No More Learning

« Huzzay!
It was such a hungry sermon. ”
"And it is the 29th of December, and our Harry has come
home. "
་་
Huzzay, old Pincot! " again says my lord; and my dear lady's
lips looked as if they were trembling with prayer. She would
have Harry lead in Beatrix to the supper-room, going herself
with my young Lord Viscount; and to this party came Tom
Tusher directly, whom four at least out of the company of five
wished away. Away he went, however, as soon as the sweet-
meats were put down; and then, by the great crackling fire,-
his mistress, or Beatrix with her blushing glances, filling his glass
for him,- Harry told the story of his campaign, and passed the
most delightful night his life had ever known. The sun was up
long ere he was, so deep, sweet, and refreshing was his slumber.
He woke as if angels had been watching at his bed all night.
I daresay one that was as pure and loving as an angel had
blessed his sleep with her prayers.


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
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Next morning the chaplain read prayers to the little household
at Walcote, as the custom was: Esmond thought Mistress Beatrix
did not listen to Tusher's exhortation much; her eyes were wan-
dering everywhere during the service,- at least whenever he
looked up he met them. Perhaps he also was not very attentive
to his reverence the chaplain. "This might have been my life,"
he was thinking; "this might have been my duty from now till
old age. Well, were it not a pleasant one to be with these dear
friends and part from 'em no more? Until- until the destined
lover comes and takes away pretty Beatrix » and the best part
of Tom Tusher's exposition, which may have been very learned
and eloquent, was quite lost to poor Harry by this vision of the
destined lover, who put the preacher out.
All the while of the prayers, Beatrix knelt a little way before
Harry Esmond. The red stockings were changed for a pair
of gray, and black shoes in which her feet looked to the full as
pretty. All the roses of spring could not vie with the brightness
of her complexion; Esmond thought he had never seen anything
like the sunny lustre of her eyes. My lady viscountess looked
fatigued as if with watching, and her face was pale.
Miss Beatrix remarked these signs of indisposition in her
mother, and deplored them.
"I am an old woman," says my
lady with a kind smile: "I cannot hope to look as young as
you do, my dear. "
"She'll never look as good as you do if she lives till she's a
hundred," says my lord, taking his mother by the waist and kiss-
ing her hand.
"Do I look very wicked, cousin? " says Beatrix, turning full
round on Esmond, with her pretty face so close under his chin
that the soft perfumed hair touched it. She laid her finger-tips
on his sleeve as she spoke, and he put his other hand over hers.
"I'm like your looking-glass," says he, "and that can't flatter
you. "
"He means that you are always looking at him, my dear,"
says her mother archly. Beatrix ran away from Esmond at
this, and flew to her mamma, whom she kissed, stopping my lady's
mouth with her pretty hand.
"And Harry is very good to look at," says my lady, with her
fond eyes regarding the young man.
"If 'tis good to see a happy face," says he, "you see that. "
My lady said "Amen" with a sigh; and Harry thought the


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
memory of her dear lord rose up and rebuked her back again
into sadness, for her face lost the smile and resumed its look of
melancholy.
"Why, Harry, how fine we look in our scarlet-and-silver and
our black periwig," cries my lord. "Mother, I am tired of my
own hair. When shall I have a peruke? Where did you get
your steenkirk, Harry? "
"It's some of my lady dowager's lace," says Harry; "she
gave me this and a number of other fine things. "
"My lady dowager isn't such a bad woman," my lord con-
tinued.
"She's not so-so red as she's painted," says Miss Beatrix.
Her brother broke into a laugh. "I'll tell her you said so;
by the Lord, 'Trix, I will," he cries out.
"She'll know that you hadn't the wit to say it, my lord," says
Miss Beatrix.
"We won't quarrel the first day Harry's here, will we,
mother? " said the young lord. "We'll see if we can get on to
the new year without a fight. Have some of this Christmas pie.
And here comes the tankard; no, it's Pincot with the tea. ”
«< Will the captain choose a dish? " asked Mistress Beatrix.
"I say, Harry," my lord goes on, "I'll show thee my horses
after breakfast, and we'll go a-bird-netting to-night; and on
Monday there's a cock-match at Winchester-do you love cock-
fighting, Harry? -between the gentlemen of Sussex and the gen-
tlemen of Hampshire; at £10 the battle and £50 the odd battle,
to show one-and-twenty cocks. "
"And what will you do, Beatrix, to amuse our kinsman ? "
asks my lady.
"I'll listen to him," says Beatrix. "I am sure he has a hun-
dred things to tell us. And I'm jealous already of the Spanish
ladies. Was that a beautiful nun at Cadiz that you rescued from
the soldiers? Your man talked of it last night in the kitchen,
and Mrs. Betty told me this morning as she combed my hair.
And he says you must be in love, for you sat on deck all night
and scribbled verses all day in your table-book. " Harry thought
if he had wanted a subject for verses yesterday, to-day he had
found one; and not all the Lindamiras and Ardelias of the poets
were half so beautiful as this young creature: but he did not say
so, though some one did for him.


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14677
THE DUKE OF MARLBOROUGH
From The History of Henry Esmond'
ND now, having seen a great march through
A friendly country, the pomps and festivities of more than
one German court, the severe struggle of a hotly contested
battle, and the triumph of victory, Mr. Esmond beheld another
part of military duty: our troops entering the enemy's territory
and putting all around them to fire and sword; burning farms,
wasted fields, shrieking women, slaughtered sons and fathers, and
drunken soldiery, cursing and carousing in the midst of tears,
terror, and murder. Why does the stately Muse of History, that
delights in describing the valor of heroes and the grandeur of
conquest, leave out these scenes, so brutal, mean, and degrading,
that yet form by far the greater part of the drama of war? You
gentlemen of England, who live at home at ease and compliment
yourselves in the songs of triumph with which our chieftains are
bepraised; you pretty maidens that come tumbling down the
stairs when the fife and drum call you, and huzza for the British
Grenadiers,- do you take account that these items go to make
up the amount of triumph you admire, and form part of the
duties of the heroes you fondle ? Our chief, whom England
and all Europe, saving only the Frenchmen, worshiped almost,
had this of the god-like in him: that he was impassible before
victory, before danger, before defeat. Before the greatest obsta-
cle or the most trivial ceremony; before a hundred thousand men
drawn in battalia, or a peasant slaughtered at the door of his
burning hovel, before a carouse of drunken German lords, or
a monarch's court, or a cottage table where his plans were laid,
or an enemy's battery, vomiting flame and death and strewing
corpses round about him,- he was always cold, calm, resolute,
like fate. He performed a treason or a court bow, he told a
falsehood as black as Styx, as easily as he paid a compliment or
spoke about the weather. He took a mistress and left her, he
betrayed his benefactor and supported him, or would have mur-
dered him, with the same calmness always, and having no more
remorse than Clotho when she weaves the thread, or Lachesis
when she cuts it. In the hour of battle I have heard the Prince
of Savoy's officers say the prince became possessed with a sort
of warlike fury: his eyes lighted up; he rushed hither and thither,


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
raging; he shrieked curses and encouragement, yelling and hark-
ing his bloody war-dogs on, and himself always at the first of
the hunt. Our duke was as calm at the mouth of a cannon as
at the door of a drawing-room. Perhaps he could not have been
the great man he was had he had a heart either for love or
hatred, or pity or fear, or regret or remorse. He achieved the
highest deed of daring, or deepest calculation of thought, as he
performed the very meanest action of which a man is capable;
told a lie or cheated a fond woman or robbed a poor beggar of
a halfpenny, with a like awful serenity, and equal capacity of
the highest and lowest acts of our nature.
His qualities were pretty well known in the army, where
there were parties of all politics, and of plenty of shrewdness
and wit; but there existed such a perfect confidence in him, as
the first captain of the world, and such a faith and admiration
in his prodigious genius and fortune, that the very men whom he
notoriously cheated of their pay, the chiefs whom he used and
injured for he used all men, great and small, that came near
him, as his instruments alike, and took something of theirs, either
some quality or some property: the blood of a soldier, it might
be, or a jeweled hat or a hundred thousand crowns from a king,
or a portion out of a starving sentinel's three farthings; or when
he was young, a kiss from a woman, and the gold chain off her
neck, taking all he could from woman or man, and having, as I
said, this of the godlike in him, that he could see a hero perish
or a sparrow fall with the same amount of sympathy for either.
Not that he had no tears. he could always order up this reserve
at the proper moment to battle; he could draw upon tears or
smiles alike, and whenever need was for using this cheap coin.
He would cringe to a shoeblack, and he would flatter a minister
or a monarch; be haughty, be humble, threaten, repent, weep,
grasp your hand, or stab you whenever he saw occasion — but
yet those of the army who knew him best and had suffered most
from him, admired him most of all; and as he rode along the
lines to battle, or galloped up in the nick of time to a battalion
reeling from before the enemy's charge or shot, the fainting men
and officers got new courage as they saw the splendid calm of
his face, and felt that his will made them irresistible.
-
After the great victory of Blenheim, the enthusiasm of the
army for the duke, even of his bitterest personal enemies in it,
amounted to a sort of rage: nay, the very officers who cursed


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14679
him in their hearts were among the most frantic to cheer him.
Who could refuse his meed of admiration to such a victory and
such a victor? Not he who writes: a man may profess to be
ever so much a philosopher, but he who fought on that day
must feel a thrill of pride as he recalls it.
THE FAMOUS MR. JOSEPH ADDISON
From The History of Henry Esmond'
THE
HE gentlemen ushers had a table at Kensington, and the Guard
a very splendid dinner daily at St. James's, at either of which
ordinaries Esmond was free to dine. Dick Steele liked the
Guard table better than his own at the gentlemen ushers', where
there was less wine and more ceremony; and Esmond had many
a jolly afternoon in company of his friend, and a hundred times.
at least saw Dick into his chair. If there is verity in wine,
according to the old adage, what an amiable-natured character
Dick's must have been! In proportion as he took in wine he
overflowed with kindness. His talk was not witty so much as
charming. He never said a word that could anger anybody, and
only became the more benevolent the more tipsy he grew. Many
of the wags derided the poor fellow in his cups, and chose him
as a butt for their satire; but there was a kindness about him,
and a sweet playful fancy, that seemed to Esmond far more
charming than the pointed talk of the brightest wits, with their
elaborate repartees and affected severities. I think Steele shone
rather than sparkled. Those famous beaux esprits of the coffee-
houses (Mr. William Congreve, for instance, when his gout and
his grandeur permitted him to come among us) would make
many brilliant hits,-half a dozen in a night sometimes,— but
like sharpshooters, when they had fired their shot they were
obliged to retire under cover till their pieces were loaded again,
and wait till they got another chance at their enemy; whereas
Dick never thought that his bottle companion was a butt to aim
at-only a friend to shake by the hand. The poor fellow had
half the town in his confidence: everybody knew everything about
his loves and his debts, his creditors' or his mistress's obdu-
racy. When Esmond first came on to the town, honest Dick
was all flames and raptures for a young lady, a West India for-
tune, whom he married. In a couple of years the lady was dead,


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
the fortune was all but spent, and the honest widower was as
eager in pursuit of a new paragon of beauty as if he had never
courted and married and buried the last one.
Quitting the Guard table one Sunday afternoon, when by
chance Dick had a sober fit upon him, he and his friend were
making their way down Germain Street, and Dick all of a sud-
den left his companion's arm and ran after a gentleman who was
poring over a folio volume at the book-shop near to St. James's
Church. He was a fair, tall man, in a snuff-colored suit, with a
plain sword, very sober, and almost shabby in appearance - at
least when compared to Captain Steele, who loved to adorn his
jolly round person with the finest of clothes, and shone in scarlet
and gold lace. The captain rushed up then to the student of the
book-stall, took him in his arms, hugged him, and would have
kissed him,- for Dick was always hugging and bussing his friends,
-but the other stepped back with a flush on his pale face, seem-
ing to decline this public manifestation of Steele's regard.
"My dearest Joe, where hast thou hidden thyself this age? "
cries the captain, still holding both his friend's hands: "I have
been languishing for thee this fortnight. "
"A fortnight is not an age, Dick," says the other very good-
humoredly. (He had light-blue eyes, extraordinary bright, and a
face perfectly regular and handsome, like a tinted statue. ) "And
I have been hiding myself - where do you think? "
"What! not across the water, my dear Joe? " says Steele,
with a look of great alarm: "thou knowest I have always—»
"No," says his friend, interrupting him with a smile: " we
are not come to such straits as that, Dick. I have been hiding,
sir, at a place where people never think of finding you — at
my own lodgings, whither I am going to smoke a pipe now, and
drink a glass of sack. Will your Honor come? "
"Harry Esmond, come hither," cries out Dick. "Thou hast
heard me talk over and over again of my dearest Joe, my guard-
ian angel? "
"Indeed," says Mr. Esmond with a bow, "it is not from you
only that I have learnt to admire Mr. Addison. We loved good
poetry at Cambridge as well as at Oxford; and I have some of
yours by heart, though I have put on a red coat.
10
qui canoro blandius Orpheo vocale ducis carmen;'-shall I go
on, sir? " says Mr. Esmond, who indeed had read and loved the
charming Latin poems of Mr. Addison, as every scholar of that
time knew and admired them.


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14681
"This is Captain Esmond, who was at Blenheim," says Steele.
"Lieutenant Esmond," says the other with a low bow, "at
Mr. Addison's service. "
"I have heard of you," says Mr. Addison with a smile; as
indeed everybody about town had heard that unlucky story about
Esmond's dowager aunt and the duchess.
"We were going to the George to take a bottle before the
play," says Steele: "wilt thou be one, Joe? "
Mr. Addison said his own lodgings were hard by, where he
was still rich enough to give a good bottle of wine to his friends;
and invited the two gentlemen to his apartment in the Hay-
market, whither we accordingly went.
"I shall get credit with my landlady," says he with a smile,
"when she sees two such fine gentlemen as you come up my
stair. " And he politely made his visitors welcome to his apart-
ment, which was indeed but a shabby one, though no grandee
of the land could receive his guests with a more perfect and
courtly grace than this gentleman. A frugal dinner, consisting
of a slice of meat and a penny loaf, was awaiting the owner
of the lodgings. "My wine is better than my meat," says Mr.
Addison. "My Lord Halifax sent me the burgundy. " And he
set a bottle and glasses before his friends, and ate his simple.
dinner in a very few minutes; after which the three fell to, and
began to drink.
"You see," says Mr. Addison, pointing to his writing-table,
whereon was a map of the action at Hochstedt, and several
other gazettes and pamphlets relating to the battle, "that I too
am busy about your affairs, captain. I am engaged as a poeti-
cal gazetteer, to say truth, and am writing a poem on the cam-
paign. ”
So Esmond, at the request of his host, told him what he knew
about the famous battle, drew the river on the table aliquo
mero, and with the aid of some bits of tobacco pipe showed the
advance of the left wing, where he had been engaged.
A sheet or two of the verses lay already on the table beside
our bottles and glasses; and Dick, having plentifully refreshed
himself from the latter, took up the pages of manuscript, writ
out with scarce a blot or correction, in the author's slim, neat
handwriting, and began to read therefrom with great emphasis
and volubility. At pauses of the verse, the enthusiastic reader
stopped and fired off a great salvo of applause.
-


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
Esmond smiled at the enthusiasm of Addison's friend. «You
are like the German burghers," says he, "and the princes on the
Mozelle: when our army came to a halt, they always sent a dep-
utation to compliment the chief, and fired a salute with all their
artillery from their walls. "
"And drunk the great chief's health afterward, did not they? "
says Captain Steele, gayly filling up a bumper: he never was
tardy at that sort of acknowledgment of a friend's merit.
"And the duke, since you will have me act his Grace's
part," says Mr. Addison, with a smile and something of a blush,
"pledged his friends in return. Most Serene Elector of Covent
Garden, I drink to your Highness's health," and he filled him-
self a glass. Joseph required scarce more pressing than Dick to
that sort of amusement: but the wine never seemed at all to
fluster Mr. Addison's brains, it only unloosed his tongue: whereas
Captain Steele's head and speech were quite overcome by a single
bottle.
No matter what the verses were (and to say truth, Mr. Esmond
found some of them more than indifferent), Dick's enthusiasm
for his chief never faltered; and in every line from Addison's
pen, Steele found a master-stroke. By the time Dick had come to
that part of the poem wherein the bard describes, as blandly as
though he were recording a dance at the opera, or a harmless
bout of bucolic cudgeling at a village fair, that bloody and ruth-
less part of our campaign with the remembrance whereof every
soldier who bore a part in it must sicken with shame,- when we
were ordered to ravage and lay waste the Elector's country; and
with fire and murder, slaughter and crime, a great part of his
dominions was overrun;- when Dick came to the lines,—
"In vengeance roused, the soldier fills his hand
With sword and fire, and ravages the land;
In crackling flames a thousand harvests burn,
A thousand villages to ashes burn.
To the thick woods the woolly flocks retreat,
And mixed with bellowing herds confusèd bleat;
Their trembling lords the common shade partake,
And cries of infants sound in every brake.
The listening soldier fixed in sorrow stands,
Loath to obey his leader's just commands.
The leader grieves, by generous pity swayed,
To see his just commands so well obeyed,”.


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14683
by this time wine and friendship had brought poor Dick to a
perfectly maudlin state, and he hiccoughed out the last line with
a tenderness that set one of his auditors a-laughing.
. "I admire the license of your poets," says Esmond to Mr.
Addison. (Dick, after reading of the verses, was fain to go off,
insisting on kissing his two dear friends before his departure,
and reeling away with his periwig over his eyes. ) "I admire
your art: the murder of the campaign is done to military music,
like a battle at the opera; and the virgins shriek in harmony
as our victorious grenadiers march into their villages. Do you
know what a scene it was? "-by this time, perhaps, the wine
had warmed Mr. Esmond's head too-"what a triumph you are
celebrating? what scenes of shame and horror were enacted, over
which the commander's genius presided, as calm as though he
didn't belong to our sphere? You talk of the 'listening soldier
fixed in sorrow,' the 'leader's grief swayed by generous pity':
to my belief the leader cared no more for bleating flocks than
he did for infants' cries, and many of our ruffians butchered one
or the other with equal alacrity. I was ashamed of my trade
when I saw those horrors perpetrated, which came under every
man's eyes. You hew out of your polished verses a stately image
of smiling Victory: I tell you 'tis an uncouth, distorted, savage
idol; hideous, bloody, and barbarous. The rites performed before
it are shocking to think of. You great poets should show it as
it is, ugly and horrible, not beautiful and serene. Oh, sir, had
you made the campaign, believe me, you never would have sung
it so. "
—
During this little outbreak Mr. Addison was listening, smoking
out of his long pipe, and smiling very placidly. "What would
you have? " says he. "In our polished days, and according to the
rules of art, 'tis impossible that the Muse should depict tortures
or begrime her hands with the horrors of war. These are indi-
cated rather than described; as in the Greek tragedies, that I
daresay you have read (and sure there can be no more elegant
specimens of composition), Agamemnon is slain, or Medea's child-
ren destroyed, away from the scene,-the chorus occupying the
stage and singing of the action to pathetic music. Something of
this I attempt, my dear sir, in my humble way: 'tis a panegyric
I mean to write, and not a satire. Were I to sing as you would
have me, the town would tear the poet in pieces, and burn his
book by the hands of the common hangman. - Do you not use


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
•
tobacco? Of all the weeds grown on earth, sure the nicotian is
the most soothing and salutary. -We must paint our great duke,"
Mr. Addison went on, "not as a man which no doubt he is,
with weaknesses like the rest of us-but as a hero. "Tis in a
triumph, not a battle, that your humble servant is riding his sleek
Pegasus. We college poets trot, you know, on very easy nags;
it hath been, time out of mind, part of the poet's profession to
celebrate the actions of heroes in verse, and to sing the deeds
which you men of war perform. I must follow the rules of my
art; and the composition of such a strain as this must be harmo-
nious and majestic,-not familiar, or too near the vulgar truth.
Si parva licet: if Virgil could invoke the divine Augustus, a hum-
bler poet from the banks of the Isis may celebrate a victory and
a conqueror of our own nation, in whose triumphs every Briton
has a share, and whose glory and genius contribute to every citi
zen's individual honor. When hath there been, since our Henrys'
and Edwards' days, such a great feat of arms as that from which
you yourself have brought away marks of distinction? If 'tis in
my power to sing that song worthily, I will do so, and be thankful
to my Muse.
If I fail as a poet, as a Briton at least I will show
my loyalty, and fling up my cap and huzza for the conqueror:-
-
"Rheni pacator et Istri
Omnis in hoc uno variis discordia cessit
Ordinibus; lætatur eques, plauditque senator,
Votaque patricio certant plebeia favori. '»
―――
"There were as brave men on that field," says Mr. Esmond
(who never could be made to love the Duke of Marlborough,
nor to forget those stories which he used to hear in his youth
regarding that great chief's selfishness and treachery) - "there
were men at Blenheim as good as the leader, whom neither
knights nor senators applauded, nor voices plebeian nor patrician
favored, and who lie there forgotten under the clods. What poet
is there to sing them? "
"To sing the gallant souls of heroes sent to Hades! " says
Mr. Addison with a smile. "Would you celebrate them all? If
I may venture to question anything in such an admirable work,
the catalogue of the ships in Homer hath always appeared to me
as somewhat wearisome: what had the poem been, supposing the
writer had chronicled the names of captains, lieutenants, rank and
file? One of the greatest of a great man's qualities is success:


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14685
'tis the result of all the others; 'tis a latent power in him which
compels the favor of the gods and subjugates fortune. Of all his
gifts I admire that one in the great Marlborough. To be brave?
every man is brave. But in being victorious, as he is, I fancy
there is something divine. In presence of the occasion, the great
soul of the leader shines out, and the god is confessed. Death
itself respects him, and passes by him to lay others low. War
and carnage flee before him to ravage other parts of the field,
as Hector from before the divine Achilles. You say he hath no
pity: no more have the gods, who are above it, and superhuman.
The fainting battle gathers strength at his aspect; and wherever
he rides, victory charges with him. "
BEATRIX ESMOND AND THE DUKE OF HAMILTON
From The History of Henry Esmond'
« Is
PER
ERHAPS Beatrix was a little offended at his gayety.
this the way, sir, that you receive the announcement of your
misfortune," says she; "and do you come smiling before me
as if you were glad to be rid of me? "
Esmond would not be put off from his good-humor, but told
her the story of Tom Trett and his bankruptcy. "I have been
hankering after the grapes on the wall," says he, "and lost my
temper because they were beyond my reach: was there any
wonder? They're gone now, and another has them, a taller
man than your humble servant has won them. " And the colonel
made his cousin a low bow.
-
"A taller man, Cousin Esmond! " says she. "A man of spirit
would have scaled the wall, sir, and seized them! A man of
courage would have fought for 'em, not gaped for 'em. "
"A duke has but to gape and they drop into his mouth," says
Esmond, with another low bow.
"Yes, sir," says she, "a duke is a taller man than you. And
why should I not be grateful to one such as his Grace, who gives
me his heart and his great name? It is a great gift he honors
me with; I know 'tis a bargain between us, and I accept it and
will do my utmost to perform my part of it. 'Tis no question of
sighing and philandering, between a nobleman of his Grace's age
and a girl who hath little of that softness in her nature. Why


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
should I not own that I am ambitious, Harry Esmond; and if it
be no sin in a man to covet honor, why should a woman too not
desire it? Shall I be frank with you, Harry, and say that if you
had not been down on your knees and so humble, you might
have fared better with me? A woman of my spirit, cousin, is to
be won by gallantry, and not by sighs and rueful faces. All the
time you are worshiping and singing hymns to me, I know very
well I am no goddess, and grow weary of the incense. So would
you have been weary of the goddess too, when she was called
Mrs. Esmond and out of humor because she had not pin
money enough, and was forced to go about in an old gown. Eh!
cousin, a goddess in a mob cap that has to make her husband's
gruel ceases to be divine-I am sure of it. I should have been
sulky and scolded; and of all the proud wretches in the world.
Mr. Esmond is the proudest, let me tell him that. You never
fall into a passion; but you never forgive, I think.
Had you
been a great man you might have been good-humored; but being
nobody, sir, you are too great a man for me: and I'm afraid of
you, cousin there! and I won't worship you, and you'll never
be happy except with a woman who will. Why, after I belonged
to you, and after one of my tantrums, you would have put the
pillow over my head some night and smothered me, as the black
man does the woman in the play that you're so fond of. What's
the creature's name? Desdemona. You would, you little black-
eyed Othello. "
"I think I should,
--
-
Beatrix," says the colonel.
"And I want no such ending. I intend to live to be a
hundred, and to go to ten thousand routs and balls, and to play
cards every night of my life till the year eighteen hundred. And
I like to be the first of my company, sir; and I like flattery and
compliments, and you give me none: and I like to be made to
laugh, sir, and who's to laugh at your dismal face, I should like
to know? and I like a coach-and-six or a coach-and-eight; and
I like diamonds and a new gown every week, and people to say,
'That's the duchess-how well her Grace looks- make way
for Madame l'Ambassadrice d'Angleterre - call her Excellency's
people' that's what I like. And as for you, you want a woman
to bring your slippers and cap, and to sit at your feet and cry
'Oh, caro! oh, bravo! ' while you read your Shakespeares and
Miltons and stuff. Mamma would have been the wife for you
had you been a little older, though you look ten years older than


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14687
she does-you do, you glum-faced, blue-bearded little old man!
You might have sat like Darby and Joan and flattered each
other, and billed and cooed like a pair of old pigeons on a perch.
I want my wings and to use them, sir. " And she spread out
her beautiful arms, as if indeed she could fly off like the pretty
"Gawrie " whom the man in the story was enamored of.
"And what will your Peter Wilkins say to your flight? " says
Esmond, who never admired this fair creature more than when
she rebelled and laughed at him.
"A duchess knows her place," says she with a laugh. "Why,
I have a son already made for me and thirty years old (my Lord
Arran), and four daughters. How they will scold, and what a
rage they will be in, when I come to take the head of the table!
But I give them only a month to be angry: at the end of that
time they shall love me every one, and so shall Lord Arran, and
so shall all his Grace's Scots vassals and followers in the High-
lands. I'm bent on it; and when I take a thing in my head 'tis.
done. His Grace is the greatest gentleman in Europe, and I'll
try and make him happy: and when the King comes back you
may count on my protection, Cousin Esmond-for come back
the King will and shall; and I'll bring him back from Versailles.
if he comes under my hoop. "
"I hope the world will make you happy, Beatrix," says
Esmond with a sigh. "You'll be Beatrix till you are my lady
duchess will you not? I shall then make your Grace my very
lowest bow. "
"None of these sighs and this satire, cousin," she says: “I
take his Grace's great bounty thankfully-yes, thankfully, and
will wear his honors becomingly. I do not say he hath touched
my heart, but he has my gratitude, obedience, admiration; I
have told him that and no more, and with that his noble heart
is content. have told him all - even the story of that poor
creature that I was engaged to, and that I could not love, and I
gladly gave his word back to him, and jumped for joy to get
. back my own. I am twenty-five years old. "
"Twenty-six, my dear," says Esmond.
"Twenty-five, sir I choose to be twenty-five; and in eight
years no man hath ever touched my heart. Yes you did
once for a little, Harry, when you came back after Lille, and
engaging with that murderer Mohun, and saving Frank's life. I
thought I could like you; and mamma begged me hard on her


## p. 14688 (#262) ##########################################

14688
WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
knees, and I did - for a day. But the old chill came over me,
Henry, and the old fear of you and your melancholy; and I was
glad when you went away, and engaged with my Lord Ashburn-
ham that I might hear no more of you- that's the truth. You
are too good for me, somehow. I could not make you happy,
and should break my heart in trying and not being able to love
you. But if you had asked me when we gave you the sword,
you might have had me, sir; and we both should have been mis-
erable by this time. I talked with that silly lord all night just
to vex you and mamma; and I succeeded, didn't I? How frankly
we can talk of these things! It seems a thousand years ago; and
though we are here sitting in the same room, there is a great wall
between us. My dear, kind, faithful, gloomy old cousin! I can
like you now, and admire you too, sir, and say that you are
brave, and very kind, and very true, and a fine gentleman for all
- for all your little mishap at your birth," says she, wagging her
arch head. "And now, sir," says she with a courtesy, «< we must
have no more talk except when mamma is by, as his Grace is
with us; for he does not half like you, cousin, and is jealous as
the black man in your favorite play. "
Though the very kindness of the words stabbed Mr. Esmond
with the keenest pang, he did not show his sense of the wound
by any look of his (as Beatrix indeed afterward owned to him);
but said with a perfect command of himself, and an easy smile,
"The interview must not end yet, my dear, until I have had my
last word. Stay, here comes your mother! " (Indeed she came in
here with her sweet anxious face; and Esmond, going up, kissed
her hand respectfully. ) "My dear lady may hear too the last
words, which are no secrets, and are only a parting benediction
accompanying a present for your marriage from an old gentle-
man your guardian; for I feel as if I was the guardian of all
the family, and an old fellow that is fit to be the grandfather of
you all; and in this character let me make my lady duchess her
wedding present. They are the diamonds my father's widow
left me.
I had thought Beatrix might have had them a year.
ago; but they are good enough for a duchess, though not bright
enough for the handsomest woman in the world. " And he took
the case out of his pocket in which the jewels were, and pre-
sented them to his cousin.
She gave a cry of delight, for the stones were indeed very
handsome, and of great value; and the next minute the necklace.


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14689
was where Belinda's cross is in Mr. Pope's admirable poem,
and glittering on the whitest and most perfectly shaped neck in
all England.
The girl's delight at receiving these trinkets was. so great
that, after rushing to the looking-glass and examining the effect
they produced upon that fair neck which they surrounded, Bea-
trix was running back with her arms extended, and was perhaps
for paying her cousin with a price that he would have liked no
doubt to receive from those beautiful rosy lips of hers; but at
this moment the door opened, and his Grace the bridegroom elect
was announced.
He looked very black upon Mr. Esmond, to whom he made
a very low bow indeed, and kissed the hand of each lady in his
most ceremonious manner. He had come in his chair from the
palace hard by, and wore his two stars of the Garter and the
Thistle.
"Look, my lord duke," says Mistress Beatrix, advancing to
him and showing the diamonds on her breast.
"Diamonds," says his Grace. "Hm! they seem pretty. "
"They are a present on my marriage," says Beatrix.
"From her Majesty? " asks the duke. "The Queen is very
good. "
"From my Cousin Henry- from our Cousin Henry," cry both
the ladies in a breath.
"I have not the honor of knowing the gentleman. I thought
that my Lord Castlewood had no brother; and that on your
Ladyship's side there were no nephews. "
"From our cousin, Colonel Henry Esmond, my lord," says
Beatrix, taking the colonel's hand very bravely,
« who was left
guardian to us by our father, and who has a hundred times shown.
his love and friendship for our family. "
"The Duchess of Hamilton receives no diamonds but from
her husband, madam," says the duke: "may I pray you to
restore these to Mr. Esmond? >>
"Beatrix Esmond may receive a present from our kinsman and
benefactor, my Lord Duke," says Lady Castlewood with an air
of great dignity. "She is my daughter yet; and if her mother
sanctions the gift, no one else has the right to question it. "
"Kinsman and benefactor! " says the duke. "I know of no
kinsman; and I do not choose that my wife should have for bene-
factor a- »
XXV-919


## p. 14690 (#264) ##########################################

14690
WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
"My lord! " says Colonel Esmond.
"I am not here to bandy words," says his Grace: "frankly
I tell you that your visits to this house are too frequent, and that
I choose no presents for the Duchess of Hamilton from gentle-
men that bear a name they have no right to. "
"My lord! " breaks out Lady Castlewood, "Mr. Esmond hath
the best right to that name of any man in the world; and 'tis as
old and as honorable as your Grace's. "
My lord duke smiled, and looked as if Lady Castlewood was
mad, that was so talking to him.
"If I called him benefactor," said my mistress, "it is because
he has been so to us- yes, the noblest, the truest, the bravest,
the dearest of benefactors. He would have saved my husband's
life from Mohun's sword. He did save my boy's, and defended
him from that villain. Are these no benefits? "
"I ask Colonel Esmond's pardon," says his Grace, if possible
more haughty than before. "I would say not a word that should
give him offense, and thank him for his kindness to your Lady-
ship's family. My Lord Mohun and I are connected, you know,
by marriage-though neither by blood nor friendship; but I
must repeat what I said, that my wife can receive no presents
from Colonel Esmond. "
"My daughter may receive presents from the Head of our
House; my daughter may thankfully take kindness from her
father's, her mother's, her brother's dearest friend, and be grate-
ful for one more benefit besides the thousand we owe him," cries
Lady Esmond. "What is a string of diamond stones compared
to that affection he hath given us-our dearest preserver and
benefactor? We owe him not only Frank's life, but our all — yes,
our all," says my mistress, with a heightened color and a trem-
bling voice. "The title we bear is his, if he would claim it. "Tis
we who have no right to our name: not he that's too great for
it. He sacrificed his name at my dying lord's bedside — sacri-
ficed it to my orphan children; gave up rank and honor because
he loved us so nobly. His father was Viscount of Castlewood and
Marquis of Esmond before him; and he is his father's lawful
son and true heir, and we are the recipients of his bounty, and
he the chief of a house that's as old as your own. And if he
is content to forego his name that my child may bear it, we
love him and honor him and bless him under whatever name he
bears" and here the fond and affectionate creature would have


## p. 14691 (#265) ##########################################

WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14691
knelt to Esmond again but that he prevented her; and Beatrix,
running up to her with a pale face and a cry of alarm, embraced
her and said, "Mother, what is this? "
"Tis a family secret, my lord duke," says Colonel Esmond:
"poor Beatrix knew nothing of it, nor did my lady till a year
ago. And I have as good a right to resign my title as your
Grace's mother to abdicate hers to you. "
"I should have told everything to the Duke of Hamilton,"
said my mistress, "had his Grace applied to me for my daugh-
ter's hand, and not to Beatrix. I should have spoken with you
this very day in private, my lord, had not your words brought
about this sudden explanation; and now 'tis fit Beatrix should
hear it, and know, as I would have all the world know, what we
owe to our kinsman and patron. "
And then in her touching way, and having hold of her
daughter's hand, and speaking to her rather than my lord.
duke, Lady Castlewood told the story which you know already
-lauding up to the skies her kinsman's behavior. On his side
Mr. Esmond explained the reasons, that seemed quite sufficiently
cogent with him, why the succession in the family, as at present
it stood, should not be disturbed; and he should remain as he
was, Colonel Esmond.
"And Marquis of Esmond, my lord," says his Grace, with a
low bow; "permit me to ask your Lordship's pardon for words
that were uttered in ignorance, and to beg for the favor of your
friendship. To be allied to you, sir, must be an honor under
whatever name you are known" (so his Grace was pleased to
say); "and in return for the splendid present you make my wife,
your kinswoman, I hope you will be pleased to command any
service that James Douglas can perform. I shall never be easy
until I repay you a part of my obligations at least; and ere very
long, and with the mission her Majesty hath given me," says the
duke, "that may perhaps be in my power. I shall esteem it as
a favor, my lord, if Colonel Esmond will give away the bride. ”
"And if he will take the usual payment in advance, he is wel-
come," says Beatrix, stepping up to him; and as Esmond kissed
her, she whispered, "Oh, why didn't I know you before? "
My lord duke was as hot as a flame at this salute, but said
never a word; Beatrix made him a proud curtsy, and the two
ladies quitted the room together.


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14692
WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
BEFORE THE BATTLE OF WATERLOO
From Vanity Fair'
THE
HERE never was, since the days of Darius, such a brilliant
train of camp-followers as hung round the train of the
Duke of Wellington's army in the Low Countries, in 1815;
and led it dancing and feasting, as it were, up to the very brink
of battle. A certain ball which a noble duchess gave at Brus-
sels on the 15th of June in the above-named year is historical.
All Brussels had been in a state of excitement about it; and I
have heard from ladies who were in that town at the period,
that the talk and interest of persons of their own sex regarding
the ball was much greater even than in respect of the enemy in
their front. The struggles, intrigues, and prayers to get tickets
were such as only English ladies will employ, in order to gain
admission to the society of the great of their own nation.
Jos and Mrs. O'Dowd, who were panting to be asked, strove
in vain to procure tickets; but others of our friends were more
lucky. For instance, through the interest of my Lord Bareacres,
and as a set-off for the dinner at the restaurateur's, George got
a card for Captain and Mrs. Osborne; which circumstance greatly
elated him. Dobbin, who was a friend of the general command-
ing the division in which their regiment was, came laughing
one day to Mrs. Osborne, and displayed a similar invitation; which
made Jos envious, and George wonder how the deuce he should
be getting into society. Mr. and Mrs. Rawdon, finally, were of
course invited, as became the friends of a general commanding
a cavalry brigade.
On the appointed night, George, having commanded new
dresses and ornaments of all sorts for Amelia, drove to the
famous ball, where his wife did not know a single soul. After
looking about for Lady Bareacres,-who cut him, thinking the
card was quite enough,- and after placing Amelia on a bench, he
left her to her own cogitations there; thinking on his own part
that he had behaved very handsomely in getting her new clothes,
and bringing her to the ball, where she was free to amuse her-
self as she liked. Her thoughts were not of the pleasantest, and
nobody except honest Dobbin came to disturb them.
Whilst her appearance was an utter failure (as her husband
felt with a sort of rage), Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's début was, on


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WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY
14693
the contrary, very brilliant. She arrived very late. Her face
was radiant; her dress perfection. In the midst of the great
persons assembled, and the eye-glasses directed to her, Rebecca
seemed to be as cool and collected as when she used to marshal
Miss Pinkerton's little girls to church. Numbers of the men she
knew already, and the dandies thronged round her. As for the
ladies, it was whispered among them that Rawdon had run away
with her from out of a convent, and that she was a relation of
the Montmorency family. She spoke French so perfectly that
there might be some truth in this report, and it was agreed that
her manners were fine, and her air distingué.