I was pum- meled, the door of my house was broken in (for which I pay a third as rent), and the lintel
overhead
was burned.
Universal Anthology - v04
321
Two words of nonsense are two words too much ; Whole volumes of good sense will never tire. What multitudes of lines hath Homer wrote ! Who ever thought he wrote one line too much ?
Extremes of fortune are true wisdom's test, And he's the wisest man who bears them best
Diphilus.
[Contemporary of Menander and Philemon. ]
From off the farm comes once in every year A cheery ass, to me who love his cheer ; Like hamper burst at once in all its twigs, Bearing libations, oil, meal, honey, figs.
Time, 0 my guest, is a wright who works a curse : He joys in transformations for the worse.
There is no life but evil happenings seize, — Griefs, cares, and robberies, torments and disease ; Death in physician's guise cuts short their number, Filling the victim's closing scene with slumber.
To Bacchus.
0 friend to the wise, to the children of song
Take me with thee, thou wisest and sweetest, along ;
To the humble, the lowly, proud thoughts dost thou bring, For the wretch who has thee is as blithe as a king ;
From the brows of the sage, in thy humorous play,
Thou dost smooth every furrow and wrinkle away ;
To the weak thou giv'st strength, to the mendicant gold, And a slave warmed by thee as a lion is bold.
Suspicious Circumstances.
Wee have in Corinth this good Law in use : If wee see any person keepe great cheere, Wee make inquirie, whether he doe worke, Or if he have Revenues coming in !
If either, then we say no more of him.
But if the Charge exceed his Gaine or Rents, He is forbidden to run on his course ;
If he continue he pays fine
If he want where withal, he at last
Taken by sergeants and in prison cast.
vol. iv. —21
is
;
it,
a
FRAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS.
For to spend much, and never to get aught,
Is cause of much disorder in the world.
One in the nighttime filcheth from the flocks ; Another breaks a house or else a shop ;
A third man gets a share his mouth to stop. To beare a part in this good fellowship,
One feignes a suit his neighbor to molest, Another must false witness beare with him ; But such a crue we utterly detest,
And banish from our citie like the pest.
Philippides.
[Flourished about b. c. 320-300. ]
When you have erred, be glad that you are blamed Thus only is a balanced mind preserved.
It is not hard for those in weakly plight To tell the lusty ones, " Don't misbehave ! " And 'tis no task to blame the fighting fist, But to fight personally is not so easy : Talking is one thing, acting is another.
Desert a Beggar Born.
It grieves me much to see the world so changed, And men of worth, ingenious and well born, Reduced to poverty, while cunning knaves,
The very scum of the people, eat their fish, Bought for two oboli, on plates of silver, Weighing at least a mina ; a few capers,
Not worth three pieces of brass money, served In lordly silver dish, that weighs at least
As much as fifteen drachmas. In times past A little cup presented to the gods
Was thought a splendid offering : but such gifts Are now but seldom seen ; and reason good, — For 'tis no sooner on the altar placed
Than rogues are watching to purloin it thence.
Apollodorus (Caktstius).
[Flourished about b. c 300-260. ]
Make fast your door with bars of iron quite : No architect can build a door so tight
But cat and paramour will get through in spite.
FRAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS. 328
Each one by his deeds should be Illustrious, with humility.
A peaceful life is sweet ; it would be blest And honored, if as peaceful were the rest : But living wild with monkeys one must be A monkey. Oh, the life of misery !
When I was young, I pitied those untimely reft in their bloom ; But now when I see the aged borne along to the tomb,
I weep indeed — but for my fate, not for theirs, is the gloom.
A One-Sided Retort.
I do not scorn, Philinus, old men's ways,
Which may be yours when age has come to you,
But yet our fathers are at disadvantage
In this — Unless your sire does something for you, You rate him, " Haven't you been young yourself ? " But father cannot say in turn to son
When erring — " Haven't you been old yourself ? "
There is a certain hospitable air
In a friend's home that tells me I am welcome;
The porter opens to me with a smile,
The yard dog wags his tail, the servant runs, — Beats up the cushion, spreads the couch, and says
" Sit down, good sir ! " ere I can say I'm weary.
Euphrok.
[Dates unknown. ]
Tell me, all-judging Jove, if this be fair,— To make so short a life so full of care ?
Who by his own profession is distrest,
How should he manage well the public chest ?
Wretch ! find new gods to witness to new lies : Thy perjuries have made the old too wise !
Phcenicides.
[Flourished about b. c. 272. ] A Courtesan and Her Keepers.
So help me Venus ! as I'm fairly sick — Sick to the soul, my Pythias, of this trade —
FRAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS.
No more on't ! I'll be no man's mistress, I ;
Don't talk to me of Destiny — I've done with't ;
I'll hear no prophecies, for mark me well : —
No sooner did I buckle to this business,
Than straight behold a man of war assailed me : He told me of his battles o'er and o'er, — Showed me good stock of scars, but none of cash No, not a doit ; but still he vapored much
Of what a certain prince would do, and talked
Of this and that commission — in the clouds :
By which he gulled me of a twelvemonth's hope, Lived at free cost, and fed me upon love.
At length I sent my man of valor packing,
And a grave son of Physic filled his place :
My house now seemed a hospital of lazars,
And the vile beggar mangled without mercy,
A very hangman bathed in human gore.
My soldier was a prince compared to this,
For his were merry fibs : this son of death Turned everything he touched into a corpse. When Fortune, who had yet good store of spite, Now coupled me to a most learned philosopher; Plenty of beard he had, a cloak withal,
Enough to spare of each, and more maxims, More than I could digest, but money — none ; His sect abhorred it ; 'twas a thing proscribed By his philosophy, an evil root,
And when I asked him for a taste, 'twas poison; Still I demanded and for the reason — That he so slightly prized all in vain
could not wring drachma from his clutches, — Defend me, Heaven, from all philosophers
Posidippus. [Began to exhibit in 289. ]
Our talent gains us much acquaintanceship, Our soul and manners nearly all our friends.
Strato.
[Uncertain probably contemporary of the above. ]
The Learned Servant.
I've harbored he-sphinx and not cook
For, by the gods, he talked to me in riddles, And coined new words that pose me to interpret.
; a
a ;
!
I
a
it,
it ;
FEAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS.
No sooner had he entered on his office, — Than, eyeing me from head to foot, he cries
" How many mortals hast thou bid to supper ? " Mortals ! quoth I — what tell you me of mortals ? Let Jove decide on their mortality ;
You're crazy, sure : none by that name are bidden. " No table usher, no one to"officiate
As master of the courses ? — No such person ; Moschion and Niceratus and Philinus,
These are my guests and friends, and amongst these
You'll find no table-decker, as
" Gods ! is it possible ? " cried he : Most certain,
I patiently replied. He swelled and huffed,
As forsooth, had done him heinous wrong,
And robbed him of his proper dignity
Ridiculous conceit — " What offering mak'st thou To Erysichthon " he demanded None.
" Shall not the wide-horned ox be felled " " cries he
sacrifice no ox. — "Nor yet a wether
Not by Jove simple sheep, perhaps.
" And what's wether but a sheep " cries he.
I'm plain man, my friend, and therefore speak Plain language " What speak as Homer does And sure cook may use like privilege,
And more than blind poet. " — Not with me:
I'll have no kitchen Homers in my house
So pray discharge yourself. — This said, we parted.
Bato.
[Flourished about b. c. 217. ]
man, you've erred in life 'twould be
Being
A miracle to succeed perpetually.
The Scholar.
Good, good, Sibynna! Ours no art for sluggards to acquire,
Nor should the hour of deepest midnight see Us and our volumes parted still our lamp Upon its oil feeding, and the page
Of ancient lore before us — What, what hath The Sicyonian deduced what school points Have we from him of Chios Sagest Actides
—
And Zopyrinus, what are their traditions
Thus grapple we with mighty tomes of wisdom, Sifting and weighing and digesting all.
Itake it.
?
?
:
? :
;
:I
is
a : a:a ? I !
is
a
a
!
I
aI, if,
: ?
? ? ;
;
:
326 THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
[FLerondas (or Hebodab) flourished probably about b. c. 250. ]
(The first three translated by J. A. Symonds : the comments and abstracts by him also. )
The Go-between.
Scene : A Private House, where Meteioha, a young wife, in the absence of her husband, Mandris, on the sea, is seated alone within reach of a female slave, Thbessa. Gvllis comes to pay a visit.
Metricha — Thressa, some one is knocking at the house door. Won't you run to see whether a visitor has arrived from the country ?
Thressa — Who knocks ?
Gyllis — It's me.
Thressa — Who are you ? Are you afraid to come near ? Gyllis — Well, then, see, I have come up.
Thressa — Who are you, say ?
Q-yllis — Gyllis, the mother of Philaenion.
inside there that I'm here.
Metricha — Invite her in. Who is she ?
Thressa — Gyllis.
Metricha — Grandam Gyllis! [To the slave. ] Turn your
back a minute, girl. [To Gyllis. ] Which of the Fates has coaxed you into coming, Gyllis, to our house ? What brings you here like a deity to mortals ? I verily believe it must be five months or near it since you, Gyllis, even in a dream, so help me Fate, were seen by any one approaching this door.
Gyllis — I live a long way off, child, and in the lanes the mud is up to one's knees ; besides, I have no more strength than a fly. Old age is dragging us down, and the shadow stands anear and waits.
Metricha — Tut, tut ! Don't calumniate time in that way ! You're strong enough yet, Gyllis, to throttle your neighbors.
Gyllis — Jeer on ! That's the way with you young women. Metricha — Pray don't take fire at what I said.
Gyllis — Well, then, my girl, how long do you mean to go on like a widow, in loneliness, wearing out your solitary bed ?
Tell Metricha
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
327
From the day when Mandris set sail for Egypt, ten moons have come and gone, and he does not send you so much as a letter. Truly, he has forgotten, and has drunken at fresh fountains. There, ah, there is the palace of the goddess ! For everything, I tell you, that is found upon this earth, or can be found, grows in abundance there in Egypt : riches, gymnasia, power and might, fair sunny skies, glory, splendid shows, philoso phers, gold, blooming youths, the temple gardens of twin gods, a king of the best, a museum, wine, all the good things one's heart can wish for, women in bevies — I swear by Hades, the heavens above boast not so many stars —lovely, too, as were the goddesses what time they came to Paris for the prize of beauty (may they not hear me saying this But you, poor thing, what your sort of spirit that you sit and warm that chair Will you let old age overtake you unawares, and ashes consume your youth Take another course for two or three days change your mind in jocund mirth set up with some new friend The ship that rides at one anchor not safely
moored. No mortal knows the future. Life uncertain ever. Metricha — What are you talking about
Gyllis — Is there any one near who can overhear us Metricha — None that know of.
Gyllis — Listen, then, to what have come to tell you after all this time Gryllus, the son of Matakine, Pataecius's wife, the fellow who has conquered in five conquests — as boy at the Pythian games, twice at Corinth with youths in bloom, twice at Olympia with full-grown pugilists — he owns pretty fortune, too, without having to stir finger, and as regards the Queen of Love, he seal unbroken. The man I'm talking of saw you at the Descent of Misa fell desperately in love his bowels burned for you and now he will not leave my dwelling night or day, my girl, but makes lament to me, and wheedles, and ready to die of his love-longing. Nay, come, child, Metricha, grant me this one peccadillo. Adjust yourself
to the goddess else will old age, who looks toward you, take you unawares. By doing this you'll get paid twice. See, then, obey my counsels. love you, by the Fates.
Metricha — Gyllis, whiteness of hair blunts the edge of understanding. As hope for the return of Mandris and for Demeter to befriend me, could not have taken words like these from any other woman, but should have taught the lame to sing lame, and turned her out of doors. beg you never to
I
?
is
;
I
I
:
;
:
!
is
is
IIis ? a
;
I ;a
;
aa?
! ). is
?
328 THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
come to me again with messages of this kind. Tales that are fit for wantons, go tell to silly girls. Leave Metricha, Pytho's daughter, to warm her chair. Nobody laughs at Mandris with impunity. But, as they say, that's not what Gyllis needs to hear. [Calling to the slave girl. '] Thressa, rub up the black bowl of whelk ; pour in three pints of pure wine, mix with water, and give it us to drink in a big cup. Here, Gyllis, drink !
[The rest of the dialogue is too corrupt to be translated. But it appears that Gyllis begins to make excuses for her ill-considered embassy, drinks freely, praises the excellence of Metricha's cellar, takes her leave with compliments, and goes off commending herself to more facile damsels.
[The next mime consists of a speech addressed to a Greek jury by the plaintiff in an action brought against a wealthy sea-captain for assault and battery. The plaintiff is himself a low fellow well known to the whole town for his bad life and infamous vocation ; yet he assumes the tone of a practised counsel, breaks out into telling sallies against the character of the defendant, causes the statutes to be read aloud by the clerk of the court, produces a witness, and concludes with a patriotic peroration. The whole piece reads extraordinarily like the parody or burlesque of some Attic oration. ]
The Ruffian.
Scene : A Court of Justice in the town of Cos. Battalos addresses the Jury.
If that fellow, just because he sails the sea or wears a mantle worth three minae, while I abide on land and drag about a threadbare cloak and rotten slippers, is to carry away by force one of my own girls without my consent, and that by night, mark you, — I say the security of the city, gentlemen, will be gone, and what you take such pride in, your inde pendence, will be abolished by Thales. His duty it was, knowing who he is and molded out of what clay, to live as I do, trembling with fear before the very lowest of the burghers. But now those men among you who are shields of the city, and who have far more right to brag about their birth than he — they respect the laws, and not one of the burghers ever cudgeled me, foreigner as I am, nor came to break into my house at night, nor set fire to it with torches, nor carried away
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
329
with force one of my young women. But that Phrygian who is now called Thales, but was formerly Artimnes, gentlemen of the jury, has done all these things, and has had no regard for law or prefect or archon. (Turns to the clerk. ') Well, I sup pose, clerk, you had better take and read the statute on assault with violence ; and do you stop the bung-hole of the water- clock, my friend, till he has finished, so that I may not, as the proverb runs, be throwing good money after bad.
[Battalos makes the clerk read out a passage of the law, while he bids the slave of the court stop the clepsydra, which times the length of his oration. ]
And if a free man assault a slave woman, or carry her away by force, he shall pay double damages.
[The clerk stops reading. Battalos goes on with his speech. ]
Those words, gentlemen of the jury, were written by Chae- rondas, and not by Battalos, the plaintiff in this suit against Thales. If one shall break a door, let him pay a mina, says the lawgiver ; if he strike with the fist, another mina ; if he burn the house or force entrance, a thousand drachmas ; and if he inflict personal injury, the penalty shall be double. For he dwelt in a city, Thales ; but you have no knowledge of any city, nor indeed of how a city is administered. To-day finds you in Bricindera, yesterday in Abdera ; to-morrow, if some one gives you passage money, you will sail maybe to Phaselis. To cut the matter short, gentlemen of the jury, and not to weary you with digressions, I suffered at the hands of Thales what the mouse did when the pitch caught him.
I was pum- meled, the door of my house was broken in (for which I pay a third as rent), and the lintel overhead was burned. [Calls to
the girl who had been carried off by Thales. ] Come hither, Myrtale, you also, and show yourself to all the folk ; don't be ashamed ; imagine to yourself that all the jurymen you're look ing at are fathers, brothers. Just see, gentlemen, how she's been torn from top to bottom, how that unholy rascal tore her to tatters when he dragged her off by force! Old age, to thee be sacrifices made ! Without you, he must have bled for it ! [Turns round to Thales, or to some one in the court who is jeer ing. ] You laugh? Well, I am a ruffian, and I don't deny it, and Battalos is my name, and my grandsire was Sisymbras, and my father Sisymbriscus, and each and all of us whoremasters —
330 THE MIMES OF HERONDA&
there ! but as for pluck, I'd strangle a lion, if the brute were Thales. [Addresses the defendant, Thales. '] Perhaps you are in love with Myrtale ? Nothing wonderful. I love my loaf. Give this, and you shall get that. Or else, by Jupiter, if you are in heat or so, stuff her price into the palm of Battalos ; go take and batter what belongs to you to your own heart's content.
the jury. ] There is still one point, gentlemen of the jury — this is the charge I make against yonder fellow — it remains with you, I say, in the absence of witnesses, to pro nounce sentence by the rules of equity — should he, however, want to put slaves to the test of torture, I am ready to offer myself also. Here, Thales, take and put me to the rack ; only see that the damages are paid into court first. Minos could not make more fair division and distinction by his weighing scales. For the rest, gentlemen of the jury, forget that you are voting for or against Battalos, the brothel keeper. Think that you are acting for all the foreigners established in your town. Now is the time for Cos and Merops to show what they are good for, Thessalus and Herakles the worth of their renown, Asklepios why he removed from Tricca, and for what cause Phoebe gave birth to Leto here. Considering all these matters, hold the helm of justice with right judgment, so that the Phrygian, hav ing felt your lash, may become the better for his punishment, if so be that the proverb transmitted to us from antiquity doth not speak untruth.
[The third mime, which follows, gives us sufficient insight into the behavior of a thoroughly ill-conducted vagabond of a schoolboy. His main vice was gambling in low company. That is the point in the incident of his mistaking Maron for Simon. Pollux informs us that Simon was one of the names for a cast of dice. ]
The Schoolmaster.
Scene : A School for Boys, in which there are statues of the Muses. Lampriscus, the master, is seated there. Enter Metrottma, dragging her unwilling son Kottalos.
Metrotima —May the dear Muses send you something to enjoy, and may you have pleasure in life ; so you will promise to drub this boy of mine, till the soul of him, drat it, is left nowhere in his body but the lips. He has ruined me by play ing pitch and toss. Yes, Lampriscus, it seems that knuckle
[Addresses
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS. 331
bones are not enough for him; but he must needs be running after worse mischief. Where the door of the grammar-master stands, or when the cursed tax-day comes round — let me scream like Nannakos — he cannot tell. But the gambling place, where street porters and runaways take up their quarters, is so well known to him that he will point it out to strangers. The un happy tablets, which I take the pains to spread with wax each month, lie abandoned by his bedpost next the wall, unless per chance he casts a glance on them as though they were the devil; and then, instead of writing something nice, he rubs them bare. His dice — that litter about among the bellows and the nets — are shinier than our oil-flask which we use for everything. But as for spelling out a word, he does not even know his alpha, unless one shouts it five times in his ears. The day before yesterday, when his father was teaching him Maron, what did the pretty fellow do but go and turn Maron into Simon? so that I am driven to call myself a fool for not making him a donkey-boy, instead of putting him to study in the hope of having a support for my declining years. Then if we make him repeat some child's speech — I, or his father, an old man with bad eyes and deaf — the words run out of his head like water from a bottle with a hole in it. " Apollo, the hunter ! " I cry out ; " even your granny will recite what one asks, and yet she has no schooling — or the first Phrygian you meet upon the road. "
But it's no use scolding, for if we go on, he runs away from home, stays out three days and nights, sponging upon his grandmother, a poor old blind woman and destitute ; or else he squats up there upon the roof, with his legs stretched out, like a tame ape, peering down. Just fancy what his wretched mother suffers in her entrails when she sees him there. I don't care so much about him indeed. But he smashes all the roofing into broken biscuits ; and, when winter comes, I have to pay two shillings for each tile, with tears of anger in my eyes. All the neighbors sing the same old song : "Yonder's the work of master Kottalos, that boy of Metro- tima's. " And true it is ; and I daren't wag a tooth in answer. Look at his back, too, how he's scratched it all over in the wood, till he's no better than a Delian fisher with the creel, who doits his life away at sea. Yet he casts feast days and holidays better than a professional star-gazer ; not even sleep will catch him forgetting when you're off your guard. So I beseech you,
332 THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
Lampriscus, and may these blessed ladies give you prosperous life, and may you light on lucky days, do not . . .
Lampriscus — Nay, Metrotima, you need not swear at him ; it will not make him get the less. [Calls to his pupils. ] Eu- thies, where are you ? Ho, Kokkalos ! ho, Phillos ! Hurry up, and hoist the urchin on your shoulders ; show his rump to
the full moon, I say !
ways of going on, Kottalos — fine ways, forsooth ! It's not enough for you to cast dice, like the other boys here ; but you must needs be running to the gambling house and tossing cop pers with the common porters! I'll make you more modest than a girl. You shan't stir a straw even, if that's what you want. Where is my cutting switch, the bull's tail, with which I lamm into jail-birds and good-for-nothings. Give it me quick, before I hawk my bile up.
[Addresses Kottalos. ]
I commend your
Kottalos — Nay, prithee, Lampriscus, I pray you by the Muses, by your beard, by the soul of Kottis, do not flog me with that cutting, but the other switch.
Lampriscus — But, Kottalos, you are so gone in wickedness that there's not a slave-dealer who'd speak well of you — no, not even in some savage country where the mice gnaw iron.
Kottalos — How many stripes, Lampriscus ; tell me, I beg, how many are you going to lay on ?
Lampriscus — Don't ask me — ask her.
Kottalos — Oh ! oh ! how many are you going to give me, if I can last out alive?
Metrotima — As many as the cruel hide can bear, I tell you.
— [Lampriscus begins to flog the boy. ] Stop, stop, I've had enough, Lampriscus.
Kottalos
Lampriscus — Do you then stop your naughtiness !
Kottalos — Never, never again will I be naughty. I swear,
Lampriscus, by the dear Muses.
Metrotima — What a tongue you've got in your head, you !
I'll shut your mouth up with a gag if you go on bawling. Kottalos — Nay, then, I am silent. Please don't murder
me !
Lampriscus — Let him go, Kokkalos.
Metrotima — Don't stop, Lampriscus, flog him till the sun
goes down —
Lampriscus — But he's more mottled than a water-snake —
Metrotima — And he ought to get at least twenty more — Lampriscus — In addition to his book ? —
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS. 333
Metrotima — Even though he learned to read better than Clio herself.
Kottalos — Yah ! yah !
[The boy has been let loose, and is showing signs of indecent
Metrotima — Stop your jaw till you've rinsed it with honey. I shall make a careful report of this to my old man, Lampris- cus, when I get home ; and shall come back quickly with fet ters ; we'll clamp his feet together ; then let him jump about for the Muses he hated to look down on.
(Translation in Contemporary Review. )
A Jealous Woman.
Bitinna, the mistress (mother of Batyllis). Gastron, Pyrrhias,
Drachon, Cydilla, slaves.
The scene is in the house of Bitinna ; Bitinna and Gastron are alone.
Bitinna —
So, Gastron, so ! Thou canst not be
Content, it seems, to fondle me ? So proud, thou must to Menon's go
For Amphytaea ! Gastron —
Your Amphytaea.
The woman. . . . Bitinna —
The truth! Gastron —
Ma'am, I know . . . I have seen.
Talk, talk, talk, to screen
Ah, use me as you may,
Your slave ; but cease to drink by day And night my very life-blood !
Bitinna —
So big of tongue !
Cydilla !
Oh, Cydilla, ho !
[Enter Cydilla. ] Find him
Where is Pyrrhias ?
And bring him. [Cydilla runs off and instantly re
turns with Pyrrhias. ] Pyrrhias —
What's your pleasure ? Bitinna [pointing to Gattron] —
Bind him !
Quick, whip the pulley off the pail, And do it. [Exit Pyrrhias.
To Gastron. ]
Sirrah, if I fail
334
THE MIMES OF HERON DAS.
To make thee an instructive case Of torture, call me to my face No woman, no, nor half a man. 'Twas I that did
The mischief, when Gastron, for human.
am no more the fool, Thou think'st me.
trow,
[Pyrrhias returns with the bucket strap. ] Now Strip him and bind him.
Gastron — Mercy! oh Bitinna, mercy
Bitinna — Strip him. [To Gastron. ] Thou art my slave, my chattel, made
sinned but catch me in fresh Infraction of your will or way — Then have me branded
Bitinna — Better pray To Amphytaea Boll at her
Those eyes, who pleases to prefer
My foot-rug for her pillow Ugh Pyrrhias —
Please you, he's fastened.
Bitinna — Mark him, you,
If he slips out. Take him away
To Hermon's whipping-house and say, He to have two thousand, one Thousand upon the back, and one
Upon the belly —
Oastron — Must
Madam, to death, before you know
So much as the alleged transgression Be proven
began
treated thee, Thou shalt see.
[Calling to Pyeehias. ] Come, hast got
Know,
Mine for three dollars duly paid.
And cursed be that detested day
Which brought thee here What Pyrrhias Nay, My eye on thee.
Call that a binding
It in and through
His arms off.
Gastron —
Pardon, pardon but This once, my lady. Being flesh,
Look alive
Tighter Drive
I'll have cut
go,
. if ?
!
!
is
I! a ;
! it! !
!
it ! ?
!
I
II
;
is
!
?
it, II
!
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS. 335
Bitinna — By your own confession, Your " pardon but this once ! "
Gastron — To cool
Your answer was it spoken.
Bitinna [to Pyrrhias] — Fool,
To stand and stare ! Cydilla, slap The rascal's hideous victual-trap.
Go where I told thee. Quick, depart ; And thou, if Pyrrhias will but start, Go, Drachon, too. Cydilla, slave, 'Twould be considerate if you gave The fiend a rag or so to grace
His passage through the market place. Now, Pyrrhias, I'll repeat it : say From me to Hermon, he's to lay
Two thousand on : a thousand here, And there a thousand. Do you hear ? From this if you one inch deflect, Your person answers the neglect,
And pays with interest. Off !
[Pyrrhias with Gastron begins to go; Bitinna stops him with a
gesture. ']
And please To take him not by Miccale's,Pyrrhias
But straight. {Exeunt and Gastron. ) And one thing I forgot —
Kun, run, Cydilla (he is not Yet far), and call him.
Cydilla [in sudden distress] — Art deaf ? Alas ! she's
Pyrrhias I calling.
Hi ! Ay,
Bitinna —
As hard upon his fellow-slave,
As if the wretch had robbed a grave !
But, Pyrrhias, mark ! Though he is sent Now in your charge to punishment, Cydilla, sure as these are two
[Holding up and shaking at him two of her fingers. ] Within four days shall witness you
Lodged in the jail, and fretting there
Those anklets which you lately wear.
Hark you ! His bonds are to remain So, till you both come back again. Fetch Cosis, the tattooer, who
Must bring his ink and needles too ;
836
HYMN TO ZEUS.
And while we have him, I will see He puts some ornament on thee :
'Twill save a journey. For cat and mouse ! "
Cydilla —
Not now, not now !
To see the happy wedding day
Of your Batyllis, to embrace
Her children, grant one little grace : Pardon this once.
Bitinna — Cydilla! There! Your worries, if you don't take care,
I'll run away ! — Well, folks may scoff; I'll let the deep-dyed rascal off ; Though every woman in the place Might spit contempt upon my face,
" Which is so little royal ! " — Yet, Since he's so liable to forget
He's mortal, he shall have it now
" Equal fine
Nay, mother mine, Oh, as you pray
Cydilla —Writ for reminder on his brow.
This is the twentieth, and before
The Day of Souls come only four. Bitinna —
First, then, I now discharge you ; bless For that, Cydilla, (dear not less
Than my Batyllis she to me ;
These arms have nursed her) ; presently The Banquet of the Dead, with least Expense, will serve your marriage feast.
HYMN TO ZEUS.
By CLEANTHES.
[Stoic philosopher : succeeded Zeus in his school about b. c.
Two words of nonsense are two words too much ; Whole volumes of good sense will never tire. What multitudes of lines hath Homer wrote ! Who ever thought he wrote one line too much ?
Extremes of fortune are true wisdom's test, And he's the wisest man who bears them best
Diphilus.
[Contemporary of Menander and Philemon. ]
From off the farm comes once in every year A cheery ass, to me who love his cheer ; Like hamper burst at once in all its twigs, Bearing libations, oil, meal, honey, figs.
Time, 0 my guest, is a wright who works a curse : He joys in transformations for the worse.
There is no life but evil happenings seize, — Griefs, cares, and robberies, torments and disease ; Death in physician's guise cuts short their number, Filling the victim's closing scene with slumber.
To Bacchus.
0 friend to the wise, to the children of song
Take me with thee, thou wisest and sweetest, along ;
To the humble, the lowly, proud thoughts dost thou bring, For the wretch who has thee is as blithe as a king ;
From the brows of the sage, in thy humorous play,
Thou dost smooth every furrow and wrinkle away ;
To the weak thou giv'st strength, to the mendicant gold, And a slave warmed by thee as a lion is bold.
Suspicious Circumstances.
Wee have in Corinth this good Law in use : If wee see any person keepe great cheere, Wee make inquirie, whether he doe worke, Or if he have Revenues coming in !
If either, then we say no more of him.
But if the Charge exceed his Gaine or Rents, He is forbidden to run on his course ;
If he continue he pays fine
If he want where withal, he at last
Taken by sergeants and in prison cast.
vol. iv. —21
is
;
it,
a
FRAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS.
For to spend much, and never to get aught,
Is cause of much disorder in the world.
One in the nighttime filcheth from the flocks ; Another breaks a house or else a shop ;
A third man gets a share his mouth to stop. To beare a part in this good fellowship,
One feignes a suit his neighbor to molest, Another must false witness beare with him ; But such a crue we utterly detest,
And banish from our citie like the pest.
Philippides.
[Flourished about b. c. 320-300. ]
When you have erred, be glad that you are blamed Thus only is a balanced mind preserved.
It is not hard for those in weakly plight To tell the lusty ones, " Don't misbehave ! " And 'tis no task to blame the fighting fist, But to fight personally is not so easy : Talking is one thing, acting is another.
Desert a Beggar Born.
It grieves me much to see the world so changed, And men of worth, ingenious and well born, Reduced to poverty, while cunning knaves,
The very scum of the people, eat their fish, Bought for two oboli, on plates of silver, Weighing at least a mina ; a few capers,
Not worth three pieces of brass money, served In lordly silver dish, that weighs at least
As much as fifteen drachmas. In times past A little cup presented to the gods
Was thought a splendid offering : but such gifts Are now but seldom seen ; and reason good, — For 'tis no sooner on the altar placed
Than rogues are watching to purloin it thence.
Apollodorus (Caktstius).
[Flourished about b. c 300-260. ]
Make fast your door with bars of iron quite : No architect can build a door so tight
But cat and paramour will get through in spite.
FRAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS. 328
Each one by his deeds should be Illustrious, with humility.
A peaceful life is sweet ; it would be blest And honored, if as peaceful were the rest : But living wild with monkeys one must be A monkey. Oh, the life of misery !
When I was young, I pitied those untimely reft in their bloom ; But now when I see the aged borne along to the tomb,
I weep indeed — but for my fate, not for theirs, is the gloom.
A One-Sided Retort.
I do not scorn, Philinus, old men's ways,
Which may be yours when age has come to you,
But yet our fathers are at disadvantage
In this — Unless your sire does something for you, You rate him, " Haven't you been young yourself ? " But father cannot say in turn to son
When erring — " Haven't you been old yourself ? "
There is a certain hospitable air
In a friend's home that tells me I am welcome;
The porter opens to me with a smile,
The yard dog wags his tail, the servant runs, — Beats up the cushion, spreads the couch, and says
" Sit down, good sir ! " ere I can say I'm weary.
Euphrok.
[Dates unknown. ]
Tell me, all-judging Jove, if this be fair,— To make so short a life so full of care ?
Who by his own profession is distrest,
How should he manage well the public chest ?
Wretch ! find new gods to witness to new lies : Thy perjuries have made the old too wise !
Phcenicides.
[Flourished about b. c. 272. ] A Courtesan and Her Keepers.
So help me Venus ! as I'm fairly sick — Sick to the soul, my Pythias, of this trade —
FRAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS.
No more on't ! I'll be no man's mistress, I ;
Don't talk to me of Destiny — I've done with't ;
I'll hear no prophecies, for mark me well : —
No sooner did I buckle to this business,
Than straight behold a man of war assailed me : He told me of his battles o'er and o'er, — Showed me good stock of scars, but none of cash No, not a doit ; but still he vapored much
Of what a certain prince would do, and talked
Of this and that commission — in the clouds :
By which he gulled me of a twelvemonth's hope, Lived at free cost, and fed me upon love.
At length I sent my man of valor packing,
And a grave son of Physic filled his place :
My house now seemed a hospital of lazars,
And the vile beggar mangled without mercy,
A very hangman bathed in human gore.
My soldier was a prince compared to this,
For his were merry fibs : this son of death Turned everything he touched into a corpse. When Fortune, who had yet good store of spite, Now coupled me to a most learned philosopher; Plenty of beard he had, a cloak withal,
Enough to spare of each, and more maxims, More than I could digest, but money — none ; His sect abhorred it ; 'twas a thing proscribed By his philosophy, an evil root,
And when I asked him for a taste, 'twas poison; Still I demanded and for the reason — That he so slightly prized all in vain
could not wring drachma from his clutches, — Defend me, Heaven, from all philosophers
Posidippus. [Began to exhibit in 289. ]
Our talent gains us much acquaintanceship, Our soul and manners nearly all our friends.
Strato.
[Uncertain probably contemporary of the above. ]
The Learned Servant.
I've harbored he-sphinx and not cook
For, by the gods, he talked to me in riddles, And coined new words that pose me to interpret.
; a
a ;
!
I
a
it,
it ;
FEAGMENTS OF GREEK COMIC POETS.
No sooner had he entered on his office, — Than, eyeing me from head to foot, he cries
" How many mortals hast thou bid to supper ? " Mortals ! quoth I — what tell you me of mortals ? Let Jove decide on their mortality ;
You're crazy, sure : none by that name are bidden. " No table usher, no one to"officiate
As master of the courses ? — No such person ; Moschion and Niceratus and Philinus,
These are my guests and friends, and amongst these
You'll find no table-decker, as
" Gods ! is it possible ? " cried he : Most certain,
I patiently replied. He swelled and huffed,
As forsooth, had done him heinous wrong,
And robbed him of his proper dignity
Ridiculous conceit — " What offering mak'st thou To Erysichthon " he demanded None.
" Shall not the wide-horned ox be felled " " cries he
sacrifice no ox. — "Nor yet a wether
Not by Jove simple sheep, perhaps.
" And what's wether but a sheep " cries he.
I'm plain man, my friend, and therefore speak Plain language " What speak as Homer does And sure cook may use like privilege,
And more than blind poet. " — Not with me:
I'll have no kitchen Homers in my house
So pray discharge yourself. — This said, we parted.
Bato.
[Flourished about b. c. 217. ]
man, you've erred in life 'twould be
Being
A miracle to succeed perpetually.
The Scholar.
Good, good, Sibynna! Ours no art for sluggards to acquire,
Nor should the hour of deepest midnight see Us and our volumes parted still our lamp Upon its oil feeding, and the page
Of ancient lore before us — What, what hath The Sicyonian deduced what school points Have we from him of Chios Sagest Actides
—
And Zopyrinus, what are their traditions
Thus grapple we with mighty tomes of wisdom, Sifting and weighing and digesting all.
Itake it.
?
?
:
? :
;
:I
is
a : a:a ? I !
is
a
a
!
I
aI, if,
: ?
? ? ;
;
:
326 THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
[FLerondas (or Hebodab) flourished probably about b. c. 250. ]
(The first three translated by J. A. Symonds : the comments and abstracts by him also. )
The Go-between.
Scene : A Private House, where Meteioha, a young wife, in the absence of her husband, Mandris, on the sea, is seated alone within reach of a female slave, Thbessa. Gvllis comes to pay a visit.
Metricha — Thressa, some one is knocking at the house door. Won't you run to see whether a visitor has arrived from the country ?
Thressa — Who knocks ?
Gyllis — It's me.
Thressa — Who are you ? Are you afraid to come near ? Gyllis — Well, then, see, I have come up.
Thressa — Who are you, say ?
Q-yllis — Gyllis, the mother of Philaenion.
inside there that I'm here.
Metricha — Invite her in. Who is she ?
Thressa — Gyllis.
Metricha — Grandam Gyllis! [To the slave. ] Turn your
back a minute, girl. [To Gyllis. ] Which of the Fates has coaxed you into coming, Gyllis, to our house ? What brings you here like a deity to mortals ? I verily believe it must be five months or near it since you, Gyllis, even in a dream, so help me Fate, were seen by any one approaching this door.
Gyllis — I live a long way off, child, and in the lanes the mud is up to one's knees ; besides, I have no more strength than a fly. Old age is dragging us down, and the shadow stands anear and waits.
Metricha — Tut, tut ! Don't calumniate time in that way ! You're strong enough yet, Gyllis, to throttle your neighbors.
Gyllis — Jeer on ! That's the way with you young women. Metricha — Pray don't take fire at what I said.
Gyllis — Well, then, my girl, how long do you mean to go on like a widow, in loneliness, wearing out your solitary bed ?
Tell Metricha
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
327
From the day when Mandris set sail for Egypt, ten moons have come and gone, and he does not send you so much as a letter. Truly, he has forgotten, and has drunken at fresh fountains. There, ah, there is the palace of the goddess ! For everything, I tell you, that is found upon this earth, or can be found, grows in abundance there in Egypt : riches, gymnasia, power and might, fair sunny skies, glory, splendid shows, philoso phers, gold, blooming youths, the temple gardens of twin gods, a king of the best, a museum, wine, all the good things one's heart can wish for, women in bevies — I swear by Hades, the heavens above boast not so many stars —lovely, too, as were the goddesses what time they came to Paris for the prize of beauty (may they not hear me saying this But you, poor thing, what your sort of spirit that you sit and warm that chair Will you let old age overtake you unawares, and ashes consume your youth Take another course for two or three days change your mind in jocund mirth set up with some new friend The ship that rides at one anchor not safely
moored. No mortal knows the future. Life uncertain ever. Metricha — What are you talking about
Gyllis — Is there any one near who can overhear us Metricha — None that know of.
Gyllis — Listen, then, to what have come to tell you after all this time Gryllus, the son of Matakine, Pataecius's wife, the fellow who has conquered in five conquests — as boy at the Pythian games, twice at Corinth with youths in bloom, twice at Olympia with full-grown pugilists — he owns pretty fortune, too, without having to stir finger, and as regards the Queen of Love, he seal unbroken. The man I'm talking of saw you at the Descent of Misa fell desperately in love his bowels burned for you and now he will not leave my dwelling night or day, my girl, but makes lament to me, and wheedles, and ready to die of his love-longing. Nay, come, child, Metricha, grant me this one peccadillo. Adjust yourself
to the goddess else will old age, who looks toward you, take you unawares. By doing this you'll get paid twice. See, then, obey my counsels. love you, by the Fates.
Metricha — Gyllis, whiteness of hair blunts the edge of understanding. As hope for the return of Mandris and for Demeter to befriend me, could not have taken words like these from any other woman, but should have taught the lame to sing lame, and turned her out of doors. beg you never to
I
?
is
;
I
I
:
;
:
!
is
is
IIis ? a
;
I ;a
;
aa?
! ). is
?
328 THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
come to me again with messages of this kind. Tales that are fit for wantons, go tell to silly girls. Leave Metricha, Pytho's daughter, to warm her chair. Nobody laughs at Mandris with impunity. But, as they say, that's not what Gyllis needs to hear. [Calling to the slave girl. '] Thressa, rub up the black bowl of whelk ; pour in three pints of pure wine, mix with water, and give it us to drink in a big cup. Here, Gyllis, drink !
[The rest of the dialogue is too corrupt to be translated. But it appears that Gyllis begins to make excuses for her ill-considered embassy, drinks freely, praises the excellence of Metricha's cellar, takes her leave with compliments, and goes off commending herself to more facile damsels.
[The next mime consists of a speech addressed to a Greek jury by the plaintiff in an action brought against a wealthy sea-captain for assault and battery. The plaintiff is himself a low fellow well known to the whole town for his bad life and infamous vocation ; yet he assumes the tone of a practised counsel, breaks out into telling sallies against the character of the defendant, causes the statutes to be read aloud by the clerk of the court, produces a witness, and concludes with a patriotic peroration. The whole piece reads extraordinarily like the parody or burlesque of some Attic oration. ]
The Ruffian.
Scene : A Court of Justice in the town of Cos. Battalos addresses the Jury.
If that fellow, just because he sails the sea or wears a mantle worth three minae, while I abide on land and drag about a threadbare cloak and rotten slippers, is to carry away by force one of my own girls without my consent, and that by night, mark you, — I say the security of the city, gentlemen, will be gone, and what you take such pride in, your inde pendence, will be abolished by Thales. His duty it was, knowing who he is and molded out of what clay, to live as I do, trembling with fear before the very lowest of the burghers. But now those men among you who are shields of the city, and who have far more right to brag about their birth than he — they respect the laws, and not one of the burghers ever cudgeled me, foreigner as I am, nor came to break into my house at night, nor set fire to it with torches, nor carried away
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
329
with force one of my young women. But that Phrygian who is now called Thales, but was formerly Artimnes, gentlemen of the jury, has done all these things, and has had no regard for law or prefect or archon. (Turns to the clerk. ') Well, I sup pose, clerk, you had better take and read the statute on assault with violence ; and do you stop the bung-hole of the water- clock, my friend, till he has finished, so that I may not, as the proverb runs, be throwing good money after bad.
[Battalos makes the clerk read out a passage of the law, while he bids the slave of the court stop the clepsydra, which times the length of his oration. ]
And if a free man assault a slave woman, or carry her away by force, he shall pay double damages.
[The clerk stops reading. Battalos goes on with his speech. ]
Those words, gentlemen of the jury, were written by Chae- rondas, and not by Battalos, the plaintiff in this suit against Thales. If one shall break a door, let him pay a mina, says the lawgiver ; if he strike with the fist, another mina ; if he burn the house or force entrance, a thousand drachmas ; and if he inflict personal injury, the penalty shall be double. For he dwelt in a city, Thales ; but you have no knowledge of any city, nor indeed of how a city is administered. To-day finds you in Bricindera, yesterday in Abdera ; to-morrow, if some one gives you passage money, you will sail maybe to Phaselis. To cut the matter short, gentlemen of the jury, and not to weary you with digressions, I suffered at the hands of Thales what the mouse did when the pitch caught him.
I was pum- meled, the door of my house was broken in (for which I pay a third as rent), and the lintel overhead was burned. [Calls to
the girl who had been carried off by Thales. ] Come hither, Myrtale, you also, and show yourself to all the folk ; don't be ashamed ; imagine to yourself that all the jurymen you're look ing at are fathers, brothers. Just see, gentlemen, how she's been torn from top to bottom, how that unholy rascal tore her to tatters when he dragged her off by force! Old age, to thee be sacrifices made ! Without you, he must have bled for it ! [Turns round to Thales, or to some one in the court who is jeer ing. ] You laugh? Well, I am a ruffian, and I don't deny it, and Battalos is my name, and my grandsire was Sisymbras, and my father Sisymbriscus, and each and all of us whoremasters —
330 THE MIMES OF HERONDA&
there ! but as for pluck, I'd strangle a lion, if the brute were Thales. [Addresses the defendant, Thales. '] Perhaps you are in love with Myrtale ? Nothing wonderful. I love my loaf. Give this, and you shall get that. Or else, by Jupiter, if you are in heat or so, stuff her price into the palm of Battalos ; go take and batter what belongs to you to your own heart's content.
the jury. ] There is still one point, gentlemen of the jury — this is the charge I make against yonder fellow — it remains with you, I say, in the absence of witnesses, to pro nounce sentence by the rules of equity — should he, however, want to put slaves to the test of torture, I am ready to offer myself also. Here, Thales, take and put me to the rack ; only see that the damages are paid into court first. Minos could not make more fair division and distinction by his weighing scales. For the rest, gentlemen of the jury, forget that you are voting for or against Battalos, the brothel keeper. Think that you are acting for all the foreigners established in your town. Now is the time for Cos and Merops to show what they are good for, Thessalus and Herakles the worth of their renown, Asklepios why he removed from Tricca, and for what cause Phoebe gave birth to Leto here. Considering all these matters, hold the helm of justice with right judgment, so that the Phrygian, hav ing felt your lash, may become the better for his punishment, if so be that the proverb transmitted to us from antiquity doth not speak untruth.
[The third mime, which follows, gives us sufficient insight into the behavior of a thoroughly ill-conducted vagabond of a schoolboy. His main vice was gambling in low company. That is the point in the incident of his mistaking Maron for Simon. Pollux informs us that Simon was one of the names for a cast of dice. ]
The Schoolmaster.
Scene : A School for Boys, in which there are statues of the Muses. Lampriscus, the master, is seated there. Enter Metrottma, dragging her unwilling son Kottalos.
Metrotima —May the dear Muses send you something to enjoy, and may you have pleasure in life ; so you will promise to drub this boy of mine, till the soul of him, drat it, is left nowhere in his body but the lips. He has ruined me by play ing pitch and toss. Yes, Lampriscus, it seems that knuckle
[Addresses
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS. 331
bones are not enough for him; but he must needs be running after worse mischief. Where the door of the grammar-master stands, or when the cursed tax-day comes round — let me scream like Nannakos — he cannot tell. But the gambling place, where street porters and runaways take up their quarters, is so well known to him that he will point it out to strangers. The un happy tablets, which I take the pains to spread with wax each month, lie abandoned by his bedpost next the wall, unless per chance he casts a glance on them as though they were the devil; and then, instead of writing something nice, he rubs them bare. His dice — that litter about among the bellows and the nets — are shinier than our oil-flask which we use for everything. But as for spelling out a word, he does not even know his alpha, unless one shouts it five times in his ears. The day before yesterday, when his father was teaching him Maron, what did the pretty fellow do but go and turn Maron into Simon? so that I am driven to call myself a fool for not making him a donkey-boy, instead of putting him to study in the hope of having a support for my declining years. Then if we make him repeat some child's speech — I, or his father, an old man with bad eyes and deaf — the words run out of his head like water from a bottle with a hole in it. " Apollo, the hunter ! " I cry out ; " even your granny will recite what one asks, and yet she has no schooling — or the first Phrygian you meet upon the road. "
But it's no use scolding, for if we go on, he runs away from home, stays out three days and nights, sponging upon his grandmother, a poor old blind woman and destitute ; or else he squats up there upon the roof, with his legs stretched out, like a tame ape, peering down. Just fancy what his wretched mother suffers in her entrails when she sees him there. I don't care so much about him indeed. But he smashes all the roofing into broken biscuits ; and, when winter comes, I have to pay two shillings for each tile, with tears of anger in my eyes. All the neighbors sing the same old song : "Yonder's the work of master Kottalos, that boy of Metro- tima's. " And true it is ; and I daren't wag a tooth in answer. Look at his back, too, how he's scratched it all over in the wood, till he's no better than a Delian fisher with the creel, who doits his life away at sea. Yet he casts feast days and holidays better than a professional star-gazer ; not even sleep will catch him forgetting when you're off your guard. So I beseech you,
332 THE MIMES OF HERONDAS.
Lampriscus, and may these blessed ladies give you prosperous life, and may you light on lucky days, do not . . .
Lampriscus — Nay, Metrotima, you need not swear at him ; it will not make him get the less. [Calls to his pupils. ] Eu- thies, where are you ? Ho, Kokkalos ! ho, Phillos ! Hurry up, and hoist the urchin on your shoulders ; show his rump to
the full moon, I say !
ways of going on, Kottalos — fine ways, forsooth ! It's not enough for you to cast dice, like the other boys here ; but you must needs be running to the gambling house and tossing cop pers with the common porters! I'll make you more modest than a girl. You shan't stir a straw even, if that's what you want. Where is my cutting switch, the bull's tail, with which I lamm into jail-birds and good-for-nothings. Give it me quick, before I hawk my bile up.
[Addresses Kottalos. ]
I commend your
Kottalos — Nay, prithee, Lampriscus, I pray you by the Muses, by your beard, by the soul of Kottis, do not flog me with that cutting, but the other switch.
Lampriscus — But, Kottalos, you are so gone in wickedness that there's not a slave-dealer who'd speak well of you — no, not even in some savage country where the mice gnaw iron.
Kottalos — How many stripes, Lampriscus ; tell me, I beg, how many are you going to lay on ?
Lampriscus — Don't ask me — ask her.
Kottalos — Oh ! oh ! how many are you going to give me, if I can last out alive?
Metrotima — As many as the cruel hide can bear, I tell you.
— [Lampriscus begins to flog the boy. ] Stop, stop, I've had enough, Lampriscus.
Kottalos
Lampriscus — Do you then stop your naughtiness !
Kottalos — Never, never again will I be naughty. I swear,
Lampriscus, by the dear Muses.
Metrotima — What a tongue you've got in your head, you !
I'll shut your mouth up with a gag if you go on bawling. Kottalos — Nay, then, I am silent. Please don't murder
me !
Lampriscus — Let him go, Kokkalos.
Metrotima — Don't stop, Lampriscus, flog him till the sun
goes down —
Lampriscus — But he's more mottled than a water-snake —
Metrotima — And he ought to get at least twenty more — Lampriscus — In addition to his book ? —
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS. 333
Metrotima — Even though he learned to read better than Clio herself.
Kottalos — Yah ! yah !
[The boy has been let loose, and is showing signs of indecent
Metrotima — Stop your jaw till you've rinsed it with honey. I shall make a careful report of this to my old man, Lampris- cus, when I get home ; and shall come back quickly with fet ters ; we'll clamp his feet together ; then let him jump about for the Muses he hated to look down on.
(Translation in Contemporary Review. )
A Jealous Woman.
Bitinna, the mistress (mother of Batyllis). Gastron, Pyrrhias,
Drachon, Cydilla, slaves.
The scene is in the house of Bitinna ; Bitinna and Gastron are alone.
Bitinna —
So, Gastron, so ! Thou canst not be
Content, it seems, to fondle me ? So proud, thou must to Menon's go
For Amphytaea ! Gastron —
Your Amphytaea.
The woman. . . . Bitinna —
The truth! Gastron —
Ma'am, I know . . . I have seen.
Talk, talk, talk, to screen
Ah, use me as you may,
Your slave ; but cease to drink by day And night my very life-blood !
Bitinna —
So big of tongue !
Cydilla !
Oh, Cydilla, ho !
[Enter Cydilla. ] Find him
Where is Pyrrhias ?
And bring him. [Cydilla runs off and instantly re
turns with Pyrrhias. ] Pyrrhias —
What's your pleasure ? Bitinna [pointing to Gattron] —
Bind him !
Quick, whip the pulley off the pail, And do it. [Exit Pyrrhias.
To Gastron. ]
Sirrah, if I fail
334
THE MIMES OF HERON DAS.
To make thee an instructive case Of torture, call me to my face No woman, no, nor half a man. 'Twas I that did
The mischief, when Gastron, for human.
am no more the fool, Thou think'st me.
trow,
[Pyrrhias returns with the bucket strap. ] Now Strip him and bind him.
Gastron — Mercy! oh Bitinna, mercy
Bitinna — Strip him. [To Gastron. ] Thou art my slave, my chattel, made
sinned but catch me in fresh Infraction of your will or way — Then have me branded
Bitinna — Better pray To Amphytaea Boll at her
Those eyes, who pleases to prefer
My foot-rug for her pillow Ugh Pyrrhias —
Please you, he's fastened.
Bitinna — Mark him, you,
If he slips out. Take him away
To Hermon's whipping-house and say, He to have two thousand, one Thousand upon the back, and one
Upon the belly —
Oastron — Must
Madam, to death, before you know
So much as the alleged transgression Be proven
began
treated thee, Thou shalt see.
[Calling to Pyeehias. ] Come, hast got
Know,
Mine for three dollars duly paid.
And cursed be that detested day
Which brought thee here What Pyrrhias Nay, My eye on thee.
Call that a binding
It in and through
His arms off.
Gastron —
Pardon, pardon but This once, my lady. Being flesh,
Look alive
Tighter Drive
I'll have cut
go,
. if ?
!
!
is
I! a ;
! it! !
!
it ! ?
!
I
II
;
is
!
?
it, II
!
THE MIMES OF HERONDAS. 335
Bitinna — By your own confession, Your " pardon but this once ! "
Gastron — To cool
Your answer was it spoken.
Bitinna [to Pyrrhias] — Fool,
To stand and stare ! Cydilla, slap The rascal's hideous victual-trap.
Go where I told thee. Quick, depart ; And thou, if Pyrrhias will but start, Go, Drachon, too. Cydilla, slave, 'Twould be considerate if you gave The fiend a rag or so to grace
His passage through the market place. Now, Pyrrhias, I'll repeat it : say From me to Hermon, he's to lay
Two thousand on : a thousand here, And there a thousand. Do you hear ? From this if you one inch deflect, Your person answers the neglect,
And pays with interest. Off !
[Pyrrhias with Gastron begins to go; Bitinna stops him with a
gesture. ']
And please To take him not by Miccale's,Pyrrhias
But straight. {Exeunt and Gastron. ) And one thing I forgot —
Kun, run, Cydilla (he is not Yet far), and call him.
Cydilla [in sudden distress] — Art deaf ? Alas ! she's
Pyrrhias I calling.
Hi ! Ay,
Bitinna —
As hard upon his fellow-slave,
As if the wretch had robbed a grave !
But, Pyrrhias, mark ! Though he is sent Now in your charge to punishment, Cydilla, sure as these are two
[Holding up and shaking at him two of her fingers. ] Within four days shall witness you
Lodged in the jail, and fretting there
Those anklets which you lately wear.
Hark you ! His bonds are to remain So, till you both come back again. Fetch Cosis, the tattooer, who
Must bring his ink and needles too ;
836
HYMN TO ZEUS.
And while we have him, I will see He puts some ornament on thee :
'Twill save a journey. For cat and mouse ! "
Cydilla —
Not now, not now !
To see the happy wedding day
Of your Batyllis, to embrace
Her children, grant one little grace : Pardon this once.
Bitinna — Cydilla! There! Your worries, if you don't take care,
I'll run away ! — Well, folks may scoff; I'll let the deep-dyed rascal off ; Though every woman in the place Might spit contempt upon my face,
" Which is so little royal ! " — Yet, Since he's so liable to forget
He's mortal, he shall have it now
" Equal fine
Nay, mother mine, Oh, as you pray
Cydilla —Writ for reminder on his brow.
This is the twentieth, and before
The Day of Souls come only four. Bitinna —
First, then, I now discharge you ; bless For that, Cydilla, (dear not less
Than my Batyllis she to me ;
These arms have nursed her) ; presently The Banquet of the Dead, with least Expense, will serve your marriage feast.
HYMN TO ZEUS.
By CLEANTHES.
[Stoic philosopher : succeeded Zeus in his school about b. c.
