No More Learning

W hatdothitheraldtous? " L . E . L .
A t these words a mortal paleness overspread her coun-
tenance; her eyes closed; and she would have fallen to the
earth, had not O swald rushed to support her.
CHAPTER V.
Corinne revived: the affecting interest of O swald' s look
restored her to some composure. The N eapolitans were
surprised at the gloomy character of her poetry, much as
they admired it. They thought it the Muse' s task to dis-
sipate the cares of life, and not to ex plore their terrible
secrets; but the E nglish who were present seemed deeply
touched. Their own melancholy, embellished by I talian
imagination, delighted them. This lovely woman, whose
features seemed designed to depict felicity,-- this child of
the sun, a prey to hidden grief,-- was lik e a flower, still
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? 230CO R I N N E ; O R I TA L Y .
(
fresh and brilliant, but within whose leaves may be seen
the first dark impress of that withering blight which soon
shall lay it low. The party embark ed to return: the
glowing calm of the hour made it a lux ury to be upon the
sea. Goethe has described, in a delicious romance, the
passion felt, in warm climates, for the water. A nymph
of the flood boasts to the fisherman the charms of her
abode; invites him to taste its refreshment, and, by degrees,
allures him to his death. This magic of the tide resembles
that of the basilisk , which fascinates by fear. The wave
rising gently afar, swelling, and hurrying as it nears the
shore, is but a type of passion that dawns in softness, but
soon grows invincible. Corinne put back her tresses, that
she might better enj oy the air: her countenance was thus
more beautiful than ever. The musicians, who followed
in another boat, poured forth enchantments that harmonised
with the stars, the sea, and the sweet intox ication of an
I talian evening. " O h, my heart' s love! " whispered O s-
wald, " can I ever forget this day, or ever enj oy a happier? "
H is eyes filled with tears. O ne of his most seductive
attributes was this ready yet restrained sensibility, which
so oft, in spite of him, bedewed his lids: at such moments
he was irresistible: sometimes even in the midst of an en-
dearing pleasantry, a melting thrill stole on his mirth, and
lent it a new, a noble charm. " A las! " returned Corinne,
" I hope not for another day lik e this; but be it blest, at
least, as the last such of my life, if forbidden to prove the
dawn of more endearing bliss. "
CH A PTE R V I .
The weather changed ere they reached N aples: the heavens
dark ened, and the coming storm, already felt in the air,
convulsed the waves, as if the sea sympathised with the
sk y. O swald preceded Corinne, that he might see the
flambeaux borne the more steadily before her. A s they
neared the q uay, he saw some L azzaroni assembled, crying
" Poor creature! he cannot save himself! we must be
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? corinne; O R I TA L Y . 231
patient. " -- " O f whom speak ye ? " cried N evil impetuously.
-- " A n old man," they replied, " who was bathing below
there, not far from the mole; but the storm has risen: he
is too weak to struggle with it. " O swald' s first impulse
was to plunge into the water; then reflecting on the alarm
he should cause Corinne, when she came, he offered all the
money he had with him, promising to double it, for the
man who would swim to this unfortunate being' s assistance;
but the L azzaroni all refused, saying, " I t cannot be, the
danger is too fearful. " A t that moment the old man sunk .
O swald could hesitate no longer: he threw off his coat,
and sprang into the sea, spite of its waves, that dashed
above his head: he buffetted them bravely; seized the
sufferer, who must have perished had he been a moment
later, and brought him to the land; but the sudden chill
and violent ex ertion so overwhelmed L ord N evil, that he
had scarcely seen his charge in safety, when he fell on the
earth insensible, and so pallid, that the by-standers believed
him a corpse. (10) I t was then that the unconscious
Corinne beheld the crowd, heard them cry, " H e is dead,"
and would have drawn back in terror; wherA he saw one of
the E nglishmen who had accompanied her, break eagerly
through the people: she made some steps to follow him;
and the first obj ect which met her eye was a portion of
O swald' s dress, lying on the bank . S he seized it with des-
peration, believing it all that was left of her love; and when
she saw him, lifeless as he appeared, she threw herself en
his breast, in transport, and ardently pressed him to her
heart: with what inex pressible rapture did she detect that
his still beat, perhaps re-animated by her presence! " H e
lives! " she cried, " he lives! " and instantly regained a
strength, a courage, such as his mere friends could scarcely
eq ual. S he sent for every thing that could revive him: and
herself applied these restoratives, supporting his fainting
head upon her breast, and, though she wept over it, for-
getting nothing, losing not a moment, nor permitting her
grief to interrupt her cares. O swald grew better, but re-
sumed not yet the use of his senses. S he had him carried to
his hotel, and, k neeling beside him, bathed his brow with
stimulating perfumes, calling on him in tones of impassioned
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? 232CO R I N N E ; O B I TA L Y .
tenderness that might have wak ed the dead. H e opened
his eyes, and pressed her hand. F or the j oy of such a
moment might one not endure the tortures of demons?
Poor human nature! W e guess at infinitude but by suf-
fering; and not a bliss in life can compensate the anguish
of beholding those we love ex pire. " Cruel, cruel! " cried
Corinne; " think what you have done ! " -- " Pardon," he
replied, in a trembling voice. " B elieve me, dearest, while
I thought myself dying, I trembled but for thee. "
q uisite ex pression of mutual love and confidence!
to her last day, could not recall those words without a
fondness, which, while it lasted, taught her to forgive
him all.
CH A PTE R V I I .
E x -
Corinne,
O swald' s nex t impulse was to thrust his hand into his bosom
for his father' s portrait: it was still there; but the water
had left it scarcely recognisable: he was bitterly afflicted
by this loss. " My God ! " he cried, " dost thou deny me
even his image? " Corinne besought his permission to
restore it: he consented, without much hope: what then
was his amaze, when, on the third morning she brought it
to him, not only repaired, but more faithful than ever!
" Y es," cried O swald, " you have divined his features and
his look . This heavenly miracle decides you for my life' s
companion, since to you is thus revealed the memory of
one who must for ever dispose my fate. H ere is the ring
my father gave his wife-- the sacred bond sincerely offered
by the noblest, and accepted by the most constant of hearts.
L et me transfer it from my hand to thine, and, while thou
k eepest it, be no longer free. I tak e this solemn oath, not
k nowing to whom, but in thy soul, I trust, that tells me
all: the events of your life, if springing from yourself,
must needs be lofty as your character. I f you have been
the victim to an unworthy fate, thank H eaven I can repair
it; therefore, my own Corinne, you owe your secrets to
one whose promises precede your confidence. " -- " O swald,"
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? corinne; or italy. 233
she answered, " this delirium is the result of a mistak e.
I cannot accept your ring till I have undeceived you.
A n inspiration of the heart, you think , taught me your
father' s features: I
often. " -- " S
ought to tell you that I have seen him
a moment' s pause; " I
swear never to wed another till you
een him!
how? when? where? O God!
who are you, then ? " -- " H ere is your ring," returned
Corinne, in a smothered tone. -- " N o," cried O swald, after
send hack that ring. F orgive the tumult you have raised
within me: confused and half-forgotten thoughts afflict my
mind. " -- " I see it," said Corinne; " and this shall end:
already your accents and your words are changed. Per-
haps when you have read my history, the horrid word
adieu" -- " N o,no," criedN evil; " onlyfrommy
death-hed-- fear not that word till then. " Corinne retired,
and, in a few moments, Theresina brought him the papers
which he was now to read.
BOOKXIV.
H I S TO R Y O F CO R I N N E .
CH A PTE R I .
" O swald, I begin with the avowal which must determine
my fate. I f, after reading it, you find it impossible to
pardon, do not finish this letter, but rej ect and banish me;
yet if, when you k now the name and destiny I have re-
nounced, all is not brok en between us, what follows may
then serve as my ex cuse.
" L ord E dgarmond was my father. I was born in I
his first wife was a R oman; and L ucy, whom they in-
tended for your bride, is my sister, by an E nglish lady,--
by my father' s second marriage. N ow, hear me! I
mother ere I was ten years old, and, as it was her dying
wish that my education should be finished ere I went to
taly:
lost my
E ngland, I was confided to an aunt at F lorence, with whom
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? 234CO R I N N E J O R I TA L Y .
I lived till I was fifteen. My tastes and talents were formed
ere her death induced L ord E dgarmond to have me with
him. H e lived at a small town in N orthumberland, which
cannot, I suppose, give any idea of E ngland; yet was all
I k new of it for six years. My mother, from my infancy,
impressed on me the misery of not living in I taly; my
aunt had often added, that this fear of q uitting her country
had brok en her heart. My good aunt herself was per-
suaded too that a Catholic would be condemned to perdition
for settling in a Protestant country ; and though I was not
infected by this fear, the thought of going to E ngland
alarmed me much. I set forth with an inex plicable sense
of sadness. The woman sent for me did not understand
a word of I talian. I spok e it now and then to console my
poor Theresina, who had consented to follow me, though
she wept incessantly at leaving her country; but I k new
that I must unlearn the habit of breathing the sweet sounds
so welcome even to foreigners, and, for me, associated with
all the recollections of my childhood. I approached the
north unable to comprehend the cause of my own changed
and sombre sensations. I t was five years since I had seen
my father. I hardly recognised him when I reached his
house. Methought his countenance was very grave; yet
he received me with tenderness, and told me I was ex -
tremely lik e my mother. My half-sister, then three years
of age, was brought to me: her sk in was fairer, her silk en
curls more golden than I
hardly any such faces in I
terested me from the first;
had ever seen before; we have
taly; she astonished and in-
that same day I cut off some
of her ringlets for a bracelet, which I have preserved ever
since. A t last my step-mother appeared, and the impres-
sion made on me by her first look grew and deepened dur-
ing the years I passed with her. L ady E dgarmond was
ex clusively attached to her native county; and my father,
whom she over-ruled, sacrificed a residence in L ondon or
E dinburgh to her wishes. S he was a cold, dignified, silent
person, whose eyes could turn affectionately on her child,
but who usually wore so positive an air, that it appeared
impossible to mak e her understand a new idea, or even one
phrase to which she had not been accustomed. S he met
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? corinne; or I taly. 235
me politely, but I soon perceived that my whole manner
amazed her, and that she proposed to change it, if she
could. N ot a word was said during dinner, though some
neighbours had been invited. I was so tired of this silence,.
that, in the midst of our meal, I strove to converse a tittle
with an old gentleman who sat beside me. I spok e E nglish
tolerably, as my father had taught me in childhood; but
happening to cite some I talian poetry, purely delicate, in
which there was some mention of love, my mother-in-law,
who k new the language slightly, stared at me, blushed, and
signed for the ladies, earlier than usual, to withdraw, pre-
pare tea, and leave the men to themselves during the des-
sert. * I k new nothing of this custom, which ' would not
be believed in V enice. ' -- S ociety agreeable without women!
-- F or a moment I thought her L adyship so displeased that
she could not remain in the same room with me; but I
was re-assured by her motioning me to follow, and never
reverting to my fault during the three hours we passed in
the drawing room, waiting for the gentlemen. A t supper,
however, she told me, gently enough, that it was not usual
in E ngland for young ladies to talk ; above all, they must
never think of q uoting poetry in which the name of love
occurred. ' Miss E dgarmond,' she added, ' you must en-
deavour to forget all that belongs to I taly: it is to be wished
that you had never k nown such a country. ' I passed the
night in tears, my heart was oppressed. I n the morning
I attempted to walk : there was so tremendous a fog that
I could not see the sun, which at least would have reminded
me of my own land; but I met my father, who said to me,
' My dear child, it is not here as in I taly; our women have
no occupations save their domestic duties. Y our talents
may beguile your solitude, and you may win a husband
who will pride in them; but in a country town lik e this,
all that attracts attention ex cites envy, and you will never
marry at all if it is thought that you have foreign manners.
H ere, every one must submit to the old prej
obscure county. I passed twelve years in I
mother: their memory is very dear to me. I
udices of an
taly with your
was young
? I f this was Cori line' s first E nglish dinner, how did she k now the usual
time for retiring? -- T<< .
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? 236 CO R I N N E ; O R I TA L Y .
then, and novelty delightful. I have now returned to my
original situation, and am q uite comfortahle; a regular,
perhaps rather a monotonous life, mak es time pass unper-
ceived; one must not combat the habits of a place in which
one is established; we should be the sufferers if we did,
for, in a scene lik e this, every thing is k nown, every thing
repeated; there is no room for emulation, but sufficient for
j ealousy; and it is better to bear a little ennui than to be
beset by wondering faces that every instant demand reasons
for what you do. ' -- My dear O swald, you can form no
idea of my anguish while my father spok e thus. I remem-
bered him all grace and vivacity, and I saw him stooping
beneath the leaden mantle which Dante invented for hell,
and which mediocrity throws over all who submit to her
yok e. E nthusiasm for nature and the arts seemed vanish-
ing from my sight; and my soul, lik e a useless flame, con-
sumed myself, having no longer any food from without.
A s I was naturally mild, my stepmother had nothing to
complain of in my behaviour towards her; and for my
father, I loved him tenderly. A conversation with him was
my only remaining pleasure; he was resigned, but he k new
that he was so; while the generality of our country gen-
tlemen drank , hunted, and slept, fancying such life the
wisest and best in the world. Their content so perplex ed
me, that I ask ed myself if my own way of think ing was
not a folly, and if this solid ex istence, which escaped grief,
in avoiding thought and sentiment, was not far more en-
viable than mine. W hat would such a conviction have
done for me? it must have taught me to deplore as a mis-
fortune that genius which in I taly was regarded as a bless-
ing from heaven.
" Towards the close of autumn the pleasures of the
chase freq uently k ept my father from home till midnight.
During his absence I remained mostly in my own room,
endeavouring to improve myself: this displeased L ady E d-
garmond. ' W hat good will it do? ' she said: ' will you
be any the happier for it? ' The words struck me with
despair.
W hat then is happiness, I thought, if it consist
not in the developement of our faculties? Might we not
as well k ill ourselves physically as morally? I f I must
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? corinne; O R I TA L Y . 237
stifle my mind, my soul, why preserve the miserable re-
mains of life that would but agitate me in vain? B ut I
was careful not to speak thus before my mother-in-law.
I had essayed it once or twice, and her reply was, that
women were made to manage their husbands' houses, and
watch over the health of their children: all other accom-
plishments were dangerous, and the best advice she could
give me was to hide those I possessed. This discourse,
though so common-place, was unanswerable; for enthu-
siasm is peculiarly dependent on encouragement, and
withers lik e a flower beneath a dark or freezing sk y.
There is nothing easier than to assume a high moral air,
while condemning all the attributes of an elevated spirit.
Duty, the noblest destination of man, may be distorted,"
<<
lik e all other ideas, into an offensive weapon by which nar-
row minds silence their superiors as their foes. O ne would
think , if believing them, that duty enj oined the sacrifice of
all the q ualities that confer distinction; that wit were a
fault, req uiring the ex piation of our leading precisely the
same lives with those who have. none; but does duty pre-
scribe lik e rules to all characters? A re not great thoughts
and generous feelings debts due to the world, from all who
are capable of paying them? O ught not every woman,
lik e every man, to follow the bent of her own talents?
Must we imitate the instinct of the bees, whose every sue.
ceeding swarm copies the last, without improvement or
variety? N o, O swald: pardon the pride of your Corinne,
I believed myself intended for a different career. Y et I
feel myself submissive to those I love as the females then
around me, who had neither j udgment nor wishes of their
own. I f it pleased you to pass your days in the heart of
S cotland, I should be happy to live and die with you: but
far from abj uring imagination, it would teach me the better
to enj oy nature, and the farther the empire of my mind
ex tended, the more glory should I feel in declaring you its
lord.
" L ady E dgarmond was almost as importunate respect-
ing my thoughts as my actions. I t sufficed not that I led
the same life as herself, it must be from the same motives;
for she wished all the faculties she did not share to be
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? 238
CO I I I N N E :O R I TA L Y .
look ed on as diseases. W e lived pretty near the sea; at
night the north wind whistled through the long corridorea
of our old castle; by day, even when we re-united, it was
wondrously favourable to our silence. The weather was
cold and damp: I could scarce ever leave the house with
pleasure. N ature now treated me with hostility, and
deepened my regrets of her sweetness and benevolence in
I taly. W ith the winter we removed into the city, if so I
may call a place without public buildings, theatre, music,
or pictures.
" I n the smallest I talian towns we have spectacles, im-
provisatores, zeal for the fine arts, and a glorious sun; we
feel that we live:-- but I almost forgot it in this assembly
of gossips, this depository of disgusts, at once monotonous
and varied. B irths, deaths, and marriages, composed the
history of our society; and these three events here differed
not the least from what they are elsewhere. F igure to
yourself what it must have been for me to be seated at a
tea-table, many hours each day after dinner, with my step-
mother' s guests. These were the seven gravest women in
N orthumberland:-- two were old maids of fifty, timid as
fifteen. O ne lady would say, ' My dear, do you think the
water hot enough to pour on the tea ? ' -- ' My dear,' re-
plied the other, ' I think it is too soon; the gentlemen are
not ready yet. '
-- ' Do you think they will sit late, to-day,
says a third. -- ' I don' t k now,' answers a
believe the election tak es place nex t week , so
my dear? '
fourth; '
I
perhaps they are staying to talk over it. ' -- ' N o,' rej oins a
fifth, ' I rather think that they are occupied by the fox -
hunt which occurred last week : there will be another on
Monday;
' A h!
silence. ?
life to this;
E very q
but for all that, I suppose they will come soon. '
--
I hardly ex pect it,' sighs the six th; and all again is
The convents I had seen in I taly appeared all
and I k new not what would become of me.
uarter of an hour some voice was raised to ask an
insipid q uestion, which received a luk ewarm reply; and
ennui fell back with redoubled weight on these poor wo-
men, who must have thought themselves most miserable,
* W hat a flattering picture of female society, at the country-house of an in.
telligent E nglish peer, not fifty years since! -- Tr.
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? CO R I N N E ; O R I TA L Y . 239
had not habit from infancy instructed them to endure it.
A t last the gentlemen came up; yet this long hoped for
moment brought no great change. They continued their
conversation round the fire: the ladies sat in the centre of
the room, distributing cups of tea; and, when the hour of
departure arrived, each went home with her husband,
ready for another day, differing from the last merely by its
date on the almanack . I cannot yet conceive how my
talent escaped a mortal chill. There is no denying that
every case has two sides; every subj ect may be attack ed
or defended; we may plead the cause of life, yet much is
to be said for death, or a state thus resembling it. S uch
was my situation. My voice was a sound either useless or
troublesome to its hearers. I could not, as in L ondon or
E dinburgh, enj oy the society of learned men, who, with a
taste for intellectual conversation, would have appreciated
that of a foreigner, even if she did not q uite conform with
the strict etiq uettes of their country. I sometimes passed
whole days with L ady E dgarmond and her friends, with-
out hearing one word that echoed either thought or feel-
ing, or beholding one ex pressive gesture. I look ed on the
faces of young girls, fair, fresh, and beautiful, but per-
fectly immovable. S trange union of contrasts! A
partook of the same amusements; they drank
ll ages
tea, and
played whist * : women grew old in this routine here.
Time was sure not to miss them ; he well k new where they
were to be found.
" A n automaton might have filled my place, and could
have done all that was ex pected of me. I n E ngland, as
elsewhere, the divers interests that do honour to humanity
worthily occupy the leisure of men, whatever their retire-
ment; but what remained for women in this isolated
corner of the earth? A mong the ladies who visited us
there were some not deficient in mind, though they con-
cealed it as a superfluity; and towards forty this slight im-
pulse of the brain was benumbed lik e all the rest. S ome
of them I suspected must, by reflection, have matured
their natural abilities; sometimes a look or murmured
accent told of thoughts that strayed from the beaten track ;
but the petty opinions, all powerful in their own little
* S pelt wisk in the original. -- Tfc.
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? 240CO R I N N E J O B I TA L Y .
sphere, repressed these inclinations. A woman was con_
sidered insane, or of doubtful virtue, if she ventured in
any way to assert herself; and, what was worse than all
these inconveniences, she could gain not one advantage by
the attempt. A t first I endeavoured to rouse this sleeping
world. I proposed poetic readings and music, and a day
was appointed for this purpose; but suddenly one woman
remembered that she had been three week s invited to sup
with her aunt; another that she was in mourning for an
old cousin she had never seen, and who had been dead for
months; a third that she had some domestic arrangements
to mak e at home; all very reasonable; yet thus for ever
were intellectual pleasures rej ected; and I so often heard
them say ' that cannot be done,' that, amid so many nega-
tions, not to live would have been to me the best of all.
A fter some debates with myself I gave up my vain
schemes, not that my father forbade them, he even enj oined
his wife to cease tormenting me on my studies; but her
insinuations, her stolen glances while I spok e, a thousand
trivial hinderances, lik e the chains the L illiputians wove
round Gulliver, rendered it impossible for me to follow my
own will; so I ended by doing as 1 saw others do, though
dying of impatience and disgust. B y the time I had
passed four weary years thus, I really found, to my severe
distress, that my mind grew dull, and, in spite of me, was
filled by trifles. W here no interest is tak en in science,
literature, and liberal pursuits, mere facts and insignificant
criticisms necessarily become the themes of discourse ; and
minds, strangers alik e to activity and meditation, become
so limited as to render all intercourse with them at once
tasteless and oppressive. There was no enj oyment near
me save in a certain methodical regularity, whose desire
was that of reducing all things to its own level; a constant
grief to characters called by heaven to destinies of their
own. The ill will I innocently ex cited, j oined with my
sense of the void all round me, seemed to check
breath. E nvy is only to be borne where it is ex
admiration; but oh the misery of living where j
even my
cited by
ealousy
itself awak ens no enthusiasm ! where we are hated as if
powerful, though in fact allowed less influence than the
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? CO R I N N E ; O R I TA L Y . 241
obscurest of our rivals. I t is impossible simply to de-
spise the opinions of the herd: they sink , in spite of us,
into the heart, and lie waiting the moments when our
own superiority has involved us in distress; then, then,
even an apparently temperate '
insupportable word we can hear. I
' such a man is unworthy to j
capable of comprehending me:'
power over the human heart;
secret disapprobation, it haunts us in defiance of our reason.
The circle which surrounds you always hides the rest of
the world: the smallest obj ect close before your eyes in-
tercepts their view of the sun. S o is it with the set among
whom we dwell: nor E urope nor posterity can render us
insensible to the intrigues of our nex t door neighbour;
and whoever would live happily in the cultivation of genius
ought to be, above all things, cautious in the choice of his
immediate mental atmosphere.
CH A PTE R I I .
" My only amusement was the education of my half-sister:
her mother did not wish her to learn music, but permitted
me to teach her drawing and I talian. I am persuaded
that she must still remember both; for I owe her the
j ustice to say that she, even then, evinced great intelligence.
O swald, if it was for your happiness I toiled, I shall bless
my efforts, even from the grave. I was now nearly twenty:
my father wished me to marry, and here the sad fatality
of my life began. L ord N evil was his intimate friend,
and it was yourself of whom he thought as my husband.
H ad we then met and loved, our fate would have been
cloudless. I had heard such praises of you, that, whether
from presentiment or pride, I was ex tremely flattered with
the hope of being your wife. Y ou were too young, for I
was eighteen months your elder; but your love of study,
they said, outstripped your age; and I formed so sweet
an idea of passing my days with such a character as yours
W ell? ' may prove the most
n vain we tell ourselves
udge me, such a woman is in-
the human face has great
and when we read there a
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? 242CO R I N N E ; O B I TA L Y .
was described, that I forgot all my prej
way of life usual to women in E ngland. I
that you would settle in E dinburgh or L
udices against the
k new, besides,
ondon; in either
place I was secure of finding congenial friends. I said
then, as I think now, that all my wretchedness sprung
from my being tied to a little town in the centre of a
northern county. Great cities alone can suit those who
deviate from hack neyed rules, if they design to live in
society: as life is varied there, novelties are welcome; but
where persons are content with a monotonous routine,
they love not to be disturbed by the occasional diversion,
which only shows them the tediousness of their every-day
life. I am pleased to tell you, O swald, though I had
never seen you, that I look ed forward with real anx
the arrival of your father, who was coming to pass a week
with mine. The sentiment had then too little motive to
have been aught less than a foreboding of my future.
iety to
W hen I was presented to L
but too ardently, to please him;
than was req uired for success;
ord N evil I desired, perhaps
and did infinitely more
displaying all my talents,
dancing, singing, and ex temporising before him: my long
imprisoned soul felt but too blest in break ing from its
chain. S even years of ex perience have calmed me. I
am more accustomed to myself. I k now how to wait.
I have, perchance, less confidence in the k indness of
others, less eagerness for their applause: indeed, it is
possible that there was then something strange about me!
W e have so much fire and imprudence in early youth, one
faces life with such vivacity! Mind, however distinguished,
cannot supply the work of time; and though we may speak
oftheworldasifwek newit,weneveractuptoourown
views: there is a fever in our ideas that will not let our
conduct conform with our reasonings. I believe, though not
with certainty, that I appeared to L ord N evil somewhat too
wild; for though he treated me very amiably, yet, when
he left my father, he said that, after due reflection, he
thought his son too young for the marriage in q uestion.
O swald, what importance do you attach to this confession?
I might suppress it, but I will not. I s it possible, how-
ever, that it will prove my condemnation? I am, I k now,
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? CO R I N N E ; O R I TA L Y . 243
tamed now; and could your parent have witnessed my love
for you, O swald you were dear to him, -- we should
have been heard. My stepmother now formed a proj ect for
marrying me to the son of her eldest brother, Mr. Mac.
linson, who had an estate in our neighbourhood. H e was
a man of thirty, rich, handsome, highly born, and of ho-
nourable character; but so thoroughly convinced of a hus-
band' s right to govern, and a wife' s duty to obey, that a
doubt on this subj ect would as much have shock ed him
as a q uestion of his own integrity. The rumours of
my eccentricity did not alarm him. H is house was so
ordered, the same things were every day performed there
so punctually to the minute, that any change was impos-
sible. The two old aunts who directed his establishment,
the servants, the very horses, could not to-morrow have
acted differently from yesterday; nay, the furniture, which
had served three generations, would have started of its own
accord had any thing new approached it. The effects of my
arrival, therefore, might well be defied. H abit there reign.
ed so securely, that any little liberties I might have tak en
would but have beguiled a q uarter of an hour once a week ,
without being of any farther conseq uence. Mr. Maclinson
was a good man, incapable of giving pain; yet had I
spok en to him of the innumerable annoyances which may
torment an active or a feeling mind, he would have merely
thought that I had the vapours, and bade me mount my
horse to tak e an airing. H e desired to marry me, because
he k new nothing about the wishes of imaginative beings,
and admired without understanding me: had he but guessed
that I was a woman of genius, he might have feared that
he could not please me; but no such anx iety ever entered
his head. J udge my repugnance against such an union.
I decidedly refused. My father supported me: his wife
from this moment cherished the deepest resentment:
she was a despot at heart, though timidity often prevented
her ex plaining her will: when it was not anticipated, she
lost her temper; but if resisted, after she had made the
effort of ex pressing it, she was the more unforgiving, for
having been thus fruitlessly drawn from her wonted reserve.
The whole town was loud in my blame. ' S o proper a
r2
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? 244CO R I N N E ; O E I TA L Y .
match, such a fortune, so estimable a man, of such a good
family! ' was the general cry. I strove to show them why
this very proper match could not suit me, and sometimes
made myself intelligible while speak ing; but when I was
gone, my words left no impression: former ideas returned;
and these old acq uaintance were the more welcome from
having been a moment banished. O ne woman, much more
mental than the rest, though she bowed to all their ex ternal
forms, took me aside, when 1 had spok en with more than
usual vivacity, and said a few words to me which I can
never forget: -- ' Y ou give yourself a great deal of trouble
to no purpose, my dear: you cannot change the nature of
things: a little northern town, unconnected with the world,
uncivilised by arts or letters, must remain what it is. I f
you are doomed to live here, submit cheerfully; but leave
it if you can: these are your only alternatives. ' This was
evidently so rational, that I felt a greater respect for her
than for myself: with tastes lik e enough to my own, she
k new how to resign herself beneath the lot which I found
insupportable: with a love of poetry, she could j udge
better than 1 the stubbornness of man. I sought to k now
more of her, but in vain: her thoughts wandered beyond
her home; but her life was devoted to it. I even believe
that she dreaded lest her intercourse with me should revive
her natural superiority; for what could she have done with
it there?
CH A PTE R I I I .
" I might have passed my life in this deplorable situation
had I not lost my father. A sudden accident deprived me
>> f my protector, my friend,-- the only being who had un-
derstood me in that peopled desert. My despair was
uncontrollable.