Your
mamma, in the kindness of her heart, made me see doctors, and
sent me to a hospital.
mamma, in the kindness of her heart, made me see doctors, and
sent me to a hospital.
Warner - World's Best Literature - v26 to v30 - Tur to Zor and Index
The Gabbler at last was swinging his legs, tapping
with his feet and twitching his shoulder; while Yashka's eyes
fairly glowed like coals, and he trembled all over like a leaf, and
smiled nervously. The Wild Master alone did not change counte-
nance, and stood motionless as before; but his eyes, fastened on
the booth-keeper, looked somewhat softened, though the expression
of his lips was still scornful. Emboldened by the signs of general
approbation, the booth-keeper went off in a whirl of flourishes;
and began to round off such trills, to turn such shakes off his
tongue, and to make such furious play with his throat, that when
at last, pale, exhausted, and bathed in hot perspiration, he uttered
the last dying note, his whole body flung back, a general united
shout greeted him in a violent outburst. The Gabbler threw
himself on his neck, and began strangling him in his long bony.
arms; a flush came out on Nikolai Ivan’itch's oily face, and he
seemed to have grown younger; Yashka shouted like mad, “Cap.
ital, capital! ” Even my neighbor, the peasant in the torn smock,
could not restrain himself; and with a blow of his fist on the
table he cried, "Aha! well done, damn my soul, well done! »
And he spat on one side with an air of decision.
"Well, brother, you've given us a treat! ” bawled the Gabbler,
not releasing the exhausted booth-keeper from his embraces;
"you've given us a treat, there's no denying! You've won, brother,
you've won! I congratulate you — the quart's yours! Yashka's
miles behind you, I tell you; miles — take my word for it. ”
And
again he hugged the booth-keeper to his breast.
“There, let him alone, let him alone; there's no being rid of
you,” said the Blinkard with vexation; let him sit down on the
bench; he's tired, see. - You're a ninny, brother, a perfect ninny!
-
What are you sticking to him like a wet leaf for? ”
“Well, then, let him sit down, and I'll drink to his health,”
said the Gabbler, and he went up to the bar. “At your expense,
brother,” he added, addressing the booth-keeper.
»
## p. 15114 (#50) ###########################################
15114
IVAN TURGENEFF
The latter nodded, sat down on the bench, pulled a piece of
cloth out of his cap, and began wiping his face; while the Gab-
bler, with greedy haste, emptied his glass, and with a grunt,
assumed, after the manner of confirmed drinkers, an expression
of careworn melancholy.
“You sing beautifully, brother, beautifully,” Nikolai Ivan'itch
observed caressingly. “And now it's your turn, Yashka; mind,
now, don't be afraid. We shall see who's who; we shall see.
The booth-keeper sings beautifully, though; 'pon my soul, he
does. ”
“Very beautifully,” observed Nikolai Ivan’itch's wife, and she
looked with a smile at Yakov.
“Beautifully, ha! ” repeated my neighbor in an undertone.
“Ah, a wild man of the woods! ” the Gabbler vociferated sud-
denly; and going up to the peasant with the rent on his shoulder,
he pointed at him with his finger, while he pranced about and
went off into an insulting guffaw. "Ha! ha! get along! wild
man of the woods! Here's a ragamuffin from Woodland village!
What brought you here ? ” he bawled amidst laughter.
The poor peasant was abashed, and was just about to get up
and make off as fast as he could, when suddenly the Wild Master's
iron voice was heard :
« What does the insufferable brute mean? ” he articulated,
grinding his teeth.
"I wasn't doing nothing," muttered the Gabbler. “I didn't-
I only — "
“There, all right, shut up! ” retorted the Wild Master. “Yakov,
begin ! »
Yakov took himself by his throat:
“–
"Well, really, brothers - Something - H'm, I don't know,
on my word, what — »
“Come, that's enough; don't be timid. For shame! why go
back? Sing the best you can, by God's gift. ”
And the Wild Master looked down expectant. Yakov was
silent for a minute; he glanced round, and covered his face with
his hand. All had their eyes simply fastened upon him; especially
the booth-keeper, on whose face a faint, involuntary uneasiness
could be seen through his habitual expression of self-confidence
and the triumph of his success. He leant back against the wall,
and again put both hands under him, but did not swing his legs
as before. When at last Yakov uncovered his face, it was pale
as a dead man's; his eyes gleamed faintly under their drooping
(
## p. 15115 (#51) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15115
((
lashes. He gave a deep sigh, and began to sing. The first
sound of his voice was faint and unequal, and seemed not to
come from his chest, but to be wafted from somewhere afar off,
as though it had floated by chance into the room. A strange
effect was produced on all of us by this trembling, resonant note:
we glanced at one another, and Nikolai Ivan'itch's wife seemed to
draw herself up. This first note was followed by another, bolder
and prolonged, but still obviously quivering - like a harpstring,
when, suddenly struck by a stray finger, it throbs in a last swiftly
dying tremble; the second was followed by a third; and gradually
gaining fire and breadth, the strains swelled into a pathetic
melody.
“Not one little path ran into the field,” he sang; and sweet
and mournful it was in our ears. I have seldom, I must con-
fess, heard a voice like it: it was slightly hoarse, and not per-
fectly true; there was even something morbid about it at first:
but it had genuine depth of passion, and youth and sweetness,
and a sort of fascinating, careless, pathetic melancholy. A spirit
of truth and fire, a Russian spirit, was sounding and breathing
in that voice; and it seemed to go straight to your heart, - to
go straight to all that was Russian in it. The song swelled and
flowed. Yakov was clearly carried away by enthusiasm: he was
not timid now; he surrendered himself wholly to the rapture of
his art: his voice no longer trembled; it quivered, but with the
scarce perceptible inward quiver of passion, which pierces like an
arrow to the very soul of the listeners: and he steadily gained
strength and firmness and breadth. I remember I once saw at
sunset on a flat sandy shore, when the tide was low and the sea's
roar came weighty and menacing from the distance, a great white
sea-gull; it sat motionless, its silky bosom facing the crimson
glow of the setting sun, and only now and then opening wide
its great wings to greet the well-known sea, to greet the sinking
lurid sun: I recalled it, as I heard Yakov. He sang, utterly for-
getful of his rival and all of us; he seemed supported, as a bold
swimmer by the waves, by our silent, passionate sympathy. He
sang, and in every sound of his voice one seemed to feel some-
thing dear and akin to us; something of breadth and space, as
though the familiar steppes were unfolding before our eyes and
stretching away into endless distance.
I felt the tears gathering in my bosom and rising to my eyes;
suddenly I was struck by dull, smothered sobs. I looked round;
## p. 15116 (#52) ###########################################
15116
IVAN TURGENEFF
(
the innkeeper's wife was weeping, her bosom pressed close to
the window. Yakov threw a quick glance at her, and he sang
more sweetly, more melodiously than ever; Nikolai Ivan'itch
looked down; the Blinkard turned away; the Gabbler, quite
touched, stood, his gaping mouth stupidly open; the humble peas-
ant was sobbing softly in the corner, and shaking his head with
a plaintive murmur; on the iron visage of the Wild Master,
from under his overhanging brows, there slowly rolled a heavy
tear; the booth-keeper raised his clenched fist to his brow, and
did not stir. I don't know how the general emotion would have
ended, if Yakov had not come to a full stop on a high, excep-
tionally shrill note—as though his voice had broken.
No one
called out, or even stirred: every one seemed to be waiting to
see whether he was not going to sing more; but he opened his
eyes as though wondering at our silence, looked round at all of
us with a face of inquiry, and saw that the victory was his.
“Yasha,” said the Wild Master, laying his hand on his shoul-
der — and he could say no more.
We all stood, as it were, petrified. The booth-keeper softly
rose and went up to Yakov.
“You — yours — you've won,” he articulated at last with an
effort; and rushed out of the room. His rapid, decided action, as
it were, broke the spell: we all suddenly fell into noisy, delighted
talk. The Gabbler bounded up and down, stammered, and brand-
ished his arms like mill sails; the Blinkard limped up to Yakov
and began kissing him; Nikolai Ivan'itch got up and solemnly
announced that he would add a second pot of beer from himself.
The Wild Master laughed a sort of kind, simple laugh, which I
should never have expected to see on his face; the humble peas-
ant, as he wiped his eyes, cheeks, nose, and beard on his sleeves,
kept repeating in his corner, "Ah, beautiful it was, by God!
blast me for the son of a dog, but it was fine! ” while Nikolai
Ivan'itch's wife, her face red with weeping, got up quickly and
went away. Yakov was enjoying his triumph like a child: his
whole face was transformed, his eyes especially fairly glowed
with happiness. They dragged him to the bar; he beckoned the
weeping peasant up to it, and sent the innkeeper's little son
to look after the booth-keeper, who was not found, however: and
the festivities began. “You'll sing to us again; you're going to
sing to us till evening,” the Gabbler declared, flourishing his
hands in the air.
((
## p. 15117 (#53) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15117
I took one more look at Yakov, and went out. I did not
want to stay - I was afraid of spoiling the impression I had
received. But the heat was as insupportable as before. It
seemed hanging in a thick, heavy layer right over the earth;
over the dark-blue sky, tiny bright fires seemed whisking through
the finest, almost black dust. Everything was still; and there
was something hopeless and oppressive in this profound hush of
exhausted nature. I made my way to a hay-loft, and lay down
on the fresh-cut but already almost dry grass. For a long while
I could not go to sleep; for a long while Yakov's irresistible
yoice was ringing in my ears. At last the heat and fatigue
regained their sway, however, and I fell into a dead sleep.
When I waked up, everything was in darkness: the hay scattered
around smelt strong and was slightly damp; through the slender
rafters of the half-open roof, pale stars were faintly twinkling.
I went out. The glow of sunset had long died away, and
its last trace showed in a faint light on the horizon; but above
the freshness of the night there was still a feeling of heat in
the atmosphere, lately baked through by the sun, and the breast
still craved a draught of cool air. There was no wind, nor
were there any clouds; the sky all round was clear and transpar-
ently dark, softly glimmering with innumerable but scarcely visible
stars,
There were lights twinkling about the village; from the flar-
ing tavern close by rose a confused, discordant din, amid which
I fancied I recognized the voice of Yakov. Violent laughter
came from there in an outburst at times. I went up to the
little window and pressed my face against the pane. I saw a
cheerless, though varied and animated scene. All were drunk
all from Yakov upwards. With breast bared, he sat on a bench,
and singing in a thick voice a street song to a dance-tune, he
lazily fingered and strummed on the strings of a guitar. His
moist hair hung in tufts over his fearfully pale face. In the
middle of the room, the Gabbler, completely "screwed” and
”
without his coat, was hopping about in a dance before the
peasant in the gray smock: the peasant, on his side, was with
difficulty stamping and scraping with his feet, and grinning
meaninglessly over his disheveled beard; he waved one hand
from time to time, as much as to say, Here goes! ”
Nothing
could be more ludicrous than his face; however much he twitched
up his eyebrows, his heavy lids would hardly rise, but seemed
## p. 15118 (#54) ###########################################
15118
IVAN TURGENEFF
He was
lying upon his scarcely visible, dim, and mawkish eyes.
in that amiable frame of mind of a perfectly intoxicated man,
when every passer-by, directly he looks him in the face, is sure
to say, "Bless you, brother, bless you! ” The Blinkard, as red as
a lobster, and his nostrils dilated wide, was laughing malignantly
in a corner; only Nikolai Ivan’itch, as befits a good tavern-keeper,
preserved his composure unchanged.
The room was thronged
with many new faces; but the Wild Master I did not see in it.
I turned away with rapid steps, and began descending the
hill on which Kolotovka lies. At the foot of this hill stretches a
wide plain; plunged in the misty waves of the evening haze, it
seemed more immense, and was, as it were, merged in the dark-
ening sky. I walked with long strides along the road by the
ravine, when all at once from somewhere far away in the plain
came a boy's clear voice: "Antropka! Antropka-a-a! ” He shouted
in obstinate and tearful desperation, with long, long drawing out
of the last syllable.
He was silent for a few instants, and started shouting again.
His voice rang out clear in the still, lightly slumbering air.
Thirty times at least he had called the name Antropka; when
suddenly, from the farthest end of the plain, as though from
another world, there floated a scarcely audible reply:-
“Wha-a-t? ”
The boy's voice shouted back at once with gleeful exaspera-
tion:
«Come here, devil! woo-od imp!
«What fo-or? ” replied the other, after a long interval.
“Because dad wants to thrash you! ” the first voice shouted
back hurriedly.
The second voice did not call back again, and the boy fell to
shouting "Antropka” once more. His cries, fainter and less and
less frequent, still floated up to my ears, when it had grown
completely dark, and I had turned the corner of the wood which
skirts my village, and lies over three miles from Kolotovka.
"Antropka-a-a! ) was still audible in the air, filled with the
shadows of night.
>
## p. 15119 (#55) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15119
A LIVING RELIC
From A Sportsman's Sketches)
T
>
He same day we made our way to my mother's peasant set-
tlement,- the existence of which, I must confess, I had not
even suspected till then. At this settlement, it turned out,
there was a little lodge. It was very old, but as it had not been
inhabited, it was clean: I passed a fairly tranquil night in it.
The next day I woke up very early. The sun had only just
risen; there was not a single cloud in the sky; everything around
shone with a double brilliance, - the brightness of the fresh
morning rays and of yesterday's downpour. While they were
harnessing me a cart, I went for a stroll about a small orchard,
now neglected and run wild, which inclosed the little lodge on
all sides with its fragrant, sappy growth. Ah, how sweet it was
in the open air, under the bright sky, where the larks were trill-
ing, whence their bell-like notes rained down like silvery beads!
On their wings, doubtless, they had carried off drops of dew, and
their songs seemed steeped in dew. I took my cap off my head
and drew a glad deep breath. On the slope of a shallow ravine,
close to the hedge, could be seen a beehive; a narrow path led
to it, winding like a snake between dense walls of high grass and
nettles, above which struggled up, God knows whence brought,
the pointed stalks of dark-green hemp.
I turned along this path; I reached the beehive. Beside it
stood a little wattled shanty, where they put the beehives for the
winter. I peeped into the half-open door: it was dark, still, dry,
within; there was a scent of mint and balm. In the corner were
some trestles fitted together, and on them, covered with a quilt,
a little figure of some sort. I was walking away —
« Master, master! Piotr Petrovitch! ” I heard a voice, faint,
slow, and hoarse, like the whispering of marsh rushes.
I stopped.
Piotr Petrovitch! Come in, please! ” the voice repeated. It
came from the corner where were the trestles I had noticed.
I drew near, and was struck dumb with amazement. Before
me lay a living human being; but what sort of a creature was
it ?
A head utterly withered, of a uniform coppery hue- like
some very ancient holy picture, yellow with age; a sharp nose
## p. 15120 (#56) ###########################################
15120
IVAN TURGENEFF
like a keen-edged knife; the lips could barely be seen - only the
teeth flashed white, and the eyes; and from under the kerchief
some thin wisps of yellow hair straggled on to the forehead. At
the chin, where the quilt was folded, two tiny hands of the same
coppery hue were moving, the fingers slowly twitching like little
sticks. I looked more intently: the face, far from being ugly,
was positively beautiful, but strange and dreadful; and the face
seemed the more dreadful to me that on it, on its metallic cheeks,
I saw struggling -- struggling and unable to form itself - a smile.
a
“ You don't recognize me, master ? ” whispered the voice
again: it seemed to be breathed from the almost unmoving lips.
"And indeed, how should you ? I'm Lukerya. Do you remem-
ber who used to lead the dance at your mother's, at Spasskoye ?
Do you remember I used to be leader of the choir too ? ”
«Lukerya! ” I cried. "Is it you? Can it be? ”
"
“Yes, it's I, master - I, Lukerya. ”
I did not know what to say, and gazed in stupefaction at
the dark motionless face, with the clear, death-like eyes . fastened
upon me.
Was it possible ? This mummy Lukerya — the great-
est beauty in all our household - that tall, plump, pink-and-white,
singing, laughing, dancing creature! Lukerya, our smart Lu-
kerya, whom all our lads were courting, for whom I heaved some
secret sighs — I, a boy of sixteen!
“Mercy, Lukerya! ” I said at last: “what is it has happened
to you? ”
Oh, such a misfortune befell me! But don't mind me, sir;
don't let my trouble revolt you: sit there on that little tub;
little nearer, or you won't be able to hear me. I've not much of
a voice nowadays! Well, I am glad to see you! What brought
you to Aleksyevka ? ”
Lukerya spoke very softly and feebly, but without pausing.
“Yermolaï the huntsman brought me here. But you tell
»
a
>
me
(
me
– six or
“Tell you about my trouble? Certainly, sir. It happened to
a long while ago now
seven years. I had only
just been betrothed then to Vassily Polyakov — do you remember,
such a fine-looking fellow he was, with curly hair ? -- he waited
at table at your mother's. But you weren't in the country then;
you had gone away to Moscow to your studies. We were very
much in love, Vassily and me; I could never get him out of
my head: and it was in the spring it all happened. Well, one
## p. 15121 (#57) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15121
sir. »
night - not long before sunrise, it was — I couldn't sleep: a night-
-
ingale in the garden was singing so wonderfully sweet! I could
not help getting up and going out on to the steps to listen. It
trilled and trilled; and all at once I fancied some one called me
—it seemed like Vassya's voice — so softly: Lusha! ' I looked
round; and being half asleep, I suppose, I missed my footing and
fell straight down from the top step, and flop on to the ground !
And I thought I wasn't much hurt, for I got up directly and
went back to my room. Only it seems something inside me
in my body — was broken.
Let me get my breath — half a
minute
Lukerya ceased, and I looked at her with surprise. What sur-
prised me particularly was that she told her story almost cheer-
fully, without sighs and groans, not complaining nor asking for
sympathy.
'Ever since that happened,” Lukerya went on, "I began to
pine away and get thin; my skin got dark; walking was diffi-
cult for me; and then - I lost the use of my legs altogether,
- ;
I couldn't stand or sit; I had to lie down all the time. And
I didn't care to eat or drink: I got worse and worse.
Your
mamma, in the kindness of her heart, made me see doctors, and
sent me to a hospital. But there was no curing me. And not
one doctor could even say what my illness was. What didn't
they do to me? — they burnt my spine with hot irons, they put
me in lumps of ice, and it was all no good. I got quite numb
in the end. So the gentlemen decided it was no use doctoring
me any more, and there was no sense in keeping cripples up at
the great house; well, and so they sent me here — because I've
relations here. So here I live, as you see. ”
Lukerya was silent again, and again she tried to smile.
“But this is awful — your position! ” I cried; and not knowing
-
how to go on, I asked, "and what of Vassily Polyakov ? A most
stupid question it was.
Lukerya turned her eyes a little away.
"What of Polyakov ? He grieved — he grieved for a bit -
and he is married to another, a girl from Glinnoe.
know Glinnoe ? It's not far from us. Her name's Agrafena.
He loved me dearly — but you see, he's a young man: he could-
n't stay a bachelor. And what sort of a helpmeet could I be?
The wife he found for himself is a good, sweet woman — and they
have children. He lives here; he's a clerk at a neighbor's; your
XXVI-946
(
Do you
## p. 15122 (#58) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
151 22
»
mamma let him go off with a passport, and he's doing very well,
praise God. ”
"And so you go on lying here all the time? ” I asked again.
“Yes, sir, I've been lying here seven years.
In the summer-
time I lie here in this shanty, and when it gets cold they move
me out into the bath-house: I lie there. "
« Who waits on you ? Does any one look after you ? »
“Oh, there are kind folks here as everywhere; they don't
desert me. Yes, they see to me a little. As to food, I eat
nothing to speak of: but water is here in the pitcher; it's always
kept full of pure spring water.
I can
reach to the pitcher
myself: I've one arm still of use. There's a little girl here, an
orphan; now and then she comes to see me, the kind child. She
was here just now. You didn't meet her ? Such a pretty, fair
little thing. She brings me flowers. We've some in the garden
- there were some, but they've all disappeared. But you know,
wild flowers too are nice; they smell even sweeter than garden
Howers. Lilies of the valley, now — what could be sweeter ? »
"And aren't you dull and miserable, my poor Lukerya ? "
“Why, what is one to do? I wouldn't tell a lie about it. At
first it was very wearisome: but later on I got used to it, I got
more patient - it was nothing; there are others worse off still. ”
How do you mean? ”
Why, some haven't a roof to shelter them, and there are
some blind or deaf; while I, thank God, have splendid sight, and
hear everything - everything. If a mole burrows in the ground
-I hear even that. And I can smell every scent, even the
faintest! When the buckwheat comes into flower in the meadow,
or the lime-tree in the garden - I don't need to be told of it,
even; I'm the first to know directly. Anyway, if there's the least
bit of a wind blowing from that quarter. No, he who stirs God's
wrath is far worse off than me. Look at this, again: any one
in health may easily fall into sin; but I'm cut off even from sin.
The other day, Father Aleksy, the priest, came to give me the
sacrament, and he says, “There's no need,' says he, (to confess
you: you can't fall into sin in your condition, can you ? ' But I
said to him, How about sinning in thought, father? Ah, well,
says he, and he laughed himself, that's no great sin. ' But I
fancy I'm no great sinner even in that way, in thought,” Lukerya
went on; "for I've trained myself not to think, and above all,
not to remember. The time goes faster. ”
(
((
## p. 15123 (#59) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15123
his gun.
I must own I was astonished. “You're always alone, Lukerya:
how can you prevent the thoughts from coming into your head ?
or are you constantly asleep? "
" «Oh, no, sir! I can't always sleep. Though I've no great
pain, still I've an ache, there, - right inside, - and in my bones
too; it won't let me sleep as I ought. No; but there, I lie by
myself; I lie here and lie here, and don't think: I feel that
I'm alive, I breathe; and I put myself all into that. I look and
listen. The bees buzz and hum in the hive; a dove sits on the
roof and cooes; a hen comes along with her chickens to peck
up crumbs; or a sparrow Aies in, or a butterfly — that's a great
treat for me. Last year some swallows even built a nest over
there in the corner, and brought up their little ones.
Oh, how
interesting it was! One would fly to the nest, press close, feed
a young one, and off again. Look again: the other would be in
her place already. Sometimes it wouldn't fly in, but only fly
past the open door; and the little ones would begin to squawk,
and open their beaks directly. I was hoping for them back again
the next year, but they say a sportsman here shot them with
And what could he gain by it? It's hardly bigger, the
swallow, than a beetle. What wicked men you are, you sports-
men! »
"I don't shoot swallows," I hastened to remark.
"And once,” Lukerya began again, "it was comical, really.
A hare ran in; it did, really! The hounds, I suppose, were after
it; anyway, it seemed to tumble straight in at the door! It
squatted quite near me, and sat so a long while; it kept sniffing
with its nose, and twitching its whiskers - like a regular officer!
and it looked at me. It understood, to be sure, that I was no
danger to it. At last it got up, went hop-hop to the door, looked
round in the doorway; and what did it look like? Such a funny
fellow it was! »
Lukerya glanced at me, as much as to say, “Wasn't it funny? ”
To satisfy her, I laughed. She moistened her parched lips.
"Well, in the winter, of course, I'm worse off, because it's
dark: to burn a candle would be a pity, and what would be the
use? I can read, to be sure, and was always fond of reading;
but what could I read? There are no books of any kind; and
even if there were, how could I hold a book ? Father Aleksy
brought me a calendar to entertain me; but he saw it was no
good, so he took and carried it away again. But even though
## p. 15124 (#60) ###########################################
15124
IVAN TURGENEFF
a
So we
it's dark, there's always something to listen to: a cricket chirps,
or a mouse begins scratching somewhere. That's when it's a
good thing - not to think! -
“And I repeat the prayers too,” Lukerya went on, after taking
breath a little; "only I don't know many of them — the prayers,
I mean. And besides, why should I weary the Lord God? What
can I ask him for ? He knows better than I what I need. He
has laid a cross upon me: that means that he loves me.
are commanded to understand. I repeat the Lord's Prayer, the
Hymn to the Virgin, the Supplication of all the Afflicted, and I
lie still again, without any thought at all, and am all right! ”
Two minutes passed by. I did not break the silence, and did
not stir on the narrow tub which served me as a seat. The cruel
stony stillness of the living, unlucky creature lying before me
communicated itself to me; I too turned, as it were, numb.
“Listen, Lukerya,” I began at last; “listen to the suggestion
I'm going to make to you. Would you like me to arrange for
them to take you to a hospital — a good hospital in the town?
Who knows - perhaps you might yet be cured; anyway, you
would not be alone. ”
Lukerya's eyebrows fluttered faintly. Oh, no, sir,” she an-
swered in a troubled whisper: “don't move me into a hospital;
don't touch me. I shall only have more agony to bear there!
How could they cure me now? Why, there was a doctor came
here once; he wanted to examine me. I begged him for Christ's
sake not to disturb me.
He began turning
me over, pounding my hands and legs, and pulling me about.
He said, 'I'm doing this for science; I'm a servant of science
a scientific man! And you,' he said, really oughtn't to oppose
me, because I've a medal given me for my labors, and it's for
you simpletons I'm toiling. He mauled me about, told me the
name of my disease some wonderful long name and with that
he went away; and all my poor bones ached for a week after.
You say I'm all alone; always alone. Oh, no, I'm not always:
they come to see I'm quiet - I don't bother them. The
peasant girls come in and chat a bit; a pilgrim woman will
wander in, and tell me tales of Jerusalem, of Kiev, of the holy
towns. And I'm not afraid of being alone. Indeed, it's better
ay, ay! Master, don't touch me, don't take me to the hospi-
tal. Thank you, you are kind: only don't touch me, there's a
dear! ”
((
It was
no
use,
me.
## p. 15125 (#61) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15125
»
C
“Well, as you like, as you like, Lukerya. You know I only
suggested it for your good. ”
"I know, master, that it was for my good. But master dear,
who can help another? Who can enter into his soul ? Every
man must help himself! -You won't believe me, perhaps: I lie
here sometimes so alone; and it's as though there were no one
else in the world but me. As if I alone were living! And it
seems to me as though something were blessing me. I'm carried
away by dreams that are really marvelous ! »
« What do you dream of, then, Lukerya ? ”
« That too, master, I couldn't say: one can't explain. Besides,
one forgets afterwards. It's like a cloud coming over and burst-
ing; then it grows so fresh and sweet: but just what it was,
there's no knowing! Only my idea is, if folks were near me, I
should have nothing of that, and should feel nothing except my
misfortune. ”
Lukerya heaved a painful sigh. Her breathing, like her limbs,
was not under her control.
"When I come to think, master, of you,” she began again,
"you are very sorry for me. But you mustn't be too sorry,
really! I'll tell you one thing; for instance, I sometimes, even
Do you remember how merry I used to be in my time ?
A regular madcap! So do you know what ? I sing songs even
now. ”
"Sing? You ? »
“Yes: I sing the old songs- songs for choruses, for feasts,
Christmas songs, all sorts !
I know such a lot of them, you see,
and I've not forgotten them. Only dance songs I don't sing. In
my state now, it wouldn't suit me. ”
“How do you sing them ? — to yourself?
« To myself, yes; and aloud too. I can't sing loud, but still
one can understand it. I told you a little girl waits on me. A
clever little orphan she is. So I have taught her: four songs
she has learnt from me already. Don't you believe me? Wait a
minute, I'll show you directly. ”
Lukerya took breath. The thought that this half-dead creat-
ure was making ready to begin singing raised an involuntary
feeling of dread in me. But before I could utter a word, a long-
drawn-out, hardly audible, but pure and true note, was quivering
in my ears; it was followed by a second and a third.
« In the
meadows,” sang Lukerya. She sang, the expression of her stony
now
(
>
## p. 15126 (#62) ###########################################
15126
IVAN TURGENEFF
face unchanged, even her eyes riveted on one spot.
one spot. But how
touchingly tinkled out that poor struggling little voice, that
wavered like a thread of smoke; how she longed to pour out all
her soul in it! I felt no dread now; my heart throbbed with
unutterable pity.
“Ah, I can't! ” she said suddenly. "I've not the strength: I'm
so upset with joy at seeing you. "
She closed her eyes.
I laid my hand on her tiny, chill fingers. She glanced at me,
and her dark lids, fringed with golden eyelashes, closed again, and
were still as an ancient statue's. An instant later they glist,
ened in the half-darkness. They were moistened by a tear.
As before, I did not stir.
«How silly I am! ” said Lukerya suddenly, with unexpected
force, and opened her eyes wide; she tried to wink the tears out
of them. "I ought to be ashamed ! What am I doing? It's a
long time since I have been like this - not since that day when
Vassya Polyakov was here last spring. While he sat with me
and talked, I was all right; but when he had gone away, how I
did cry in my loneliness! Where did I get the tears from ?
But there! we girls get our tears for nothing. Master,” added
Lukerya, “perhaps you have a handkerchief. If you don't mind,
wipe my eyes. ”
I made haste to carry out her desire, and left her the hand-
kerchief. She refused it at first. “What good's such a gift to
me ? ” she said. The handkerchief was plain enough, but clean
and white. Afterwards she clutched it in her weak fingers, and
did not loosen them again.
with his feet and twitching his shoulder; while Yashka's eyes
fairly glowed like coals, and he trembled all over like a leaf, and
smiled nervously. The Wild Master alone did not change counte-
nance, and stood motionless as before; but his eyes, fastened on
the booth-keeper, looked somewhat softened, though the expression
of his lips was still scornful. Emboldened by the signs of general
approbation, the booth-keeper went off in a whirl of flourishes;
and began to round off such trills, to turn such shakes off his
tongue, and to make such furious play with his throat, that when
at last, pale, exhausted, and bathed in hot perspiration, he uttered
the last dying note, his whole body flung back, a general united
shout greeted him in a violent outburst. The Gabbler threw
himself on his neck, and began strangling him in his long bony.
arms; a flush came out on Nikolai Ivan’itch's oily face, and he
seemed to have grown younger; Yashka shouted like mad, “Cap.
ital, capital! ” Even my neighbor, the peasant in the torn smock,
could not restrain himself; and with a blow of his fist on the
table he cried, "Aha! well done, damn my soul, well done! »
And he spat on one side with an air of decision.
"Well, brother, you've given us a treat! ” bawled the Gabbler,
not releasing the exhausted booth-keeper from his embraces;
"you've given us a treat, there's no denying! You've won, brother,
you've won! I congratulate you — the quart's yours! Yashka's
miles behind you, I tell you; miles — take my word for it. ”
And
again he hugged the booth-keeper to his breast.
“There, let him alone, let him alone; there's no being rid of
you,” said the Blinkard with vexation; let him sit down on the
bench; he's tired, see. - You're a ninny, brother, a perfect ninny!
-
What are you sticking to him like a wet leaf for? ”
“Well, then, let him sit down, and I'll drink to his health,”
said the Gabbler, and he went up to the bar. “At your expense,
brother,” he added, addressing the booth-keeper.
»
## p. 15114 (#50) ###########################################
15114
IVAN TURGENEFF
The latter nodded, sat down on the bench, pulled a piece of
cloth out of his cap, and began wiping his face; while the Gab-
bler, with greedy haste, emptied his glass, and with a grunt,
assumed, after the manner of confirmed drinkers, an expression
of careworn melancholy.
“You sing beautifully, brother, beautifully,” Nikolai Ivan'itch
observed caressingly. “And now it's your turn, Yashka; mind,
now, don't be afraid. We shall see who's who; we shall see.
The booth-keeper sings beautifully, though; 'pon my soul, he
does. ”
“Very beautifully,” observed Nikolai Ivan’itch's wife, and she
looked with a smile at Yakov.
“Beautifully, ha! ” repeated my neighbor in an undertone.
“Ah, a wild man of the woods! ” the Gabbler vociferated sud-
denly; and going up to the peasant with the rent on his shoulder,
he pointed at him with his finger, while he pranced about and
went off into an insulting guffaw. "Ha! ha! get along! wild
man of the woods! Here's a ragamuffin from Woodland village!
What brought you here ? ” he bawled amidst laughter.
The poor peasant was abashed, and was just about to get up
and make off as fast as he could, when suddenly the Wild Master's
iron voice was heard :
« What does the insufferable brute mean? ” he articulated,
grinding his teeth.
"I wasn't doing nothing," muttered the Gabbler. “I didn't-
I only — "
“There, all right, shut up! ” retorted the Wild Master. “Yakov,
begin ! »
Yakov took himself by his throat:
“–
"Well, really, brothers - Something - H'm, I don't know,
on my word, what — »
“Come, that's enough; don't be timid. For shame! why go
back? Sing the best you can, by God's gift. ”
And the Wild Master looked down expectant. Yakov was
silent for a minute; he glanced round, and covered his face with
his hand. All had their eyes simply fastened upon him; especially
the booth-keeper, on whose face a faint, involuntary uneasiness
could be seen through his habitual expression of self-confidence
and the triumph of his success. He leant back against the wall,
and again put both hands under him, but did not swing his legs
as before. When at last Yakov uncovered his face, it was pale
as a dead man's; his eyes gleamed faintly under their drooping
(
## p. 15115 (#51) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15115
((
lashes. He gave a deep sigh, and began to sing. The first
sound of his voice was faint and unequal, and seemed not to
come from his chest, but to be wafted from somewhere afar off,
as though it had floated by chance into the room. A strange
effect was produced on all of us by this trembling, resonant note:
we glanced at one another, and Nikolai Ivan'itch's wife seemed to
draw herself up. This first note was followed by another, bolder
and prolonged, but still obviously quivering - like a harpstring,
when, suddenly struck by a stray finger, it throbs in a last swiftly
dying tremble; the second was followed by a third; and gradually
gaining fire and breadth, the strains swelled into a pathetic
melody.
“Not one little path ran into the field,” he sang; and sweet
and mournful it was in our ears. I have seldom, I must con-
fess, heard a voice like it: it was slightly hoarse, and not per-
fectly true; there was even something morbid about it at first:
but it had genuine depth of passion, and youth and sweetness,
and a sort of fascinating, careless, pathetic melancholy. A spirit
of truth and fire, a Russian spirit, was sounding and breathing
in that voice; and it seemed to go straight to your heart, - to
go straight to all that was Russian in it. The song swelled and
flowed. Yakov was clearly carried away by enthusiasm: he was
not timid now; he surrendered himself wholly to the rapture of
his art: his voice no longer trembled; it quivered, but with the
scarce perceptible inward quiver of passion, which pierces like an
arrow to the very soul of the listeners: and he steadily gained
strength and firmness and breadth. I remember I once saw at
sunset on a flat sandy shore, when the tide was low and the sea's
roar came weighty and menacing from the distance, a great white
sea-gull; it sat motionless, its silky bosom facing the crimson
glow of the setting sun, and only now and then opening wide
its great wings to greet the well-known sea, to greet the sinking
lurid sun: I recalled it, as I heard Yakov. He sang, utterly for-
getful of his rival and all of us; he seemed supported, as a bold
swimmer by the waves, by our silent, passionate sympathy. He
sang, and in every sound of his voice one seemed to feel some-
thing dear and akin to us; something of breadth and space, as
though the familiar steppes were unfolding before our eyes and
stretching away into endless distance.
I felt the tears gathering in my bosom and rising to my eyes;
suddenly I was struck by dull, smothered sobs. I looked round;
## p. 15116 (#52) ###########################################
15116
IVAN TURGENEFF
(
the innkeeper's wife was weeping, her bosom pressed close to
the window. Yakov threw a quick glance at her, and he sang
more sweetly, more melodiously than ever; Nikolai Ivan'itch
looked down; the Blinkard turned away; the Gabbler, quite
touched, stood, his gaping mouth stupidly open; the humble peas-
ant was sobbing softly in the corner, and shaking his head with
a plaintive murmur; on the iron visage of the Wild Master,
from under his overhanging brows, there slowly rolled a heavy
tear; the booth-keeper raised his clenched fist to his brow, and
did not stir. I don't know how the general emotion would have
ended, if Yakov had not come to a full stop on a high, excep-
tionally shrill note—as though his voice had broken.
No one
called out, or even stirred: every one seemed to be waiting to
see whether he was not going to sing more; but he opened his
eyes as though wondering at our silence, looked round at all of
us with a face of inquiry, and saw that the victory was his.
“Yasha,” said the Wild Master, laying his hand on his shoul-
der — and he could say no more.
We all stood, as it were, petrified. The booth-keeper softly
rose and went up to Yakov.
“You — yours — you've won,” he articulated at last with an
effort; and rushed out of the room. His rapid, decided action, as
it were, broke the spell: we all suddenly fell into noisy, delighted
talk. The Gabbler bounded up and down, stammered, and brand-
ished his arms like mill sails; the Blinkard limped up to Yakov
and began kissing him; Nikolai Ivan'itch got up and solemnly
announced that he would add a second pot of beer from himself.
The Wild Master laughed a sort of kind, simple laugh, which I
should never have expected to see on his face; the humble peas-
ant, as he wiped his eyes, cheeks, nose, and beard on his sleeves,
kept repeating in his corner, "Ah, beautiful it was, by God!
blast me for the son of a dog, but it was fine! ” while Nikolai
Ivan'itch's wife, her face red with weeping, got up quickly and
went away. Yakov was enjoying his triumph like a child: his
whole face was transformed, his eyes especially fairly glowed
with happiness. They dragged him to the bar; he beckoned the
weeping peasant up to it, and sent the innkeeper's little son
to look after the booth-keeper, who was not found, however: and
the festivities began. “You'll sing to us again; you're going to
sing to us till evening,” the Gabbler declared, flourishing his
hands in the air.
((
## p. 15117 (#53) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15117
I took one more look at Yakov, and went out. I did not
want to stay - I was afraid of spoiling the impression I had
received. But the heat was as insupportable as before. It
seemed hanging in a thick, heavy layer right over the earth;
over the dark-blue sky, tiny bright fires seemed whisking through
the finest, almost black dust. Everything was still; and there
was something hopeless and oppressive in this profound hush of
exhausted nature. I made my way to a hay-loft, and lay down
on the fresh-cut but already almost dry grass. For a long while
I could not go to sleep; for a long while Yakov's irresistible
yoice was ringing in my ears. At last the heat and fatigue
regained their sway, however, and I fell into a dead sleep.
When I waked up, everything was in darkness: the hay scattered
around smelt strong and was slightly damp; through the slender
rafters of the half-open roof, pale stars were faintly twinkling.
I went out. The glow of sunset had long died away, and
its last trace showed in a faint light on the horizon; but above
the freshness of the night there was still a feeling of heat in
the atmosphere, lately baked through by the sun, and the breast
still craved a draught of cool air. There was no wind, nor
were there any clouds; the sky all round was clear and transpar-
ently dark, softly glimmering with innumerable but scarcely visible
stars,
There were lights twinkling about the village; from the flar-
ing tavern close by rose a confused, discordant din, amid which
I fancied I recognized the voice of Yakov. Violent laughter
came from there in an outburst at times. I went up to the
little window and pressed my face against the pane. I saw a
cheerless, though varied and animated scene. All were drunk
all from Yakov upwards. With breast bared, he sat on a bench,
and singing in a thick voice a street song to a dance-tune, he
lazily fingered and strummed on the strings of a guitar. His
moist hair hung in tufts over his fearfully pale face. In the
middle of the room, the Gabbler, completely "screwed” and
”
without his coat, was hopping about in a dance before the
peasant in the gray smock: the peasant, on his side, was with
difficulty stamping and scraping with his feet, and grinning
meaninglessly over his disheveled beard; he waved one hand
from time to time, as much as to say, Here goes! ”
Nothing
could be more ludicrous than his face; however much he twitched
up his eyebrows, his heavy lids would hardly rise, but seemed
## p. 15118 (#54) ###########################################
15118
IVAN TURGENEFF
He was
lying upon his scarcely visible, dim, and mawkish eyes.
in that amiable frame of mind of a perfectly intoxicated man,
when every passer-by, directly he looks him in the face, is sure
to say, "Bless you, brother, bless you! ” The Blinkard, as red as
a lobster, and his nostrils dilated wide, was laughing malignantly
in a corner; only Nikolai Ivan’itch, as befits a good tavern-keeper,
preserved his composure unchanged.
The room was thronged
with many new faces; but the Wild Master I did not see in it.
I turned away with rapid steps, and began descending the
hill on which Kolotovka lies. At the foot of this hill stretches a
wide plain; plunged in the misty waves of the evening haze, it
seemed more immense, and was, as it were, merged in the dark-
ening sky. I walked with long strides along the road by the
ravine, when all at once from somewhere far away in the plain
came a boy's clear voice: "Antropka! Antropka-a-a! ” He shouted
in obstinate and tearful desperation, with long, long drawing out
of the last syllable.
He was silent for a few instants, and started shouting again.
His voice rang out clear in the still, lightly slumbering air.
Thirty times at least he had called the name Antropka; when
suddenly, from the farthest end of the plain, as though from
another world, there floated a scarcely audible reply:-
“Wha-a-t? ”
The boy's voice shouted back at once with gleeful exaspera-
tion:
«Come here, devil! woo-od imp!
«What fo-or? ” replied the other, after a long interval.
“Because dad wants to thrash you! ” the first voice shouted
back hurriedly.
The second voice did not call back again, and the boy fell to
shouting "Antropka” once more. His cries, fainter and less and
less frequent, still floated up to my ears, when it had grown
completely dark, and I had turned the corner of the wood which
skirts my village, and lies over three miles from Kolotovka.
"Antropka-a-a! ) was still audible in the air, filled with the
shadows of night.
>
## p. 15119 (#55) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15119
A LIVING RELIC
From A Sportsman's Sketches)
T
>
He same day we made our way to my mother's peasant set-
tlement,- the existence of which, I must confess, I had not
even suspected till then. At this settlement, it turned out,
there was a little lodge. It was very old, but as it had not been
inhabited, it was clean: I passed a fairly tranquil night in it.
The next day I woke up very early. The sun had only just
risen; there was not a single cloud in the sky; everything around
shone with a double brilliance, - the brightness of the fresh
morning rays and of yesterday's downpour. While they were
harnessing me a cart, I went for a stroll about a small orchard,
now neglected and run wild, which inclosed the little lodge on
all sides with its fragrant, sappy growth. Ah, how sweet it was
in the open air, under the bright sky, where the larks were trill-
ing, whence their bell-like notes rained down like silvery beads!
On their wings, doubtless, they had carried off drops of dew, and
their songs seemed steeped in dew. I took my cap off my head
and drew a glad deep breath. On the slope of a shallow ravine,
close to the hedge, could be seen a beehive; a narrow path led
to it, winding like a snake between dense walls of high grass and
nettles, above which struggled up, God knows whence brought,
the pointed stalks of dark-green hemp.
I turned along this path; I reached the beehive. Beside it
stood a little wattled shanty, where they put the beehives for the
winter. I peeped into the half-open door: it was dark, still, dry,
within; there was a scent of mint and balm. In the corner were
some trestles fitted together, and on them, covered with a quilt,
a little figure of some sort. I was walking away —
« Master, master! Piotr Petrovitch! ” I heard a voice, faint,
slow, and hoarse, like the whispering of marsh rushes.
I stopped.
Piotr Petrovitch! Come in, please! ” the voice repeated. It
came from the corner where were the trestles I had noticed.
I drew near, and was struck dumb with amazement. Before
me lay a living human being; but what sort of a creature was
it ?
A head utterly withered, of a uniform coppery hue- like
some very ancient holy picture, yellow with age; a sharp nose
## p. 15120 (#56) ###########################################
15120
IVAN TURGENEFF
like a keen-edged knife; the lips could barely be seen - only the
teeth flashed white, and the eyes; and from under the kerchief
some thin wisps of yellow hair straggled on to the forehead. At
the chin, where the quilt was folded, two tiny hands of the same
coppery hue were moving, the fingers slowly twitching like little
sticks. I looked more intently: the face, far from being ugly,
was positively beautiful, but strange and dreadful; and the face
seemed the more dreadful to me that on it, on its metallic cheeks,
I saw struggling -- struggling and unable to form itself - a smile.
a
“ You don't recognize me, master ? ” whispered the voice
again: it seemed to be breathed from the almost unmoving lips.
"And indeed, how should you ? I'm Lukerya. Do you remem-
ber who used to lead the dance at your mother's, at Spasskoye ?
Do you remember I used to be leader of the choir too ? ”
«Lukerya! ” I cried. "Is it you? Can it be? ”
"
“Yes, it's I, master - I, Lukerya. ”
I did not know what to say, and gazed in stupefaction at
the dark motionless face, with the clear, death-like eyes . fastened
upon me.
Was it possible ? This mummy Lukerya — the great-
est beauty in all our household - that tall, plump, pink-and-white,
singing, laughing, dancing creature! Lukerya, our smart Lu-
kerya, whom all our lads were courting, for whom I heaved some
secret sighs — I, a boy of sixteen!
“Mercy, Lukerya! ” I said at last: “what is it has happened
to you? ”
Oh, such a misfortune befell me! But don't mind me, sir;
don't let my trouble revolt you: sit there on that little tub;
little nearer, or you won't be able to hear me. I've not much of
a voice nowadays! Well, I am glad to see you! What brought
you to Aleksyevka ? ”
Lukerya spoke very softly and feebly, but without pausing.
“Yermolaï the huntsman brought me here. But you tell
»
a
>
me
(
me
– six or
“Tell you about my trouble? Certainly, sir. It happened to
a long while ago now
seven years. I had only
just been betrothed then to Vassily Polyakov — do you remember,
such a fine-looking fellow he was, with curly hair ? -- he waited
at table at your mother's. But you weren't in the country then;
you had gone away to Moscow to your studies. We were very
much in love, Vassily and me; I could never get him out of
my head: and it was in the spring it all happened. Well, one
## p. 15121 (#57) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15121
sir. »
night - not long before sunrise, it was — I couldn't sleep: a night-
-
ingale in the garden was singing so wonderfully sweet! I could
not help getting up and going out on to the steps to listen. It
trilled and trilled; and all at once I fancied some one called me
—it seemed like Vassya's voice — so softly: Lusha! ' I looked
round; and being half asleep, I suppose, I missed my footing and
fell straight down from the top step, and flop on to the ground !
And I thought I wasn't much hurt, for I got up directly and
went back to my room. Only it seems something inside me
in my body — was broken.
Let me get my breath — half a
minute
Lukerya ceased, and I looked at her with surprise. What sur-
prised me particularly was that she told her story almost cheer-
fully, without sighs and groans, not complaining nor asking for
sympathy.
'Ever since that happened,” Lukerya went on, "I began to
pine away and get thin; my skin got dark; walking was diffi-
cult for me; and then - I lost the use of my legs altogether,
- ;
I couldn't stand or sit; I had to lie down all the time. And
I didn't care to eat or drink: I got worse and worse.
Your
mamma, in the kindness of her heart, made me see doctors, and
sent me to a hospital. But there was no curing me. And not
one doctor could even say what my illness was. What didn't
they do to me? — they burnt my spine with hot irons, they put
me in lumps of ice, and it was all no good. I got quite numb
in the end. So the gentlemen decided it was no use doctoring
me any more, and there was no sense in keeping cripples up at
the great house; well, and so they sent me here — because I've
relations here. So here I live, as you see. ”
Lukerya was silent again, and again she tried to smile.
“But this is awful — your position! ” I cried; and not knowing
-
how to go on, I asked, "and what of Vassily Polyakov ? A most
stupid question it was.
Lukerya turned her eyes a little away.
"What of Polyakov ? He grieved — he grieved for a bit -
and he is married to another, a girl from Glinnoe.
know Glinnoe ? It's not far from us. Her name's Agrafena.
He loved me dearly — but you see, he's a young man: he could-
n't stay a bachelor. And what sort of a helpmeet could I be?
The wife he found for himself is a good, sweet woman — and they
have children. He lives here; he's a clerk at a neighbor's; your
XXVI-946
(
Do you
## p. 15122 (#58) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
151 22
»
mamma let him go off with a passport, and he's doing very well,
praise God. ”
"And so you go on lying here all the time? ” I asked again.
“Yes, sir, I've been lying here seven years.
In the summer-
time I lie here in this shanty, and when it gets cold they move
me out into the bath-house: I lie there. "
« Who waits on you ? Does any one look after you ? »
“Oh, there are kind folks here as everywhere; they don't
desert me. Yes, they see to me a little. As to food, I eat
nothing to speak of: but water is here in the pitcher; it's always
kept full of pure spring water.
I can
reach to the pitcher
myself: I've one arm still of use. There's a little girl here, an
orphan; now and then she comes to see me, the kind child. She
was here just now. You didn't meet her ? Such a pretty, fair
little thing. She brings me flowers. We've some in the garden
- there were some, but they've all disappeared. But you know,
wild flowers too are nice; they smell even sweeter than garden
Howers. Lilies of the valley, now — what could be sweeter ? »
"And aren't you dull and miserable, my poor Lukerya ? "
“Why, what is one to do? I wouldn't tell a lie about it. At
first it was very wearisome: but later on I got used to it, I got
more patient - it was nothing; there are others worse off still. ”
How do you mean? ”
Why, some haven't a roof to shelter them, and there are
some blind or deaf; while I, thank God, have splendid sight, and
hear everything - everything. If a mole burrows in the ground
-I hear even that. And I can smell every scent, even the
faintest! When the buckwheat comes into flower in the meadow,
or the lime-tree in the garden - I don't need to be told of it,
even; I'm the first to know directly. Anyway, if there's the least
bit of a wind blowing from that quarter. No, he who stirs God's
wrath is far worse off than me. Look at this, again: any one
in health may easily fall into sin; but I'm cut off even from sin.
The other day, Father Aleksy, the priest, came to give me the
sacrament, and he says, “There's no need,' says he, (to confess
you: you can't fall into sin in your condition, can you ? ' But I
said to him, How about sinning in thought, father? Ah, well,
says he, and he laughed himself, that's no great sin. ' But I
fancy I'm no great sinner even in that way, in thought,” Lukerya
went on; "for I've trained myself not to think, and above all,
not to remember. The time goes faster. ”
(
((
## p. 15123 (#59) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15123
his gun.
I must own I was astonished. “You're always alone, Lukerya:
how can you prevent the thoughts from coming into your head ?
or are you constantly asleep? "
" «Oh, no, sir! I can't always sleep. Though I've no great
pain, still I've an ache, there, - right inside, - and in my bones
too; it won't let me sleep as I ought. No; but there, I lie by
myself; I lie here and lie here, and don't think: I feel that
I'm alive, I breathe; and I put myself all into that. I look and
listen. The bees buzz and hum in the hive; a dove sits on the
roof and cooes; a hen comes along with her chickens to peck
up crumbs; or a sparrow Aies in, or a butterfly — that's a great
treat for me. Last year some swallows even built a nest over
there in the corner, and brought up their little ones.
Oh, how
interesting it was! One would fly to the nest, press close, feed
a young one, and off again. Look again: the other would be in
her place already. Sometimes it wouldn't fly in, but only fly
past the open door; and the little ones would begin to squawk,
and open their beaks directly. I was hoping for them back again
the next year, but they say a sportsman here shot them with
And what could he gain by it? It's hardly bigger, the
swallow, than a beetle. What wicked men you are, you sports-
men! »
"I don't shoot swallows," I hastened to remark.
"And once,” Lukerya began again, "it was comical, really.
A hare ran in; it did, really! The hounds, I suppose, were after
it; anyway, it seemed to tumble straight in at the door! It
squatted quite near me, and sat so a long while; it kept sniffing
with its nose, and twitching its whiskers - like a regular officer!
and it looked at me. It understood, to be sure, that I was no
danger to it. At last it got up, went hop-hop to the door, looked
round in the doorway; and what did it look like? Such a funny
fellow it was! »
Lukerya glanced at me, as much as to say, “Wasn't it funny? ”
To satisfy her, I laughed. She moistened her parched lips.
"Well, in the winter, of course, I'm worse off, because it's
dark: to burn a candle would be a pity, and what would be the
use? I can read, to be sure, and was always fond of reading;
but what could I read? There are no books of any kind; and
even if there were, how could I hold a book ? Father Aleksy
brought me a calendar to entertain me; but he saw it was no
good, so he took and carried it away again. But even though
## p. 15124 (#60) ###########################################
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IVAN TURGENEFF
a
So we
it's dark, there's always something to listen to: a cricket chirps,
or a mouse begins scratching somewhere. That's when it's a
good thing - not to think! -
“And I repeat the prayers too,” Lukerya went on, after taking
breath a little; "only I don't know many of them — the prayers,
I mean. And besides, why should I weary the Lord God? What
can I ask him for ? He knows better than I what I need. He
has laid a cross upon me: that means that he loves me.
are commanded to understand. I repeat the Lord's Prayer, the
Hymn to the Virgin, the Supplication of all the Afflicted, and I
lie still again, without any thought at all, and am all right! ”
Two minutes passed by. I did not break the silence, and did
not stir on the narrow tub which served me as a seat. The cruel
stony stillness of the living, unlucky creature lying before me
communicated itself to me; I too turned, as it were, numb.
“Listen, Lukerya,” I began at last; “listen to the suggestion
I'm going to make to you. Would you like me to arrange for
them to take you to a hospital — a good hospital in the town?
Who knows - perhaps you might yet be cured; anyway, you
would not be alone. ”
Lukerya's eyebrows fluttered faintly. Oh, no, sir,” she an-
swered in a troubled whisper: “don't move me into a hospital;
don't touch me. I shall only have more agony to bear there!
How could they cure me now? Why, there was a doctor came
here once; he wanted to examine me. I begged him for Christ's
sake not to disturb me.
He began turning
me over, pounding my hands and legs, and pulling me about.
He said, 'I'm doing this for science; I'm a servant of science
a scientific man! And you,' he said, really oughtn't to oppose
me, because I've a medal given me for my labors, and it's for
you simpletons I'm toiling. He mauled me about, told me the
name of my disease some wonderful long name and with that
he went away; and all my poor bones ached for a week after.
You say I'm all alone; always alone. Oh, no, I'm not always:
they come to see I'm quiet - I don't bother them. The
peasant girls come in and chat a bit; a pilgrim woman will
wander in, and tell me tales of Jerusalem, of Kiev, of the holy
towns. And I'm not afraid of being alone. Indeed, it's better
ay, ay! Master, don't touch me, don't take me to the hospi-
tal. Thank you, you are kind: only don't touch me, there's a
dear! ”
((
It was
no
use,
me.
## p. 15125 (#61) ###########################################
IVAN TURGENEFF
15125
»
C
“Well, as you like, as you like, Lukerya. You know I only
suggested it for your good. ”
"I know, master, that it was for my good. But master dear,
who can help another? Who can enter into his soul ? Every
man must help himself! -You won't believe me, perhaps: I lie
here sometimes so alone; and it's as though there were no one
else in the world but me. As if I alone were living! And it
seems to me as though something were blessing me. I'm carried
away by dreams that are really marvelous ! »
« What do you dream of, then, Lukerya ? ”
« That too, master, I couldn't say: one can't explain. Besides,
one forgets afterwards. It's like a cloud coming over and burst-
ing; then it grows so fresh and sweet: but just what it was,
there's no knowing! Only my idea is, if folks were near me, I
should have nothing of that, and should feel nothing except my
misfortune. ”
Lukerya heaved a painful sigh. Her breathing, like her limbs,
was not under her control.
"When I come to think, master, of you,” she began again,
"you are very sorry for me. But you mustn't be too sorry,
really! I'll tell you one thing; for instance, I sometimes, even
Do you remember how merry I used to be in my time ?
A regular madcap! So do you know what ? I sing songs even
now. ”
"Sing? You ? »
“Yes: I sing the old songs- songs for choruses, for feasts,
Christmas songs, all sorts !
I know such a lot of them, you see,
and I've not forgotten them. Only dance songs I don't sing. In
my state now, it wouldn't suit me. ”
“How do you sing them ? — to yourself?
« To myself, yes; and aloud too. I can't sing loud, but still
one can understand it. I told you a little girl waits on me. A
clever little orphan she is. So I have taught her: four songs
she has learnt from me already. Don't you believe me? Wait a
minute, I'll show you directly. ”
Lukerya took breath. The thought that this half-dead creat-
ure was making ready to begin singing raised an involuntary
feeling of dread in me. But before I could utter a word, a long-
drawn-out, hardly audible, but pure and true note, was quivering
in my ears; it was followed by a second and a third.
« In the
meadows,” sang Lukerya. She sang, the expression of her stony
now
(
>
## p. 15126 (#62) ###########################################
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IVAN TURGENEFF
face unchanged, even her eyes riveted on one spot.
one spot. But how
touchingly tinkled out that poor struggling little voice, that
wavered like a thread of smoke; how she longed to pour out all
her soul in it! I felt no dread now; my heart throbbed with
unutterable pity.
“Ah, I can't! ” she said suddenly. "I've not the strength: I'm
so upset with joy at seeing you. "
She closed her eyes.
I laid my hand on her tiny, chill fingers. She glanced at me,
and her dark lids, fringed with golden eyelashes, closed again, and
were still as an ancient statue's. An instant later they glist,
ened in the half-darkness. They were moistened by a tear.
As before, I did not stir.
«How silly I am! ” said Lukerya suddenly, with unexpected
force, and opened her eyes wide; she tried to wink the tears out
of them. "I ought to be ashamed ! What am I doing? It's a
long time since I have been like this - not since that day when
Vassya Polyakov was here last spring. While he sat with me
and talked, I was all right; but when he had gone away, how I
did cry in my loneliness! Where did I get the tears from ?
But there! we girls get our tears for nothing. Master,” added
Lukerya, “perhaps you have a handkerchief. If you don't mind,
wipe my eyes. ”
I made haste to carry out her desire, and left her the hand-
kerchief. She refused it at first. “What good's such a gift to
me ? ” she said. The handkerchief was plain enough, but clean
and white. Afterwards she clutched it in her weak fingers, and
did not loosen them again.
