No More Learning

The success of Free Trade in England for so
many years reminds me of what Barney Thompson,
the bookmaker, said to one of the richest men in
Australia, when the latter was being purse-proud
in the bar of Mack's Hotel after the Geelong Races :
"What's the good of you blowing about yoiir
money? -- a log could have made it when you did. "
At that time England's Free-traders had met with
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? 14 Introduction
no opposition, because no one else had anything
to sell. Frederick's policy of protection pre-
vented any of the sorely needed gold from leaving
Prussia, and resulted in the establishment of all
sorts of industries, notably those of an agricul-
tural nature. These he helped in a novel way,
and one which was of the highest importance, in a
direction the value of which is not only realized
still in Germany, but is being reaped by Germany
at this moment.
Frederick, who, when his reign began, had a
standing army of over eighty thousand men, raised
from a population of little over two millions, saw
that the amount of fighting men which any nation
can put into the field must ultimately depend on its
population, and Prussia's population was a widow's
mite compared with Austria's. Accordingly he
set to work to drain the marshes in his kingdom,
and settle them with foreigners selected for their
sturdiness, who were induced to accept the position
by gifts of land and exemption from taxes for so
many years. When he died Prussia contained five
million inhabitants and seventy-five thousand
square miles.
Frederick enjoys the further fame of being for
his time a very humane prince. He reduced
capital punishment as much as he could, and was
never vindictive in repressing the indiscretions of
well-disposed people.
This was of a piece with his extraordinary toler-
ance in religious matters. He allowed and pro-
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? Introduction 15
tected all creeds. He allowed his subjects to think
as they liked, provided that they let him do as he
liked. He not only restored the Lutherans, whose
religion was the most dynastic of German religions,
to all their liberties and privileges, but he wel-
comed the Jesuits when they were expelled from
other countries, and found a use for them, because
the supply of educators had rim short in his wars.
They acclimatized readily and impressed their
methods even upon Prussian diplomacy.
In spite of all the ravages of his wars, he left
Prussia immensely stronger than when he came to
it; he laid the foundations upon which Bismarck
reared the stately edifice of the new German
Empire, the edifice filled to overflowing with wealth
and prosperity by William II before he com-
menced the mad gamble now in progress -- a gamble
which recalls the prophecy of Mirabeau: "If ever
a foolish prince ascends this throne we shaU see the
formidable giant suddenly collapse, and Prussia
will fall like Sweden. "
Frederick had few pleasiires, except that of hos-
pitality. He liked good living, and for his boon
companions chose men of the highest intellect,.
chiefly Frenchmen. All the world knows of his
almost passionate friendship for Voltaire, tempered
as it was by Voltaire's contempt for Frederick
except as a man of action, and Frederick's con-
tempt for Voltaire except as a man of letters.
When Voltaire came to Frederick as a political
envoy, Frederick laughed at his diplomacy just as
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? i6 Introduction
much as Voltaire laughed at the King's French
verses. How malicious he could be about Voltaire
will be found in the Confessions. D'Alembert
was another friend of Frederick's, and he made
Maupertuis the head of the Berlin Academy.
He was an indefatigable worker. When he died,
it was said of him that his death was the only rest
he ever took in his life. He certainly worked just
as hard till the day of his death, for at eleven
o'clock on his last night he ordered that he should
be waked at four to work. But he died two hours
too soon in the arms of the faithful valet who had
been holding him up since midnight. The last
words he spoke were to ask for his favourite dog,
and to bid them cover it with a quilt.
Of his habits, Mr. W. F. Reddaway, the most
readable of his biographers, wrote:
His habit was to rise at dawn or earlier. The
first three or four hours of the morning were allotted
to toilet, correspondence, a desultory breakfast of
strong coffee and fruit, preceded by a deep draught of
cold water flavoured with fennel leaves, and flute-
playing as an accompaniment to meditation on busi-
ness. Then came one or two hours of rapid work with
his secretaries, followed by parade, audiences, and
perhaps a little exercise. Punctually at noon Freder-
ick sat down to dinner, which was always the chief
social event of the day, and in later life became his only
solid meal. He supervised his kitchen like a depart-
ment of State, He considered and often amended the
bill of fare, which contained the names of the cooks
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? Introduction 17
responsible for every dish. After dinner he marked
with a cross the courses which had merited his ap-
proval. He inspected his household accounts with
minute care and proved himself a master of domestic
economy. The result was a dinner that Voltaire
considered fairly good for a country in which there was
no game, no decent meat, and no spring chickens.
Two hours, sometimes even four, were spent at
table. Occasionally the time was devoted to the dis-
cussion of important business with high officials,
but in general Frederick used it to refresh himself after
his six or seven hours of toil. He ate freely, preferring
highly spiced dishes, drank claret mixed with water,
and talked incessantly. He was a skilful and agree-
able host, putting his guests instantly at their ease, and
by Voltaire's account, calling forth wit in others.
After dismissing the company he returned to his
flute, and then put the final touches to the morning's
business. After this he drank coffee and passed some
two hours in seclusion. During this period he nerved
himself for fresh grappling with affairs by plunging into
literature. In the year 1749 he produced no less
than forty works. About six o'clock he was ready to
receive his lector or to converse with artists and
learned men. At seven began a small concert, in
which Frederick himself used often to perform. Sup-
per followed, but was brief, unless the conversation was
of unusual interest. Otherwise the King went to bed
at about nine o'clock and slept five or six hours. In
later life he gave up suppers, but continued to invite
a few friends for conversation. He then allowed him-
self rather more sleep. In his last years he lost the
power to play his flute, and with it, apparently, the
desire to hear music.
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? 1 8 Introduction
Mr. Reddaway adds that Frederick would not
endure the presence of any woman -- that, strictly
speaking, he had no courtiers, and that his private
secretary, Eichel, whom he worked like a slave,
was never seen by any human being.
Frederick, who wrote a great deal more than
most professional authors, could be really witty,
though much of his wit consisted in drawing atten-
tion to other people's weaknesses -- an easy per-
formance for an absolute monarch, since most men
can do it when they are too drunk to fear the con-
sequences, which may be the origin of the saying
in vino Veritas.
Treitschke gives Frederick a very high rank as
an author, but nothing which Frederick ever wrote
is as readable in a translation as the Confessions
which are given in this volume. The truth is that
eighteenth century writings have to be excellent
before they are readable, because they lack the
human frankness of some other centuries. This
frankness Frederick achieved only in the poorest
of his literary productions, and for this reason
Frederick's fame as an author is dead out of his
own country; he is read only for the light which
he throws upon that cynical, valiant soul which
achieved one of the greatest works in the world --
the creation of Prussia.
A few dates may be useful in following Treitsch-
ke' s life of the great Prussian King, for Treitschke
deals in dicta rather than dates.
Frederick was bom on January 24, 17 12. His
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? X
Introduction 19
mother was a sister of George II. He was eighteen
years old when he tried to flee with Katte to France,
and twenty-eight when his father died in 1740.
He was married in 1733 to Princess EHzabeth of
Brunswick-Bevem, related to the Austrian House.
The Emperor Charles VI, Maria Theresa's father,
died on October 20, 1740, and on December i6th
Frederick entered Silesia with twenty-eight thou-
sand men, with the intention of annexing it. His
victory at MoUwitz, which practically gave him
the coimtry, was fought on April 10, 1741, but
he was not confirmed in it till his victory of
Chotusitz, May 17, 1742, which was followed
on June nth by the Peace of Breslau.
This is called the first Silesian war. In the next
war against Austria, in 1744 (the second Silesian
war), he took Prague, September 16, 1744, but
had to abandon it shortly afterwards. He had
his revenge at his great victories of Hohenfriedberg,
on June 5, 1745, and Sohr, September 30, 1745,
both against the Austrians, and Hennersdorf,
November 23, 1745, against the Austrians and
Saxons combined, while the Prince of Dessau
defeated another Austrian and Saxon army at
Kesselsdorf on December 15th. The second
Silesian war was terminated by the Peace of Dres-
den, signed on Christmas Day, 1745.
On August 29, 1756, Frederick crossed the
Saxon frontier and began the Seven Years' War.
The indecisive battle of Lobositz was fought
between Frederick and the Austrian Marshal
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? 20 Introduction
Browne, and before the end of the year he took
possession of Saxony. On May 6, 1757, he won
the battle of Prague, after enormous losses on both
sides, and blockaded the city; but on June i8th
he lost the great battle of Kollin, and had to raise
the blockade and evacuate Bohemia. On Novem-
ber 5, 1757, he won the great battle of Rossbach,
and a month later another supreme victory at
Leuthen. On the 2 ist, Breslau capitulated to him,
and a week later Liegnitz. But his General,
Lehwaldt, had been defeated by the Russian
General Apraxin at Gross-Jagersdorf on August
30th. In 1758 he marched into Moravia and
besieged Olmiitz, but was compelled to retreat
owing to the capture of a convoy of three or four
thousand wagons by the Austrian General Laudon ;
on August 25th he won the battle of Zomdorf
over the Russians, which ended their campaign,
but on October 14th he was surprised and heavily
defeated by the Austrians at Hochkirch, and on
the same day lost his sister, the Margravine of
Baireuth.
But for the English subsidy of 4,000,000 thalers
Frederick would have been starved out in 1759.
On July 25th his army was defeated by the Rus-
sians at Kay, and on August 12th he saw his army
utterly routed by the combined Austrians and
Russians at Kunersdorf, He lost Dresden by
surrender on September 24th, and on November
23d Finck and his army of 12,000 men laid down
their arms at Maxen.
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? Introduction 21
In the western field things had gone better.
Ferdinand of Brunswick had driven the French
army across the Rhine on June 23, 1758, at
Crefeld, and though the French took Frankfurt
on January 2, 1759, and won a battle at Bergen
on April 13, 1759, they were severely defeated
at Minden, August i, 1759.
On June 23, 1760, a Prussian corps was anni-
hilated at Landeshut and Glatz capitulated on
July 22d. But Frederick won a great victory
over the Austrians under Laudon at Liegnitz on
August 15th, and a hotly contested battle against
the Austrians under Daun at Torgau on Novem-
ber 3d, though Laudon had surprised and captured
the great fortress of Schweidnitz on October ist.
The condition of Prussia at the end of this year
appeared hopeless ; the army had declined to sixty
thousand men, and even more in quality than in
numbers. But on January 5, 1762, the Czarina
Elizabeth of Russia died, and was succeeded by her
nephew, Peter III, the husband of the great
Catherine, who was an idolatrous admirer of
Frederick and at once recalled the Russian army.
Prussia and Russia signed a peace on May 5th,
and an offensive and defensive alliance on June
8th, and Sweden made peace with Prussia at
Hamburg on May 22d.
But in the interval the elder Pitt had been
replaced as Prime Minister of England by the
feeble Bute, who had but one desire -- to terminate
the war as soon as possible, and six months after
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? 22 Introduction
Peter Ill's succession the whole of Russia became
so disgusted with him that on July 9, 1762, he
was deposed by his wife, and a few days later
strangled by her lover, Alexis Orloff. On July
21, 1762, Frederick won a battle over the Aus-
trians at Burkersdorf, and in October captured
Schweidnitz, Before the end of the year a truce
was made which proved to be the end of the Seven
Years' War -- the Peace of Hubertusburg being
signed on February 5, 1763.
Neither Frederick nor the Austrians gained an
inch of territory in the Seven Years' War, but
Austria failed in her object, which was to form a
coalition to crush Frederick, and from this time for-
wards Prussia and Austria were equals and rivals.
It took Frederick twenty-three years, exactly
half his reign, to arrive at this. The other half
was spent almost entirely in peace, though there
was a campaign, and gave Frederick the oppor-
tunity to show his powers of organizing agricul-
tural and commercial enterprises and an economic
system.
The principal events of the latter half of Freder-
ick's reign were the Partition of Poland, the Bava-
rian Succession War, and the foundation of the
League of Princes. In 1772, Frederick persuaded
Austria and Russia to join him in the first Partition
of Poland. His share was of great value to him,
because until he obtained possession of Prussian
Poland, East Prussia was detached from the rest
of the kingdom.
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? Introduction 23
Maria Theresa was only with great difficulty
persuaded by her ambitious son to come into the
arrangement. She complained that they had
aimed at two incompatible objects at once, "to
act in the Prussian fashion, and at the same time to
preserve the semblance of honesty," to which
Frederick sneeringly repUed : ' ' She is always weep-
ing but always annexing. "
The War of the Bavarian Succession in 1778 led
to very little fighting. The main armies were
unable to attack each other, and when the Czarina
threatened to interfere on the Prussian side,
Austria came to terms and made the Peace of
Teschen, May 13, 1779. A year and a half later
Maria Theresa died, leaving the restless Joseph
without any steadying influence. To counter his
attempts to increase the Imperial authority,
Frederick gradually worked up not only the Pro-
testant Princes of the Empire, but even the Cath-
olic ecclesiastical States, to form the League of
Princes (Furstenbund) , which was signed in the
first instance by Brandenburg, Hanover, and
Saxony only, on July 23, 1785. About a year
afterwards, on August 17, 1786, Frederick died
at the age of seventy -foiir.
This Filrstenhund was a fitting conclusion to his
career, for it coincides approximately with the new
German Empire.
Frederick found Prussia the smallest and weak-
est of the Great Powers, and left her equal to any
of them. That should be his epitaph.
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? 24 Introduction
TREITSCHKE's study of FREDERICK THE GREAT
Treitschke's study of Frederick would be inter-
esting if it were only as a tour de force of character
analysis. I think he overestimates the value of
Frederick's Anti-Machiavel and his Letters on
Patriotism, which are practically dead as far as
the foreign reader is concerned; but in other re-
spects his delineation of Frederick is compara-
tively free from the advocate's partisanship which
depreciates Treitschke's value as an historian.
Whether Treitschke would have treated Freder-
ick so impartially if he had been alive now is
doubtful. To give an instance: a couple of pages
after his magnificent summing-up of Frederick's
greatness, he has a paragraph which is about the
strongest condemnation of the present war which
ever came from a German pen :
The love of peace of the House of HohenzoUern
remained alive even in its greatest war-princes.
Frederick valued power, but only as a means for the
well-being and civilization of the nations; that it
should be an end in itself, that the struggle for power
as such should bestow historic fame, seemed to him
as an insult to the honour of a sovereign. Therefore
he wrote his passionate polemic-treatise against
Machiavelli. Therefore, in his writings, he returned
again and again to the terrible warning of Charles XII
of Sweden.
He might have felt secretly that iii his
own breast were working irresistible forces, which
might lead him to similar errors, and was never tired
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? Introduction 25
of portraying the hoUowness of objectless military
fame . . . . Already in his impetuous youth he had
made up his mind about the moral objects of power:
"This State must become strong," he wrote at that
time, "that it may play the lofty rdle of preserving
peace only from love of justice, and not from fear.
But if ever injustice, bias, and vice gain the upper hand
in Prussia, then I wish the House of Brandenburg
a speedy downfall. That says all. "
To show how different from this is the undiluted
Treitschke, one may quote a passage which has
inspired numberless passages in von Bemhardi:
The educational power of war awakened again
in these North-German races above all that rough
pride which once inspirited the invaders of Italy
(Romfahrer) and the conquerors of the Slavs in the
Middle Ages.
And a few sentences later on he talks of the
"descendants of those heroic nations, the Vandals
and the Goths," in the same way as the present
Emperor bade his soldiers emulate the Huns in
an unfortunate speech which has given, through
newspaper-headings, a severe blow to the German
cause in America.
Yet Treitschke, like von Bemhardi, was, when
he was not crusading, very sane and fair. He
writes, for instance: "The alert self-reliance of the
Prussians contrasted strongly with the inoffensive
kindly modesty of the other Germans, " just as the
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? 26 Introduction
war news of to-day often contrasts the Saxons' or
Bavarians' behaviour in Belgium or France with
that of the Prussians. And a Httle lower down
he says: "It was betrayed now in confident brag-
ging, in the thousand satirical anecdotes of Im-
perial stupidity and Prussian Hussar strategisms. "
For which von Hindenburg's name will probably
supply dictionaries with a new word.
Yet you can see in Frederick many signs of the
anticipation of modern Prussian ideas which
make him one of the most interesting figures in
history, as he is one of the greatest figures at the
present time. For in many ways the Prussia of
to-day is the Prussia of Frederick's time come to
life again. It was Frederick who said :
With such soldiers there is no risk : a General who in
other armies would be considered foolhardy, is only
considered with us as doing his duty. [And again he
says :] It seems that Heaven has appointed the King
to make all preparations which wise precautions
before the beginning of a war demand. Who knows,
if Providence has not reserved it for me to make a
glorious use of these war means at some future time,
and to convert them to the realization of the plans for
which the foresight of my fathers intended them?
But I do not agree with Treitschke when he
writes: "It was Frederick's work that . . . a
third tendency should arise, a policy which was
only Prussian, and nothing further: to it Ger-
many's future belonged. " And he writes later
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? Introduction 27
on: "Dohm concluded a clever pamphlet with
these words: 'German and Prussian interests can
never stand in one another's way. ' The discern-
ing mind of the old King was not moved by such
dreams. "
And we know how widely spread the distrust of
Prussia was in Frederick's day, because Goethe,
quoted by Treitschke, tells us that: "Even the
humblest and weakest of the allied States, Weimar
and Dessau, secretly discussed how they could
protect themselves against their Prussian protect-
or's lust of power. "
When Treitschke talks of the moral justification
of the treacherous seizure of Silesia, one is irresist-
ibly reminded of the justification of the present
war by von Bemhardi and others, for the benefi-
cent results likely to happen from the spread of
Prussian Kultur -- the culture which it would be
more reasonable to call the Prussian vulture,
Treitschke damns Frederick's excuses for seizing
Silesia with faint apologies:
He wished to spare Austria, and contented himself
with bringing forward the most important of the
carefully pondered pretensions of his House. Alone,
without vouchsafing one word to the foreign Powers
on the watch, with an overwhelming invading force,
he broke into Silesia. Germany, used to the solemn
reflections and cross-reflections of her Imperial law-
yers, received with astonishment and indignation the
doctrine that the rights of States were only to be
maintained by active power.
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? 28 Introduction
Elsewhere in this book it will be seen how
Frederick excelled himself on this occasion by
ordering Podewils to find excuses because he had
already given orders to his troops. The doctrine
of the active power has been exploited for all it is
worth by von Bernhardi in his Germany and the
Next War.
Treitschke is not very convincing upon the
subject of Poland. His complaints of "the Poles'
horrible outrages in the Weichsel district, with
that insolent disregard of the rights of others and
the nationality of others which distinguishes the
Poles above all the nations of Europe," leaves us
cold, when our paper every morning brings news
of fresh devastation in Poland. And the sentence
in which Treitschke complains that: "Others re-
peated credulously what Poland's old confederates,
the French, invented to stigmatize the partitioning
Powers," simply kills Treitschke 's reputation as
an impartial historian. The world of honest men
has never ceased to condemn the Partition of
Poland, and hailed with almost religious delight
Russia's proclamation that the ancient nation of
the Poles should be reconstituted as a practically
autonomous people under the shield of the Lion
of the East, the great protector of Slav nationality.
Any criticism, which Germany might have to make
on the subject, is discounted by the fact that she
at once proceeded to suggest a German parody of
the movement, a highly improved province to
embrace Russian Poland as well as Prussian Po-
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? Introduction 29
land. And any advantages, which may have been
latent in this suggestion, are rendered difficult of
realization by the Belging of Russian Poland.
The question of the Balance of Power, which is
handled so destructively by von Bernhardi, comes
up a good deal in Treitschke's life of Frederick
the Great. I think von Bernhardi was right, but
I arrive at my conclusions from a standpoint which
he would hardly share. The European balance
of power for many years has been like a wooden
garden fence, whose bottom under the soil has
rotted. From time to time -- the last time was
during and after the Balkan War against Turkey
-- Europe has been on the verge of a conflagration
like the present because Austria has resisted any
intelUgent solution of the Balkan question. Now,
if the war goes as we all hope and believe it will go,
the question will be settled. The Turk, who has
no business in Europe, because he is incapable of
sharing European ideas, will be driven out of
Europe. Russia will have Constantinople, essen-
tial to her as giving her that free entrance to the
Mediterranean which is her right. England will
take the Persian Gulf and make the Euphrates
Valley as prosperous as the Nile Valley, and Egypt
also will be managed in a less anomalous fashion.
Servia wiU have her sea-board on the Adriatic.
Bulgaria, if she is not seduced into sharing the
suicide of Turkey, will have her port on the
iEgean. Greece will get back all the islands in
which the races of ancient Greece, who taught the
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? 30 Introduction
world its civilization, have remained so much
purer than in Athens itself. Rumania will annex
all the Rumanian districts which lie outside of
its present borders, and Italy, if she joins the
Powers of the Triple Entente, will not only get
back the Italian provinces which still remain under
the rule of Austria, but will have a footing on the
Balkan Peninsula, lower down, which will enable
her to fulfil her natural mission of being the channel
of commerce and civilization for all the Balkan
nations.
For many years this has been the natural solu-
tion of the Eastern Question, but Austria has
stood in the way -- Austria, which just as naturally
pictured herself overrunning the Balkan Pen-
insula, and finding her way down to the great
southern port of Salonika. Germany backed up
Austria, in the hope perhaps that Austria, con-
taining so many people of German nationality,
would one day come into the German Empire.
The difficulty was that the Balkan Peninsula was
all in Slav hands or a natural inheritance for the
Slavs. Without conquering Russia, the Austrian
dreams were unrealizable, and rather than allow
the Balkan Slavs to fulfil their mission, Austria
preferred to perpetuate a state of wars and rumours
of wars. Turkey's suicidal entrance into the arena
has rendered a settlement possible.
If Frederick had foreseen this he would doubtless
have left us his warnings on the subject. He was
free enough with his warnings as to the trouble
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? Introduction 31
which might ensue from the restless energy of the
Emperor Joseph the Austrian.
It would not be right for me to conclude this
brief survey of Treitschke's judgment on Frederick
without quoting the intelligent anticipation of the
Dane Bernstorff, writing to Choiseul, one of the
trifling Frenchmen whose employment by Louis
XV rendered Frederick's task so much easier
in his wars with France. "Everything which you
undertake to-day to prevent the rise of an entirely
military Monarchy in the middle of Germany,
whose iron arm will soon crush the minor princes --
is all labour wasted! "
Douglas Sladen.
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? The Confessions of Frederick
the Great
33
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? The Confessions of Frederick
the Great
The spirit of these Confessions and the principles
advocated by Frederick are very closely in line with
the teachings of Treitschke and with the national
policy championed by Bernhardi.
MORNING THE FIRST
ORIGIN OF OUR FAMILY
IN the times of disorder and confusion, amidst
barbarous nations, there was seen to spring up
a new arrangement of sovereignties. The govern-
ors of different countries shook off the yoke of
subjection, and soon became powerful enough to
overawe their masters; they obtained privileges,
or, to come nearer to the truth, it was with the
form of one knee on the ground that they ran
away with the substance. Among those daring
ones, there were several who laid the foundations
of the greatest monarchies; and perhaps, on a
fair calculation, even all the emperors, kings, and
foreign princes at this very time owe their respec-
tive states to them. As for us, we are, most
35
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? 36 The Confessions of
undoubtedly, in that case. I see you blush at this.
I forgive you for once ; but let me advise you never
to play the child so again. Remember, once for
all, that, in matter of kingdoms, he catches them
that can; and that there is no wrong but in the
case of being forced to return them.
The first of our ancestors, who acquired some
rights of sovereignty over the country of which
he was governor, was Tassillon, of Hohenzollern.
The thirteenth of his descendants was Burgrave of
Nuremberg; the twenty-fifth of them was Elector
of Brandenburg, and the thirty-seventh. King of
Prussia. Our family, as well as all the others, has
had its Achilles', its Ciceros, its Nestors, its
drivellers and its drones, its mothers-in-law, and,
without doubt, its women of gallantry. It has
also often aggrandized itself b}^ those kinds of
right, which are only known to princes at once in
luck, and in force enough to exert them; for in
the order of our successions, we see those of con-
veniency, or expectancy, and of protection.
From the time of Tassillon to that of the great
Elector, we did little more than vegetate. We
could, in the empire, reckon fifty princes in no
point inferior to us; and, properly speaking, we
were but one of the branches of the great sconce
or chandelier of the empire. William the Great,
by the splendour of his actions, raised our family
into pre-eminence; and at length, in 1701 (the
date, you see, is not a very ancient one), vanity
placed a crown on the head of my grandfather; and
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? Frederick the Great 37
it is to this epoch that we ought to refer our true
existence, since it put us into a condition of act-
ing on the footing of kings, and of treating, upon
terms of equality, with all the powers of the earth.
Were we to estimate the virtues of our ancestors,
we might easily conclude, that it is not to any
eminence in them that our family owes its aggran-
dizement. The greatest part of our princes
have been rather remarkable for misconduct;
but it was chance and circumstances that have
been of service to us. I would even have you to
observe, that the first diadem that bound our
brows was placed on one of the vainest and lightest
of heads, and that head on a body crooked and
humpbacked.
And here, I am aware, my dear nephew, that
I am leaving you in the dark as to our origin. It
has been pretended that that same Coimt of
Hohenzollern was of a great family; but, in truth,
few ever appeared in the world so bare of titles.
However, at the worst, it is indisputable that we
are of an ancient noble extraction: good, good
gentlemen, in short; let us stick to that.
THE SITUATION OF MY KINGDOM
As to this point, I am not so well off as I could
wish. To convince yourself of which, cast your
eyes over the map, and you will see that the great-
est part of my territories is dispersed or divided in
such a manner, that they cannot mutually assist
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? 38 The Confessions of
each other. I have no great rivers that run
through my provinces; some border upon them,
but few intersect them. ^
OF THE SOIL OF MY TERRITORIES
A third at least of my dominions Hes in waste;
another third is in woods, waters, or marshes.
The third, which is cultivated, produces nor wine,
nor olives, nor mulberry- trees. No fruits nor
garden-stuff come to anything, without great care,
and very few to the true point of perfection. I
have only a" few parts in which the wheat and rye
have some reputation.
OF THE MANNERS OF THE INHABITANTS
Under this head I have nothing particular or
decisive to pronounce, because my kingdom is
but a kind of mosaic, made up of various pieces.
All that I can, with any certainty, say, is, that, in
general, my subjects are hardy and brave, uncuri-
ous as to eating, but fond of drinking ; tyrants on
their estates, and slaves in my service; insipid
lovers, and surly husbands ; of a wondrously cold,
phlegmatic turn, which I take to be at the bottom,
rank stupidity; good civilians, little of philo-
sophers, less of poets, and still less of orators;
' The situation, extent, and soil, of the territories of the great
Frederick, have been wonderfully changed of late years; changed
upon his own principles, too, as will appear hereafter.