No More Learning

This very austerity one could recognize in his appearance.
"His cheekbones protruded in an energetic way. . . . His lips
hesitated before opening to let the words pass through, and
his chin jutted forward, edged, nearly cruel," says Lucka in
his memoir.
The elder Weininger had a sensitive mind, full of passion
and feeling, but his exterior was closed, and Lucka was led
to remark that there was something gloomy and secretive in
his Renaissance face, as if "he bore a secret in his soul. He
would often talk, but always a small smile covered the suffer-
ing within him, giving the impression that only with the great-
est exertion of will power was it forced back. " Leopold
Weininger disguised his inner life. He withdrew from the
outside world into the shy and lonely seclusion of his own
thoughts.
There was, then, an ambiguity in his nature. He was re-
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Shadows of the Past
served and inaccessible and sensitive as well. The contrast be-
tween this seclusive side of his nature and the remarkable feel-
ing he revealed in his art and in his music was sharp. To judge
from his letters and from his creations, he was as much an
argumentative artist as a sensitive craftsman. He expressed
his true nature in his art; here he opened his heart and soul.
As he grew older he turned his back to the world more and
more. His age had "gone mad," he said. After World War I
he became less and less attracted to his art, although numer-
ous requests for his work came from England and the United
States. His loss of interest seemed to be due, Lucka says, to
"a gloom which eventually penetrated his whole personality. "
In his last years he suffered from cancer of the bladder and
underwent surgery. Yet, notwithstanding his pain, he con-
stantly inquired about concerts and, according to Lucka,
listened to them even up to his last moment. He died April 1,
1922. 2
In existing literature about Otto Weininger, nothing is writ-
ten about his mother. Otto never mentioned her in his letters.
She was an ordinary woman--a good, simple woman, as her
daughter described her--but she was beautiful, if we may
judge from her photograph. She also had a gift for languages,
but in the main she was "only a housewife and mother" (Let-
ter XIV). She was overshadowed by the stronger personality
of her husband. It is not difficult to see why no such deep
understanding developed between mother and son as between
the boy and his father. For several years Adelheid Weininger
was ill with tuberculosis, from which she ultimately died. 3
Meager as this information is, it imparts a picture of Otto's
mother as a typical domestic woman who looked after her
children and tended to the cooking and housework so far as
2 According to the official records, his death was not registered in Der Israelitische
Kultusgemeinde in Vienna. In the records it is told that his body was taken
to Munich, and there is reason to believe that he had left the Jewish religion
earlier.
>> The information given comes from her daughter, from official records, and
from letters sent me by Otto Weininger's friends.
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? Shadows of the Past
11
her illness permitted her to do so. Otto never spoke directly
of her, but it is possible that she in many ways formed the
psychological basis for the type "mother" described in Sex
and Character as opposed to "prostitute. " He writes, among
other things: "A mother takes care that the children she has
borne have enough food. Look only at the dignified resolution
and the grave zeal of the good housewife and mother slaughter-
ing one chicken after another. The mother cannot stand to
throw away any food, no matter how little it be. Her object
in life is the preservation of the race. " If we keep in mind
the influence of the home upon one's pattern of behavior, it
is reasonable to conclude that the type he is describing is his
own mother.
From a psychopathological point of view, Otto's brother
Richard is the most interesting member of the family. He was
born near Vienna in 1887, passed through the regular schools,
then through a commercial school, before he became a mer-
chant. 4 The only court notice of him records that once in
1910 he was fined 10. 00 Kronen ($2. 50) for infraction of
Paragraph 459 of the Criminal Code--"action or omission
through which a danger of fire may arise. " It seems that
Richard had an unusual personality structure resembling the
introverted, inaccessible personality of his father and that of
his brother Otto. His sister describes him as follows: "He is
very handsome and very gifted, and he is wealthy. He is an
Epicurean with a feminine disposition, vain, very hard, and a
lady's man. . . . It is a principle with him not to see his fam-
ily. When he was young he caused many difficulties for my
father. He is the sort of man who will always influence every-
4 His first wife denies that he went through any university and says that he
therefore had no right to the title he is sometimes given in the official records.
During his first year as a merchant he made a small fortune. He entered the
Evangelical church in 1906 and married a Jewish woman in 1912. In Novem-
ber, 1922, he divorced his first wife and married soon afterward (March, 1923),
once again to a Jew. Rosa Weininger states that both his wives were wealthy
when he married them (Letter XI) and that he is now living in the United
States (Letter X). The official documents report him as living in England.
He has declined to make himself known.
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Shadows of the Past
body. He has a great sense of beauty. He would walk over
your dead body, but he may also give shelter to a beggar when
he is in a good mood and when he is admired. He definitely
is not an ordinary man" (Letter X). And further: "He will
show goodness when least expected. He is hungry for sensa-
tion, audience, applause. " (Letter XI. )
As we shall see later, there is an amazing resemblance be-
tween Otto and Richard in their seeking after sensation, in
their egocentricity and craving for applause, in their feminine
vanity, and in their looks.
As to Otto Weininger's sisters, Mathilde and Karoline, they
both became Christians. The latter was the more gifted, espe-
cially in languages. A description of her character when she
was sixteen years old has been found in a letter from Leopold
Weininger: "I have never seen Karoline moved or touched,
not to mention shocked. When I have scolded her for this
over and over again, as well as for her complete lack of any
sense of gratitude, she has tried to pretend an indifference
which contradicts her inner feeling. I can add no word to
alleviate this sentence. I suppose she cannot help it. God
probably created her that way. "
Up to this time practically nothing has been known of
Otto's early youth. He himself never mentioned his childhood.
Yet the information in our possession gives us a glimpse or
two into the home where Otto grew up.
Documents in the Israelitische Kultusgemeinde of Vienna
indicate that Otto was born in Vienna on April 3, 1880, after
a normal pregnancy and without artificial help. His Hebrew
name was Schlomoh. The date of his circumcision and the
name of the physician performing it are also recorded. Very
early he showed a rare mental maturity, and at the age of four-
teen months he spoke quite distinctly.
In his early years he was apparently very much influenced
by his father. And another factor entered--his home environ-
ment, which seems to have affected him deeply, however un-
conscious he may have been of its force at the start of his life.
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? Shadows of the Past 13
Undoubtedly serious conflicts took place between his parents.
This fact is brought out by the following remarks of his sister:
"The married life of my parents was not peaceful. That was
due to my father's strong personality, his sharp criticism, and
his great demands upon his family. We children let Mother
spoil us, we confided in her, but to us Father was the supreme
judge.
"Today, as a mature woman, I judge my parents' life in
quite a different light. I think that because of her many chil-
dren, because of her wonderful but difficult husband, my
mother had a hard task which she could manage only with the
greatest mental and physical difficulty. She was ill and suffered
for years from bronchio-catarrh. I am certain of one thing: with
an average, ordinary husband, my mother would undoubtedly
have been a happy wife. . . . He [my father] loved her dearly
as a woman, and she loved him, only him. But there were
storms in their life which darkened our youth" (Letter XXIII).
Undoubtedly the disharmony between his parents impressed
young Otto deeply. Having a highly gifted but severe father
and a mother of quite ordinary talents affected his sensitive
mind. The close mental relationship with his father naturally
led Otto to side with him in making demands on his mother.
Even more. Apparently Otto tried to identify himself with his
father and developed hostility--unconscious though it may
have been--toward his mother. There can be little doubt that
his father's severity to his mother was instrumental in forming
the devastating view of women Otto later held.
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? Towards the
Future
During the years 1890-1898 Otto Weininger attended
elementary and secondary school, from which he was
graduated on July 14,1898. He was a good student, with keen
curiosity and an avid thirst for knowledge. Otto was familiar
with philosophical and historical literature utterly unknown
to his comrades, and he was the best of his class in history and
languages. His gift for the latter had developed to such an ex-
tent that at the age of eighteen he knew Latin and Greek, spoke
French, English, and Italian well, and was fluent in Spanish
and Norwegian. At this time, perhaps as a result of his father's
influence, he took no particular interest in science or mathe-
matics. His grades were excellent, except for those in deport-
ment, which were poor because he would not bow to the
ordinary school routine. He always did his school work in his
own way, rarely in the way his teachers wished. He ignored
them and busied himself with his own books or engaged in
writing on his own account. Since he was occupied with his
private affairs, he certainly was not talkative as a student,
although it is claimed that he took an eager part in discussions.
The picture we can thus form of the young Otto is that of
a boy far ahead of his schoolmates in knowledge; he was self-
confident, independent. His desire for, and accumulation of,
learning made him critical of his teachers, and he was able to
put embarrassing questions to them. He followed his own
path.
This feeling of independence was partly at least a product
of his upbringing and of the close relationship between the
boy and his father. Their mutual ties were strong, and Otto
continued to be much more attached to his father than to
his mother. His friend Lucka said in Der Tag: "I think Otto
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? Towards the Future 15
received a greater heritage from his father. He loved him more
than he did his mother; the deep, dark inner life was common
to them. "
His son's resemblance to him also led Leopold Weininger
to take a keener interest in Otto's upbringing. He watched the
development of the boy and the young man carefully. He
noted and encouraged his son's talent for acquiring knowl-
edge. The father, with his philological interests, fostered Otto's
special ability at learning languages. He also shared his musical
experiences with all his children, but especially with his favor-
ite, Otto. Very early he had introduced his son to concerts
and had familiarized him with Wagner and Mozart. When
Otto was six his father took him to hear Der Freischiitz, and
at the age of eight he heard Die Meistersinger for the first time
(Letter VI). Otto may almost be said to have "inherited" his
romantic love for Wagner's music. So much was this true that
Wagner became the most beloved composer in the last years
of the young man's life. The influence of the father upon the
son was significantly strong.
This relationship affected the boy's education and may be
one reason why he tended to live in the realm of his books
and his own thoughts. As his father said: "There was one thing
Otto would never share with anyone--his books. He lived in
complete isolation with them. " 1 We might well expect to
find Otto later searching, as he did, through books for some-
thing of which he was not yet aware. We may assume that
even as a young boy his mental preoccupation was such that
he had no time for playing games with his comrades.
He was bound to feel a sentimental affection for his father.
Mingled with this affection was fear (which was shared by
the other children) because of his father's uncompromising
and rigid principles. "In his home and with his numerous chil-
dren, he (Leopold Weininger) maintained severe discipline. " 2
The family conflict which had affected the child continued
1 Ferdinand Probst, Der Fall Otto Weininger (in Grenzfragen des Nerven-
und Seelenlebens, Wiesbaden, 1904), p. 5. Later cited in the text as Der Fall.
* Paul Biro, Die Sittlichkeitsmetapnysik Otto Weiningers (Vienna, 1927).
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? Towards the Future
to influence the proud, shy boy. The patriarchal father stood
with authority above his wife and children. Since Otto was
sensitive, he could not have been unaware of his mother's suf-
fering, and she, for her part, must have sought sympathy from
the children. Thus, while he was seeking to identify himself
with his father, he very well may also have identified himself
with the suffering of his mother--an identification he repudi-
ated throughout his life.
To this family combination Otto found it difficult to adapt
himself. Even if he sought identification with his father, he
also to some extent resented and feared paternal authority.
Even if he sympathized with his mother, he also resented her.
His situation (Oedipus situation) in the home seemed complex.
Usually a child feels such contradictory feelings of love and
hate toward one or the other parent, and while he is young the
contrary feelings may simply exist side by side for the time
being. Yet as the ego of the boy gradually strengthens, the op-
posite strivings increase to the point of conflict. The boy then
begins to understand that against his identification-love for his
father and his love for his mother is pitted resentment of his
father (positive Oedipus complex). In Otto's case, however,
the home environment fostered identification-love for his
father and strong resentment of his mother, and thus he ap-
parently had a negative Oedipus complex. The conscious or
unconscious hatred of his mother, which seems to have domi-
nated his infantile sexual period, persisted in his boyhood and
manhood. He did not succeed in overcoming his infantile
sexual drives, which were later detrimental to him.
Homeless in his own home, Otto sought even more the refuge
of his books. His highly individual talents and his developing
personality also made Otto go his own way. Intellectually far
more mature than his companions, he naturally found it diffi-
cult to adapt himself to his surroundings and his schoolmates.
Even if his talents and his knowledge acted as incentive and
inspiration, he must also have felt them as a burden and a
hindrance to his happiness at school. His awakening ego made
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? Towards the Future 17
it hard for him to adapt himself socially, his inner strivings
virtually compelling queer behavior. At school he showed a
haughty nature and an addiction to fantasy. But there was
something more. There was a definite aim in his behavior,
however unconscious he may have been of it originally. His
actions showed clearly that he never intended to subordinate
himself to the laws ruling others. Even in early youth he placed
himself outside the affairs of ordinary human beings and ordi-
nary society--a tendency he later followed to an extreme.
Behind his every act and expression there was determination.
The force of his will was powerful, and he seemed ready to
push his way to the uttermost limits in order to reach his goal.
Yet it was the exercise of the will rather than the goal itself;
that was important. Otto was moved more by the wish to
prove that he could go to extremes than by a real desire to go
there. He wanted to demonstrate the forcefulness of his will
more than he wanted to perpetrate his will in action. This
motive showed plainly in examples of his self-assertion. One
such instance occurred when his secondary schooling was fin-
ished. His father then issued a patriarchal command that he
enter the Consular Academy to study languages. Otto flatly
refused. Instead, he entered the University of Vienna, thus
causing a rift between his father and himself.
When we try to reconstruct Weininger's original personality,
we note that his extraordinary environment tended to make
of him a lonely and spoiled boy. His isolation was nourished,
to a large extent, by his marked intellectual gifts, which gave
him an advantage over his companions. His superiof intellect
caused him to stay away from his schoolmates, and his isola-
tion increased, growing more and more pronounced. In him,
too, there was rooted a sense of his own superiority. A strong
(primary) narcissism was a basic element in his personality
that made itself felt throughout his life. In his teens his talents
and individuality caused him to resist the authority of the
school and carried him on to ever stronger self-assertion and
self-confidence. Even as a boy he rejected, as far as he could,
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? 18 Towards the Future
any outside help or control. He did not want others meddling
in his affairs; he considered interference a threat to his person-
ality, and therefore protected himself against it. Throughout
his life he stood ready to defend himself with speed and vigor.
Yet the very necessity for this defense showed how vulnerable
he was, though he hid his sensitiveness behind a calm, self-
assured face. He always reacted violently when he felt that his
dignity had been wounded. "What he considered right and just
he defended with courage far beyond his years" (Taschenbuch,
p. 13).
His self-esteem was great beyond all proportion because it
was rooted in a narcissistic fixation, which was partially caused
by his environment. When he was hurt, he overcompensated
for his injury by taking on a still higher opinion of himself.
He not only clung to his narcissism; he also increased it through
the years as he built his self-admiration to dizzying heights and
expressed it in grotesque actions and the choice of unobtain-
able goals. We may safely surmise that this type of narcissism
was one point of departure for the development of the ascetic-
masochistic attitude that was ultimately fatal to him.
Several incidents in his later years showed clearly that
this vulnerability and defensiveness persisted. Toward the end
of 1900 or early in 1901 he accused a man of playing a fool
trick on him and challenged him to a duel. That he himself
did not know how to use a sword and that his opponent was
his physical superior seemed matters of minor importance
to Otto Weininger. Despite these handicaps he wounded his
adversary in the duel while he himself did not suffer a scratch
(Taschenbuch, p. 13). Another event that showed Otto's met-
tle took place in 1902, probably in the spring. He was asked
to be a collaborator in a new literary enterprise. Since he was
a financially poor student, this job meant economic independ-
ence to him. But when a conflict arose between the editor and
a friend of Weininger's, he was forced either to break with the
friend or to sacrifice his job. He had the moral courage to de-
clare his agreement with the friend, and he freely told the
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? ADELHEID WEININGER
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? Towards the Future 19
t
publisher so. He unhesitatingly sacrificed his job and its fixed
income.
His pronounced critical attitude toward every type of author-
ity, expressed in his strong opposition to the school, probably
had its roots in his revolt against the environment of his child-
hood. His father's attitude here was of major importance. Re-
sistance to authority grew from the mingled affection and fear
Otto felt for the father who, as Otto's sister said, "knew no
moderation in his severity and criticism. He was loved and
feared by us all. . . . If we ever told a lie, he would punish us
at once. His demands upon us were enormous; if we did not
live up to them, he was mortally wounded" (Letter XIV).
Sensitiveness, self-assertion, and isolation from his environ-
ment were bound together in the arrogant and rebellious boy.
He was ever being driven further into his isolation. When he
was twenty he was to be talking to a conference of psychologists
on introspection as the most important method of exploring
the mind! Throughout his later life he showed a fear of re-
vealing himself. The persistent tendency to conceal his inner
life must have been firmly rooted in his boyhood and must
have come from his wish to cover up his sexual urges.
In a letter written some years later, he wrote to a friend:
"Apart from the life you know, I lead two or three other
lives of which you know nothing. I tell you this, and I must
beg of you never to try to find them out. " The statement re-
veals what must have been a characteristic tendency in Otto
Weininger when he was still a schoolboy. He felt division be-
tween his external activity, which brought him in contact with
the outer world, and his inner activity. His "two or three other
lives"--that is, the other way of life for Otto--were, and can
be regarded as, nothing but his secret existence deep in his
mind. There seems to have been developed in the boy a pro-
nounced contradiction in his mental life. On the surface he
was apparently in good rapport with the external world. In
the deeper layer of his mind he led his hidden life. There
was the world of his surging desires and sexual cravings, his
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Towards the Future
dreams, his hopes, and his fantasies. That world was, as we
shall see later, both sacred and profane, good and evil, the
home of God and Devil. Between this secret realm and the
external world there was opposition that led to great conflict.
Within him romantic feelings must have waned with a
more or less realistic attitude even when he was quite young.
He enjoyed nature in the most romantic fashion. Once in the
middle of a winter some years later he rented a garden room
in Gersthof, a suburb of Vienna, so that he might be near
the woods. 8 Indeed his love of nature seems to have been
strong, discriminating, and very comprehensive; the most
superb thing for him was a sunset; water in all its shapes had
strong meaning--the spring was birth, the river the Apol-
lonian principle, the ocean the Dionysian principle (U. L. D. ,
p. 9). His view not only was romantic but also was a fusion
of rational analysis with emotion.
A contradiction seems to have appeared in him as early as
his days in secondary school: a desire for life, a longing for
reality, which contrasted with his isolation from that same
reality--a separation which was later to develop so far that
he became afraid of life. In "Verdamnis" (translated in full at
the end of the Appendix), he said: "The artist always loves
himself; the philosopher hates himself. A glorious love is cre-
ated in the artist by the least sign of love and respect, while
the philosopher as such is never loved. But when one is mis-
judged and still loved, then one becomes hard, hard until one
is compassionate with oneself! . . .
"That is the worst: not being able to love when one is loved
and knows one is loved, with hatred toward that bitter feeling
of a desire to love deep down in the heart. This petrifaction,
this barrenness! An olive tree on the hardest granite! My soul
cannot free itself and enter into that of another who loves
me! "
He seems to have sought to establish relations with others,
1 Emfl Lucka, Otto Wefninger: Der Mensch und sein Werk (Vienna, 1905),
p. 6. Cited later in the text as Lucka.
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? Towards the Future
21
to join with the crowd. Yet to think that he enjoyed being in
the crowd would be a mistake. When he was part of a group,
he was with the others only superficially. He wanted to belong
to them, to share with them in youthful activity, so strong
was his longing for life. And yet he was freezing within, alone.
His contradictory feelings come through to expression in a
poem he wrote a little later, probably after one of his night
wanderings. His sister was kind enough to give me the poem,
which has never before been published.
SCHAUDER
Allmahlich kehr ich heim an diese Statte
Mit miiden Sinnen, schlaff und ohne Kraft;
Wie jeder andere ist der Tag verronnen.
Der Mond ist da, soil trosten fiir die Sonnen.
Des Winters schweigend' mitleidslose Kalte,
Der Himmel starr in seinem Leichentuch:
Es schneit in meinem Herzen, seine Sehnsucht
Erfrieret langsam vor des Lebens Zucht.
SHIVERING
Slowly my steps turn homeward to this place,
With weary soul, abject and powerless.
Like any other this day's course has run;
The moon is there, as solace for the sun.
Wrapped in the winter's mute, unpitying cold,
The sky is stiff and stark within its shroud.
With deeper winter, snow falls in my heart,
Where longing freezes ere life's growth can start.
His earnest desire for life evolves into a hatred and fear of it.
The stronger the longing, the stronger the fear.
The division within him appeared in many contradictory
and irreconcilable attitudes in the form of ambivalency (the
coexistence of antithetic and contrary tendencies) and split-
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Towards the Future
ting. This affective ambivalency became gradually apparent in
his attitudes toward women and toward Jews.
Ambivalency he had deeply ingrained in him. He came to
recognize his own worth consciously, but at the same time
he was struggling to conquer his sexual desires, his "lower
ego. " When in the world of his imagination, he was secure
in self-satisfaction. When faced with the world of reality, he
lost his sense of security and his confidence in himself. Because
reality thus threatened at any moment to destroy his. morbid
self-esteem, he was under a tightening strain. Hence, he clung
more firmly than ever to self-exaltation and transformed it into
a self-idolatry which was, of course, rooted in his narcissism.
Otto exaggerated his own imaginary strength and virility, and,
therefore, he felt compelled to exhibit his talents passionately.
His desire for attention was imperative, and in various activities
he gave symbolic expression to his urge.
Thus his self-assertion changed as external circumstances
varied, but it was always present and it grew stronger as his
life progressed. His letters from the summer of 1902 were
typical expressions of the strengthened feeling. "Today," he
wrote, "I have discovered in myself a special musical imag-
ination . .