No More Learning

EURIPIDES. What have you done, you wretch?

DIONYSUS. I? I have decided that Aeschylus is the victor. What then?

EURIPIDES. And you dare to look me in the face after such a shameful
deed?

DIONYSUS. "Why shameful, if the spectators do not think so? "[535]

EURIPIDES. Cruel wretch, will you leave me pitilessly among the dead?

DIONYSUS. "Who knows if living be not dying,[536] if breathing be not
feasting, if sleep be not a fleece? "[537]

PLUTO. Enter my halls. Come, Dionysus.

DIONYSUS. What shall we do there?

PLUTO. I want to entertain my guests before they leave.

DIONYSUS. Well said, by Zeus; 'tis the very thing to please me best.

CHORUS. Blessed the man who has perfected wisdom! Everything is happiness
for him. Behold Aeschylus; thanks to the talent, to the cleverness he has
shown, he returns to his country; and his fellow-citizens, his relations,
his friends will all hail his return with joy. Let us beware of jabbering
with Socrates and of disdaining the sublime notes of the tragic Muse. To
pass an idle life reeling off grandiloquent speeches and foolish
quibbles, is the part of a madman.

PLUTO. Farewell, Aeschylus! Go back to earth and may your noble precepts
both save our city[538] and cure the mad; there are such, a many of them!
Carry this rope from me to Cleophon, this one to Myrmex and Nichomachus,
the public receivers, and this other one to Archenomous. [539] Bid them
come here at once and without delay; if not, by Apollo, I will brand them
with the hot iron. [540] I will make one bundle of them and
Adimantus,[541] the son of Leucolophus,[542] and despatch the lot into
hell with all possible speed.

AESCHYLUS. I will do your bidding, and do you make Sophocles occupy my
seat. Let him take and keep it for me, against I should ever return here.
In fact I award him the second place among the tragic poets. As for this
impostor, watch that he never usurps my throne, even should he be placed
there in spite of himself.

PLUTO (_to the Chorus of the Initiate_). Escort him with your sacred
torches, singing to him as you go his own hymns and choruses.

CHORUS. Ye deities of the nether world, grant a pleasant journey to the
poet who is leaving us to return to the light of day; grant likewise wise
and healthy thoughts to our city. Put an end to the fearful calamities
that overwhelm us, to the awful clatter of arms. As for Cleophon and the
likes of him, let them go, an it please them, and fight in their own
land. [543]

* * * * *

FINIS OF "THE FROGS"

* * * * *

Footnotes:

[382] These were comic poets contemporary with Aristophanes. Phrynichus,
the best known, gained the second prize with his 'Muses' when the present
comedy was put upon the stage. Amipsias had gained the first prize over
our author's first edition of 'The Clouds' and again over his 'Birds. '
Aristophanes is ridiculing vulgar and coarse jests, which, however, he
does not always avoid himself.

[383] Instead of the expected "son of Zeus," he calls himself the "son of
a wine-jar. "

[384] At the sea-fight at Arginusae the slaves who had distinguished
themselves by their bravery were presented with their freedom. This
battle had taken place only a few months before the production of 'The
Frogs. ' Had Xanthias been one of these slaves he could then have treated
his master as he says, for he would have been his equal.

[385] The door of the Temple of Heracles, situated in the deme of Melite,
close to Athens. This temple contained a very remarkable statue of the
god, the work of Eleas, the master of Phidias.

[386] A fabulous monster, half man and half horse.

[387] So also, in 'The Thesmophoriazusae,' Agathon is described as
wearing a saffron robe, which was a mark of effeminacy.

[388] A woman's foot-gear.

[389] He speaks of him as though he were a vessel. Clisthenes, who was
scoffed at for his ugliness, was completely beardless, which fact gave
him the look of a eunuch. He was accused of prostituting himself.

[390] Heracles cannot believe it. Dionysus had no repute for bravery. His
cowardice is one of the subjects for jesting which we shall most often
come upon in 'The Frogs. '

[391] A tragedy by Euripides, produced some years earlier, some fragments
of which are quoted by Aristophanes in his 'Thesmophoriazusae. '

[392] An actor of immense stature.

[393] The gluttony of Heracles was a byword. See 'The Birds. '

[394] Euripides, weary, it is said, of the ridicule and envy with which
he was assailed in Athens, had retired in his old age to the court of
Archelaus, King of Macedonia, where he had met with the utmost
hospitality. We are assured that he perished through being torn to pieces
by dogs, which set upon him in a lonely spot. His death occurred in 407
B. C. , the year before the production of 'The Frogs. '

[395] This is a hemistich, the Scholiast says, from Euripides.

[396] The son of Sophocles. Once, during his father's lifetime, he gained
the prize for tragedy, but it was suspected that the piece itself was
largely the work of Sophocles himself. It is for this reason that
Dionysus wishes to try him when he is dependent on his own resources, now
that his father is dead. The death of the latter was quite recent at the
time of the production of 'The Frogs,' and the fact lent all the greater
interest to this piece.

[397] Agathon was a contemporary of Euripides, and is mentioned in terms
of praise by Aristotle for his delineation of the character of Achilles,
presumably in his tragedy of 'Telephus. ' From the fragments which remain
of this author it appears that his style was replete with ornament,
particularly antithesis.

[398] Son of Caminus, an inferior poet, often made the butt of
Aristophanes' jeers.

[399] A poet apparently, unknown.

[400] Expressions used by Euripides in different tragedies.

[401] Parody of a verse in Euripides' 'Andromeda,' a lost play.

[402] Heracles, being such a glutton, must be a past master in matters of
cookery, but this does not justify him in posing as a dramatic critic.

[403] Xanthias, bent double beneath his load, gets more and more out of
patience with his master's endless talk with Heracles.

[404] The mortar in which hemlock was pounded.

[405] An allusion to the effect of hemlock.

[406] A quarter of Athens where the Lampadephoria was held in honour of
Athene, Hephaestus, and Prometheus, because the first had given the
mortals oil, the second had invented the lamp, and the third had stolen
fire from heaven. The principal part of this festival consisted in the
_lampadedromia_, or torch-race. This name was given to a race in which
the competitors for the prize ran with a torch in their hand; it was
essential that the goal should be reached with the torch still alight.
The signal for starting was given by throwing a torch from the top of the
tower mentioned a few verses later on.

[407] Theseus had descended into Hades with Pirithous to fetch away
Persephone. Aristophanes doubtless wishes to say that in consequence of
this descent Pluto established a toll across Acheron, in order to render
access to his kingdom less easy, and so that the poor and the greedy, who
could not or would not pay, might be kept out.

[408] Morsimus was a minor poet, who is also mentioned with disdain in
'The Knights,' and is there called the son of Philocles. Aristophanes
jestingly likens anyone who helps to disseminate his verses to the worst
of criminals.

[409] The Pyrrhic dance was a lively and quick-step dance. Cinesias was
not a dancer, but a dithyrambic poet, who declaimed with much
gesticulation and movement that one might almost think he was performing
this dance.

[410] Those initiated into the Mysteries of Demeter, who, according to
the belief of the ancients, enjoyed a kind of beatitude after death.

[411] Xanthias, his strength exhausted and his patience gone, prepares to
lay down his load. Asses were used for the conveyance from Athens to
Eleusis of everything that was necessary for the celebration of the
Mysteries. They were often overladen, and from this fact arose the
proverb here used by Xanthias, as indicating any heavy burden.

[412] The Ancients believed that meeting this or that person or thing at
the outset of a journey was of good or bad omen. The superstition is not
entirely dead even to-day.

[413] Dionysus had seated himself _on_ instead of _at_ the oar.

[414] One of the titles given to Dionysus, because of the worship
accorded him at Nysa, a town in Ethiopia, where he was brought up by the
nymphs.

[415] This was the third day of the Anthesteria or feasts of Dionysus.
All kinds of vegetables were cooked in pots and offered to Dionysus and
Athene. It was also the day of the dramatic contests.

[416] Dionysus' temple, the Lenaeum, was situated in the district of
Athens known as the _Linnae_, or Marshes, on the south side of the
Acropolis.

[417] He points to the audience.

[418] A spectre, which Hecate sent to frighten men. It took all kinds of
hideous shapes. It was exorcised by abuse.

[419] This was one of the monstrosities which credulity attributed to the
Empusa.

[420] He is addressing a priest of Bacchus, who occupied a seat reserved
for him in the first row of the audience.

[421] A verse from the Orestes of Euripides. --Hegelochus was an actor
who, in a recent representation, had spoken the line in such a manner as
to lend it an absurd meaning; instead of saying, [Greek: gal_en_en],
which means _calm_, he had pronounced it [Greek: gal_en], which means _a
cat_.

[422] The priest of Bacchus, mentioned several verses back.

[423] High-flown expressions from Euripides' Tragedies.

[424] A second Chorus, comprised of Initiates into the Mysteries of
Demeter and Dionysus.

[425] A philosopher, a native of Melos, and originally a dithyrambic
poet. He was prosecuted on a charge of atheism.

[426] A comic and dithyrambic poet.

[427] This Thorycion, a toll collector at Aegina, which then belonged to
Athens, had taken advantage of his position to send goods to Epidaurus,
an Argolian town, thereby defrauding the treasury of the duty of 5 per
cent, which was levied on every import and export.

[428] An allusion to Alcibiades, who is said to have obtained a subsidy
for the Spartan fleet from Cyrus, satrap of Asia Minor.

[429] An allusion to the dithyrambic poet, Cinesias, who was accused of
having sullied, by stooling against it, the pedestal of a statue of
Hecate at one of the street corners of Athens.

[430] Athene.

[431] The route of the procession of the Initiate was from the Ceramicus
(a district of Athens) to Eleusis, a distance of twenty-five stadia.

[432] A shaft shot at the _choragi_ by the poet, because they had failed
to have new dresses made for the actors on this occasion.

[433] It was at the age of seven that children were entered on the
registers of their father's tribe. Aristophanes is accusing Archidemus,
who at that time was the head of the popular party, of being no citizen,
because his name is not entered upon the registers of any tribe.

[434] At funerals women tore their hair, rent their garments, and beat
their bosoms. Aristophanes parodies these demonstrations of grief and
attributes them to the effeminate Clisthenes. Sebinus the Anaphlystian is
a coined name containing an obscene allusion, implying he was in the
habit of allowing connexion with himself a posteriori, and being
masturbated by the other in turn.

[435] Callias, the son of Hipponicus, which the poet turns into
Hippobinus, i. e. one who treads a mare, was an Athenian general, who had
distinguished himself at the battle of Arginusae; he was notorious for
his debauched habits, which he doubtless practised even on board his
galleys. He is called a new Heracles, because of the legend that Heracles
triumphed over fifty virgins in a single night; no doubt the poet alludes
to some exploit of the kind here.

[436] A proverb applied to silly boasters. The Corinthians had sent an
envoy to Megara, who, in order to enhance the importance of his city,
incessantly repeated the phrase, "_The Corinth of Zeus_. "

[437] Demeter.

[438] Tartessus was an Iberian town, near the Avernian marshes, which
were said to be tenanted by reptiles, the progeny of vipers and muraenae,
a kind of fish.

[439] Tithrasios was a part of Libya, fabled to be peopled by Gorgons.

[440] "Invoke the god" was the usual formula which immediately followed
the offering of the libation in the festival of Dionysus. Here he uses
the words after a libation of a new kind and induced by fear.

[441] That is, Heracles, whose temple was at Melite, a suburban deme of
Athens.

[442] Whose statues were placed to make the boundaries of land.

[443] One of the Thirty Tyrants, noted for his versatility.

[444] Celon and Hyperbolus were both dead, and are therefore supposed to
have become the leaders and patrons of the populace in Hades, the same as
they had been on earth.

[445] Already mentioned; one of the chiefs of the popular party in 406
B. C.

[446] Heracles had carried of Cerberus.

[447] Names of Thracian slaves.

[448] As was done to unruly children; he allows every kind of torture
with the exception of the mildest.

[449] A deme of Attica, where there was a temple to Heracles. No doubt
those present uttered the cry "Oh! oh! " in honour of the god.

[450] He pretends it was not a cry of pain at all, but of astonishment
and admiration.

[451] Pretending that it was the thorn causing him pain, and not the lash
of the whip.

[452] According to the Scholiast this is a quotation from the 'Laocoon,'
a lost play of Sophocles.

[453] A general known for his cowardice; he was accused of not being a
citizen, but of Thracian origin; in 406 B. C. he was in disfavour, and he
perished shortly after in a popular tumult.

[454] According to Athenian law, the accused was acquitted when the
voting was equal.

[455] He had helped to establish the oligarchical government of the Four
Hundred, who had just been overthrown.

[456] The fight of Arginusae; the slaves who had fought there had been
accorded their freedom. --The Plataeans had had the title of citizens
since the battle of Marathon.

[457] Things were not going well for Athens at the time; it was only two
years later, 404 B. C. , that Lysander took the city.

[458] A demagogue; because he deceived the people, Aristophanes compares
him with the washermen who cheated their clients by using some mixture
that was cheaper than potash.

[459] Callistrates says that Clidemides was one of Sophocles' sons;
Apollonius states him to have been an actor.

[460] Dionysus was, of course, the patron god of the drama and dramatic
contests.

[461] The majestic grandeur of Aeschylus' periods, coupled with a touch
of parody, is to be recognized in this piece.

[462] It is said that Euripides was the son of a fruit-seller.

[463] Euripides is constantly twitted by Aristophanes with his
predilection for ragged beggars and vagabonds as characters in his plays.

[464] Bellerophon, Philoctetes, and Telephus, were all characters in
different Tragedies of Euripides.

[465] Sailors, when in danger, sacrificed a black lamb to Typhon, the god
of storms.

[466] An allusion to a long monologue of Icarus in the tragedy called
'The Cretans. '

[467] In 'Aeolus,' Macareus violates his own sister; in 'The Clouds,'
this incest, which Euripides introduced upon the stage, is also
mentioned.

[468] The title of one of Euripides' pieces.

[469] The titles of three lost Tragedies of Euripides.

[470] A verse from one of the lost Tragedies of Euripides; the poet was
born at Eleusis.

[471] Aristophanes often makes this accusation of religious heterodoxy
against Euripides.

[472] A dramatic poet, who lived about the end of the sixth century B. C. ,
and a disciple of Thespis; the scenic art was then comparatively in its
infancy.

[473] The Scholiast tells us that Achilles remained mute in the tragedy
entitled 'The Phrygians' or 'The Ransom of Hector,' and that his face was
veiled; he only spoke a few words at the beginning of the drama during a
dialogue with Hermes. --We have no information about the Niobe mentioned
here.

[474] The Scholiast tells us that this expression ([Greek:
hippalektru_on]) was used in 'The Myrmidons' of Aeschylus; Aristophanes
ridicules it again both in the 'Peace' and in 'The Birds. '

[475] An individual apparently noted for his uncouth ugliness.

[476] The beet and the decoctions are intended to indicate the insipidity
of Euripides' style.

[477] An intimate friend of Euripides, who is said to have worked with
him on his Tragedies, to have been 'ghost' to him in fact.

[478] An allusion to Euripides' obscure birth; his mother had been, so it
was said, a vegetable-seller in the public market.

[479] Euripides had introduced every variety of character into his
pieces, whereas Aeschylus only staged divinities or heroes.

[480] There are two Cycni, one, the son of Ares, was killed by Heracles
according to the testimony of Hesiod in his description of the "Shield of
Heracles"; the other, the son of Posidon, who, according to Pindar,
perished under the blows of Achilles. It is not known in which Tragedy of
Aeschylus this character was introduced.
[481] Memnon, the son of Aurora, was killed by Achilles; in the list of
the Tragedies of Aeschylus there is one entitled 'Memnon. '

[482] These two were not poets, but Euripides supposes them disciples of
Aeschylus, because of their rude and antiquated manners.

[483] Clitophon and Theramenes were elegants of effeminate habits and
adept talkers.

[484] A proverb which was applied to versatile people; the two Greek
names [Greek: Chios] and [Greek: Keios] might easily be mistaken for one
another. Both, of course, are islands of the Cyclades.

[485] A verse from the 'Myrmidons' of Aeschylus; here Achilles is
Aeschylus himself.

[486] The 'Persae' of Aeschylus (produced 472 B. C. ) was received with
transports of enthusiasm, reviving as it did memories of the glorious
defeat of Xerxes at Salamis, where the poet had fought, only a few years
before, 480 B. C.

[487] Nothing is known of this Pantacles, whom Eupolis, in his 'Golden
Age,' also describes as awkward ([Greek: skaios]).

[488] Aristophanes had by this time modified his opinion of this general,
whom he had so flouted in 'The Acharnians. '

[489] Son of Telamon, the King of Salamis and brother of Ajax.

[490] The wife of Proetus, King of Argos. Bellerophon, who had sought
refuge at the court of this king after the accidental murder of his
brother Bellerus, had disdained her amorous overtures. Therefore she
denounced him to her husband as having wanted to attempt her virtue and
urged him to cause his death. She killed herself immediately after the
departure of the young hero.

[491] Cephisophon, Euripides' friend, is said to have seduced his wife.

[492] Meaning, they have imitated Sthenoboea in everything; like her,
they have conceived adulterous passions and, again like her, they have
poisoned themselves.

[493] Lycabettus, a mountain of Attica, just outside the walls of Athens,
the "Arthur's Seat" of the city. Parnassus, the famous mountain of
Phocis, the seat of the temple and oracle of Delphi and the home of the
Muses. The whole passage is, of course, in parody of the grandiloquent
style of Aeschylus.

[494] An allusion to Oeneus, King of Aetolia, and to Telephus, King of
Mysia; characters put upon the stage by Euripides.

[495] It was only the rich Athenians who could afford fresh fish, because
of their high price; we know how highly the gourmands prized the eels
from the Copaic lake.

[496] If Aristophanes is to be believed, the orators were of depraved
habits, and exacted infamous complaisances as payment for their lessons
in rhetoric.

[497] Aristophanes attributes the general dissoluteness to the influence
of Euripides; he suggests that the subtlety of his poetry, by sharpening
the wits of the vulgar and even of the coarsest, has instigated them to
insubordination.

[498] Auge, who was seduced by Heracles, was delivered in the temple of
Athene (Scholiast); it is unknown in what piece this fact is
mentioned. --Macareus violates his sister Canace in the 'Aeolus. '

[499] i. e. they busy themselves with philosophic subtleties. This line is
taken from 'The Phryxus,' of which some fragments have come down to us.

[500] In the torch-race the victor was the runner who attained the goal
first without having allowed his torch to go out. This race was a very
ancient institution. Aristophanes means to say that the old habits had
fallen into disuse.

[501] A tetralogy composed of three tragedies, the 'Agamemnon,' the
'Choephorae,' the 'Eumenides,' together with a satirical drama, the
'Proteus. '

[502] This is the opening of the 'Choephorae. ' Aeschylus puts the words
in the mouth of Orestes, who is returning to his native land and visiting
his father's tomb.

[503] i. e. your jokes are very coarse.

[504] He was one of the Athenian generals in command at Arginusae; he and
his colleagues were condemned to death for not having given burial to the
men who fell in that naval fight.

[505] As Euripides had done to those of Aeschylus; that sort of criticism
was too low for him.

[506] [Greek: D_ekuthion ap_olesa], _oleum perdidi,_ I have lost my
labour, was a proverbial expression, which was also possibly the refrain
of some song. Aeschylus means to say that all Euripides' phrases are cast
in the same mould, and that his style is so poor and insipid that one can
adapt to it any foolery one wishes; as for the phrase he adds to every
one of the phrases his rival recites, he chooses it to insinuate that the
work of Euripides is _labour lost_, and that he would have done just as
well not to meddle with tragedy. The joke is mediocre at its best and is
kept up far too long.

[507] Prologue of the 'Archelaus' of Euripides, a tragedy now lost.

[508] From prologue of the 'Hypsipile' of Euripides, a play now lost.

[509] From prologue of the 'Sthenoboea' of Euripides, a play now lost.

[510] From prologue of the 'Phryxus' of Euripides, a play now lost.

[511] From prologue of the 'Iphigeneia in Tauris' of Euripides.

[512] Prologue of 'The Meleager' by Euripides, lost.

[513] Prologue of 'The Menalippe Sapiens,' by Euripides, lost.

[514] The whole of these fragments are quoted at random and have no
meaning. Euripides, no doubt, wants to show that the choruses of
Aeschylus are void of interest or coherence. As to the refrain, "haste to
sustain the assault," Euripides possibly wants to insinuate that
Aeschylus incessantly repeats himself and that a wearying monotony
pervades his choruses. However, all these criticisms are in the main
devoid of foundation.

[515] This ridiculous couplet pretends to imitate the redundancy and
nonsensicality of Aeschylus' language; it can be seen how superficial and
unfair the criticism of Euripides is; probably this is just what
Aristophanes wanted to convey by this long and wearisome scene.

[516] The Scholiast conjectures this Melitus to be the same individual
who later accused Socrates.

[517] The most infamous practices were attributed to the Lesbian women,
amongst others, that of _fellation_, that is the vile trick of taking a
man's penis in the mouth, to give him gratification by sucking and
licking it with the tongue. Dionysus means to say that Euripides takes
pleasure in describing shameful passions.

[518] Here the criticism only concerns the rhythm and not either the
meaning or the style. This passage was sung to one of the airs that
Euripides had adopted for his choruses and which have not come down to
us; we are therefore absolutely without any data that would enable us to
understand and judge a criticism of this kind.

[519] A celebrated courtesan, who was skilled in twelve different
postures of Venus. Aeschylus returns to his idea, which he has so often
indicated, that Euripides' poetry is low and impure; he at the same time
scoffs at the artifices to which Euripides had recourse when inspiration
and animation failed him.

[520] No monologue of Euripides that has been preserved bears the
faintest resemblance to this specimen which. Aeschylus pretends to be
giving here.

[521] Beginning of Euripides' 'Medea. '

[522] Fragment from Aeschylus 'Philoctetes. ' The Sperchius is a river in
Thessaly, which has its source in the Pindus range and its mouth in the
Maliac gulf.

[523] A verse from Euripides' 'Antigone. ' Its meaning is, that it is
better to speak well than to speak the truth, if you want to persuade.

[524] From the 'Niobe,' a lost play, of Aeschylus.

[525] From the 'Telephus' of Euripides, in which he introduces Achilles
playing at dice. This line was also ridiculed by Eupolis.

[526] From Euripides' 'Meleager. ' All these plays, with the one exception
of the 'Medea,' are lost.

[527] From the 'Glaucus Potniensis,' a lost play of Aeschylus.

[528] i. e. one hundred porters, either because many of the Athenian
porters were Egyptians, or as an allusion to the Pyramids and other great
works, which had habituated them to carrying heavy burdens.

[529] Euripides' friend and collaborator.

[530] The invention of weights and measures, of dice, and of the game of
chess are attributed to him, also that of four additional letters of the
alphabet.

[531] i. e. that cannot decide for either party.

[532] i. e. that a country can always be invaded and that the fleet alone
is a safe refuge. This is the same advice as that given by Pericles, and
which Thucydides expresses thus, "Let your country be devastated, or even
devastate it yourself, and set sail for Laconia with your fleet. "

[533] An allusion to the fees of the dicasts, or jurymen; we have already
seen that at this period it was two obols, and later three.

[534] A half-line from Euripides' 'Hippolytus. ' The full line is: [Greek:
h_e gl_ott' om_omok', h_e de phr_en an_omotos,] "my tongue has taken an
oath, but my mind is unsworn," a bit of casuistry which the critics were
never tired of bringing up against the author.

[535] A verse from the 'Aeolus' of Euripides, but slightly altered.
Euripides said, "Why is is shameful, if the spectators, who enjoy it, do
not think so? "

[536] A verse from the 'Phrixus' of Euripides; what follows is a parody.

[537] We have already seen Aeschylus pretending that it was possible to
adapt any foolish expression one liked to the verses of Euripides: "a
little bottle, a little bag, a little fleece. "

[538] Pluto speaks as though he were an Athenian himself.

[539] That they should hang themselves. Cleophon is said to have been an
influential alien resident who was opposed to concluding peace; Myrmex
and Nicomachus were two officials guilty of peculation of public funds;
Archenomus is unknown.

[540] He would brand them as fugitive slaves, if, despite his orders,
they refused to come down.

[541] An Athenian admiral.

[542] The real name of the father of Adimantus was Leucolophides, which
Aristophanes jestingly turns into Leucolophus, i. e. _White Crest_.

[543] i. e. in a foreign country; Cleophon, as we have just seen, was not
an Athenian.




THE THESMOPHORIAZUSAE

or

The Women's Festival




INTRODUCTION

Like the 'Lysistrata,' the 'Thesmophoriazusae, or Women's Festival,' and
the next following play, the 'Ecclesiazusae, or Women in Council' are
comedies in which the fair sex play a great part, and also resemble that
extremely _scabreux_ production in the plentiful crop of doubtful 'double
entendres' and highly suggestive situations they contain.

The play has more of a proper intrigue and formal denouement than is
general with our Author's pieces, which, like modern extravaganzas and
musical comedies, are often strung on a very slender thread of plot. The
idea of the 'Thesmophoriazusae' is as follows.

Euripides is summoned as a notorious woman-hater and detractor of the
female sex to appear for trial and judgment before the women of Athens
assembled to celebrate the Thesmophoria, a festival held in honour of the
goddesses Demeter and Persephone, from which men were rigidly excluded.
The poet is terror-stricken, and endeavours to persuade his confr? re, the
tragedian Agathon, to attend the meeting in the guise of a woman to plead
his cause, Agathon's notorious effeminacy of costume and way of life
lending itself to the deception; but the latter refuses point-blank. He
then prevails on his father-in-law, Mnesilochus, to do him this favour,
and shaves, depilates, and dresses him up accordingly. But so far from
throwing oil on the troubled waters, Mnesilochus indulges in a long
harangue full of violent abuse of the whole sex, and relates some
scandalous stories of the naughty ways of peccant wives. The assembly
suspects at once there is a man amongst them, and on examination of the
old fellow's person, this is proved to be the case. He flies for
sanctuary to the altar, snatching a child from the arms of one of the
women as a hostage, vowing to kill it if they molest him further. On
investigation, however, the infant turns out to be a wine-skin dressed in
baby's clothes.

In despair Mnesilochus sends urgent messages to Euripides to come and
rescue him from his perilous predicament. The latter then appears, and in
successive characters selected from his different Tragedies--now Menelaus
meeting Helen again in Egypt, now Echo sympathising with the chained
Andromeda, presently Perseus about to release the heroine from her
rock--pleads for his unhappy father-in-law. At length he succeeds in
getting him away in the temporary absence of the guard, a Scythian
archer, whom he entices from his post by the charms of a dancing-girl.

As may be supposed, the appearance of Mnesilochus among the women dressed
in women's clothes, the examination of his person to discover his true
sex and his final detection, afford fine opportunities for a display of
the broadest Aristophanic humour. The latter part of the play also, where
various pieces of Euripides are burlesqued, is extremely funny; and must
have been still more so when represented before an audience familiar with
every piece and almost every line parodied, and played by actors trained
and got up to imitate every trick and mannerism of appearance and
delivery of the tragic actors who originally took the parts.

The 'Thesmophoriazusae' was produced in the year 412 B. C. , six years
before the death of Euripides, who is held up to ridicule in it, as he is
in 'The Wasps' and several other of our Author's comedies.

* * * * *

THE THESMOPHORIAZUSAE

or

The Women's Festival


DRAMATIS PERSONAE

EURIPIDES.
MNESILOCHUS, Father-in-law of Euripides.
AGATHON.
SERVANT OF AGATHON.
CHORUS attending AGATHON.
HERALD.
WOMEN.
CLISTHENES.
A PRYTANIS or Member of the Council.
A SCYTHIAN or Police Officer.
CHORUS OF THESMOPHORIAZUSAE--women keeping the Feast of Demeter.

SCENE: In front of Agathon's house; afterwards in the precincts of the
Temple of Demeter.

* * * * *

THE THESMOPHORIAZUSAE

or

The Women's Festival


MNESILOCHUS. Great Zeus! will the swallow never appear to end the winter
of my discontent? Why the fellow has kept me on the run ever since early
this morning; he wants to kill me, that's certain. Before I lose my
spleen entirely, Euripides, can you at least tell me whither you are
leading me?

EURIPIDES. What need for you to hear what you are going to see?

MNESILOCHUS. How is that? Repeat it. No need for me to hear. . . .

EURIPIDES. What you are going to see.

MNESILOCHUS. Nor consequently to see. . . .

EURIPIDES. What you have to hear. [544]

MNESILOCHUS. What is this wiseacre stuff you are telling me? I must
neither see nor hear.

EURIPIDES. Ah! but you have two things there that are essentially
distinct.

MNESILOCHUS. Seeing and hearing.

EURIPIDES. Undoubtedly.

MNESILOCHUS. In what way distinct?

EURIPIDES. In this way. Formerly, when Ether separated the elements and
bore the animals that were moving in her bosom, she wished to endow them
with sight, and so made the eye round like the sun's disc and bored ears
in the form of a funnel.

MNESILOCHUS. And because of this funnel I neither see nor hear. Ah! great
gods! I am delighted to know it. What a fine thing it is to talk with
wise men!

EURIPIDES. I will teach you many another thing of the sort.

MNESILOCHUS. That's well to know; but first of all I should like to find
out how to grow lame, so that I need not have to follow you all about.

EURIPIDES. Come, hear and give heed!

MNESILOCHUS. I'm here and waiting.

EURIPIDES. Do you see that little door?

MNESILOCHUS. Yes, certainly.

EURIPIDES. Silence!

MNESILOCHUS. Silence about what? About the door?

EURIPIDES.