First he had been
astonished
at the freedom of
sarcasm these people indulged in without quarreling; next at the
non-respect of sex.
sarcasm these people indulged in without quarreling; next at the
non-respect of sex.
Warner - World's Best Literature - v21 - Rab to Rus
12118 (#156) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
by slipping from the slippery pier, close to his comrades' hands,
in a dark and gusty night; how her daughter married, and was
well-to-do, and assisted her; how she fell into a rapid decline,
and died, a picture of health to inexperienced eyes.
How she,
the mother, saw and knew and watched the treacherous advance
of disease and death; how others said gayly "her daughter was
better," and she was obliged to say "Yes. " How she had
worked eighteen hours a day at making nets; how when she
let out her nets to the other men at the herring-fishing, they
always cheated her because her man was gone. How she had
many times had to choose between begging her meal and going
to bed without it, but thank Heaven! she had always chosen
the latter.
――――
She told him of hunger, cold, and anguish. As she spoke
they became real things to him; up to that moment they had
been things in a story-book. And as she spoke she rocked her-
self from side to side.
Indeed, she was a woman "acquainted with grief. " She might
have said, "Here I and sorrow sit! This is my throne; bid kings
come bow to it! "
Her hearer felt this: and therefore this woman, poor, old,
and ugly, became sacred in his eye; it was with a strange sort
of respect that he tried to console her.
He spoke to her in tones gentle and sweet as the south wind
on a summer evening.
“Madam,” said he, "let me be so happy as to bring you some
comfort. The sorrows of the heart I cannot heal; they are for a
mightier hand: but a part of your distress appears to have been
positive need; that we can at least dispose of, and I entreat you
to believe that from this hour want shall never enter that door
again. Never! upon my honor! "
The Scotch are icebergs with volcanoes underneath; thaw the
Scotch ice, which is very cold, and you shall get to the Scotch
fire, warmer than any sun of Italy or Spain.
His Lordship had risen to go. The old wife had seemed ab-
sorbed in her own grief; she now dried her tears.
"Bide ye, sirr," said she, "till I thank ye. "
So she began to thank him, rather coldly and stiffly.
"He says ye are a lord," said she; "I dinna ken, an' I dinna
care: but ye're a gentleman, I daursay, and a kind heart ye
hae. "
## p. 12119 (#157) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
Then she began to warm.
"And ye'll never be a grain the poorer for the siller ye hae
gi'en me; for he that giveth to the poor lendeth to the Lord. "
-
12119
Then she began to glow.
"But it's no your siller; dinna think it,—na, lad, na! Oh,
fine! I ken there's mony a supper for the bairns and me in yon
bits metal; but I canna feel your siller as I feel your winsome
smile, the drop in your young een,-and the sweet words ye
gied me, in the sweet music o' your Soothern tongue, Gude
bless ye! " (Where was her ice by this time? ) Gude bless ye!
and I bless ye! "
And she did bless him; and what a blessing it was! —not a
melodious generality, like a stage parent's, or papa's in a damsel's
novel. It was like the son of Barak on Zophim.
She blessed him as one who had the power and the right to
bless or curse.
«<
She stood on the high ground of her low estate and her afflic-
tions, and demanded of their Creator to bless the fellow-creature
that had come to her aid and consolation.
This woman had suffered to the limits of endurance; yester-
day she had said, "Surely the Almighty doesna see me a' these
years! "
So now she blessed him, and her heart's blood seemed to gush
into words.
She blessed him by land and water.
She knew most mortal griefs; for she had felt them.
She warned them away from him one by one.
She knew the joys of life; for she had felt their want.
She summoned them one by one to his side.
“And a fair wind to your ship," cried she; "an' the storms
aye ten miles to leeward o' her. "
Many happy days, "an' weel spent," she wished him.
«< His love should love him dearly, or a better take her place. ”
"Health to his side by day; sleep to his pillow by night. "
A thousand good wishes came, like a torrent of fire, from her
lips, with a power that eclipsed his dreams of human eloquence;
and then, changing in a moment from the thunder of a Pythoness
to the tender music of some poetess mother, she ended:—
"An' oh, my boeny, boeny lad, may ye be wi' the rich upon
the airth a' your days,-AN' WI' THE PUIR IN THE WARLD TO
COME! "
## p. 12120 (#158) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
His Lordship's tongue refused him the thin phrases of society.
"Farewell for the present," said he, and he went quietly away.
He paced thoughtfully home.
He had drunk a fact with every sentence; and an idea with
every fact.
For the knowledge we have never realized is not knowledge
to us,
only knowledge's shadow.
—
"M"
IN THE GREEN-ROOM
From Peg Woffington'
Tell me;
R. CIBBER, what do you understand by an actor?
for I am foolish enough to respect your opinion on these
matters! "
"An actor, young lady," said he gravely, "is an artist who
has gone deep enough in his art to make dunces, critics, and
greenhorns take it for nature; moreover, he really personates,
which your mere man of the stage never does. He has learned
the true art of self-multiplication. He drops Betterton, Booth,
Wilkes, or-a-hem — »
"Cibber," inserted Sir Charles Pomander. Cibber bowed.
-in his dressing-room, and comes out young or old, a fop, a
valet, a lover, or a hero, with voice, mien, and every gesture to
match.
A grain less than this may be good speaking, fine
preaching, deep grunting, high ranting, eloquent reciting; but
I'll be hanged if it is acting! "
"Then Colley Cibber never acted," whispered Quin to Mrs.
Clive.
"Then Margaret Woffington is an actress," said M. W. : "the
fine ladies take my Lady Betty for their sister; in Mrs. Day I
pass for a woman of seventy; and in Sir Harry Wildair I have
been taken for a man. I would have told you that before, but
I didn't know it was to my credit," said she slyly, "till Mr. Cib-
ber laid down the law. "
"Proof! " said Cibber.
"A warm letter from one lady, diamond buckles from an-
other, and an offer of her hand and fortune from a third: rien
que cela. »
Mr. Cibber conveyed behind her back a look of absolute in-
credulity; she divined it.
## p. 12121 (#159) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12121
"I will not show you the letters," continued she, "because
Sir Harry, though a rake, was a gentleman: but here are the
buckles;" and she fished them out of her pocket, capacious of
such things. The buckles were gravely inspected: they made
more than one eye water; they were undeniable.
"Well, let us see what we can do for her," said the Laureate.
He tapped his box, and without a moment's hesitation produced
the most execrable distich in the language:
"Now who is like Peggy, with talent at will?
A maid loved her Harry, for want of a Bill. "
"Well, child," continued he, after the applause which follows
extemporary verses had subsided, "take me in. Play something
to make me lose sight of saucy Peg Woffington, and I'll give
the world five acts more before the curtain falls on Colley Cib-
ber. "
“If you could be deceived," put in Mr. Vane, somewhat tim-
idly. "I think there is no disguise through which grace and
beauty such as Mrs. Woffington's would not shine, to my eyes. "
"That is to praise my person at the expense of my wit, sir,
is it not? " was her reply.
This was the first word she had ever addressed to him; the
tones appeared so sweet to him that he could not find anything
to reply for listening to them; and Cibber resumed:-
"Meantime I will show you a real actress: she is coming
here to-night to meet me. Did ever you children hear of Ann
Bracegirdle? »
"Bracegirdle! " said Mrs. Clive: "why, she has been dead this
thirty years; at least I thought so. "
"Dead to the stage. There is more heat in her ashes than
in your fire, Kate Clive! Ah! here comes her messenger," con-
tinued he, as an ancient man appeared with a letter in his hand.
This letter Mrs. Woffington snatched and read, and at the same
instant in bounced the call-boy. "Epilogue called," said this
urchin, in the tone of command which these small-fry of Par-
nassus adopt; and obedient to his high behest, Mrs. Woffington
moved to the door with the Bracegirdle missive in her hand, but
not before she had delivered its general contents: "The great
actress will be here in a few minutes," said she; and she glided
swiftly out of the room.
## p. 12122 (#160) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
People whose mind or manners possess any feature, and are
not as devoid of all eccentricity as half-pounds of butter bought
of metropolitan grocers, are recommended not to leave a roomful.
of their acquaintances until the last but one. Yes, they should
always be penultimate. Perhaps Mrs. Woffington knew this; but
epilogues are stubborn things, and call-boys undeniable.
"Did you ever hear a woman whistle before? "
"Never; but I saw one sit astride of an ass in Germany! ”
"The saddle was not on her husband, I hope, madam ? »
"No, sir: the husband walked by his kinsfolk's side, and
made the best of a bad bargain, as Peggy's husband will have
to. "
"Wait till some one ventures on the gay Lothario,-illi æs
triplex; that means he must have triple brass, Kitty. "
"I deny that, sir; since his wife will always have enough for
both. "
"I have not observed the lady's brass," said Vane, trembling
with passion; "but I observed her talent, and I noticed that who-
ever attacks her to her face comes badly off. "
"Well said, sir," answered Quin; "and I wish Kitty here
would tell us why she hates Mrs. Woffington, the best-natured
woman in the theatre ? »
"I don't hate her, I don't trouble my head about her. "
"Yes, you hate her; for you never miss a cut at her, never! "
"Do you hate a haunch of venison, Quin? " said the lady.
"No! you little unnatural monster," replied Quin.
"For all that, you never miss a cut at one, so hold your
tongue! "
"Le beau raisonnement! " said Mr. Cibber. "James Quin,
don't interfere with nature's laws: let our ladies hate one another,
- it eases their minds; try to make them Christians and you will
not convert their tempers, but spoil your own. Peggy there
hates George Anne Bellamy because she has gaudy silk dresses
from Paris, by paying for them as she could, if not too stingy.
Kitty here hates Peggy because Rich has breeched her, whereas
Kitty, who now sets up for a prude, wanted to put delicacy off
and small-clothes on in Peg's stead; that is where the Kate and
Peg shoe pinches,-near the femoral artery, James.
―
"Shrimps have the souls of shrimps," resumed this censor cas-
tigatorque minorum. "Listen to me, and learn that really great
actors are great in soul, and do not blubber like a great school-
## p. 12123 (#161) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12123
girl because Anne Bellamy has two yellow-silk dresses from
Paris, as I saw Woffington blubber in this room, and would not
be comforted; nor fume like Kitty Clive, because Woffington has
a pair of breeches and a little boy's rapier to go a-playing at
acting with. When I was young, two giantesses fought for em-
pire upon this very stage, where now dwarfs crack and bounce
like parched peas. They played Roxana and Statira in the
'Rival Queens. ' Rival queens of art themselves, they put out all
their strength. In the middle of the last act the town gave
judgment in favor of Statira. What did Roxana ? Did she spill
grease on Statira's robe, as Peg Woffington would? or stab her,
as I believe Kitty here capable of doing? No! Statira was never
so tenderly killed as that night: she owned this to me. Roxana
bade the theatre farewell that night, and wrote to Statira thus-
I give you word for word: Madam, the best judge we have has
decided in your favor. I shall never play second on a stage
where I have been first so long, but I shall often be a spectator;
and methinks none will appreciate your talent more than I, who
have felt its weight. My wardrobe, one of the best in Europe,
is of no use to me: if you will honor me by selecting a few of
my dresses you will gratify me, and I shall fancy I see myself
upon the stage to greater advantage than before. >>
"And what did Statira answer, sir? " said Mr. Vane eagerly.
"She answered thus: 'Madam, the town has often been
wrong, and may have been so last night, in supposing that I
vied successfully with your merit; but thus much is certain,—
and here, madam, I am the best judge,- that off the stage you
have just conquered me. I shall wear with pride any dress you
have honored, and shall feel inspired to great exertions by your
presence among our spectators, unless indeed the sense of your
magnanimity and the recollection of your talent should damp me
by the dread of losing any portion of your good opinion. › »
"What a couple of stiff old things! " said Mrs. Clive.
"Nay, madam, say not so," cried Vane warmly: "surely this
was the lofty courtesy of two great minds, not to be overbalanced
by strife, defeat, or victory. "
"What were their names, sir? "
"Statira was the great Mrs. Oldfield.
here to-night. "
This caused a sensation.
Roxana you will see
Colley's reminiscences were interrupted by loud applause from
the theatre: the present seldom gives the past a long hearing.
## p. 12124 (#162) ##########################################
12124
CHARLES READE
The old war-horse cocked his ears.
"It is Woffington speaking the epilogue," said Quin.
"Oh! she has got the length of their foot, somehow," said a
small actress.
"And the breadth of their hands, too," said Pomander, waking
from a nap.
"It is the depth of their hearts she has sounded," said Vane.
In those days, if a metaphor started up, the poor thing was
coursed up hill and down dale, and torn limb from jacket; even
in Parliament, a trope was sometimes hunted from one session
into another.
"You were asking me about Mrs. Oldfield, sir," resumed
Cibber rather peevishly. “I will own to you, I lack words to
convey a just idea of her double and complete supremacy. But
the comedians of this day are weak-strained farceurs compared
with her, and her tragic tone was thunder set to music.
"I saw a brigadier-general cry like a child at her 'Indiana. ’
I have seen her crying with pain herself at the wing (for she
was always a great sufferer): I have seen her then spring upon
the stage as Lady Townley, and in a moment sorrow brightened
into joy; the air seemed to fill with singing-birds, that chirped
the pleasures of fashion, love, and youth, in notes sparkling like
diamonds, and stars, and prisms. She was above criticism,-out
of its scope, as is the blue sky; men went not to judge her,-
they drank her, and gazed at her, and were warmed at her, and
refreshed by her. The fops were awed into silence; and with
their humbler betters thanked Heaven for her, if they thanked
it for anything.
"In all the crowded theatre, care and pain and poverty were
banished from the memory whilst Oldfield's face spoke and her
tongue flashed melodies; the lawyer forgot his quillets; the po-
lemic, the mote in his brother's eye; the old maid, her grudge
against the two sexes; the old man, his gray hairs and his lost
hours.
And can it be that all this, which should have been
immortal, is quite, quite lost, is as though it had never been? "
he sighed. "Can it be that its fame is now sustained by me?
who twang with my poor lute, cracked and old, these feeble
praises of a broken lyre-
"Whose wires were golden, and its heavenly air
More tunable than lark to shepherd's ear,
When wheat is green, when hawthorn buds appear. '»
## p. 12125 (#163) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12125
He paused, and his eye looked back over many years; then
with a very different tone he added:
: -
"And that Jack Falstaff there must have seen her, now I
think on't. "
"Only once, sir," said Quin; "and I was but ten years old. "
"He saw her once, and he was ten years old; yet he calls
Woffington a great comedian, and my son The's wife, with her
hatchet face, the greatest tragedian he ever saw! Jemmy, what
an ass you must be! ”
"Mrs. Cibber always makes me cry, and t'other always makes
me laugh," said Quin stoutly: "that's why. "
Ce beau raisonnement met no answer but a look of sovereign
contempt.
A very trifling incident saved the ladies of the British stage.
from further criticism. There were two candles in this room,
one on each side; the call-boy had entered, and poking about for
something, knocked down and broke one of these.
"Awkward imp! " cried a velvet page.
"I'll go to the Treasury for another, ma'am," said the boy
pertly, and vanished with the fractured wax.
I take advantage of the interruption to open Mr. Vane's mind
to the reader.
First he had been astonished at the freedom of
sarcasm these people indulged in without quarreling; next at the
non-respect of sex.
"So sex is not recognized in this community," thought he.
Then the glibness and merit of some of their answers surprised
and amused him. He, like me, had seldom met an imaginative
repartee except in a play or a book. "Society's" repartees were
then, as they are now, the good old three in various dresses and
veils: Tu quoque, tu mentiris, vos damnemini; but he was sick
and dispirited on the whole, such very bright illusions had been
dimmed in these few minutes.
She was
as brilliant: but her manners, if not masculine, were
very daring; and yet when she spoke to him, a stranger, how
sweet and gentle her voice was! Then it was clear nothing but
his ignorance could have placed her at the summit of her art.
Still he clung to his enthusiasm for her. He drew Pomander
aside. "What a simplicity there is in Mrs. Woffington! " said he:
"the rest, male and female, are all so affected; she is so fresh
and natural. They are all hot-house plants; she is a cowslip
with the May dew on it. "
## p. 12126 (#164) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
"What you take for simplicity is her refined art," replied Sir
Charles.
"No! " said Vane: "I never saw a more innocent creature! "
Pomander laughed in his face: this laugh disconcerted him.
more than words; he spoke no more-he sat pensive.
He was
sorry he had come to this place, where everybody knew his
goddess, yet nobody admired, nobody loved, and alas! nobody
respected her.
He was roused from his reverie by a noise; the noise. was
caused by Cibber falling on Garrick, whom Pomander had mali-
ciously quoted against all the tragedians of Colley Cibber's day.
"I tell you," cried the veteran, "that this Garrick has banished
dignity from the stage, and given us in exchange what you and
he take for fire; but it is smoke and vapor. His manner is
little; like his person, it is all fuss and bustle. This is his idea
of a tragic scene: A little fellow comes bustling in, goes bustling
about, and runs bustling out. " Here Mr. Cibber left the room to
give greater effect to his description, but presently returned in a
mighty pother, saying: "Give me another horse! Well, where's
the horse? don't you see I'm waiting for him?
Bind up my
wounds! Look sharp now with these wounds.
Have mercy,
Heaven! but be quick about it, for the pit can't wait for Heaven. '
Bustle! bustle! bustle! "
The old dog was so irresistibly funny that the whole com-
pany were obliged to laugh; but in the midst of their merriment
Mrs. Woffington's voice was heard at the door.
"This way, madam. "
A clear and somewhat shrill voice replied, "I know the way
better than you, child;" and a stately old lady appeared on the
threshold.
"Bracegirdle," said Mr. Cibber.
It may well be supposed that every eye was turned on this
new-comer,—that Roxana for whom Mr. Cibber's story had pre-
pared a peculiar interest. She was dressed in a rich green-
velvet gown with gold fringe. Cibber remembered it: she had
played the Eastern Queen' in it. Heaven forgive all concerned!
It was fearfully pinched in at the waist and ribs, so as to give
the idea of wood inside, not woman.
Her hair and eyebrows were iron-gray, and she had lost a
front tooth, or she would still have been eminently handsome.
She was tall and straight as a dart, and her noble port betrayed
## p. 12127 (#165) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12127
none of the weakness of age; only it was to be seen that her
hands were a little weak, and the gold-headed crutch struck the
ground rather sharply, as if it did a little limbs'-duty.
Such was the lady who marched into the middle of the room,
with a "How do, Colley? " and looking over the company's heads
as if she did not see them, regarded the four walls with some
interest. Like a cat, she seemed to think more of places than of
folk. The page obsequiously offered her a chair.
"Not so clean as it used to be," said Mrs. Bracegirdle.
Unfortunately, in making this remark, the old lady graciously
patted the page's head for offering her the chair; and this action.
gave, with some of the ill-constituted minds that are ever on the
titter, a ridiculous direction to a remark intended, I believe, for
the paint and wainscots, etc.
"Nothing is as it used to be," remarked Mr. Cibber.
"All the better for everything," said Mrs. Clive.
"We were laughing at this mighty little David, first actor of
this mighty little age. "
Now if Mr. Cibber thought to find in the new-comer an ally
of the past in its indiscriminate attack upon the present, he was
much mistaken; for the old actress made onslaught on this non-
sense at once.
"Ay, ay," said she, "and not the first time by many hun-
dreds. 'Tis a disease you have. Cure yourself, Colley. David
Garrick pleases the public; and in trifles like acting, that take
nobody to heaven, to please all the world is to be great. Some
pretend to higher aims, but none have 'em. You may hide this
from young fools, mayhap, but not from an old 'oman like me.
He! he he! No, no, no,- not from an old 'oman like me. "
She then turned round in her chair, and with that sudden,
unaccountable snappishness of tone to which the brisk old are
subject, she snarled: "Gie me a pinch of snuff, some of ye, do. "
Tobacco dust was instantly at her disposal. She took it with
the points of her fingers, delicately, and divested the crime of
half its uncleanness and vulgarity-more an angel couldn't.
"Monstrous sensible woman, though," whispered Quin to
Clive.
"Hey, sir! what do you say, sir? for I'm a little deaf. " (Not
very to praise, it seems. )
"That your judgment, madam, is equal to the reputation of
your talent. ”
## p. 12128 (#166) ##########################################
12128
CHARLES READE
The words were hardly spoken, before the old lady rose
upright as a a tower. She then made an oblique preliminary
sweep, and came down with such a curtsy as the young had
never seen.
James Quin, not to disgrace his generation, attempted a cor-
responding bow, for which his figure and apoplectic tendency
rendered him unfit; and whilst he was transacting it, the grace-
ful Cibber stepped gravely up, and looked down and up the
process with his glass, like a naturalist inspecting some strange
capriccio of an orang-outang. The gymnastics of courtesy ended
without back-falls, Cibber lowered his tone:-
"You are right, Bracy,- it is nonsense denying the young
fellow's talent; but his Othello, now, Bracy! be just-his
Othello! "
"Oh dear! oh dear! " cried she: "I thought it was Desde-
mona's little black boy come in without the tea-kettle. "
Quin laughed uproariously.
"It made me laugh a deal more than Mr. Quin's Falstaff. Oh
dear! oh dear! "
"Falstaff, indeed! Snuff! " in the tone of a trumpet.
Quin secretly revoked his good opinion of this woman's sense.
"Madam," said the page timidly, "if you would but favor us
with a specimen of the old style! "
"Well, child, why not? Only what makes you mumble like
that? But they all do it now, I see. Bless my soul! our words
used to come out like brandy-cherries; but now a sentence is
like raspberry jam, on the stage and off "
Cibber chuckled.
“And why don't you men carry yourself like Cibber here? "
"Don't press that question," said Colley dryly.
"A monstrous poor actor, though," said the merciless old
woman, in a mock aside to the others,-"only twenty shillings a
week for half his life;" and her shoulders went up to her ears
then she fell into a half-revery. "Yes, we were distinct,"
said she; "but I must own, children, we were slow. Once in
the midst of a beautiful tirade my lover went to sleep and fell
against me. A mighty pretty epigram, twenty lines, was writ
on't by one of my gallants. Have ye as many of them as we
used? "
«<
"In that respect," said the page, we are not behind our
great-grandmothers. "
## p. 12129 (#167) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12129
"I call that pert," said Mrs. Bracegirdle, with the air of one
drawing scientific distinctions. "Now, is that a boy or a lady
that spoke to me last? "
"By its dress, I should say a boy," said Cibber, with his glass;
"by its assurance, a lady! "
"There's one clever woman amongst ye: Peg something, plays
Lothario, Lady Betty Modish, and what not.
"What! admire Woffington? " screamed Mrs. Clive: "why, she
is the greatest gabbler on the stage. "
"I don't care," was the reply: "there's nature about the jade.
Don't contradict me," added she with sudden fury: "a parcel of
children! "
“No, madam,” said Clive humbly. "Mr. Cibber, will you try
and prevail on Mrs. Bracegirdle to favor us with a recitation? "
Cibber handed his cane with pomp to a small actor. Brace-
girdle did the same; and striking the attitudes that had passed
for heroic in their day, they declaimed out of the 'Rival Queens'
two or three tirades, which I graciously spare the reader of this
tale. Their elocution was neat and silvery; but not one bit like
the way people speak in streets, palaces, fields, roads, and rooms.
They had not made the grand discovery, which Mr. A. Wigan on
the stage, and every man of sense off it, has made in our day
and nation: namely, that the stage is a representation not of
stage, but of life; and that an actor ought to speak and act in
imitation of human beings, not of speaking machines that have
run and creaked in a stage groove, with their eyes shut upon the
world at large, upon nature, upon truth, upon man, upon woman,
and upon child.
"This is slow! " cried Cibber: "let us show these young people
how ladies and gentlemen moved fifty years ago; dansons. "
A fiddler was caught, a beautiful slow minuet played, and a
bit of "solemn dancing" done. Certainly it was not gay, but it
must be owned it was beautiful; it was the dance of kings, the
poetry of the courtly saloon.
The retired actress, however, had friskier notions left in her:
"This is slow! " cried she, and bade the fiddler play "The Wind
that Shakes the Barley,'-an ancient jig tune; this she danced to
in a style that utterly astounded the spectators.
She showed them what fun was: her feet and her stick were
all echoes to the mad strain; out went her heel behind, and re-
turning, drove her four yards forward. She made unaccountable
XXI-759
## p. 12130 (#168) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
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slants, and cut them all over in turn if they did not jump for
it. Roars of inextinguishable laughter arose; it would have made
an oyster merry. Suddenly she stopped, and put her hands to
her side, and soon after she gave a vehement cry of pain.
The laughter ceased.
She gave another cry of such agony that they were all round
her in a moment.
"Oh! help me, ladies," screamed the poor woman, in tones as
feminine as they were heart-rending and piteous. "Oh, my back! .
my loins! I suffer, gentlemen," said the poor thing, faintly
What was to be done? Mr. Vane offered his penknife to cut
her laces.
"You shall cut my head off sooner," cried she with sudden
energy. Don't pity me," said she sadly, "I don't deserve it;"
then lifting her eyes, she exclaimed with a sad air of self-
reproach, "O vanity! do you never leave a woman? »
"Nay, madam! " whimpered the page, who was a good-hearted
girl: "'twas your great complaisance for us, not vanity.
oh! oh! " and she began to blubber to make matters better.
"No, my children," said the old lady, "'twas vanity. I wanted
to show you what an old 'oman could do; and I have humiliated
myself, trying to outshine younger folk. I am justly humiliated,
as you see;" and she began to cry a little.
"This is very painful," said Cibber.
Oh!
Mrs. Bracegirdle now raised her eyes (they had set her in a
chair), and looking sweetly, tenderly, and earnestly on her old
companion, she said to him, slowly, gently, but impressively:-
"Colley, at threescore years and ten, this was ill done of us!
You and I are here now-for what? to cheer the young up the
hill we mounted years ago. And, old friend, if we detract from
them we discourage them. A great sin in the old! Every dog
his day. We have had ours. " Here she smiled, then laying her
hand tenderly in the old man's, she added with calm solemnity:
"And now we must go quietly towards our rest, and strut and
fret no more the few last minutes of life's fleeting hour. "
How tame my cacotype of these words compared with what
they were! I am ashamed of them and myself, and the human
craft of writing, which, though commoner far, is so miserably
behind the godlike art of speech: Si ipsam audivisses!
These ink scratches, which in the imperfection of language
we have called words till the unthinking actually dream they
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CHARLES READE
12131
are words, but which are the shadows of the corpses of words,
these word-shadows then were living powers on her lips, and
subdued, as eloquence always does, every heart within reach of
the imperial tongue.
The young loved her: and the old man, softened and van-
quished, and mindful of his failing life, was silent, and pressed
his handkerchief to his eyes a moment; then he said:
-
-
"No, Bracy-no. Be composed, I pray you. She is right.
Young people, forgive me that I love the dead too well, and
the days when I was what you are now. Drat the woman," con-
tinued he, half ashamed of his emotion: "she makes us laugh
and makes us cry, just as she used. "
"What does he say, young woman? " said the old lady dryly,
to Mrs. Clive.
"He says you make us laugh, and make us cry, madam; and
so you do me, I'm sure. "
"And that's Peg Woffington's notion of an actress! Better
it, Cibber and Bracegirdle, if you can," said the other, rising up
like lightning.
She then threw Colley Cibber a note, and walked coolly and
rapidly out of the room, without looking once behind her.
The rest stood transfixed, looking at one another and at the
empty chair. Then Cibber opened and read the note aloud. It
was from Mrs.
12118
CHARLES READE
by slipping from the slippery pier, close to his comrades' hands,
in a dark and gusty night; how her daughter married, and was
well-to-do, and assisted her; how she fell into a rapid decline,
and died, a picture of health to inexperienced eyes.
How she,
the mother, saw and knew and watched the treacherous advance
of disease and death; how others said gayly "her daughter was
better," and she was obliged to say "Yes. " How she had
worked eighteen hours a day at making nets; how when she
let out her nets to the other men at the herring-fishing, they
always cheated her because her man was gone. How she had
many times had to choose between begging her meal and going
to bed without it, but thank Heaven! she had always chosen
the latter.
――――
She told him of hunger, cold, and anguish. As she spoke
they became real things to him; up to that moment they had
been things in a story-book. And as she spoke she rocked her-
self from side to side.
Indeed, she was a woman "acquainted with grief. " She might
have said, "Here I and sorrow sit! This is my throne; bid kings
come bow to it! "
Her hearer felt this: and therefore this woman, poor, old,
and ugly, became sacred in his eye; it was with a strange sort
of respect that he tried to console her.
He spoke to her in tones gentle and sweet as the south wind
on a summer evening.
“Madam,” said he, "let me be so happy as to bring you some
comfort. The sorrows of the heart I cannot heal; they are for a
mightier hand: but a part of your distress appears to have been
positive need; that we can at least dispose of, and I entreat you
to believe that from this hour want shall never enter that door
again. Never! upon my honor! "
The Scotch are icebergs with volcanoes underneath; thaw the
Scotch ice, which is very cold, and you shall get to the Scotch
fire, warmer than any sun of Italy or Spain.
His Lordship had risen to go. The old wife had seemed ab-
sorbed in her own grief; she now dried her tears.
"Bide ye, sirr," said she, "till I thank ye. "
So she began to thank him, rather coldly and stiffly.
"He says ye are a lord," said she; "I dinna ken, an' I dinna
care: but ye're a gentleman, I daursay, and a kind heart ye
hae. "
## p. 12119 (#157) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
Then she began to warm.
"And ye'll never be a grain the poorer for the siller ye hae
gi'en me; for he that giveth to the poor lendeth to the Lord. "
-
12119
Then she began to glow.
"But it's no your siller; dinna think it,—na, lad, na! Oh,
fine! I ken there's mony a supper for the bairns and me in yon
bits metal; but I canna feel your siller as I feel your winsome
smile, the drop in your young een,-and the sweet words ye
gied me, in the sweet music o' your Soothern tongue, Gude
bless ye! " (Where was her ice by this time? ) Gude bless ye!
and I bless ye! "
And she did bless him; and what a blessing it was! —not a
melodious generality, like a stage parent's, or papa's in a damsel's
novel. It was like the son of Barak on Zophim.
She blessed him as one who had the power and the right to
bless or curse.
«<
She stood on the high ground of her low estate and her afflic-
tions, and demanded of their Creator to bless the fellow-creature
that had come to her aid and consolation.
This woman had suffered to the limits of endurance; yester-
day she had said, "Surely the Almighty doesna see me a' these
years! "
So now she blessed him, and her heart's blood seemed to gush
into words.
She blessed him by land and water.
She knew most mortal griefs; for she had felt them.
She warned them away from him one by one.
She knew the joys of life; for she had felt their want.
She summoned them one by one to his side.
“And a fair wind to your ship," cried she; "an' the storms
aye ten miles to leeward o' her. "
Many happy days, "an' weel spent," she wished him.
«< His love should love him dearly, or a better take her place. ”
"Health to his side by day; sleep to his pillow by night. "
A thousand good wishes came, like a torrent of fire, from her
lips, with a power that eclipsed his dreams of human eloquence;
and then, changing in a moment from the thunder of a Pythoness
to the tender music of some poetess mother, she ended:—
"An' oh, my boeny, boeny lad, may ye be wi' the rich upon
the airth a' your days,-AN' WI' THE PUIR IN THE WARLD TO
COME! "
## p. 12120 (#158) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
His Lordship's tongue refused him the thin phrases of society.
"Farewell for the present," said he, and he went quietly away.
He paced thoughtfully home.
He had drunk a fact with every sentence; and an idea with
every fact.
For the knowledge we have never realized is not knowledge
to us,
only knowledge's shadow.
—
"M"
IN THE GREEN-ROOM
From Peg Woffington'
Tell me;
R. CIBBER, what do you understand by an actor?
for I am foolish enough to respect your opinion on these
matters! "
"An actor, young lady," said he gravely, "is an artist who
has gone deep enough in his art to make dunces, critics, and
greenhorns take it for nature; moreover, he really personates,
which your mere man of the stage never does. He has learned
the true art of self-multiplication. He drops Betterton, Booth,
Wilkes, or-a-hem — »
"Cibber," inserted Sir Charles Pomander. Cibber bowed.
-in his dressing-room, and comes out young or old, a fop, a
valet, a lover, or a hero, with voice, mien, and every gesture to
match.
A grain less than this may be good speaking, fine
preaching, deep grunting, high ranting, eloquent reciting; but
I'll be hanged if it is acting! "
"Then Colley Cibber never acted," whispered Quin to Mrs.
Clive.
"Then Margaret Woffington is an actress," said M. W. : "the
fine ladies take my Lady Betty for their sister; in Mrs. Day I
pass for a woman of seventy; and in Sir Harry Wildair I have
been taken for a man. I would have told you that before, but
I didn't know it was to my credit," said she slyly, "till Mr. Cib-
ber laid down the law. "
"Proof! " said Cibber.
"A warm letter from one lady, diamond buckles from an-
other, and an offer of her hand and fortune from a third: rien
que cela. »
Mr. Cibber conveyed behind her back a look of absolute in-
credulity; she divined it.
## p. 12121 (#159) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12121
"I will not show you the letters," continued she, "because
Sir Harry, though a rake, was a gentleman: but here are the
buckles;" and she fished them out of her pocket, capacious of
such things. The buckles were gravely inspected: they made
more than one eye water; they were undeniable.
"Well, let us see what we can do for her," said the Laureate.
He tapped his box, and without a moment's hesitation produced
the most execrable distich in the language:
"Now who is like Peggy, with talent at will?
A maid loved her Harry, for want of a Bill. "
"Well, child," continued he, after the applause which follows
extemporary verses had subsided, "take me in. Play something
to make me lose sight of saucy Peg Woffington, and I'll give
the world five acts more before the curtain falls on Colley Cib-
ber. "
“If you could be deceived," put in Mr. Vane, somewhat tim-
idly. "I think there is no disguise through which grace and
beauty such as Mrs. Woffington's would not shine, to my eyes. "
"That is to praise my person at the expense of my wit, sir,
is it not? " was her reply.
This was the first word she had ever addressed to him; the
tones appeared so sweet to him that he could not find anything
to reply for listening to them; and Cibber resumed:-
"Meantime I will show you a real actress: she is coming
here to-night to meet me. Did ever you children hear of Ann
Bracegirdle? »
"Bracegirdle! " said Mrs. Clive: "why, she has been dead this
thirty years; at least I thought so. "
"Dead to the stage. There is more heat in her ashes than
in your fire, Kate Clive! Ah! here comes her messenger," con-
tinued he, as an ancient man appeared with a letter in his hand.
This letter Mrs. Woffington snatched and read, and at the same
instant in bounced the call-boy. "Epilogue called," said this
urchin, in the tone of command which these small-fry of Par-
nassus adopt; and obedient to his high behest, Mrs. Woffington
moved to the door with the Bracegirdle missive in her hand, but
not before she had delivered its general contents: "The great
actress will be here in a few minutes," said she; and she glided
swiftly out of the room.
## p. 12122 (#160) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
People whose mind or manners possess any feature, and are
not as devoid of all eccentricity as half-pounds of butter bought
of metropolitan grocers, are recommended not to leave a roomful.
of their acquaintances until the last but one. Yes, they should
always be penultimate. Perhaps Mrs. Woffington knew this; but
epilogues are stubborn things, and call-boys undeniable.
"Did you ever hear a woman whistle before? "
"Never; but I saw one sit astride of an ass in Germany! ”
"The saddle was not on her husband, I hope, madam ? »
"No, sir: the husband walked by his kinsfolk's side, and
made the best of a bad bargain, as Peggy's husband will have
to. "
"Wait till some one ventures on the gay Lothario,-illi æs
triplex; that means he must have triple brass, Kitty. "
"I deny that, sir; since his wife will always have enough for
both. "
"I have not observed the lady's brass," said Vane, trembling
with passion; "but I observed her talent, and I noticed that who-
ever attacks her to her face comes badly off. "
"Well said, sir," answered Quin; "and I wish Kitty here
would tell us why she hates Mrs. Woffington, the best-natured
woman in the theatre ? »
"I don't hate her, I don't trouble my head about her. "
"Yes, you hate her; for you never miss a cut at her, never! "
"Do you hate a haunch of venison, Quin? " said the lady.
"No! you little unnatural monster," replied Quin.
"For all that, you never miss a cut at one, so hold your
tongue! "
"Le beau raisonnement! " said Mr. Cibber. "James Quin,
don't interfere with nature's laws: let our ladies hate one another,
- it eases their minds; try to make them Christians and you will
not convert their tempers, but spoil your own. Peggy there
hates George Anne Bellamy because she has gaudy silk dresses
from Paris, by paying for them as she could, if not too stingy.
Kitty here hates Peggy because Rich has breeched her, whereas
Kitty, who now sets up for a prude, wanted to put delicacy off
and small-clothes on in Peg's stead; that is where the Kate and
Peg shoe pinches,-near the femoral artery, James.
―
"Shrimps have the souls of shrimps," resumed this censor cas-
tigatorque minorum. "Listen to me, and learn that really great
actors are great in soul, and do not blubber like a great school-
## p. 12123 (#161) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12123
girl because Anne Bellamy has two yellow-silk dresses from
Paris, as I saw Woffington blubber in this room, and would not
be comforted; nor fume like Kitty Clive, because Woffington has
a pair of breeches and a little boy's rapier to go a-playing at
acting with. When I was young, two giantesses fought for em-
pire upon this very stage, where now dwarfs crack and bounce
like parched peas. They played Roxana and Statira in the
'Rival Queens. ' Rival queens of art themselves, they put out all
their strength. In the middle of the last act the town gave
judgment in favor of Statira. What did Roxana ? Did she spill
grease on Statira's robe, as Peg Woffington would? or stab her,
as I believe Kitty here capable of doing? No! Statira was never
so tenderly killed as that night: she owned this to me. Roxana
bade the theatre farewell that night, and wrote to Statira thus-
I give you word for word: Madam, the best judge we have has
decided in your favor. I shall never play second on a stage
where I have been first so long, but I shall often be a spectator;
and methinks none will appreciate your talent more than I, who
have felt its weight. My wardrobe, one of the best in Europe,
is of no use to me: if you will honor me by selecting a few of
my dresses you will gratify me, and I shall fancy I see myself
upon the stage to greater advantage than before. >>
"And what did Statira answer, sir? " said Mr. Vane eagerly.
"She answered thus: 'Madam, the town has often been
wrong, and may have been so last night, in supposing that I
vied successfully with your merit; but thus much is certain,—
and here, madam, I am the best judge,- that off the stage you
have just conquered me. I shall wear with pride any dress you
have honored, and shall feel inspired to great exertions by your
presence among our spectators, unless indeed the sense of your
magnanimity and the recollection of your talent should damp me
by the dread of losing any portion of your good opinion. › »
"What a couple of stiff old things! " said Mrs. Clive.
"Nay, madam, say not so," cried Vane warmly: "surely this
was the lofty courtesy of two great minds, not to be overbalanced
by strife, defeat, or victory. "
"What were their names, sir? "
"Statira was the great Mrs. Oldfield.
here to-night. "
This caused a sensation.
Roxana you will see
Colley's reminiscences were interrupted by loud applause from
the theatre: the present seldom gives the past a long hearing.
## p. 12124 (#162) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
The old war-horse cocked his ears.
"It is Woffington speaking the epilogue," said Quin.
"Oh! she has got the length of their foot, somehow," said a
small actress.
"And the breadth of their hands, too," said Pomander, waking
from a nap.
"It is the depth of their hearts she has sounded," said Vane.
In those days, if a metaphor started up, the poor thing was
coursed up hill and down dale, and torn limb from jacket; even
in Parliament, a trope was sometimes hunted from one session
into another.
"You were asking me about Mrs. Oldfield, sir," resumed
Cibber rather peevishly. “I will own to you, I lack words to
convey a just idea of her double and complete supremacy. But
the comedians of this day are weak-strained farceurs compared
with her, and her tragic tone was thunder set to music.
"I saw a brigadier-general cry like a child at her 'Indiana. ’
I have seen her crying with pain herself at the wing (for she
was always a great sufferer): I have seen her then spring upon
the stage as Lady Townley, and in a moment sorrow brightened
into joy; the air seemed to fill with singing-birds, that chirped
the pleasures of fashion, love, and youth, in notes sparkling like
diamonds, and stars, and prisms. She was above criticism,-out
of its scope, as is the blue sky; men went not to judge her,-
they drank her, and gazed at her, and were warmed at her, and
refreshed by her. The fops were awed into silence; and with
their humbler betters thanked Heaven for her, if they thanked
it for anything.
"In all the crowded theatre, care and pain and poverty were
banished from the memory whilst Oldfield's face spoke and her
tongue flashed melodies; the lawyer forgot his quillets; the po-
lemic, the mote in his brother's eye; the old maid, her grudge
against the two sexes; the old man, his gray hairs and his lost
hours.
And can it be that all this, which should have been
immortal, is quite, quite lost, is as though it had never been? "
he sighed. "Can it be that its fame is now sustained by me?
who twang with my poor lute, cracked and old, these feeble
praises of a broken lyre-
"Whose wires were golden, and its heavenly air
More tunable than lark to shepherd's ear,
When wheat is green, when hawthorn buds appear. '»
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CHARLES READE
12125
He paused, and his eye looked back over many years; then
with a very different tone he added:
: -
"And that Jack Falstaff there must have seen her, now I
think on't. "
"Only once, sir," said Quin; "and I was but ten years old. "
"He saw her once, and he was ten years old; yet he calls
Woffington a great comedian, and my son The's wife, with her
hatchet face, the greatest tragedian he ever saw! Jemmy, what
an ass you must be! ”
"Mrs. Cibber always makes me cry, and t'other always makes
me laugh," said Quin stoutly: "that's why. "
Ce beau raisonnement met no answer but a look of sovereign
contempt.
A very trifling incident saved the ladies of the British stage.
from further criticism. There were two candles in this room,
one on each side; the call-boy had entered, and poking about for
something, knocked down and broke one of these.
"Awkward imp! " cried a velvet page.
"I'll go to the Treasury for another, ma'am," said the boy
pertly, and vanished with the fractured wax.
I take advantage of the interruption to open Mr. Vane's mind
to the reader.
First he had been astonished at the freedom of
sarcasm these people indulged in without quarreling; next at the
non-respect of sex.
"So sex is not recognized in this community," thought he.
Then the glibness and merit of some of their answers surprised
and amused him. He, like me, had seldom met an imaginative
repartee except in a play or a book. "Society's" repartees were
then, as they are now, the good old three in various dresses and
veils: Tu quoque, tu mentiris, vos damnemini; but he was sick
and dispirited on the whole, such very bright illusions had been
dimmed in these few minutes.
She was
as brilliant: but her manners, if not masculine, were
very daring; and yet when she spoke to him, a stranger, how
sweet and gentle her voice was! Then it was clear nothing but
his ignorance could have placed her at the summit of her art.
Still he clung to his enthusiasm for her. He drew Pomander
aside. "What a simplicity there is in Mrs. Woffington! " said he:
"the rest, male and female, are all so affected; she is so fresh
and natural. They are all hot-house plants; she is a cowslip
with the May dew on it. "
## p. 12126 (#164) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
"What you take for simplicity is her refined art," replied Sir
Charles.
"No! " said Vane: "I never saw a more innocent creature! "
Pomander laughed in his face: this laugh disconcerted him.
more than words; he spoke no more-he sat pensive.
He was
sorry he had come to this place, where everybody knew his
goddess, yet nobody admired, nobody loved, and alas! nobody
respected her.
He was roused from his reverie by a noise; the noise. was
caused by Cibber falling on Garrick, whom Pomander had mali-
ciously quoted against all the tragedians of Colley Cibber's day.
"I tell you," cried the veteran, "that this Garrick has banished
dignity from the stage, and given us in exchange what you and
he take for fire; but it is smoke and vapor. His manner is
little; like his person, it is all fuss and bustle. This is his idea
of a tragic scene: A little fellow comes bustling in, goes bustling
about, and runs bustling out. " Here Mr. Cibber left the room to
give greater effect to his description, but presently returned in a
mighty pother, saying: "Give me another horse! Well, where's
the horse? don't you see I'm waiting for him?
Bind up my
wounds! Look sharp now with these wounds.
Have mercy,
Heaven! but be quick about it, for the pit can't wait for Heaven. '
Bustle! bustle! bustle! "
The old dog was so irresistibly funny that the whole com-
pany were obliged to laugh; but in the midst of their merriment
Mrs. Woffington's voice was heard at the door.
"This way, madam. "
A clear and somewhat shrill voice replied, "I know the way
better than you, child;" and a stately old lady appeared on the
threshold.
"Bracegirdle," said Mr. Cibber.
It may well be supposed that every eye was turned on this
new-comer,—that Roxana for whom Mr. Cibber's story had pre-
pared a peculiar interest. She was dressed in a rich green-
velvet gown with gold fringe. Cibber remembered it: she had
played the Eastern Queen' in it. Heaven forgive all concerned!
It was fearfully pinched in at the waist and ribs, so as to give
the idea of wood inside, not woman.
Her hair and eyebrows were iron-gray, and she had lost a
front tooth, or she would still have been eminently handsome.
She was tall and straight as a dart, and her noble port betrayed
## p. 12127 (#165) ##########################################
CHARLES READE
12127
none of the weakness of age; only it was to be seen that her
hands were a little weak, and the gold-headed crutch struck the
ground rather sharply, as if it did a little limbs'-duty.
Such was the lady who marched into the middle of the room,
with a "How do, Colley? " and looking over the company's heads
as if she did not see them, regarded the four walls with some
interest. Like a cat, she seemed to think more of places than of
folk. The page obsequiously offered her a chair.
"Not so clean as it used to be," said Mrs. Bracegirdle.
Unfortunately, in making this remark, the old lady graciously
patted the page's head for offering her the chair; and this action.
gave, with some of the ill-constituted minds that are ever on the
titter, a ridiculous direction to a remark intended, I believe, for
the paint and wainscots, etc.
"Nothing is as it used to be," remarked Mr. Cibber.
"All the better for everything," said Mrs. Clive.
"We were laughing at this mighty little David, first actor of
this mighty little age. "
Now if Mr. Cibber thought to find in the new-comer an ally
of the past in its indiscriminate attack upon the present, he was
much mistaken; for the old actress made onslaught on this non-
sense at once.
"Ay, ay," said she, "and not the first time by many hun-
dreds. 'Tis a disease you have. Cure yourself, Colley. David
Garrick pleases the public; and in trifles like acting, that take
nobody to heaven, to please all the world is to be great. Some
pretend to higher aims, but none have 'em. You may hide this
from young fools, mayhap, but not from an old 'oman like me.
He! he he! No, no, no,- not from an old 'oman like me. "
She then turned round in her chair, and with that sudden,
unaccountable snappishness of tone to which the brisk old are
subject, she snarled: "Gie me a pinch of snuff, some of ye, do. "
Tobacco dust was instantly at her disposal. She took it with
the points of her fingers, delicately, and divested the crime of
half its uncleanness and vulgarity-more an angel couldn't.
"Monstrous sensible woman, though," whispered Quin to
Clive.
"Hey, sir! what do you say, sir? for I'm a little deaf. " (Not
very to praise, it seems. )
"That your judgment, madam, is equal to the reputation of
your talent. ”
## p. 12128 (#166) ##########################################
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CHARLES READE
The words were hardly spoken, before the old lady rose
upright as a a tower. She then made an oblique preliminary
sweep, and came down with such a curtsy as the young had
never seen.
James Quin, not to disgrace his generation, attempted a cor-
responding bow, for which his figure and apoplectic tendency
rendered him unfit; and whilst he was transacting it, the grace-
ful Cibber stepped gravely up, and looked down and up the
process with his glass, like a naturalist inspecting some strange
capriccio of an orang-outang. The gymnastics of courtesy ended
without back-falls, Cibber lowered his tone:-
"You are right, Bracy,- it is nonsense denying the young
fellow's talent; but his Othello, now, Bracy! be just-his
Othello! "
"Oh dear! oh dear! " cried she: "I thought it was Desde-
mona's little black boy come in without the tea-kettle. "
Quin laughed uproariously.
"It made me laugh a deal more than Mr. Quin's Falstaff. Oh
dear! oh dear! "
"Falstaff, indeed! Snuff! " in the tone of a trumpet.
Quin secretly revoked his good opinion of this woman's sense.
"Madam," said the page timidly, "if you would but favor us
with a specimen of the old style! "
"Well, child, why not? Only what makes you mumble like
that? But they all do it now, I see. Bless my soul! our words
used to come out like brandy-cherries; but now a sentence is
like raspberry jam, on the stage and off "
Cibber chuckled.
“And why don't you men carry yourself like Cibber here? "
"Don't press that question," said Colley dryly.
"A monstrous poor actor, though," said the merciless old
woman, in a mock aside to the others,-"only twenty shillings a
week for half his life;" and her shoulders went up to her ears
then she fell into a half-revery. "Yes, we were distinct,"
said she; "but I must own, children, we were slow. Once in
the midst of a beautiful tirade my lover went to sleep and fell
against me. A mighty pretty epigram, twenty lines, was writ
on't by one of my gallants. Have ye as many of them as we
used? "
«<
"In that respect," said the page, we are not behind our
great-grandmothers. "
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CHARLES READE
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"I call that pert," said Mrs. Bracegirdle, with the air of one
drawing scientific distinctions. "Now, is that a boy or a lady
that spoke to me last? "
"By its dress, I should say a boy," said Cibber, with his glass;
"by its assurance, a lady! "
"There's one clever woman amongst ye: Peg something, plays
Lothario, Lady Betty Modish, and what not.
"What! admire Woffington? " screamed Mrs. Clive: "why, she
is the greatest gabbler on the stage. "
"I don't care," was the reply: "there's nature about the jade.
Don't contradict me," added she with sudden fury: "a parcel of
children! "
“No, madam,” said Clive humbly. "Mr. Cibber, will you try
and prevail on Mrs. Bracegirdle to favor us with a recitation? "
Cibber handed his cane with pomp to a small actor. Brace-
girdle did the same; and striking the attitudes that had passed
for heroic in their day, they declaimed out of the 'Rival Queens'
two or three tirades, which I graciously spare the reader of this
tale. Their elocution was neat and silvery; but not one bit like
the way people speak in streets, palaces, fields, roads, and rooms.
They had not made the grand discovery, which Mr. A. Wigan on
the stage, and every man of sense off it, has made in our day
and nation: namely, that the stage is a representation not of
stage, but of life; and that an actor ought to speak and act in
imitation of human beings, not of speaking machines that have
run and creaked in a stage groove, with their eyes shut upon the
world at large, upon nature, upon truth, upon man, upon woman,
and upon child.
"This is slow! " cried Cibber: "let us show these young people
how ladies and gentlemen moved fifty years ago; dansons. "
A fiddler was caught, a beautiful slow minuet played, and a
bit of "solemn dancing" done. Certainly it was not gay, but it
must be owned it was beautiful; it was the dance of kings, the
poetry of the courtly saloon.
The retired actress, however, had friskier notions left in her:
"This is slow! " cried she, and bade the fiddler play "The Wind
that Shakes the Barley,'-an ancient jig tune; this she danced to
in a style that utterly astounded the spectators.
She showed them what fun was: her feet and her stick were
all echoes to the mad strain; out went her heel behind, and re-
turning, drove her four yards forward. She made unaccountable
XXI-759
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slants, and cut them all over in turn if they did not jump for
it. Roars of inextinguishable laughter arose; it would have made
an oyster merry. Suddenly she stopped, and put her hands to
her side, and soon after she gave a vehement cry of pain.
The laughter ceased.
She gave another cry of such agony that they were all round
her in a moment.
"Oh! help me, ladies," screamed the poor woman, in tones as
feminine as they were heart-rending and piteous. "Oh, my back! .
my loins! I suffer, gentlemen," said the poor thing, faintly
What was to be done? Mr. Vane offered his penknife to cut
her laces.
"You shall cut my head off sooner," cried she with sudden
energy. Don't pity me," said she sadly, "I don't deserve it;"
then lifting her eyes, she exclaimed with a sad air of self-
reproach, "O vanity! do you never leave a woman? »
"Nay, madam! " whimpered the page, who was a good-hearted
girl: "'twas your great complaisance for us, not vanity.
oh! oh! " and she began to blubber to make matters better.
"No, my children," said the old lady, "'twas vanity. I wanted
to show you what an old 'oman could do; and I have humiliated
myself, trying to outshine younger folk. I am justly humiliated,
as you see;" and she began to cry a little.
"This is very painful," said Cibber.
Oh!
Mrs. Bracegirdle now raised her eyes (they had set her in a
chair), and looking sweetly, tenderly, and earnestly on her old
companion, she said to him, slowly, gently, but impressively:-
"Colley, at threescore years and ten, this was ill done of us!
You and I are here now-for what? to cheer the young up the
hill we mounted years ago. And, old friend, if we detract from
them we discourage them. A great sin in the old! Every dog
his day. We have had ours. " Here she smiled, then laying her
hand tenderly in the old man's, she added with calm solemnity:
"And now we must go quietly towards our rest, and strut and
fret no more the few last minutes of life's fleeting hour. "
How tame my cacotype of these words compared with what
they were! I am ashamed of them and myself, and the human
craft of writing, which, though commoner far, is so miserably
behind the godlike art of speech: Si ipsam audivisses!
These ink scratches, which in the imperfection of language
we have called words till the unthinking actually dream they
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CHARLES READE
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are words, but which are the shadows of the corpses of words,
these word-shadows then were living powers on her lips, and
subdued, as eloquence always does, every heart within reach of
the imperial tongue.
The young loved her: and the old man, softened and van-
quished, and mindful of his failing life, was silent, and pressed
his handkerchief to his eyes a moment; then he said:
-
-
"No, Bracy-no. Be composed, I pray you. She is right.
Young people, forgive me that I love the dead too well, and
the days when I was what you are now. Drat the woman," con-
tinued he, half ashamed of his emotion: "she makes us laugh
and makes us cry, just as she used. "
"What does he say, young woman? " said the old lady dryly,
to Mrs. Clive.
"He says you make us laugh, and make us cry, madam; and
so you do me, I'm sure. "
"And that's Peg Woffington's notion of an actress! Better
it, Cibber and Bracegirdle, if you can," said the other, rising up
like lightning.
She then threw Colley Cibber a note, and walked coolly and
rapidly out of the room, without looking once behind her.
The rest stood transfixed, looking at one another and at the
empty chair. Then Cibber opened and read the note aloud. It
was from Mrs.
