t will be one o' the
players!
Ben Jonson - The Devil's Association
cience
Tells mee, I haue profited the cau? e of Hell 25
But little, in the breaking-off their loues.
Which, if some other act of mine repaire not,
I ? hall heare ill of in my accompt.
Fitz-dottrel _enters with his wife as come downe_.
FIT. O, Bird!
Could you do this? 'gain? t me? and at this time, now?
When I was ? o imploy'd, wholly for you, 30
Drown'd i' my care (more, then the land, I ? weare,
I'haue hope to win) to make you peere-le? ? e? ? tudying,
For footemen for you, fine pac'd hui? hers, pages,
To ? erue you o' the knee; with what Knights wife,
To beare your traine, and ? it with your foure women 35
In councell, and receiue intelligences,
From forraigne parts, to dre? ? e you at all pieces!
Y'haue (a'mo? t) turn'd my good affection, to you;
Sowr'd my ? weet thoughts; all my pure purpo? es:
I could now finde (i' my very heart) to make 40
Another, _Lady Dutche? ? e_; and depo? e you.
Well, goe your waies in. _Diuell_, you haue redeem'd all.
I doe forgiue you. And I'll doe you good.
[404] SD. om. SN. ] FITZ-DOTTRELL _appears at his Wife's back_. G
[405] 8 SN. om. G || you,] you, you, W, G
[406] 11 are. ] are--W, G
[407] 13 Sir. ] Sir--Ed.
[408] 16 I will W, G
[409] 16 SN. ] [_Strikes Mrs. Fitz. and leads her out. _ G
[410] 17 my 1641
[411] 22 th'iniquity G
[412] 23 SN. om [_Exit. _ SCENE III. _Another Room in_ Fitzdottrel's
_House. Enter_ PUG. G
[413] 28 in om. 1641 || SN. ] _Enter_ FITZDOTTREL _and his wife_. G
[414] 30 employ'd 1716, f.
[415] 31, 32 () ret. G
[416] 38 You've 1716, f. || almost W, G
[417] 42 [_Exit Mrs. Fitz. _] G
[418] 43 [_Exit Pug. _ G
ACT. II. SCENE. VIIJ.
MERE-CRAFT. FITZ-DOTTREL. INGINE.
TRAINES.
Why ha you the? e excur? ions? where ha' you beene, Sir? [126]
FIT. Where I ha' beene vex'd a little, with a toy!
MER. O Sir! no toyes mu? t trouble your graue head,
Now it is growing to be great. You mu? t
Be aboue all tho? e things.
FIT. Nay, nay, ? o I will. 5
MER. Now you are to'ard the Lord, you mu? t put off
The man, Sir.
ING. He ? aies true.
MER. You mu? t do nothing
As you ha' done it heretofore; not know,
Or ? alute any man.
ING. That was your bed-fellow,
The other moneth.
MER. The other moneth? the weeke. 10
Thou do? t not know the priueledges, _Ingine_,
Follow that Title; nor how ? wift: To day,
When he has put on his Lords face once, then--
FIT. Sir, for the? e things I ? hall doe well enough,
There is no feare of me. But then, my wife is 15
Such an vntoward thing! ? hee'll neuer learne
How to comport with it. I am out of all
Conceipt, on her behalfe.
MER. Be? t haue her taught, Sir.
FIT. Where? Are there any Schooles for _Ladies_? Is there
An _Academy_ for women? I doe know, 20
For men, there was: I learn'd in it, my ? elfe,
To make my legges, and doe my po? tures.
ING. Sir.
Doe you remember the conceipt you had--
O' the Spani? h gowne, at home?
Ingine _whi? pers_ Merecraft, Merecraft _turnes to_ Fitz-dottrel.
MER. Ha! I doe thanke thee,
With all my heart, deare _Ingine_. Sir, there is 25
A certaine _Lady_, here about the Towne,
An _Engli? h_ widdow, who hath lately trauell'd,
But ? hee's call'd the _Spaniard_; cau? e ? he came
Late? t from thence: and keepes the _Spani? h_ habit.
Such a rare woman! all our women heere, 30
That are of ? pirit, and fa? hion flocke, vnto her,
As to their Pre? ident; their _Law_; their _Canon_;
More then they euer did, to _Oracle-Foreman_.
Such rare receipts ? hee has, Sir, for the face;
Such _oyles_; such _tinctures_; such _pomatumn's_; 35
Such _perfumes_; _med'cines_; _quinte? ? ences_, _&c. _
And ? uch a Mi? tre? ? e of behauiour; [127]
She knowes, from the _Dukes_ daughter, to the Doxey,
What is their due iu? t: and no more!
FIT. O Sir!
You plea? e me i' this, more then mine owne greatne? ? e, 40
Where is ? hee? Let vs haue her.
MER. By your patience,
We mu? t v? e meanes; ca? t how to be acquainted--
FIT. Good, S^r, about it.
MER. We mu? t think how, fir? t.
FIT. O!
I doe not loue to tarry for a thing,
When I haue a mind to't. You doe not know me. 45
If you doe offer it.
MER. Your wife mu? t ? end
Some pretty token to her, with a complement,
And pray to be receiu'd in her good graces,
All the great _Ladies_ do't.
FIT. She ? hall, ? he ? hall,
What were it be? t to be?
MER. Some little toy, 50
I would not haue it any great matter, Sir:
A _Diamant_ ring, of _forty_ or _fifty_ pound,
Would doe it hand? omely: and be a gift
Fit for your wife to ? end, and her to take.
FIT. I'll goe, and tell my wife on't, ? treight. 55
Fitz-dottrel _goes out_.
MER. Why this
Is well! The clothes we'haue now: But, where's this _Lady_?
If we could get a witty boy, now, _Ingine_;
That were an excellent cracke: I could in? truct him,
To the true height. For any thing takes this _dottrel_.
ING. Why, Sir your be?
t will be one o' the players! 60
MER. No, there's no tru? ting them. They'll talke on't,
And tell their _Poets_.
ING. What if they doe? The ie? t
will brooke the Stage. But, there be ? ome of 'hem
Are very hone? t Lads. There's _Dicke Robin? on_
A very pretty fellow, and comes often 65
To a Gentlemans chamber, a friends of mine. We had
The merrie? t ? upper of it there, one night,
The Gentlemans Land-lady invited him
To'a Go? ? ips fea? t. Now, he Sir brought _Dick Robin? on_,
Dre? t like a Lawyers wife, among? t 'hem all; 70
(I lent him cloathes) but, to ? ee him behaue it;
And lay the law; and carue; and drinke vnto 'hem;
And then talke baudy: and ? end frolicks! o!
It would haue bur? t your buttons, or not left you
A ? eame.
MER. They ? ay hee's an ingenious youth! 75
ING. O Sir! and dre? ? es him? elfe, the be? t! beyond
Forty o' your very _Ladies_! did you ne'r ? ee him?
MER. No, I do ? eldome ? ee tho? e toyes. But thinke you,
That we may haue him?
ING. Sir, the young Gentleman
I tell you of, can command him. Shall I attempt it? 80
MER. Yes, doe it.
_Enters againe. _
FIT. S'light, I cannot get my wife
To part with a ring, on any termes: and yet,
The ? ollen _Monkey_ has two.
MER. It were 'gainst rea? on
That you ? hould vrge it; Sir, ? end to a Gold-? mith, [128]
Let not her lo? e by't.
FIT. How do's ? he lo? e by't? 85
Is't not for her?
MER. Make it your owne bounty,
It will ha' the better ? ucce? ? e; what is a matter
Of _fifty_ pound to you, S^r.
FIT. I'haue but a hundred
_Pieces_, to ? hew here; that I would not breake--
MER. You ? hall ha' credit, Sir. I'll ? end a ticket 90
Vnto my Gold-? mith. Heer, my man comes too,
To carry it fitly. How now, _Traines_? What birds?
Traines _enters_.
TRA. Your Cou? in _Euer-ill_ met me, and has beat mee,
Becau? e I would not tell him where you were:
I thinke he has dogd me to the hou? e too.
FIT. Well-- 95
You ? hall goe out at the back-doore, then, _Traines_.
You mu? t get _Guilt-head_ hither, by ? ome meanes:
TRA. 'Tis impo? ? ible!
FIT. Tell him, we haue _veni? on_,
I'll g' him a piece, and ? end his wife a _Phe? ant_.
TRA. A Forre? t moues not, till that _forty_ pound, 100
Yo' had of him, la? t, be pai'd. He keepes more ? tirre,
For that ? ame petty ? umme, then for your bond
Of _? ixe_; and _Statute_ of _eight_ hundred!
FIT. Tell him
Wee'll hedge in that. Cry vp _Fitz-dottrell_ to him,
Double his price: Make him a man of mettall. 105
TRA. That will not need, his bond is current inough.
[419] SD. ACT. . . . ] om. _Enter_ MEERCRAFT _and_ ENGINE. G || II]
III 1641
[420] 6,7 Now . . . Sir. ] "Now . . . sir. " W
[421] 24 SN. ] [_whispers Meercraft. _] G
[422] 28 she is W, G
[423] 29 and om. 1641
[424] 31 fashion flocke,] fashion, flock 1692, f.
[425] 36 &c. ] _et caetera_; G
[426] 45 to it G
[427] 49 do it G
[428] 52 _Diamond_ 1692, 1716 diamond W, G passim
[429] 55 SN. ] [_Exit. _ G
[430] 61 of it G
[431] 64 _Dick_ 1692, 1716 Dick W Dickey G
[432] 66 friend W, G
[433] 69 T'a 1716, W
[434] 81 SN. . . . ] Fit. . . . 1716 Fitz-dottrel . . . W
_Re-enter_ FITZDOTTREL. G
[435] 83 sullen 1692, f.
[436] 85, 6 't] it G
[437] 92 SN. ] _Enter_ TRAINS. G
[438] 95, 103 FIT. ] _Meer. _ W, G
[439] 98 'T] It G
[440] 99 gi' 1716, W give G [_Exit. _ G
[441] 106 [_Exeunt. _ G
ACT. III. SCENE. I. [129]
GVILT-HEAD. PLVTARCHVS.
All this is to make you a Gentleman:
I'll haue you learne, Sonne. Wherefore haue I plac'd you
With S^r. _Poul Either-? ide_, but to haue ? o much Law
To keepe your owne? Be? ides, he is a _Iu? tice_,
Here i' the Towne; and dwelling, Sonne, with him, 5
You ? hal learne that in a yeere, ? hall be worth twenty
Of hauing ? tay'd you at _Oxford_, or at _Cambridge_,
Or ? ending you to the _Innes_ of _Court_, or _France_.
I am call'd for now in ha? te, by Ma? ter _Meere-craft_
To tru? t Ma? ter _Fitz-dottrel_, a good man: 10
I'haue inquir'd him, eighteene hundred a yeere,
(His name is currant) for a diamant ring
Of forty, ? hall not be worth thirty (thats gain'd)
And this is to make you a Gentleman!
PLV. O, but good father, you tru? t too much!
GVI. Boy, boy, 15
We liue, by finding fooles out, to be tru? ted.
Our ? hop-bookes are our pa? tures, our corn-grounds,
We lay 'hem op'n for them to come into:
And when wee haue 'hem there, wee driue 'hem vp
In t'one of our two Pounds, the _Compters_, ? treight, 20
And this is to make you a Gentleman!
Wee Citizens neuer tru? t, but wee doe coozen:
For, if our debtors pay, wee coozen them;
And if they doe not, then we coozen our ? elues.
But that's a hazard euery one mu? t runne, 25
That hopes to make his Sonne a Gentleman!
PLV.
Tells mee, I haue profited the cau? e of Hell 25
But little, in the breaking-off their loues.
Which, if some other act of mine repaire not,
I ? hall heare ill of in my accompt.
Fitz-dottrel _enters with his wife as come downe_.
FIT. O, Bird!
Could you do this? 'gain? t me? and at this time, now?
When I was ? o imploy'd, wholly for you, 30
Drown'd i' my care (more, then the land, I ? weare,
I'haue hope to win) to make you peere-le? ? e? ? tudying,
For footemen for you, fine pac'd hui? hers, pages,
To ? erue you o' the knee; with what Knights wife,
To beare your traine, and ? it with your foure women 35
In councell, and receiue intelligences,
From forraigne parts, to dre? ? e you at all pieces!
Y'haue (a'mo? t) turn'd my good affection, to you;
Sowr'd my ? weet thoughts; all my pure purpo? es:
I could now finde (i' my very heart) to make 40
Another, _Lady Dutche? ? e_; and depo? e you.
Well, goe your waies in. _Diuell_, you haue redeem'd all.
I doe forgiue you. And I'll doe you good.
[404] SD. om. SN. ] FITZ-DOTTRELL _appears at his Wife's back_. G
[405] 8 SN. om. G || you,] you, you, W, G
[406] 11 are. ] are--W, G
[407] 13 Sir. ] Sir--Ed.
[408] 16 I will W, G
[409] 16 SN. ] [_Strikes Mrs. Fitz. and leads her out. _ G
[410] 17 my 1641
[411] 22 th'iniquity G
[412] 23 SN. om [_Exit. _ SCENE III. _Another Room in_ Fitzdottrel's
_House. Enter_ PUG. G
[413] 28 in om. 1641 || SN. ] _Enter_ FITZDOTTREL _and his wife_. G
[414] 30 employ'd 1716, f.
[415] 31, 32 () ret. G
[416] 38 You've 1716, f. || almost W, G
[417] 42 [_Exit Mrs. Fitz. _] G
[418] 43 [_Exit Pug. _ G
ACT. II. SCENE. VIIJ.
MERE-CRAFT. FITZ-DOTTREL. INGINE.
TRAINES.
Why ha you the? e excur? ions? where ha' you beene, Sir? [126]
FIT. Where I ha' beene vex'd a little, with a toy!
MER. O Sir! no toyes mu? t trouble your graue head,
Now it is growing to be great. You mu? t
Be aboue all tho? e things.
FIT. Nay, nay, ? o I will. 5
MER. Now you are to'ard the Lord, you mu? t put off
The man, Sir.
ING. He ? aies true.
MER. You mu? t do nothing
As you ha' done it heretofore; not know,
Or ? alute any man.
ING. That was your bed-fellow,
The other moneth.
MER. The other moneth? the weeke. 10
Thou do? t not know the priueledges, _Ingine_,
Follow that Title; nor how ? wift: To day,
When he has put on his Lords face once, then--
FIT. Sir, for the? e things I ? hall doe well enough,
There is no feare of me. But then, my wife is 15
Such an vntoward thing! ? hee'll neuer learne
How to comport with it. I am out of all
Conceipt, on her behalfe.
MER. Be? t haue her taught, Sir.
FIT. Where? Are there any Schooles for _Ladies_? Is there
An _Academy_ for women? I doe know, 20
For men, there was: I learn'd in it, my ? elfe,
To make my legges, and doe my po? tures.
ING. Sir.
Doe you remember the conceipt you had--
O' the Spani? h gowne, at home?
Ingine _whi? pers_ Merecraft, Merecraft _turnes to_ Fitz-dottrel.
MER. Ha! I doe thanke thee,
With all my heart, deare _Ingine_. Sir, there is 25
A certaine _Lady_, here about the Towne,
An _Engli? h_ widdow, who hath lately trauell'd,
But ? hee's call'd the _Spaniard_; cau? e ? he came
Late? t from thence: and keepes the _Spani? h_ habit.
Such a rare woman! all our women heere, 30
That are of ? pirit, and fa? hion flocke, vnto her,
As to their Pre? ident; their _Law_; their _Canon_;
More then they euer did, to _Oracle-Foreman_.
Such rare receipts ? hee has, Sir, for the face;
Such _oyles_; such _tinctures_; such _pomatumn's_; 35
Such _perfumes_; _med'cines_; _quinte? ? ences_, _&c. _
And ? uch a Mi? tre? ? e of behauiour; [127]
She knowes, from the _Dukes_ daughter, to the Doxey,
What is their due iu? t: and no more!
FIT. O Sir!
You plea? e me i' this, more then mine owne greatne? ? e, 40
Where is ? hee? Let vs haue her.
MER. By your patience,
We mu? t v? e meanes; ca? t how to be acquainted--
FIT. Good, S^r, about it.
MER. We mu? t think how, fir? t.
FIT. O!
I doe not loue to tarry for a thing,
When I haue a mind to't. You doe not know me. 45
If you doe offer it.
MER. Your wife mu? t ? end
Some pretty token to her, with a complement,
And pray to be receiu'd in her good graces,
All the great _Ladies_ do't.
FIT. She ? hall, ? he ? hall,
What were it be? t to be?
MER. Some little toy, 50
I would not haue it any great matter, Sir:
A _Diamant_ ring, of _forty_ or _fifty_ pound,
Would doe it hand? omely: and be a gift
Fit for your wife to ? end, and her to take.
FIT. I'll goe, and tell my wife on't, ? treight. 55
Fitz-dottrel _goes out_.
MER. Why this
Is well! The clothes we'haue now: But, where's this _Lady_?
If we could get a witty boy, now, _Ingine_;
That were an excellent cracke: I could in? truct him,
To the true height. For any thing takes this _dottrel_.
ING. Why, Sir your be?
t will be one o' the players! 60
MER. No, there's no tru? ting them. They'll talke on't,
And tell their _Poets_.
ING. What if they doe? The ie? t
will brooke the Stage. But, there be ? ome of 'hem
Are very hone? t Lads. There's _Dicke Robin? on_
A very pretty fellow, and comes often 65
To a Gentlemans chamber, a friends of mine. We had
The merrie? t ? upper of it there, one night,
The Gentlemans Land-lady invited him
To'a Go? ? ips fea? t. Now, he Sir brought _Dick Robin? on_,
Dre? t like a Lawyers wife, among? t 'hem all; 70
(I lent him cloathes) but, to ? ee him behaue it;
And lay the law; and carue; and drinke vnto 'hem;
And then talke baudy: and ? end frolicks! o!
It would haue bur? t your buttons, or not left you
A ? eame.
MER. They ? ay hee's an ingenious youth! 75
ING. O Sir! and dre? ? es him? elfe, the be? t! beyond
Forty o' your very _Ladies_! did you ne'r ? ee him?
MER. No, I do ? eldome ? ee tho? e toyes. But thinke you,
That we may haue him?
ING. Sir, the young Gentleman
I tell you of, can command him. Shall I attempt it? 80
MER. Yes, doe it.
_Enters againe. _
FIT. S'light, I cannot get my wife
To part with a ring, on any termes: and yet,
The ? ollen _Monkey_ has two.
MER. It were 'gainst rea? on
That you ? hould vrge it; Sir, ? end to a Gold-? mith, [128]
Let not her lo? e by't.
FIT. How do's ? he lo? e by't? 85
Is't not for her?
MER. Make it your owne bounty,
It will ha' the better ? ucce? ? e; what is a matter
Of _fifty_ pound to you, S^r.
FIT. I'haue but a hundred
_Pieces_, to ? hew here; that I would not breake--
MER. You ? hall ha' credit, Sir. I'll ? end a ticket 90
Vnto my Gold-? mith. Heer, my man comes too,
To carry it fitly. How now, _Traines_? What birds?
Traines _enters_.
TRA. Your Cou? in _Euer-ill_ met me, and has beat mee,
Becau? e I would not tell him where you were:
I thinke he has dogd me to the hou? e too.
FIT. Well-- 95
You ? hall goe out at the back-doore, then, _Traines_.
You mu? t get _Guilt-head_ hither, by ? ome meanes:
TRA. 'Tis impo? ? ible!
FIT. Tell him, we haue _veni? on_,
I'll g' him a piece, and ? end his wife a _Phe? ant_.
TRA. A Forre? t moues not, till that _forty_ pound, 100
Yo' had of him, la? t, be pai'd. He keepes more ? tirre,
For that ? ame petty ? umme, then for your bond
Of _? ixe_; and _Statute_ of _eight_ hundred!
FIT. Tell him
Wee'll hedge in that. Cry vp _Fitz-dottrell_ to him,
Double his price: Make him a man of mettall. 105
TRA. That will not need, his bond is current inough.
[419] SD. ACT. . . . ] om. _Enter_ MEERCRAFT _and_ ENGINE. G || II]
III 1641
[420] 6,7 Now . . . Sir. ] "Now . . . sir. " W
[421] 24 SN. ] [_whispers Meercraft. _] G
[422] 28 she is W, G
[423] 29 and om. 1641
[424] 31 fashion flocke,] fashion, flock 1692, f.
[425] 36 &c. ] _et caetera_; G
[426] 45 to it G
[427] 49 do it G
[428] 52 _Diamond_ 1692, 1716 diamond W, G passim
[429] 55 SN. ] [_Exit. _ G
[430] 61 of it G
[431] 64 _Dick_ 1692, 1716 Dick W Dickey G
[432] 66 friend W, G
[433] 69 T'a 1716, W
[434] 81 SN. . . . ] Fit. . . . 1716 Fitz-dottrel . . . W
_Re-enter_ FITZDOTTREL. G
[435] 83 sullen 1692, f.
[436] 85, 6 't] it G
[437] 92 SN. ] _Enter_ TRAINS. G
[438] 95, 103 FIT. ] _Meer. _ W, G
[439] 98 'T] It G
[440] 99 gi' 1716, W give G [_Exit. _ G
[441] 106 [_Exeunt. _ G
ACT. III. SCENE. I. [129]
GVILT-HEAD. PLVTARCHVS.
All this is to make you a Gentleman:
I'll haue you learne, Sonne. Wherefore haue I plac'd you
With S^r. _Poul Either-? ide_, but to haue ? o much Law
To keepe your owne? Be? ides, he is a _Iu? tice_,
Here i' the Towne; and dwelling, Sonne, with him, 5
You ? hal learne that in a yeere, ? hall be worth twenty
Of hauing ? tay'd you at _Oxford_, or at _Cambridge_,
Or ? ending you to the _Innes_ of _Court_, or _France_.
I am call'd for now in ha? te, by Ma? ter _Meere-craft_
To tru? t Ma? ter _Fitz-dottrel_, a good man: 10
I'haue inquir'd him, eighteene hundred a yeere,
(His name is currant) for a diamant ring
Of forty, ? hall not be worth thirty (thats gain'd)
And this is to make you a Gentleman!
PLV. O, but good father, you tru? t too much!
GVI. Boy, boy, 15
We liue, by finding fooles out, to be tru? ted.
Our ? hop-bookes are our pa? tures, our corn-grounds,
We lay 'hem op'n for them to come into:
And when wee haue 'hem there, wee driue 'hem vp
In t'one of our two Pounds, the _Compters_, ? treight, 20
And this is to make you a Gentleman!
Wee Citizens neuer tru? t, but wee doe coozen:
For, if our debtors pay, wee coozen them;
And if they doe not, then we coozen our ? elues.
But that's a hazard euery one mu? t runne, 25
That hopes to make his Sonne a Gentleman!
PLV.
