_ I can't trust more to a Cork than to my Feet; if you have a Mind
to swim, I had rather be a Spectator than an Actor.
to swim, I had rather be a Spectator than an Actor.
Erasmus
_ Very well, let it be so; but I say let the Bowls be alike.
_Adol. _ They are as like as two Peas. Take which you please, it's all
one to me.
_Ber. _ Bowl away.
_Adol. _ Hey-day, you whirl your Bowl as if your Arm was a Sling.
_Ber. _ You have bit your Lip, and whirled your Bowl long enough: Come
bowl away. A strong Bowl indeed, but I am best.
_Adol. _ If it had not been for that mischievous Bit of a Brick-bat
there, that lay in my Way, I had beat you off.
_Ber. _ Stand fair.
_Adol. _ I won't cheat: I intend to beat you, by Art, and not to cheat
ye, since we contend for the Prize of Honour: Rub, rub.
_Ber. _ A great Cast in Troth.
_Adol. _ Nay, don't laugh before you've won. We are equal yet.
_Ber. _ This is who shall: He that first hits the Jack is up. I have beat
you, sing.
_Adol. _ Stay, you should have said how many you'd make up, for my Hand
is not come in yet.
_Ber. _ Judgment, Gentlemen.
_Arbitr. _ 3.
_Adol. _ Very well.
_Ber. _ Well, what do you say now? Are you beat or no?
_Adol. _ You have had better Luck than I, but yet I won't vail to you, as
to Strength and Art; I'll stand to what the Company says.
_Arb. _ The _German_ has beat, and the Victory is the more glorious, that
he has beat so good a Gamester.
_Ber. _ Now Cock, crow.
_Adol. _ I am hoarse.
_Ber. _ That's no new Thing to Cocks; but if you can't crow like an old
Cock, crow like a Cockeril.
_Adol. _ Let _Germany_ flourish thrice.
_Ber. _ You ought to have said so thrice. I am a-dry; let us drink
somewhere, I'll make an end of the Song there.
_Adol. _ I won't stand upon that, if the Company likes it.
_Arb. _ That will be the best, the Cock will crow clearer when his Throat
is gargled.
* * * * *
_3. The Play of striking a Ball through an Iron Ring.
GASPAR, ERASMUS.
Gas. _ Come, let's begin, _Marcolphus_ shall come in, in the Losers
Place.
_Er. _ But what shall we play for?
_Gas. _ He that is beat shall make and repeat _extempore_ a Distich, in
Praise of him that beat him.
_Er. _ With all my Heart.
_Gas. _ Shall we toss up who shall go first?
_Er. _ Do you go first if you will, I had rather go last.
_Gas. _ You have the better of me, because you know the Ground.
_Er. _ You're upon your own Ground.
_Gas. _ Indeed I am better acquainted with the Ground, than I am with my
Books; but that's but a small Commendation.
_Er. _ You that are so good a Gamester ought to give me Odds.
_Gas. _ Nay, you should rather give me Odds; but there's no great Honour
in getting a Victory, when Odds is taken: He only can properly be said
to get the Game, that gets it by his own Art; we are as well match'd as
can be.
_Er. _ Yours is a better Ball than mine.
_Gas. _ And yours is beyond me.
_Er. _ Play fair, without cheating and cozening.
_Gas. _ You shall say you have had to do with a fair Gamester.
_Er. _ But I would first know the Orders of the Bowling-alley.
_Gas. _ We make 4 up; whoever bowls beyond this Line it goes for nothing;
if you can go beyond those other Bounds, do it fairly and welcome:
Whoever hits a Bowl out of his Place loses his Cast.
_Er. _ I understand these Things.
_Gas. _ I have shut you out.
_Er. _ But I'll give you a Remove.
_Gas. _ If you do that I'll give you the Game.
_Er. _ Will you upon your Word?
_Gas. _ Yes, upon my Word: You have no other Way for it but to bank your
Bowl so as to make it rebound on mine.
_Er. _ I'll try: Well, what say you now Friend? Are not you beaten away?
(Have I not struck you away? )
_Gas. _ I am, I confess it; I wish you were but as wise as you are lucky;
you can scarce do so once in a hundred Times.
_Er. _ I'll lay you, if you will, that I do it once in three Times. But
come pay me what I have won.
_Gas. _ What's that?
_Er. _ Why, a Distich.
_Gas. _ Well, I'll pay it now.
_Er. _ And an extempore one too. Why do you bite your Nails?
_Gas. _ I have it.
_Er. _ Recite it out.
_Gas. _ As loud as you will.
_Young Standers-by, dap ye the Conqueror brave,
Who me has beat, is the more learned Knave_.
Han't you a Distich now?
_Er. _ I have, and I'll give you as good as you bring.
* * * * *
4. _Leaping. _
VINCENT, LAURENCE.
_Vi. _ Have you a Mind to jump with me?
_Lau. _ That Play is not good presently after Dinner.
_Vi. _ Why so?
_Lau. _ Because that a Fulness of Belly makes the Body heavy.
_Vi. _ Not very much to those that live upon Scholars Commons, for these
oftentimes are ready for a Supper before they have done Dinner.
_Lau. _ What Sort of leaping is it that you like best?
_Vi. _ Let us first begin with that which is the plainest, as that of
Grasshoppers; or Leap-frog, if you like that better, both Feet at once,
and close to one another; and when we have play'd enough at this, then
we'll try other Sorts.
_Lau. _ I'll play at any Sort, where there is no Danger of breaking ones
Legs; I have no Mind to make Work for the Surgeon.
_Vi. _ What if we should play at hopping?
_Lau. _ That the Ghosts play, I am not for that.
_Vi. _ It's the cleverest Way to leap with a Pole.
_Lau. _ Running is a more noble Exercise; for _Æneas_ in _Virgil_
proposed this Exercise.
_Vi. _ Very true, and he also propos'd the righting with Whirly-bats too,
and I don't like that Sport.
_Lau. _ Mark the Course, let this be the Starting-place, and yonder Oak
the Goal.
_Vi. _ I wish _Æneas_ was here, that he might propose what should be the
Conqueror's Prize.
_Lau. _ Glory is a Reward sufficient for Victory.
_Vi. _ You should rather give a Reward to him that is beat, to comfort
him.
_Lau. _ Then let the Victor's Reward be to go into the Town crowned with
a Bur.
_Vi. _ Well, 'tis done, provided you'll go before playing upon a Pipe.
_Lau. _ It is very hot.
_Vi. _ That is not strange when it is Midsummer.
_Lau. _ Swimming is better.
_Vi. _ I don't love to live like a Frog, I am a Land Animal, not an
amphibious one.
_Lau. _ But in old Time this was look'd upon to be one of the most noble
Exercises.
_Vi. _ Nay, and a very useful one too.
_Lau. _ For What?
_Vi. _ If Men are forc'd to fly in Battel, they are in the best Condition
that can run and swim best.
_Lau. _ The Art you speak of is not to be set light by; it is as
Praise-worthy sometimes to run away nimbly as it is to fight stoutly.
_Vi. _ I can't swim at all, and it is dangerous to converse with an
unaccustomed Element.
_Lau. _ You ought to learn then, for no Body was born an Artist.
_Vi. _ But I have heard of a great many of these Artists that have swum
in, but never swam out again.
_Lau. _ First try with Corks.
_Vi.
_ I can't trust more to a Cork than to my Feet; if you have a Mind
to swim, I had rather be a Spectator than an Actor.
_The CHILD'S PIETY. _
The ARGUMENT.
_This Discourse furnishes a childish Mind with pious
Instructions of Religion, in what it consists. What is to
be done in the Morning in Bed, at getting up, at Home, at
School, before Meat, after Meat, before going to Sleep.
Of beginning the Day, of praying, of behaving themselves
studiously at School, Thriftiness of Time: Age flies.
What is to be done after Supper. How we ought to sleep.
Of Behaviour at holy Worship. All Things to be applied to
ourselves. The Meditation of a pious Soul at Church. What
Preachers are chiefly to be heard. Fasting is prejudicial
to Children. Confession is to be made to Christ. The
Society of wicked Persons is to be avoided. Of the
prudent chusing a Way of Living. Holy Orders and
Matrimony are not to be entred into before the Age of
Twenty-two. What Poets are fit to be read, and how. _
ERASMUS, GASPAR.
_ERASMUS. _ Whence came you from? Out of some Alehouse?
_Ga. _ No, indeed.
_Er. _ What from a Bowling Green?
_Ga. _ No, nor from thence neither.
_Er. _ What from the Tavern then?
_Ga. _ No.
_Er. _ Well, since I can't guess, tell me.
_Ga. _ From St. _Mary's_ Church.
_Er. _ What Business had you there?
_Ga. _ I saluted some Persons.
_Er. _ Who?
_Ga. _ Christ, and some of the Saints.
_Er. _ You have more Religion than is common to one of your Age.
_Ga. _ Religion is becoming to every Age.
_Er. _ If I had a Mind to be religious, I'd become a Monk.
_Ga. _ And so would I too, if a Monk's Hood carried in it as much Piety
as it does Warmth.
_Er. _ There is an old Saying, a young Saint and an old Devil.
_Ga. _ But I believe that old Saying came from old Satan: I can hardly
think an old Man to be truly religious, that has not been so in his
young Days. Nothing is learn'd to greater Advantage, than what we learn
in our youngest Years.
_Er. _ What is that which is call'd Religion?
_Ga. _ It is the pure Worship of God, and Observation of his
Commandments.
_Er. _ What are they?
_Ga. _ It is too long to relate all; but I'll tell you in short, it
consists in four Things.
_Er. _ What are they?
_Ga. _ In the first Place, that we have a true and pious Apprehension of
God himself, and the Holy Scriptures; and that we not only stand in Awe
of him as a Lord, but that we love him with all our Heart, as a most
beneficent Father. 2. That we take the greatest Care to keep ourselves
blameless; that is, that we do no Injury to any one. 3. That we exercise
Charity, _i. e. _ to deserve well of all Persons (as much as in us lyes).
4. That we practise Patience, _i. e. _ to bear patiently Injuries that are
offered us, when we can't prevent them, not revenging them, nor
requiting Evil for Evil.
_Er. _ You hold forth finely; but do you practise what you teach?
_Ga. _ I endeavour it manfully.
_Er. _ How can you do it like a Man, when you are but a Boy?
_Ga. _ I meditate according to my Ability, and call myself to an Account
every Day; and correct myself for what I have done amiss: That was
unhandsomely done this saucily said, this was uncautiously acted; in
that it were better to have held my Peace, that was neglected.
_Er. _ When do you come to this Reckoning?
_Ga. _ Most commonly at Night; or at any Time that I am most at Leisure.
_Er. _ But tell me, in what Studies do you spend the Day?
_Ga. _ I will hide nothing from so intimate a Companion: In the Morning,
as soon as I am awake, (and that is commonly about six a Clock, or
sometimes at five) I sign myself with my Finger in the Forehead and
Breast with the Sign of the Cross.
_Er. _ What then?
_Ga. _ I begin the Day in the Name of the Father, Son, and holy Spirit.
_Er. _ Indeed that is very piously done.
_Ga. _ By and by I put up a short Ejaculation to Christ.
_Er. _ What dost thou say to him?
_Ga. _ I give him Thanks that he has been pleased to bless me that Night;
and I pray him that he would in like Manner prosper me the whole of that
Day, so as may be for his Glory, and my Soul's Good; and that he who is
the true Light that never sets, the eternal Sun, that enlivens,
nourishes and exhilarates all Things, would vouchsafe to enlighten my
Soul, that I mayn't fall into Sin; but by his Guidance, may attain
everlasting Life.
_Er. _ A very good Beginning of the Day indeed.
_Ga. _ And then having bid my Parents good Morrow, to whom next to God, I
owe the greatest Reverence, when it is Time I go to School; but so that
I may pass by some Church, if I can conveniently.
_Er. _ What do you do there?
_Ga. _ I salute Jesus again in three Words, and all the Saints, either
Men or Women; but the Virgin _Mary_ by Name, and especially that I
account most peculiarly my own.
_Er. _ Indeed you seem to have read that Sentence of _Cato, Saluta
libenter_, to good Purpose; was it not enough to have saluted Christ in
the Morning, without saluting him again presently? Are you not afraid
lest you should be troublesome by your over Officiousness?
_Ga. _ Christ loves to be often called upon.
_Er. _ But it seems to be ridiculous to speak to one you don't see.
_Ga. _ No more do I see that Part of me that speaks to him.
_Er. _ What Part is that?
_Ga. _ My Mind.
_Er. _ But it seems to be Labour lost, to salute one that does not salute
you again.
_Ga. _ He frequently salutes again by his secret Inspiration; and he
answers sufficiently that gives what is ask'd of him.
_Er. _ What is it you ask of him? For I perceive your Salutations are
petitionary, like those of Beggars.
_Ga. _ Indeed you are very right; for I pray that he, who, when he was a
Boy of about twelve Years of Age, sitting in the Temple, taught the
Doctors themselves, and to whom the heavenly Father, by a Voice from
Heaven, gave Authority to teach Mankind, saying, _This is my beloved
Son, in whom I am well pleased, hear ye him_; and who is the eternal
Wisdom of the most high Father, would vouchsafe to enlighten my
Understanding, to receive wholesome Learning, that I may use it to his
Glory.
_Er. _ Who are those Saints that you call peculiarly yours?
_Ga. _ Of the Apostles, St. _Paul_; of the Martyrs, St. _Cyprian_; of the
Doctors, St. _Jerome_; of the Virgins, St. _Agnes_.
_Er. _ How came these to be yours, more than the rest. Was it by Choice
or by Chance?
_Ga. _ They fell to me by Lot.
_Er. _ But you only salute them I suppose; do you beg any Thing of them?
_Ga. _ I pray, that by their Suffrages they would recommend me to
Christ, and procure that by his Assistance it may in Time come to pass
that I be made one of their Company.
_Er. _ Indeed what you ask for is no ordinary Thing: But what do you do
then?
_Ga. _ I go to School, and do what is to be done there with my utmost
Endeavour; I so implore Christ's Assistance, as if my Study without it
would signify nothing; and I study as if he offered no Help but to him
that labours industriously; and I do my utmost not to deserve to be
beaten, nor to offend my Master either in Word or Deed, nor any of my
Companions.
_Er. _ You are a good Boy to mind these Things.
_Ga. _ When School is done I make haste Home, and if I can I take a
Church in my Way, and in three Words, I salute Jesus again; and I pay my
Respects to my Parents; and if I have any Time, I repeat, either by
myself, or with one of my School-fellows, what was dictated in School.
_Er. _ Indeed you are a very good Husband of Time.
_Ga. _ No wonder I am of that, which is the most precious Thing in the
World, and when past is irrecoverable.
_Er. _ And _Hesiod_ teaches, that good Husbandry ought to be in the
Middle, it is too soon in the Beginning, and too late in the End.
_Ga. _ _Hesiod_ spoke right enough concerning Wine, but of Time no good
Husbandry is unseasonable. If you let a Hogshead of Wine alone it won't
empty itself; but Time is always a flying, sleeping or waking.
_Er. _ I confess so, but what do you do after that?
_Ga. _ When my Parents sit down to Dinner I say Grace, and then wait at
Table till I am bid to take my own Dinner; and having returned Thanks,
if I have any Time left I divert myself with my Companions with some
lawful Recreation till the Time comes to go to School again.
_Er. _ Do you salute Jesus again?
_Ga. _ Yes, if I have an Opportunity; but if it so happen that I have not
an Opportunity, or it be not seasonable, as I pass by the Church I
salute him mentally; and then I do what is to be done at School with all
my Might; and when I go Home again I do what I did before Dinner: After
Supper I divert myself with some pleasant Stories; and afterwards
bidding my Parents and the Family good Night, I go to Bed betimes, and
there kneeling down by the Bedside, as I have said, I say over those
Things I have been learning that Day at School; if I have committed any
great Fault, I implore Christ's Clemency, that he would pardon me, and I
promise Amendment: and if I have committed no Fault, I thank him for his
Goodness in preserving me from all Vice, and then I recommend myself to
him with all my Soul, that he would preserve me from the Attempts of my
evil Genius and filthy Dreams. When this is done, and I am got into Bed,
I cross my Forehead and Breast, and compose myself to Rest.
_Er. _ In what Posture do you compose yourself?
_Ga. _ I don't lye upon my Face or my Back, but first leaning upon my
Right-Side, I fold my Arms a-cross, so that they may defend my Breast,
as it were with the Figure of a Cross, with my Right-hand upon my Left
Shoulder, and my Left upon my Right, and so I sleep sweetly, either till
I awake of myself, or am called up.
_Er. _ You are a little Saint that can do thus.
_Ga. _ You are a little Fool for saying so.
_Er. _ I praise your Method, and I would I could practise it.
_Ga. _ Give your Mind to it and you will do it, for when once you have
accustom'd yourself to it for a few Months, these Things will be
pleasant, and become natural.
_Er. _ But I want to hear concerning divine Service.
_Ga. _ I don't neglect that, especially upon holy Days.
_Er. _ How do you manage yourself on holy Days?
_Ga. _ In the first place I examine myself if my Mind be Polluted by any
Stain of Sin.
_Adol. _ They are as like as two Peas. Take which you please, it's all
one to me.
_Ber. _ Bowl away.
_Adol. _ Hey-day, you whirl your Bowl as if your Arm was a Sling.
_Ber. _ You have bit your Lip, and whirled your Bowl long enough: Come
bowl away. A strong Bowl indeed, but I am best.
_Adol. _ If it had not been for that mischievous Bit of a Brick-bat
there, that lay in my Way, I had beat you off.
_Ber. _ Stand fair.
_Adol. _ I won't cheat: I intend to beat you, by Art, and not to cheat
ye, since we contend for the Prize of Honour: Rub, rub.
_Ber. _ A great Cast in Troth.
_Adol. _ Nay, don't laugh before you've won. We are equal yet.
_Ber. _ This is who shall: He that first hits the Jack is up. I have beat
you, sing.
_Adol. _ Stay, you should have said how many you'd make up, for my Hand
is not come in yet.
_Ber. _ Judgment, Gentlemen.
_Arbitr. _ 3.
_Adol. _ Very well.
_Ber. _ Well, what do you say now? Are you beat or no?
_Adol. _ You have had better Luck than I, but yet I won't vail to you, as
to Strength and Art; I'll stand to what the Company says.
_Arb. _ The _German_ has beat, and the Victory is the more glorious, that
he has beat so good a Gamester.
_Ber. _ Now Cock, crow.
_Adol. _ I am hoarse.
_Ber. _ That's no new Thing to Cocks; but if you can't crow like an old
Cock, crow like a Cockeril.
_Adol. _ Let _Germany_ flourish thrice.
_Ber. _ You ought to have said so thrice. I am a-dry; let us drink
somewhere, I'll make an end of the Song there.
_Adol. _ I won't stand upon that, if the Company likes it.
_Arb. _ That will be the best, the Cock will crow clearer when his Throat
is gargled.
* * * * *
_3. The Play of striking a Ball through an Iron Ring.
GASPAR, ERASMUS.
Gas. _ Come, let's begin, _Marcolphus_ shall come in, in the Losers
Place.
_Er. _ But what shall we play for?
_Gas. _ He that is beat shall make and repeat _extempore_ a Distich, in
Praise of him that beat him.
_Er. _ With all my Heart.
_Gas. _ Shall we toss up who shall go first?
_Er. _ Do you go first if you will, I had rather go last.
_Gas. _ You have the better of me, because you know the Ground.
_Er. _ You're upon your own Ground.
_Gas. _ Indeed I am better acquainted with the Ground, than I am with my
Books; but that's but a small Commendation.
_Er. _ You that are so good a Gamester ought to give me Odds.
_Gas. _ Nay, you should rather give me Odds; but there's no great Honour
in getting a Victory, when Odds is taken: He only can properly be said
to get the Game, that gets it by his own Art; we are as well match'd as
can be.
_Er. _ Yours is a better Ball than mine.
_Gas. _ And yours is beyond me.
_Er. _ Play fair, without cheating and cozening.
_Gas. _ You shall say you have had to do with a fair Gamester.
_Er. _ But I would first know the Orders of the Bowling-alley.
_Gas. _ We make 4 up; whoever bowls beyond this Line it goes for nothing;
if you can go beyond those other Bounds, do it fairly and welcome:
Whoever hits a Bowl out of his Place loses his Cast.
_Er. _ I understand these Things.
_Gas. _ I have shut you out.
_Er. _ But I'll give you a Remove.
_Gas. _ If you do that I'll give you the Game.
_Er. _ Will you upon your Word?
_Gas. _ Yes, upon my Word: You have no other Way for it but to bank your
Bowl so as to make it rebound on mine.
_Er. _ I'll try: Well, what say you now Friend? Are not you beaten away?
(Have I not struck you away? )
_Gas. _ I am, I confess it; I wish you were but as wise as you are lucky;
you can scarce do so once in a hundred Times.
_Er. _ I'll lay you, if you will, that I do it once in three Times. But
come pay me what I have won.
_Gas. _ What's that?
_Er. _ Why, a Distich.
_Gas. _ Well, I'll pay it now.
_Er. _ And an extempore one too. Why do you bite your Nails?
_Gas. _ I have it.
_Er. _ Recite it out.
_Gas. _ As loud as you will.
_Young Standers-by, dap ye the Conqueror brave,
Who me has beat, is the more learned Knave_.
Han't you a Distich now?
_Er. _ I have, and I'll give you as good as you bring.
* * * * *
4. _Leaping. _
VINCENT, LAURENCE.
_Vi. _ Have you a Mind to jump with me?
_Lau. _ That Play is not good presently after Dinner.
_Vi. _ Why so?
_Lau. _ Because that a Fulness of Belly makes the Body heavy.
_Vi. _ Not very much to those that live upon Scholars Commons, for these
oftentimes are ready for a Supper before they have done Dinner.
_Lau. _ What Sort of leaping is it that you like best?
_Vi. _ Let us first begin with that which is the plainest, as that of
Grasshoppers; or Leap-frog, if you like that better, both Feet at once,
and close to one another; and when we have play'd enough at this, then
we'll try other Sorts.
_Lau. _ I'll play at any Sort, where there is no Danger of breaking ones
Legs; I have no Mind to make Work for the Surgeon.
_Vi. _ What if we should play at hopping?
_Lau. _ That the Ghosts play, I am not for that.
_Vi. _ It's the cleverest Way to leap with a Pole.
_Lau. _ Running is a more noble Exercise; for _Æneas_ in _Virgil_
proposed this Exercise.
_Vi. _ Very true, and he also propos'd the righting with Whirly-bats too,
and I don't like that Sport.
_Lau. _ Mark the Course, let this be the Starting-place, and yonder Oak
the Goal.
_Vi. _ I wish _Æneas_ was here, that he might propose what should be the
Conqueror's Prize.
_Lau. _ Glory is a Reward sufficient for Victory.
_Vi. _ You should rather give a Reward to him that is beat, to comfort
him.
_Lau. _ Then let the Victor's Reward be to go into the Town crowned with
a Bur.
_Vi. _ Well, 'tis done, provided you'll go before playing upon a Pipe.
_Lau. _ It is very hot.
_Vi. _ That is not strange when it is Midsummer.
_Lau. _ Swimming is better.
_Vi. _ I don't love to live like a Frog, I am a Land Animal, not an
amphibious one.
_Lau. _ But in old Time this was look'd upon to be one of the most noble
Exercises.
_Vi. _ Nay, and a very useful one too.
_Lau. _ For What?
_Vi. _ If Men are forc'd to fly in Battel, they are in the best Condition
that can run and swim best.
_Lau. _ The Art you speak of is not to be set light by; it is as
Praise-worthy sometimes to run away nimbly as it is to fight stoutly.
_Vi. _ I can't swim at all, and it is dangerous to converse with an
unaccustomed Element.
_Lau. _ You ought to learn then, for no Body was born an Artist.
_Vi. _ But I have heard of a great many of these Artists that have swum
in, but never swam out again.
_Lau. _ First try with Corks.
_Vi.
_ I can't trust more to a Cork than to my Feet; if you have a Mind
to swim, I had rather be a Spectator than an Actor.
_The CHILD'S PIETY. _
The ARGUMENT.
_This Discourse furnishes a childish Mind with pious
Instructions of Religion, in what it consists. What is to
be done in the Morning in Bed, at getting up, at Home, at
School, before Meat, after Meat, before going to Sleep.
Of beginning the Day, of praying, of behaving themselves
studiously at School, Thriftiness of Time: Age flies.
What is to be done after Supper. How we ought to sleep.
Of Behaviour at holy Worship. All Things to be applied to
ourselves. The Meditation of a pious Soul at Church. What
Preachers are chiefly to be heard. Fasting is prejudicial
to Children. Confession is to be made to Christ. The
Society of wicked Persons is to be avoided. Of the
prudent chusing a Way of Living. Holy Orders and
Matrimony are not to be entred into before the Age of
Twenty-two. What Poets are fit to be read, and how. _
ERASMUS, GASPAR.
_ERASMUS. _ Whence came you from? Out of some Alehouse?
_Ga. _ No, indeed.
_Er. _ What from a Bowling Green?
_Ga. _ No, nor from thence neither.
_Er. _ What from the Tavern then?
_Ga. _ No.
_Er. _ Well, since I can't guess, tell me.
_Ga. _ From St. _Mary's_ Church.
_Er. _ What Business had you there?
_Ga. _ I saluted some Persons.
_Er. _ Who?
_Ga. _ Christ, and some of the Saints.
_Er. _ You have more Religion than is common to one of your Age.
_Ga. _ Religion is becoming to every Age.
_Er. _ If I had a Mind to be religious, I'd become a Monk.
_Ga. _ And so would I too, if a Monk's Hood carried in it as much Piety
as it does Warmth.
_Er. _ There is an old Saying, a young Saint and an old Devil.
_Ga. _ But I believe that old Saying came from old Satan: I can hardly
think an old Man to be truly religious, that has not been so in his
young Days. Nothing is learn'd to greater Advantage, than what we learn
in our youngest Years.
_Er. _ What is that which is call'd Religion?
_Ga. _ It is the pure Worship of God, and Observation of his
Commandments.
_Er. _ What are they?
_Ga. _ It is too long to relate all; but I'll tell you in short, it
consists in four Things.
_Er. _ What are they?
_Ga. _ In the first Place, that we have a true and pious Apprehension of
God himself, and the Holy Scriptures; and that we not only stand in Awe
of him as a Lord, but that we love him with all our Heart, as a most
beneficent Father. 2. That we take the greatest Care to keep ourselves
blameless; that is, that we do no Injury to any one. 3. That we exercise
Charity, _i. e. _ to deserve well of all Persons (as much as in us lyes).
4. That we practise Patience, _i. e. _ to bear patiently Injuries that are
offered us, when we can't prevent them, not revenging them, nor
requiting Evil for Evil.
_Er. _ You hold forth finely; but do you practise what you teach?
_Ga. _ I endeavour it manfully.
_Er. _ How can you do it like a Man, when you are but a Boy?
_Ga. _ I meditate according to my Ability, and call myself to an Account
every Day; and correct myself for what I have done amiss: That was
unhandsomely done this saucily said, this was uncautiously acted; in
that it were better to have held my Peace, that was neglected.
_Er. _ When do you come to this Reckoning?
_Ga. _ Most commonly at Night; or at any Time that I am most at Leisure.
_Er. _ But tell me, in what Studies do you spend the Day?
_Ga. _ I will hide nothing from so intimate a Companion: In the Morning,
as soon as I am awake, (and that is commonly about six a Clock, or
sometimes at five) I sign myself with my Finger in the Forehead and
Breast with the Sign of the Cross.
_Er. _ What then?
_Ga. _ I begin the Day in the Name of the Father, Son, and holy Spirit.
_Er. _ Indeed that is very piously done.
_Ga. _ By and by I put up a short Ejaculation to Christ.
_Er. _ What dost thou say to him?
_Ga. _ I give him Thanks that he has been pleased to bless me that Night;
and I pray him that he would in like Manner prosper me the whole of that
Day, so as may be for his Glory, and my Soul's Good; and that he who is
the true Light that never sets, the eternal Sun, that enlivens,
nourishes and exhilarates all Things, would vouchsafe to enlighten my
Soul, that I mayn't fall into Sin; but by his Guidance, may attain
everlasting Life.
_Er. _ A very good Beginning of the Day indeed.
_Ga. _ And then having bid my Parents good Morrow, to whom next to God, I
owe the greatest Reverence, when it is Time I go to School; but so that
I may pass by some Church, if I can conveniently.
_Er. _ What do you do there?
_Ga. _ I salute Jesus again in three Words, and all the Saints, either
Men or Women; but the Virgin _Mary_ by Name, and especially that I
account most peculiarly my own.
_Er. _ Indeed you seem to have read that Sentence of _Cato, Saluta
libenter_, to good Purpose; was it not enough to have saluted Christ in
the Morning, without saluting him again presently? Are you not afraid
lest you should be troublesome by your over Officiousness?
_Ga. _ Christ loves to be often called upon.
_Er. _ But it seems to be ridiculous to speak to one you don't see.
_Ga. _ No more do I see that Part of me that speaks to him.
_Er. _ What Part is that?
_Ga. _ My Mind.
_Er. _ But it seems to be Labour lost, to salute one that does not salute
you again.
_Ga. _ He frequently salutes again by his secret Inspiration; and he
answers sufficiently that gives what is ask'd of him.
_Er. _ What is it you ask of him? For I perceive your Salutations are
petitionary, like those of Beggars.
_Ga. _ Indeed you are very right; for I pray that he, who, when he was a
Boy of about twelve Years of Age, sitting in the Temple, taught the
Doctors themselves, and to whom the heavenly Father, by a Voice from
Heaven, gave Authority to teach Mankind, saying, _This is my beloved
Son, in whom I am well pleased, hear ye him_; and who is the eternal
Wisdom of the most high Father, would vouchsafe to enlighten my
Understanding, to receive wholesome Learning, that I may use it to his
Glory.
_Er. _ Who are those Saints that you call peculiarly yours?
_Ga. _ Of the Apostles, St. _Paul_; of the Martyrs, St. _Cyprian_; of the
Doctors, St. _Jerome_; of the Virgins, St. _Agnes_.
_Er. _ How came these to be yours, more than the rest. Was it by Choice
or by Chance?
_Ga. _ They fell to me by Lot.
_Er. _ But you only salute them I suppose; do you beg any Thing of them?
_Ga. _ I pray, that by their Suffrages they would recommend me to
Christ, and procure that by his Assistance it may in Time come to pass
that I be made one of their Company.
_Er. _ Indeed what you ask for is no ordinary Thing: But what do you do
then?
_Ga. _ I go to School, and do what is to be done there with my utmost
Endeavour; I so implore Christ's Assistance, as if my Study without it
would signify nothing; and I study as if he offered no Help but to him
that labours industriously; and I do my utmost not to deserve to be
beaten, nor to offend my Master either in Word or Deed, nor any of my
Companions.
_Er. _ You are a good Boy to mind these Things.
_Ga. _ When School is done I make haste Home, and if I can I take a
Church in my Way, and in three Words, I salute Jesus again; and I pay my
Respects to my Parents; and if I have any Time, I repeat, either by
myself, or with one of my School-fellows, what was dictated in School.
_Er. _ Indeed you are a very good Husband of Time.
_Ga. _ No wonder I am of that, which is the most precious Thing in the
World, and when past is irrecoverable.
_Er. _ And _Hesiod_ teaches, that good Husbandry ought to be in the
Middle, it is too soon in the Beginning, and too late in the End.
_Ga. _ _Hesiod_ spoke right enough concerning Wine, but of Time no good
Husbandry is unseasonable. If you let a Hogshead of Wine alone it won't
empty itself; but Time is always a flying, sleeping or waking.
_Er. _ I confess so, but what do you do after that?
_Ga. _ When my Parents sit down to Dinner I say Grace, and then wait at
Table till I am bid to take my own Dinner; and having returned Thanks,
if I have any Time left I divert myself with my Companions with some
lawful Recreation till the Time comes to go to School again.
_Er. _ Do you salute Jesus again?
_Ga. _ Yes, if I have an Opportunity; but if it so happen that I have not
an Opportunity, or it be not seasonable, as I pass by the Church I
salute him mentally; and then I do what is to be done at School with all
my Might; and when I go Home again I do what I did before Dinner: After
Supper I divert myself with some pleasant Stories; and afterwards
bidding my Parents and the Family good Night, I go to Bed betimes, and
there kneeling down by the Bedside, as I have said, I say over those
Things I have been learning that Day at School; if I have committed any
great Fault, I implore Christ's Clemency, that he would pardon me, and I
promise Amendment: and if I have committed no Fault, I thank him for his
Goodness in preserving me from all Vice, and then I recommend myself to
him with all my Soul, that he would preserve me from the Attempts of my
evil Genius and filthy Dreams. When this is done, and I am got into Bed,
I cross my Forehead and Breast, and compose myself to Rest.
_Er. _ In what Posture do you compose yourself?
_Ga. _ I don't lye upon my Face or my Back, but first leaning upon my
Right-Side, I fold my Arms a-cross, so that they may defend my Breast,
as it were with the Figure of a Cross, with my Right-hand upon my Left
Shoulder, and my Left upon my Right, and so I sleep sweetly, either till
I awake of myself, or am called up.
_Er. _ You are a little Saint that can do thus.
_Ga. _ You are a little Fool for saying so.
_Er. _ I praise your Method, and I would I could practise it.
_Ga. _ Give your Mind to it and you will do it, for when once you have
accustom'd yourself to it for a few Months, these Things will be
pleasant, and become natural.
_Er. _ But I want to hear concerning divine Service.
_Ga. _ I don't neglect that, especially upon holy Days.
_Er. _ How do you manage yourself on holy Days?
_Ga. _ In the first place I examine myself if my Mind be Polluted by any
Stain of Sin.
