No More Learning

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? Shadows of the Past 13
Undoubtedly serious conflicts took place between his parents.
This fact is brought out by the following remarks of his sister:
"The married life of my parents was not peaceful. That was
due to my father's strong personality, his sharp criticism, and
his great demands upon his family. We children let Mother
spoil us, we confided in her, but to us Father was the supreme
judge.
"Today, as a mature woman, I judge my parents' life in
quite a different light. I think that because of her many chil-
dren, because of her wonderful but difficult husband, my
mother had a hard task which she could manage only with the
greatest mental and physical difficulty. She was ill and suffered
for years from bronchio-catarrh. I am certain of one thing: with
an average, ordinary husband, my mother would undoubtedly
have been a happy wife. . . . He [my father] loved her dearly
as a woman, and she loved him, only him. But there were
storms in their life which darkened our youth" (Letter XXIII).
Undoubtedly the disharmony between his parents impressed
young Otto deeply. Having a highly gifted but severe father
and a mother of quite ordinary talents affected his sensitive
mind. The close mental relationship with his father naturally
led Otto to side with him in making demands on his mother.
Even more. Apparently Otto tried to identify himself with his
father and developed hostility--unconscious though it may
have been--toward his mother. There can be little doubt that
his father's severity to his mother was instrumental in forming
the devastating view of women Otto later held.
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? Towards the
Future
During the years 1890-1898 Otto Weininger attended
elementary and secondary school, from which he was
graduated on July 14,1898. He was a good student, with keen
curiosity and an avid thirst for knowledge. Otto was familiar
with philosophical and historical literature utterly unknown
to his comrades, and he was the best of his class in history and
languages. His gift for the latter had developed to such an ex-
tent that at the age of eighteen he knew Latin and Greek, spoke
French, English, and Italian well, and was fluent in Spanish
and Norwegian. At this time, perhaps as a result of his father's
influence, he took no particular interest in science or mathe-
matics. His grades were excellent, except for those in deport-
ment, which were poor because he would not bow to the
ordinary school routine. He always did his school work in his
own way, rarely in the way his teachers wished. He ignored
them and busied himself with his own books or engaged in
writing on his own account. Since he was occupied with his
private affairs, he certainly was not talkative as a student,
although it is claimed that he took an eager part in discussions.
The picture we can thus form of the young Otto is that of
a boy far ahead of his schoolmates in knowledge; he was self-
confident, independent. His desire for, and accumulation of,
learning made him critical of his teachers, and he was able to
put embarrassing questions to them. He followed his own
path.
This feeling of independence was partly at least a product
of his upbringing and of the close relationship between the
boy and his father. Their mutual ties were strong, and Otto
continued to be much more attached to his father than to
his mother. His friend Lucka said in Der Tag: "I think Otto
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? Towards the Future 15
received a greater heritage from his father. He loved him more
than he did his mother; the deep, dark inner life was common
to them. "
His son's resemblance to him also led Leopold Weininger
to take a keener interest in Otto's upbringing. He watched the
development of the boy and the young man carefully. He
noted and encouraged his son's talent for acquiring knowl-
edge. The father, with his philological interests, fostered Otto's
special ability at learning languages. He also shared his musical
experiences with all his children, but especially with his favor-
ite, Otto. Very early he had introduced his son to concerts
and had familiarized him with Wagner and Mozart. When
Otto was six his father took him to hear Der Freischiitz, and
at the age of eight he heard Die Meistersinger for the first time
(Letter VI). Otto may almost be said to have "inherited" his
romantic love for Wagner's music. So much was this true that
Wagner became the most beloved composer in the last years
of the young man's life. The influence of the father upon the
son was significantly strong.
This relationship affected the boy's education and may be
one reason why he tended to live in the realm of his books
and his own thoughts. As his father said: "There was one thing
Otto would never share with anyone--his books. He lived in
complete isolation with them. " 1 We might well expect to
find Otto later searching, as he did, through books for some-
thing of which he was not yet aware. We may assume that
even as a young boy his mental preoccupation was such that
he had no time for playing games with his comrades.
He was bound to feel a sentimental affection for his father.
Mingled with this affection was fear (which was shared by
the other children) because of his father's uncompromising
and rigid principles. "In his home and with his numerous chil-
dren, he (Leopold Weininger) maintained severe discipline. " 2
The family conflict which had affected the child continued
1 Ferdinand Probst, Der Fall Otto Weininger (in Grenzfragen des Nerven-
und Seelenlebens, Wiesbaden, 1904), p. 5. Later cited in the text as Der Fall.
* Paul Biro, Die Sittlichkeitsmetapnysik Otto Weiningers (Vienna, 1927).
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? Towards the Future
to influence the proud, shy boy. The patriarchal father stood
with authority above his wife and children. Since Otto was
sensitive, he could not have been unaware of his mother's suf-
fering, and she, for her part, must have sought sympathy from
the children. Thus, while he was seeking to identify himself
with his father, he very well may also have identified himself
with the suffering of his mother--an identification he repudi-
ated throughout his life.
To this family combination Otto found it difficult to adapt
himself. Even if he sought identification with his father, he
also to some extent resented and feared paternal authority.
Even if he sympathized with his mother, he also resented her.
His situation (Oedipus situation) in the home seemed complex.
Usually a child feels such contradictory feelings of love and
hate toward one or the other parent, and while he is young the
contrary feelings may simply exist side by side for the time
being. Yet as the ego of the boy gradually strengthens, the op-
posite strivings increase to the point of conflict. The boy then
begins to understand that against his identification-love for his
father and his love for his mother is pitted resentment of his
father (positive Oedipus complex). In Otto's case, however,
the home environment fostered identification-love for his
father and strong resentment of his mother, and thus he ap-
parently had a negative Oedipus complex. The conscious or
unconscious hatred of his mother, which seems to have domi-
nated his infantile sexual period, persisted in his boyhood and
manhood. He did not succeed in overcoming his infantile
sexual drives, which were later detrimental to him.
Homeless in his own home, Otto sought even more the refuge
of his books. His highly individual talents and his developing
personality also made Otto go his own way. Intellectually far
more mature than his companions, he naturally found it diffi-
cult to adapt himself to his surroundings and his schoolmates.
Even if his talents and his knowledge acted as incentive and
inspiration, he must also have felt them as a burden and a
hindrance to his happiness at school. His awakening ego made
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? Towards the Future 17
it hard for him to adapt himself socially, his inner strivings
virtually compelling queer behavior. At school he showed a
haughty nature and an addiction to fantasy. But there was
something more. There was a definite aim in his behavior,
however unconscious he may have been of it originally. His
actions showed clearly that he never intended to subordinate
himself to the laws ruling others. Even in early youth he placed
himself outside the affairs of ordinary human beings and ordi-
nary society--a tendency he later followed to an extreme.
Behind his every act and expression there was determination.
The force of his will was powerful, and he seemed ready to
push his way to the uttermost limits in order to reach his goal.
Yet it was the exercise of the will rather than the goal itself;
that was important. Otto was moved more by the wish to
prove that he could go to extremes than by a real desire to go
there. He wanted to demonstrate the forcefulness of his will
more than he wanted to perpetrate his will in action. This
motive showed plainly in examples of his self-assertion. One
such instance occurred when his secondary schooling was fin-
ished. His father then issued a patriarchal command that he
enter the Consular Academy to study languages. Otto flatly
refused. Instead, he entered the University of Vienna, thus
causing a rift between his father and himself.
When we try to reconstruct Weininger's original personality,
we note that his extraordinary environment tended to make
of him a lonely and spoiled boy. His isolation was nourished,
to a large extent, by his marked intellectual gifts, which gave
him an advantage over his companions. His superiof intellect
caused him to stay away from his schoolmates, and his isola-
tion increased, growing more and more pronounced. In him,
too, there was rooted a sense of his own superiority. A strong
(primary) narcissism was a basic element in his personality
that made itself felt throughout his life. In his teens his talents
and individuality caused him to resist the authority of the
school and carried him on to ever stronger self-assertion and
self-confidence. Even as a boy he rejected, as far as he could,
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? 18 Towards the Future
any outside help or control. He did not want others meddling
in his affairs; he considered interference a threat to his person-
ality, and therefore protected himself against it. Throughout
his life he stood ready to defend himself with speed and vigor.
Yet the very necessity for this defense showed how vulnerable
he was, though he hid his sensitiveness behind a calm, self-
assured face. He always reacted violently when he felt that his
dignity had been wounded. "What he considered right and just
he defended with courage far beyond his years" (Taschenbuch,
p. 13).
His self-esteem was great beyond all proportion because it
was rooted in a narcissistic fixation, which was partially caused
by his environment. When he was hurt, he overcompensated
for his injury by taking on a still higher opinion of himself.
He not only clung to his narcissism; he also increased it through
the years as he built his self-admiration to dizzying heights and
expressed it in grotesque actions and the choice of unobtain-
able goals. We may safely surmise that this type of narcissism
was one point of departure for the development of the ascetic-
masochistic attitude that was ultimately fatal to him.
Several incidents in his later years showed clearly that
this vulnerability and defensiveness persisted. Toward the end
of 1900 or early in 1901 he accused a man of playing a fool
trick on him and challenged him to a duel. That he himself
did not know how to use a sword and that his opponent was
his physical superior seemed matters of minor importance
to Otto Weininger. Despite these handicaps he wounded his
adversary in the duel while he himself did not suffer a scratch
(Taschenbuch, p. 13). Another event that showed Otto's met-
tle took place in 1902, probably in the spring. He was asked
to be a collaborator in a new literary enterprise. Since he was
a financially poor student, this job meant economic independ-
ence to him. But when a conflict arose between the editor and
a friend of Weininger's, he was forced either to break with the
friend or to sacrifice his job. He had the moral courage to de-
clare his agreement with the friend, and he freely told the
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? ADELHEID WEININGER
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? Towards the Future 19
t
publisher so. He unhesitatingly sacrificed his job and its fixed
income.
His pronounced critical attitude toward every type of author-
ity, expressed in his strong opposition to the school, probably
had its roots in his revolt against the environment of his child-
hood. His father's attitude here was of major importance. Re-
sistance to authority grew from the mingled affection and fear
Otto felt for the father who, as Otto's sister said, "knew no
moderation in his severity and criticism. He was loved and
feared by us all. . . . If we ever told a lie, he would punish us
at once. His demands upon us were enormous; if we did not
live up to them, he was mortally wounded" (Letter XIV).
Sensitiveness, self-assertion, and isolation from his environ-
ment were bound together in the arrogant and rebellious boy.
He was ever being driven further into his isolation. When he
was twenty he was to be talking to a conference of psychologists
on introspection as the most important method of exploring
the mind! Throughout his later life he showed a fear of re-
vealing himself. The persistent tendency to conceal his inner
life must have been firmly rooted in his boyhood and must
have come from his wish to cover up his sexual urges.
In a letter written some years later, he wrote to a friend:
"Apart from the life you know, I lead two or three other
lives of which you know nothing. I tell you this, and I must
beg of you never to try to find them out. " The statement re-
veals what must have been a characteristic tendency in Otto
Weininger when he was still a schoolboy. He felt division be-
tween his external activity, which brought him in contact with
the outer world, and his inner activity. His "two or three other
lives"--that is, the other way of life for Otto--were, and can
be regarded as, nothing but his secret existence deep in his
mind. There seems to have been developed in the boy a pro-
nounced contradiction in his mental life. On the surface he
was apparently in good rapport with the external world. In
the deeper layer of his mind he led his hidden life. There
was the world of his surging desires and sexual cravings, his
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? 20
Towards the Future
dreams, his hopes, and his fantasies. That world was, as we
shall see later, both sacred and profane, good and evil, the
home of God and Devil. Between this secret realm and the
external world there was opposition that led to great conflict.
Within him romantic feelings must have waned with a
more or less realistic attitude even when he was quite young.
He enjoyed nature in the most romantic fashion. Once in the
middle of a winter some years later he rented a garden room
in Gersthof, a suburb of Vienna, so that he might be near
the woods. 8 Indeed his love of nature seems to have been
strong, discriminating, and very comprehensive; the most
superb thing for him was a sunset; water in all its shapes had
strong meaning--the spring was birth, the river the Apol-
lonian principle, the ocean the Dionysian principle (U. L. D. ,
p. 9). His view not only was romantic but also was a fusion
of rational analysis with emotion.
A contradiction seems to have appeared in him as early as
his days in secondary school: a desire for life, a longing for
reality, which contrasted with his isolation from that same
reality--a separation which was later to develop so far that
he became afraid of life. In "Verdamnis" (translated in full at
the end of the Appendix), he said: "The artist always loves
himself; the philosopher hates himself. A glorious love is cre-
ated in the artist by the least sign of love and respect, while
the philosopher as such is never loved. But when one is mis-
judged and still loved, then one becomes hard, hard until one
is compassionate with oneself! . . .
"That is the worst: not being able to love when one is loved
and knows one is loved, with hatred toward that bitter feeling
of a desire to love deep down in the heart. This petrifaction,
this barrenness! An olive tree on the hardest granite! My soul
cannot free itself and enter into that of another who loves
me! "
He seems to have sought to establish relations with others,
1 Emfl Lucka, Otto Wefninger: Der Mensch und sein Werk (Vienna, 1905),
p. 6. Cited later in the text as Lucka.
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? Towards the Future
21
to join with the crowd. Yet to think that he enjoyed being in
the crowd would be a mistake. When he was part of a group,
he was with the others only superficially. He wanted to belong
to them, to share with them in youthful activity, so strong
was his longing for life. And yet he was freezing within, alone.
His contradictory feelings come through to expression in a
poem he wrote a little later, probably after one of his night
wanderings. His sister was kind enough to give me the poem,
which has never before been published.
SCHAUDER
Allmahlich kehr ich heim an diese Statte
Mit miiden Sinnen, schlaff und ohne Kraft;
Wie jeder andere ist der Tag verronnen.
Der Mond ist da, soil trosten fiir die Sonnen.
Des Winters schweigend' mitleidslose Kalte,
Der Himmel starr in seinem Leichentuch:
Es schneit in meinem Herzen, seine Sehnsucht
Erfrieret langsam vor des Lebens Zucht.
SHIVERING
Slowly my steps turn homeward to this place,
With weary soul, abject and powerless.
Like any other this day's course has run;
The moon is there, as solace for the sun.
Wrapped in the winter's mute, unpitying cold,
The sky is stiff and stark within its shroud.
With deeper winter, snow falls in my heart,
Where longing freezes ere life's growth can start.
His earnest desire for life evolves into a hatred and fear of it.
The stronger the longing, the stronger the fear.
The division within him appeared in many contradictory
and irreconcilable attitudes in the form of ambivalency (the
coexistence of antithetic and contrary tendencies) and split-
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? 22
Towards the Future
ting. This affective ambivalency became gradually apparent in
his attitudes toward women and toward Jews.
Ambivalency he had deeply ingrained in him. He came to
recognize his own worth consciously, but at the same time
he was struggling to conquer his sexual desires, his "lower
ego. " When in the world of his imagination, he was secure
in self-satisfaction. When faced with the world of reality, he
lost his sense of security and his confidence in himself. Because
reality thus threatened at any moment to destroy his. morbid
self-esteem, he was under a tightening strain. Hence, he clung
more firmly than ever to self-exaltation and transformed it into
a self-idolatry which was, of course, rooted in his narcissism.
Otto exaggerated his own imaginary strength and virility, and,
therefore, he felt compelled to exhibit his talents passionately.
His desire for attention was imperative, and in various activities
he gave symbolic expression to his urge.
Thus his self-assertion changed as external circumstances
varied, but it was always present and it grew stronger as his
life progressed. His letters from the summer of 1902 were
typical expressions of the strengthened feeling. "Today," he
wrote, "I have discovered in myself a special musical imag-
ination . . . which has filled me with great self-respect. "
Every detail of his actions took on great significance for him.
"I have now personally seen the Sistine Madonna," he wrote.
And: "On a two-day sea journey I am now being tested as to
whether I am a good sailor . . . I am a good sailor. "
The first page of Sex and Character contains bold, confident
language that expresses Weininger's self-exaltation. "This book
is an attempt to place sex relations in a new and decisive light.
It is an attempt not to collect the greatest number of distin-
guished authorities or to arrange into a system all the results
of scientific measurement and experiment, but to refer to a
single principle the whole contrast between man and woman.
In this respect the book differs from all other works on the
same subject. The investigation is here not of details, but of a
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? fey /tUu* *oT
FACSIMILE OF THE POEM "SCHAUDER"
IN WEININGER'S HANDWRITING
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? 24 Towards the Future
principle. " He certainly regarded his own investigations with
admiration and respect.
When contact with reality made him feel weak and power-
less, he found his defense in a corresponding increase of his self-
esteem. Thus he was always mild in manner when treating with
subordinates, such as maids, other servants, and people of
lower social standing, but he was in angry revolt against all
authority (see Der Fall, pp. 6-7). But when he felt superior
to the world, he wanted to pretend that he was unimportant.
When he gave a few coins to a beggar, he would, according
to Rappaport, always take off his hat--"so that he would not
make the beggar ashamed. " Such behavior is merely an ex-
pression of self-praise.
On December 27, 1901, we find him writing modestly to
Professor Jodl: "The poor style and lack of proportion in my
manuscript are only too clear to me; and it makes me even
sadder because my subject would tolerate and deserves a good
and formally beautiful treatment. " Here it is interesting to
note the mixture of self-abasement and self-exaltation and to
see how his feeling of inferiority about his work was quickly
converted to superiority.
These feelings, which appeared in exaggerated form in his
later life, were undoubtedly present in the schoolboy. From
early years his mind had difficulty in adapting itself to a situa-
tion; his mood and the accompanying actions were always
above or below the circumstances.
It would seem, then, that his attitude was wrong--or at
least odd--because of the contradictions within him. And we
may certainly guess not only that even in his schooldays he
was different from others but also that he enjoyed the feeling
of being different. His maladjustment was basically due to his
strong inner conflict, accompanied as it was by symptoms of
anxiety and fear--in short, of manifestations which appeared
on the surface as neurotic.
One may properly believe that these conflicts in his per-
sonality structure gave rise to his ever-flowing spring of self-
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? Towards the Future 25
reflection and self-contemplation. Early in Sex and Character
he wrote: "It is easier for the complex man to understand an-
other person when he has within himself simultaneously the
nature of that other person and its opposite. Duality is the
condition for noticing and understanding. " This statement is
made with so much passion that one may suspect that Wein-
inger actually enjoyed having those contradictions within him-
self.
The contrasts in Otto Weininger did not necessarily imply
a split personality or the existence of a psychosis--at least not
in his schooldays. They merely showed that his personality
make-up was peculiar, and we may find hints of this peculiar-
ity in several other members of his family. His father, his
brother Richard, and his sisters Mathilde and Karoline all
have the same aberrant mentality, though there is no evidence
of insanity in the family (Letter X). Looking deeper into the
family background, we find that several members of the fam-
ily, particularly his father, Richard, and Karoline, reveal intel-
lectual and artistic gifts. Another peculiar fact is that we find
lightheartedness in some members of the family. Finally we
also see in some of Otto's relatives the same ambiguity shown
in himself. That discovery would seem to support the belief
that there were in the family some odd traits which most prob-
ably had a schizoid coloring. 4
In Otto this ambiguity and these contradictions were to com-
bine with a flow of neurotic manifestations. Here was the be-
ginning of the course that ended in mental crisis. The duality
which was first present in his own mind he later found in ex-
treme form in the external world.
* A schizoid person is to a greater or a lesser degree unable to adjust to a
situation. His most outstanding trait is his autism, the tendency to be en-
grossed in himself. This agocentriciry seems to be closely related to the per-
son's sexual life, his autoeroticism, which is the root of narcissism.
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? The City by
the River
If ever duality existed, it was in the city of Vienna. On the
surface gaiety, in the depths despair. On the surface a strug-
gle for life, in the depths a struggle against death. Before the
glittering background of "wine, women, and song" revelry
for which Vienna was famous, a nagging, ceaseless warfare
for existence went on. Every situation, whether in daily life
or in art, science, or philosophy, came to be a testing of reality.
Such testing was taking place throughout Europe in the late
nineteenth century: in Paris, in London, in Berlin, and, last
but not least, in Vienna.
This dualism showed, too, in the physical aspects of Vienna.
Vienna late in the nineteenth century was a changing city, not
only in its spiritual life, but in its very physical appearance.
Its medieval look was vanishing. The Ringstrasse was modern,
luxurious, and aristocratic. On it stood the opera house in its
French Renaissance elegance, while the new museums and the
other new buildings near by--the Burg theater, the Parlia-
ment buildings, the Rathaus--clustered about on the Rathaus-
park. All were splendid, and in going through the parks, the
Rathauspark, the Heldenplatz, the Volksgarten, the Marie-
Theresien-Platz, one could look about and wonder if Vienna
were not indeed a worthy rival of Paris.
As Paris had the Seine, so Vienna had the Danube. The
city was mostly on the right bank, but only one arm of the
river passed through Vienna. Across the Danube Canal and
between the canal and the mainstream lay the commercial
quarter, inhabited by many Jews. The Danube was one of the
links between Vienna and the surrounding world. The Danube,
blue as at times it might be, gave the city force as well as
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? City by the River 27
beauty. The Viennese loved it. The blue Danube belonged to
Vienna just as much as the buildings rooted in the earth of
the city.
In that city stood the buildings of the University, in pleasant
Renaissance style. The University itself was founded in 1365,
the oldest German foundation. For its scientific standing it
was Vienna's pride.
Not far from the University was the Votivkirche, which was
built in memory of Francis Joseph's escape from an attempted
assassination.