; but it is not in fine
preaching only that a good clergyman will be useful in his parish and
his neighbourhood, where the parish and neighbourhood are of a size
capable of knowing his private character, and observing his general
conduct, which in London can rarely be the case. The clergy are lost
there in the crowds of their parishioners. They are known to the largest
part only as preachers. And with regard to their influencing public
manners, Miss Crawford must not misunderstand me, or suppose I mean to
call them the arbiters of good-breeding, the regulators of refinement
and courtesy, the masters of the ceremonies of life. The _manners_ I
speak of might rather be called _conduct_, perhaps, the result of good
principles; the effect, in short, of those doctrines which it is their
duty to teach and recommend; and it will, I believe, be everywhere
found, that as the clergy are, or are not what they ought to be, so are
the rest of the nation. ”

“Certainly,” said Fanny, with gentle earnestness.

“There,” cried Miss Crawford, “you have quite convinced Miss Price
already. ”

“I wish I could convince Miss Crawford too. ”

“I do not think you ever will,” said she, with an arch smile; “I am just
as much surprised now as I was at first that you should intend to take
orders. You really are fit for something better. Come, do change your
mind. It is not too late. Go into the law. ”

“Go into the law! With as much ease as I was told to go into this
wilderness. ”

“Now you are going to say something about law being the worst wilderness
of the two, but I forestall you; remember, I have forestalled you. ”

“You need not hurry when the object is only to prevent my saying a
_bon_ _mot_, for there is not the least wit in my nature. I am a very
matter-of-fact, plain-spoken being, and may blunder on the borders of a
repartee for half an hour together without striking it out. ”

A general silence succeeded. Each was thoughtful. Fanny made the first
interruption by saying, “I wonder that I should be tired with only
walking in this sweet wood; but the next time we come to a seat, if it
is not disagreeable to you, I should be glad to sit down for a little
while. ”

“My dear Fanny,” cried Edmund, immediately drawing her arm within his,
“how thoughtless I have been! I hope you are not very tired. Perhaps,”
turning to Miss Crawford, “my other companion may do me the honour of
taking an arm. ”

“Thank you, but I am not at all tired. ” She took it, however, as she
spoke, and the gratification of having her do so, of feeling such a
connexion for the first time, made him a little forgetful of Fanny.
“You scarcely touch me,” said he. “You do not make me of any use. What a
difference in the weight of a woman’s arm from that of a man! At Oxford
I have been a good deal used to have a man lean on me for the length of
a street, and you are only a fly in the comparison. ”

“I am really not tired, which I almost wonder at; for we must have
walked at least a mile in this wood. Do not you think we have? ”

“Not half a mile,” was his sturdy answer; for he was not yet so much in
love as to measure distance, or reckon time, with feminine lawlessness.

“Oh! you do not consider how much we have wound about. We have taken
such a very serpentine course, and the wood itself must be half a mile
long in a straight line, for we have never seen the end of it yet since
we left the first great path. ”

“But if you remember, before we left that first great path, we saw
directly to the end of it. We looked down the whole vista, and saw it
closed by iron gates, and it could not have been more than a furlong in
length. ”

“Oh! I know nothing of your furlongs, but I am sure it is a very long
wood, and that we have been winding in and out ever since we came into
it; and therefore, when I say that we have walked a mile in it, I must
speak within compass. ”

“We have been exactly a quarter of an hour here,” said Edmund, taking
out his watch. “Do you think we are walking four miles an hour? ”

“Oh! do not attack me with your watch. A watch is always too fast or too
slow. I cannot be dictated to by a watch. ”

A few steps farther brought them out at the bottom of the very walk they
had been talking of; and standing back, well shaded and sheltered, and
looking over a ha-ha into the park, was a comfortable-sized bench, on
which they all sat down.

“I am afraid you are very tired, Fanny,” said Edmund, observing her;
“why would not you speak sooner? This will be a bad day’s amusement for
you if you are to be knocked up. Every sort of exercise fatigues her so
soon, Miss Crawford, except riding. ”

“How abominable in you, then, to let me engross her horse as I did all
last week! I am ashamed of you and of myself, but it shall never happen
again. ”

“_Your_ attentiveness and consideration makes me more sensible of my own
neglect. Fanny’s interest seems in safer hands with you than with me. ”

“That she should be tired now, however, gives me no surprise; for there
is nothing in the course of one’s duties so fatiguing as what we have
been doing this morning: seeing a great house, dawdling from one room to
another, straining one’s eyes and one’s attention, hearing what one does
not understand, admiring what one does not care for. It is generally
allowed to be the greatest bore in the world, and Miss Price has found
it so, though she did not know it. ”

“I shall soon be rested,” said Fanny; “to sit in the shade on a fine
day, and look upon verdure, is the most perfect refreshment. ”

After sitting a little while Miss Crawford was up again. “I must move,”
said she; “resting fatigues me. I have looked across the ha-ha till I
am weary. I must go and look through that iron gate at the same view,
without being able to see it so well. ”

Edmund left the seat likewise. “Now, Miss Crawford, if you will look up
the walk, you will convince yourself that it cannot be half a mile long,
or half half a mile. ”

“It is an immense distance,” said she; “I see _that_ with a glance. ”

He still reasoned with her, but in vain. She would not calculate, she
would not compare. She would only smile and assert. The greatest degree
of rational consistency could not have been more engaging, and they
talked with mutual satisfaction. At last it was agreed that they should
endeavour to determine the dimensions of the wood by walking a little
more about it. They would go to one end of it, in the line they were
then in--for there was a straight green walk along the bottom by
the side of the ha-ha--and perhaps turn a little way in some other
direction, if it seemed likely to assist them, and be back in a few
minutes. Fanny said she was rested, and would have moved too, but this
was not suffered. Edmund urged her remaining where she was with an
earnestness which she could not resist, and she was left on the bench to
think with pleasure of her cousin’s care, but with great regret that she
was not stronger. She watched them till they had turned the corner, and
listened till all sound of them had ceased.



CHAPTER X

A quarter of an hour, twenty minutes, passed away, and Fanny was still
thinking of Edmund, Miss Crawford, and herself, without interruption
from any one. She began to be surprised at being left so long, and to
listen with an anxious desire of hearing their steps and their voices
again. She listened, and at length she heard; she heard voices and feet
approaching; but she had just satisfied herself that it was not those
she wanted, when Miss Bertram, Mr. Rushworth, and Mr.
Crawford issued
from the same path which she had trod herself, and were before her.

“Miss Price all alone” and “My dear Fanny, how comes this? ” were the
first salutations. She told her story. “Poor dear Fanny,” cried her
cousin, “how ill you have been used by them! You had better have staid
with us. ”

Then seating herself with a gentleman on each side, she resumed
the conversation which had engaged them before, and discussed the
possibility of improvements with much animation. Nothing was fixed
on; but Henry Crawford was full of ideas and projects, and, generally
speaking, whatever he proposed was immediately approved, first by her,
and then by Mr. Rushworth, whose principal business seemed to be to
hear the others, and who scarcely risked an original thought of his own
beyond a wish that they had seen his friend Smith’s place.

After some minutes spent in this way, Miss Bertram, observing the iron
gate, expressed a wish of passing through it into the park, that their
views and their plans might be more comprehensive. It was the very thing
of all others to be wished, it was the best, it was the only way of
proceeding with any advantage, in Henry Crawford’s opinion; and he
directly saw a knoll not half a mile off, which would give them exactly
the requisite command of the house. Go therefore they must to that
knoll, and through that gate; but the gate was locked. Mr. Rushworth
wished he had brought the key; he had been very near thinking whether he
should not bring the key; he was determined he would never come without
the key again; but still this did not remove the present evil. They
could not get through; and as Miss Bertram’s inclination for so doing
did by no means lessen, it ended in Mr. Rushworth’s declaring outright
that he would go and fetch the key. He set off accordingly.

“It is undoubtedly the best thing we can do now, as we are so far from
the house already,” said Mr. Crawford, when he was gone.

“Yes, there is nothing else to be done. But now, sincerely, do not you
find the place altogether worse than you expected? ”

“No, indeed, far otherwise. I find it better, grander, more complete in
its style, though that style may not be the best. And to tell you the
truth,” speaking rather lower, “I do not think that _I_ shall ever see
Sotherton again with so much pleasure as I do now. Another summer will
hardly improve it to me. ”

After a moment’s embarrassment the lady replied, “You are too much a
man of the world not to see with the eyes of the world. If other people
think Sotherton improved, I have no doubt that you will. ”

“I am afraid I am not quite so much the man of the world as might be
good for me in some points. My feelings are not quite so evanescent, nor
my memory of the past under such easy dominion as one finds to be the
case with men of the world. ”

This was followed by a short silence. Miss Bertram began again. “You
seemed to enjoy your drive here very much this morning. I was glad to
see you so well entertained. You and Julia were laughing the whole way. ”

“Were we? Yes, I believe we were; but I have not the least recollection
at what. Oh! I believe I was relating to her some ridiculous stories of
an old Irish groom of my uncle’s. Your sister loves to laugh. ”

“You think her more light-hearted than I am? ”

“More easily amused,” he replied; “consequently, you know,” smiling,
“better company. I could not have hoped to entertain you with Irish
anecdotes during a ten miles’ drive. ”

“Naturally, I believe, I am as lively as Julia, but I have more to think
of now. ”

“You have, undoubtedly; and there are situations in which very high
spirits would denote insensibility. Your prospects, however, are too
fair to justify want of spirits. You have a very smiling scene before
you. ”

“Do you mean literally or figuratively? Literally, I conclude. Yes,
certainly, the sun shines, and the park looks very cheerful. But
unluckily that iron gate, that ha-ha, give me a feeling of restraint and
hardship. ‘I cannot get out,’ as the starling said. ” As she spoke, and
it was with expression, she walked to the gate: he followed her. “Mr.
Rushworth is so long fetching this key! ”

“And for the world you would not get out without the key and without Mr.
Rushworth’s authority and protection, or I think you might with little
difficulty pass round the edge of the gate, here, with my assistance;
I think it might be done, if you really wished to be more at large, and
could allow yourself to think it not prohibited. ”

“Prohibited! nonsense! I certainly can get out that way, and I will.
Mr. Rushworth will be here in a moment, you know; we shall not be out of
sight. ”

“Or if we are, Miss Price will be so good as to tell him that he will
find us near that knoll: the grove of oak on the knoll. ”

Fanny, feeling all this to be wrong, could not help making an effort to
prevent it. “You will hurt yourself, Miss Bertram,” she cried; “you will
certainly hurt yourself against those spikes; you will tear your gown;
you will be in danger of slipping into the ha-ha. You had better not
go. ”

Her cousin was safe on the other side while these words were spoken,
and, smiling with all the good-humour of success, she said, “Thank you,
my dear Fanny, but I and my gown are alive and well, and so good-bye. ”

Fanny was again left to her solitude, and with no increase of pleasant
feelings, for she was sorry for almost all that she had seen and heard,
astonished at Miss Bertram, and angry with Mr. Crawford. By taking
a circuitous route, and, as it appeared to her, very unreasonable
direction to the knoll, they were soon beyond her eye; and for some
minutes longer she remained without sight or sound of any companion.
She seemed to have the little wood all to herself. She could almost
have thought that Edmund and Miss Crawford had left it, but that it was
impossible for Edmund to forget her so entirely.

She was again roused from disagreeable musings by sudden footsteps:
somebody was coming at a quick pace down the principal walk. She
expected Mr. Rushworth, but it was Julia, who, hot and out of breath,
and with a look of disappointment, cried out on seeing her, “Heyday!
Where are the others? I thought Maria and Mr. Crawford were with you. ”

Fanny explained.

“A pretty trick, upon my word! I cannot see them anywhere,” looking
eagerly into the park. “But they cannot be very far off, and I think I
am equal to as much as Maria, even without help. ”

“But, Julia, Mr. Rushworth will be here in a moment with the key. Do
wait for Mr. Rushworth. ”

“Not I, indeed. I have had enough of the family for one morning. Why,
child, I have but this moment escaped from his horrible mother. Such a
penance as I have been enduring, while you were sitting here so composed
and so happy! It might have been as well, perhaps, if you had been in my
place, but you always contrive to keep out of these scrapes. ”

This was a most unjust reflection, but Fanny could allow for it, and let
it pass: Julia was vexed, and her temper was hasty; but she felt that it
would not last, and therefore, taking no notice, only asked her if she
had not seen Mr. Rushworth.

“Yes, yes, we saw him. He was posting away as if upon life and death,
and could but just spare time to tell us his errand, and where you all
were. ”

“It is a pity he should have so much trouble for nothing. ”

“_That_ is Miss Maria’s concern. I am not obliged to punish myself for
_her_ sins. The mother I could not avoid, as long as my tiresome aunt
was dancing about with the housekeeper, but the son I _can_ get away
from. ”

And she immediately scrambled across the fence, and walked away, not
attending to Fanny’s last question of whether she had seen anything of
Miss Crawford and Edmund. The sort of dread in which Fanny now sat of
seeing Mr. Rushworth prevented her thinking so much of their continued
absence, however, as she might have done. She felt that he had been
very ill-used, and was quite unhappy in having to communicate what had
passed. He joined her within five minutes after Julia’s exit; and
though she made the best of the story, he was evidently mortified and
displeased in no common degree. At first he scarcely said anything; his
looks only expressed his extreme surprise and vexation, and he walked to
the gate and stood there, without seeming to know what to do.

“They desired me to stay--my cousin Maria charged me to say that you
would find them at that knoll, or thereabouts. ”

“I do not believe I shall go any farther,” said he sullenly; “I see
nothing of them. By the time I get to the knoll they may be gone
somewhere else. I have had walking enough. ”

And he sat down with a most gloomy countenance by Fanny.

“I am very sorry,” said she; “it is very unlucky. ” And she longed to be
able to say something more to the purpose.

After an interval of silence, “I think they might as well have staid for
me,” said he.

“Miss Bertram thought you would follow her. ”

“I should not have had to follow her if she had staid. ”

This could not be denied, and Fanny was silenced. After another pause,
he went on--“Pray, Miss Price, are you such a great admirer of this Mr.
Crawford as some people are? For my part, I can see nothing in him. ”

“I do not think him at all handsome. ”

“Handsome! Nobody can call such an undersized man handsome. He is not
five foot nine. I should not wonder if he is not more than five foot
eight. I think he is an ill-looking fellow. In my opinion, these
Crawfords are no addition at all. We did very well without them. ”

A small sigh escaped Fanny here, and she did not know how to contradict
him.

“If I had made any difficulty about fetching the key, there might have
been some excuse, but I went the very moment she said she wanted it. ”

“Nothing could be more obliging than your manner, I am sure, and I dare
say you walked as fast as you could; but still it is some distance, you
know, from this spot to the house, quite into the house; and when people
are waiting, they are bad judges of time, and every half minute seems
like five. ”

He got up and walked to the gate again, and “wished he had had the key
about him at the time. ” Fanny thought she discerned in his standing
there an indication of relenting, which encouraged her to another
attempt, and she said, therefore, “It is a pity you should not join
them. They expected to have a better view of the house from that part
of the park, and will be thinking how it may be improved; and nothing of
that sort, you know, can be settled without you. ”

She found herself more successful in sending away than in retaining a
companion. Mr. Rushworth was worked on. “Well,” said he, “if you
really think I had better go: it would be foolish to bring the key
for nothing. ” And letting himself out, he walked off without farther
ceremony.

Fanny’s thoughts were now all engrossed by the two who had left her so
long ago, and getting quite impatient, she resolved to go in search
of them. She followed their steps along the bottom walk, and had just
turned up into another, when the voice and the laugh of Miss Crawford
once more caught her ear; the sound approached, and a few more windings
brought them before her. They were just returned into the wilderness
from the park, to which a sidegate, not fastened, had tempted them very
soon after their leaving her, and they had been across a portion of the
park into the very avenue which Fanny had been hoping the whole morning
to reach at last, and had been sitting down under one of the trees. This
was their history. It was evident that they had been spending their time
pleasantly, and were not aware of the length of their absence. Fanny’s
best consolation was in being assured that Edmund had wished for her
very much, and that he should certainly have come back for her, had she
not been tired already; but this was not quite sufficient to do away
with the pain of having been left a whole hour, when he had talked of
only a few minutes, nor to banish the sort of curiosity she felt to know
what they had been conversing about all that time; and the result of
the whole was to her disappointment and depression, as they prepared by
general agreement to return to the house.

On reaching the bottom of the steps to the terrace, Mrs. Rushworth
and Mrs. Norris presented themselves at the top, just ready for the
wilderness, at the end of an hour and a half from their leaving the
house. Mrs. Norris had been too well employed to move faster. Whatever
cross-accidents had occurred to intercept the pleasures of her nieces,
she had found a morning of complete enjoyment; for the housekeeper,
after a great many courtesies on the subject of pheasants, had taken her
to the dairy, told her all about their cows, and given her the receipt
for a famous cream cheese; and since Julia’s leaving them they had
been met by the gardener, with whom she had made a most satisfactory
acquaintance, for she had set him right as to his grandson’s illness,
convinced him that it was an ague, and promised him a charm for it; and
he, in return, had shewn her all his choicest nursery of plants, and
actually presented her with a very curious specimen of heath.

On this _rencontre_ they all returned to the house together, there
to lounge away the time as they could with sofas, and chit-chat, and
Quarterly Reviews, till the return of the others, and the arrival of
dinner. It was late before the Miss Bertrams and the two gentlemen came
in, and their ramble did not appear to have been more than partially
agreeable, or at all productive of anything useful with regard to the
object of the day. By their own accounts they had been all walking after
each other, and the junction which had taken place at last seemed, to
Fanny’s observation, to have been as much too late for re-establishing
harmony, as it confessedly had been for determining on any alteration.
She felt, as she looked at Julia and Mr. Rushworth, that hers was not
the only dissatisfied bosom amongst them: there was gloom on the face of
each. Mr. Crawford and Miss Bertram were much more gay, and she thought
that he was taking particular pains, during dinner, to do away any
little resentment of the other two, and restore general good-humour.

Dinner was soon followed by tea and coffee, a ten miles’ drive home
allowed no waste of hours; and from the time of their sitting down to
table, it was a quick succession of busy nothings till the carriage came
to the door, and Mrs. Norris, having fidgeted about, and obtained a
few pheasants’ eggs and a cream cheese from the housekeeper, and made
abundance of civil speeches to Mrs. Rushworth, was ready to lead the
way. At the same moment Mr. Crawford, approaching Julia, said, “I hope I
am not to lose my companion, unless she is afraid of the evening air
in so exposed a seat. ” The request had not been foreseen, but was very
graciously received, and Julia’s day was likely to end almost as well as
it began. Miss Bertram had made up her mind to something different, and
was a little disappointed; but her conviction of being really the
one preferred comforted her under it, and enabled her to receive Mr.
Rushworth’s parting attentions as she ought. He was certainly better
pleased to hand her into the barouche than to assist her in ascending
the box, and his complacency seemed confirmed by the arrangement.

“Well, Fanny, this has been a fine day for you, upon my word,” said
Mrs. Norris, as they drove through the park. “Nothing but pleasure from
beginning to end! I am sure you ought to be very much obliged to your
aunt Bertram and me for contriving to let you go. A pretty good day’s
amusement you have had! ”

Maria was just discontented enough to say directly, “I think _you_ have
done pretty well yourself, ma’am. Your lap seems full of good things,
and here is a basket of something between us which has been knocking my
elbow unmercifully. ”

“My dear, it is only a beautiful little heath, which that nice old
gardener would make me take; but if it is in your way, I will have it in
my lap directly. There, Fanny, you shall carry that parcel for me; take
great care of it: do not let it fall; it is a cream cheese, just like
the excellent one we had at dinner. Nothing would satisfy that good old
Mrs. Whitaker, but my taking one of the cheeses. I stood out as long
as I could, till the tears almost came into her eyes, and I knew it was
just the sort that my sister would be delighted with. That Mrs. Whitaker
is a treasure! She was quite shocked when I asked her whether wine was
allowed at the second table, and she has turned away two housemaids for
wearing white gowns. Take care of the cheese, Fanny. Now I can manage
the other parcel and the basket very well. ”

“What else have you been spunging? ” said Maria, half-pleased that
Sotherton should be so complimented.

“Spunging, my dear! It is nothing but four of those beautiful pheasants’
eggs, which Mrs. Whitaker would quite force upon me: she would not take
a denial. She said it must be such an amusement to me, as she understood
I lived quite alone, to have a few living creatures of that sort; and
so to be sure it will. I shall get the dairymaid to set them under the
first spare hen, and if they come to good I can have them moved to my
own house and borrow a coop; and it will be a great delight to me in
my lonely hours to attend to them. And if I have good luck, your mother
shall have some. ”

It was a beautiful evening, mild and still, and the drive was as
pleasant as the serenity of Nature could make it; but when Mrs. Norris
ceased speaking, it was altogether a silent drive to those within. Their
spirits were in general exhausted; and to determine whether the day had
afforded most pleasure or pain, might occupy the meditations of almost
all.



CHAPTER XI

The day at Sotherton, with all its imperfections, afforded the Miss
Bertrams much more agreeable feelings than were derived from the letters
from Antigua, which soon afterwards reached Mansfield. It was much
pleasanter to think of Henry Crawford than of their father; and to think
of their father in England again within a certain period, which these
letters obliged them to do, was a most unwelcome exercise.

November was the black month fixed for his return. Sir Thomas wrote of
it with as much decision as experience and anxiety could authorise. His
business was so nearly concluded as to justify him in proposing to take
his passage in the September packet, and he consequently looked forward
with the hope of being with his beloved family again early in November.

Maria was more to be pitied than Julia; for to her the father brought a
husband, and the return of the friend most solicitous for her happiness
would unite her to the lover, on whom she had chosen that happiness
should depend. It was a gloomy prospect, and all she could do was to
throw a mist over it, and hope when the mist cleared away she should
see something else. It would hardly be _early_ in November, there
were generally delays, a bad passage or _something_; that favouring
_something_ which everybody who shuts their eyes while they look, or
their understandings while they reason, feels the comfort of.