No More Learning

ON A STRUMPET WHO STOLE HIS TABLETS.

Come, Hendecasyllabics, many as may
All hither, every one that of you be!
That fulsome harlot makes me laughing-stock
And she refuses at our prayer restore
Our stolen Note-books, an such slights ye bear. 5
Let us pursue her clamouring our demands.
"Who's she? " ye question: yonder one ye sight
Mincingly pacing mime-like, perfect pest,
With jaws wide grinning like a Gallic pup.
Stand all round her dunning with demands, 10
"Return (O rotten whore! ) our noting books.
Our noting books (O rotten whore! ) return! "
No doit thou car'st? O Mire! O Stuff o' stews!
Or if aught fouler filthier dirt there be.
Yet must we never think these words suffice. 15
But if naught else avail, at least a blush
Forth of that bitch-like brazen brow we'll squeeze.
Cry all together in a higher key
"Restore (O rotten whore! ) our noting books,
Our noting books (O rotten whore! ) restore! " 20
Still naught avails us, nothing is she moved.
Now must our measures and our modes be changed
An we would anywise our cause advance.
"Restore (chaste, honest Maid! ) our noting books! "

Hither, all ye hendecasyllables, as many as may be, from every part, all of
ye, as many soever as there be! A shameless prostitute deems me fair sport,
and denies return to me of our writing tablets, if ye are able to endure
this. Let's after her, and claim them back. "Who may she be," ye ask? That
one, whom ye see strutting awkwardly, stagily, and stiffly, and with a
laugh on her mouth like a Gallic whelp. Throng round her, and claim them
back. "O putrid punk, hand back our writing tablets; hand back, O putrid
punk, our writing tablets. " Not a jot dost heed? O Muck, Brothel-Spawn, or
e'en loathsomer if it is possible so to be! Yet think not yet that this is
enough. For if naught else we can extort a blush on thy brazened bitch's
face. We'll yell again in heightened tones, "O putrid punk, hand back our
writing tablets, hand back, O putrid punk, our writing tablets. " But naught
we profit, naught she budges. Changed must your measure and your manner be,
an you would further progress make--"O Virgin pure and spotless, hand back
our writing tablets. "

XXXXIII.

Salve, nec minimo puella naso
Nec bello pede nec nigris ocellis
Nec longis digitis nec ore sicco
Nec sane nimis elegante lingua,
Decoctoris amica Formiani. 5
Ten provincia narrat esse bellam?
Tecum Lesbia nostra conparatur?
O saeclum insapiens et infacetum!

XXXXIII.

TO MAMURRA'S MISTRESS.

Hail, girl who neither nose of minim size
Owns, nor a pretty foot, nor jetty eyes,
Nor thin long fingers, nor mouth dry of slaver
Nor yet too graceful tongue of pleasant flavour,
Leman to Formian that rake-a-hell. 5
What, can the Province boast of thee as belle?
Thee with my Lesbia durst it make compare?
O Age insipid, of all humour bare!

Hail, O maiden with nose not of the tiniest, with foot lacking shape and
eyes lacking darkness, with fingers scant of length, and mouth not dry and
tongue scant enough of elegance, _chere amie_ of Formianus the wildling.
And thee the province declares to be lovely? With thee our Lesbia is to be
compared? O generation witless and unmannerly!

XXXXIIII.

O funde noster seu Sabine seu Tiburs,
(Nam te esse Tiburtem autumant, quibus non est
Cordi Catullum laedere: at quibus cordist,
Quovis Sabinum pignore esse contendunt)
Sed seu Sabine sive verius Tiburs, 5
Fui libenter in tua suburbana
Villa malamque pectore expuli tussim,
Non inmerenti quam mihi meus venter,
Dum sumptuosas adpeto, dedit, cenas.
Nam, Sestianus dum volo esse conviva, 10
Orationem in Antium petitorem
Plenam veneni et pestilentiae legi.
Hic me gravido frigida et frequens tussis
Quassavit usque dum in tuum sinum fugi
Et me recuravi otioque et urtica. 15
Quare refectus maximas tibi grates
Ago, meum quod non es ulta peccatum.
Nec deprecor iam, si nefaria scripta
Sesti recepso, quin gravidinem et tussim
Non mi, sed ipsi Sestio ferat frigus, 20
Qui tum vocat me, cum malum librum legi.

XXXXIIII.

CATULLUS TO HIS OWN FARM.

O Farm our own, Sabine or Tiburtine,
(For style thee "Tiburs" who have not at heart
To hurt Catullus, whereas all that have
Wage any wager thou be Sabine classed)
But whether Sabine or of Tiburs truer 5
To thy suburban Cottage fared I fain
And fro' my bronchials drave that cursed cough
Which not unmerited on me my maw,
A-seeking sumptuous banquetings, bestowed.
For I requesting to be Sestius' guest 10
Read against claimant Antius a speech,
Full-filled with poisonous pestilential trash.
Hence a grave frigid rheum and frequent cough
Shook me till fled I to thy bosom, where
Repose and nettle-broth healed all my ills. 15
Wherefore recruited now best thanks I give
To thee for nowise punishing my sins:
Nor do I now object if noisome writs
Of Sestius hear I, but that cold and cough
And rheum may plague, not me, but Sestius' self 20
Who asks me only his ill writs to read.

O, Homestead of ours, whether Sabine or Tiburtine (for that thou'rt
Tiburtine folk concur, in whose heart 'tis not to wound Catullus; but those
in whose heart 'tis, will wager anything thou'rt Sabine) but whether Sabine
or more truly Tiburtine, o'erjoyed was I to be within thy rural
country-home, and to cast off an ill cough from my chest, which--not
unearned--my belly granted me, for grasping after sumptuous feeds. For, in
my wish to be Sestius' guest, his defence against the plaintiff Antius,
crammed with venom and pestilent dulness, did I read through. Hence a chill
heavy rheum and fitful cough shattered me continually until I fled to thine
asylum, and brought me back to health with rest and nettle-broth.
Wherefore, re-manned, I give thee utmost thanks, that thou hast not avenged
my fault. Nor do I pray now for aught but that, should I re-take Sestius'
nefarious script, its frigid vapidness may bring a cold and cough to
Sestius' self; for he but invites me when I read dull stuff.

XXXXV.

Acmen Septumius suos amores
Tenens in gremio 'mea' inquit 'Acme,
Ni te perdite amo atque amare porro
Omnes sum adsidue paratus annos
Quantum qui pote plurimum perire, 5
Solus in Libya Indiave tosta
Caesio veniam obvius leoni. '
Hoc ut dixit, Amor, sinistra ut ante,
Dextra sternuit adprobationem.
At Acme leviter caput reflectens 10
Et dulcis pueri ebrios ocellos
Illo purpureo ore saviata
'Sic' inquit 'mea vita Septumille,
Huic uni domino usque serviamus,
Vt multo mihi maior acriorque 15
Ignis mollibus ardet in medullis. '
Hoc ut dixit, Amor, sinistra ut ante,
Dextra sternuit adprobationem.
Nunc ab auspicio bono profecti
Mutuis animis amant amantur. 20
Vnam Septumius misellus Acmen
Mavolt quam Syrias Britanniasque:
Vno in Septumio fidelis Acme
Facit delicias libidinesque.
Quis ullos homines beatiores 25
Vidit, quis Venerem auspicatiorem?

XXXXV.

ON ACME AND SEPTUMIUS.

To Acme quoth Septumius who his fere
Held on his bosom--"Acme, mine! next year,
Unless I love thee fondlier than before,
And with each twelve month love thee more and more,
As much as lover's life can slay with yearning, 5
Alone in Lybia, or Hind's clime a-burning,
Be mine to encounter Lion grisly-eyed! "
While he was speaking Love on leftward side
(As wont) approving sneeze from dextral sped.
But Acme backwards gently bending head, 10
And the love-drunken eyes of her sweet boy
Kissing with yonder rosy mouth, "My joy,"
She murmured, "my life-love Septumillus mine!
Unto one master's hest let's aye incline,
As burns with fuller and with fiercer fire 15
In my soft marrow set, this love-desire! "
While she was speaking, Love from leftward side
(As wont) with sneeze approving rightwards hied.
Now with boon omens wafted on their way,
In mutual fondness, love and loved are they. 20
Love-sick Septumius holds one Acme's love,
Of Syrias or either Britains high above,
Acme to one Septumius full of faith
Her love and love-liesse surrendereth.
Who e'er saw mortals happier than these two? 25
Who e'er a better omened Venus knew?

Septumius clasping Acme his adored to his bosom, "Acme mine," quoth he, "if
thee I love not to perdition, nor am prepared to love through all the
future years moreover without cease, as greatly and distractedly as man
may,--alone in Libya or in torrid India may I oppose a steel-eyed lion. " As
thus he said, Love, leftwards as before, with approbation rightwards
sneezed. Then Acme slightly bending back her head, and the swimming eyes of
her sweet boy with rose-red lips a-kissing, "So," quoth she, "my life,
Septumillus, this Lord unique let us serve for aye, as more forceful in me
burns the fire greater and keener 'midst my soft marrow. " As thus she said,
Love, leftwards as before, with approbation rightwards sneezed. Now with
good auspice urged along, with mutual minds they love and are beloved. The
thrall o' love Septumius his only Acme far would choose, than Tyrian or
Britannian realms: the faithful Acme with Septumius unique doth work her
love delights and wantonings. Whoe'er has seen folk blissfuller, whoe'er a
more propitious union?

XXXXVI.

Iam ver egelidos refert tepores,
Iam caeli furor aequinoctialis
Iocundis Zephyri silescit aureis.
Linquantur Phrygii, Catulle, campi
Nicaeaeque ager uber aestuosae: 5
Ad claras Asiae volemus urbes.
Iam mens praetrepidans avet vagari,
Iam laeti studio pedes vigescunt.
O dulces comitum valete coetus,
Longe quos simul a domo profectos 10
Diversae variae viae reportant.

XXXXVI.

HIS ADIEUX TO BITHYNIA.

Now Spring his cooly mildness brings us back,
Now th' equinoctial heaven's rage and wrack
Hushes at hest of Zephyr's bonny breeze.
Far left (Catullus! ) be the Phrygian leas
And summery Nicaea's fertile downs: 5
Fly we to Asia's fame-illumined towns.
Now lust my fluttering thoughts for wayfare long,
Now my glad eager feet grow steady, strong.
O fare ye well, my comrades, pleasant throng,
Ye who together far from homesteads flying, 10
By many various ways come homewards hieing.

Now springtide brings back its mild and tepid airs, now the heaven's fury
equinoctial is calmed by Zephyr's benign breath. The Phrygian meadows are
left behind, O Catullus, and the teeming fields of sun-scorched Nicaea: to
the glorious Asian cities let us haste. Now my palpitating soul craves
wander, now my feet grow vigorous with glad zeal. O charming circlet of
comrades, fare ye well, who are together met from distant homes to which
divers sundered ways lead back.

XXXXVII.

Porci et Socration, duae sinistrae
Pisonis, scabies famesque mundi
Vos Veraniolo meo et Fabullo
Verpus praeposuit Priapus ille?
Vos convivia lauta sumptuose 5
De die facitis? mei sodales
Quaerunt in trivio vocationes?

XXXXVII.

TO PORCIUS AND SOCRATION.

Porcius and Socration, pair sinister
Of Piso, scabs and starvelings of the world,
You to Fabullus and my Verianolus,
Hath dared yon snipt Priapus to prefer?
Upon rich banquets sumptuously spread 5
Still gorge you daily while my comrades must
Go seek invitals where the three roads fork?

Porcius and Socration, twins in rascality of Piso, scurf and famisht of the
earth, you before my Veraniolus and Fabullus has that prepuce-lacking
Priapus placed? Shall you betimes each day in luxurious opulence banquet?
And must my cronies quest for dinner invitations, [lounging] where the
three cross-roads meet?

XXXXVIII.

Mellitos oculos tuos, Iuventi,
Siquis me sinat usque basiare,
Vsque ad milia basiem trecenta,
Nec umquam videar satur futurus,
Non si densior aridis aristis 5
Sit nostrae seges osculationis.

XXXXVIII.

TO JUVENTIUS.

Those honied eyes of thine (Juventius! )
If any suffer me sans stint to buss,
I'd kiss of kisses hundred thousands three,
Nor ever deem I'd reach satiety,
Not albe denser than dried wheat-ears show 5
The kissing harvests our embraces grow.

Thine honey-sweet eyes, O Juventius, had I the leave to kiss for aye, for
aye I'd kiss e'en to three hundred thousand kisses, nor ever should I reach
to future plenity, not even if thicker than dried wheat sheaves be the
harvest of our kisses.

XXXXVIIII.

Disertissime Romuli nepotum,
Quot sunt quotque fuere, Marce Tulli,
Quotque post aliis erunt in annis,
Gratias tibi maximas Catullus
Agit pessimus omnium poeta, 5
Tanto pessimus omnium poeta
Quanto tu optimus omnium patronus.

XXXXVIIII.

TO MARCUS TULLIUS CICERO.

Most eloquent 'mid race of Romulus
That is or ever was (Marc Tullius! )
Or in the coming years the light shall see,
His thanks, the warmest, offers unto thee
Catullus, poet sorriest that be, 5
And by such measure poet sorriest,
As thou of pleaders art the bestest best.

Most eloquent of Romulus' descendancy, who are, who have been, O Marcus
Tullius, and who shall later be in after time, to thee doth give his
greatest gratitude Catullus, pettiest of all the poets,--and so much
pettiest of all the poets as thou art peerless 'mongst all pleaders.

L.

Hesterno, Licini, die otiosi
Multum lusimus in meis tabellis,
Vt convenerat esse delicatos.
Scribens versiculos uterque nostrum
Ludebat numero modo hoc modo illoc, 5
Reddens mutua per iocum atque vinum.
Atque illinc abii tuo lepore
Incensus, Licini, facetiisque,
Vt nec me miserum cibus iuvaret,
Nec somnus tegeret quiete ocellos, 10
Sed toto indomitus furore lecto
Versarer cupiens videre lucem,
Vt tecum loquerer, simulque ut essem.
At defessa labore membra postquam
Semimortua lectulo iacebant, 15
Hoc, iocunde, tibi poema feci,
Ex quo perspiceres meum dolorem.
Nunc audax cave sis, precesque nostras,
Oramus, cave despuas, ocelle,
Ne poenas Nemesis reposcat a te. 20
Est vemens dea: laedere hanc caveto.

L.

TO HIS FRIEND LICINIUS.

Idly (Licinius! ) we our yesterday,
Played with my tablets much as pleased us play,
In mode becoming souls of dainty strain.
Inditing verses either of us twain
Now in one measure then in other line 5
We rang the changes amid wit and wine.
Then fared I homewards by thy fun so fired
And by thy jests (Licinius! ) so inspired,
Nor food my hapless appetite availed
Nor sleep in quiet rest my eyelids veiled, 10
But o'er the bedstead wild in furious plight
I tossed a-longing to behold the light,
So I might talk wi' thee, and be wi' thee.
But when these wearied limbs from labour free
Were on my couchlet strewn half-dead to lie, 15
For thee (sweet wag! ) this poem for thee wrote I,
Whereby thou mete and weet my cark and care.
Now be not over-bold, nor this our prayer
Outspit thou (apple of mine eyes! ): we pray
Lest doom thee Nemesis hard pain repay:-- 20
She's a dire Goddess, 'ware thou cross her way.

Yestreen, Licinius, in restful day, much mirthful verse we flashed upon my
tablets, as became us, men of fancy. Each jotting versicles in turn sported
first in this metre then in that, exchanging mutual epigrams 'midst jokes
and wine. But I departed thence, afire, Licinius, with thy wit and
drolleries, so that food was useless to my wretched self; nor could sleep
close mine eyes in quiet, but all o'er the bed in restless fury did I toss,
longing to behold daylight that with thee I might speak, and again we might
be together. But afterwards, when my limbs, weakened by my restless
labours, lay stretched in semi-death upon the bed, this poem, O jocund one,
I made for thee, from which thou mayst perceive my dolour. Now 'ware thee
of presumptuousness, and our pleadings 'ware thee of rejecting, we pray
thee, eye-babe of ours, lest Nemesis exact her dues from thee. She is a
forceful Goddess; 'ware her wrath.

LI.

Ille mi par esse deo videtur,
Ille, si fas est, superare divos,
Qui sedens adversus identidem te
Spectat et audit
Dulce ridentem, misero quod omnis 5
Eripit sensus mihi: nam simul te,
Lesbia, aspexi, nihil est super mi
* * * *
Lingua sed torpet, tenuis sub artus
Flamma demanat, sonitu suopte 10
Tintinant aures geminae, teguntur
Lumina nocte.

LIb.

Otium, Catulle, tibi molestumst:
Otio exultas nimiumque gestis. 15
Otium et reges prius et beatas
Perdidit urbes.

LI.

TO LESBIA.

Peer of a God meseemeth he,
Nay passing Gods (and that can be! )
Who all the while sits facing thee
Sees thee and hears
Thy low sweet laughs which (ah me! ) daze 5
Mine every sense, and as I gaze
Upon thee (Lesbia! ) o'er me strays
* * * *
My tongue is dulled, my limbs adown
Flows subtle flame; with sound its own 10
Rings either ear, and o'er are strown
Mine eyes with night.

LIb.

Ease has thy lot, Catullus, crost,
Ease gladdens thee at heaviest cost, 15
Ease killed the Kings ere this and lost
The tallest towns.

He to me to be peer to a god doth seem, he, if such were lawful, to
o'er-top the gods, who sitting oft a-front of thee doth gaze on thee, and
doth listen to thine laughter lovely, which doth snatch away from sombre me
mine every sense: for instant falls my glance on thee, Lesbia, naught is
left to me [of voice], but my tongue is numbed, a keen-edged flame spreads
through my limbs, with sound self-caused my twin ears sing, and mine eyes
are enwrapped with night.

Sloth, O Catullus, to thee is hurtful: in sloth beyond measure dost thou
exult and pass thy life. Sloth hath erewhile ruined rulers and gladsome
cities.

LII.

Quid est, Catulle? quid moraris emori?
Sella in curuli struma Nonius sedet,
Per consulatum peierat Vatinius:
Quid est, Catulle? quid moraris emori?

LII.

CATULLUS TO HIMSELF.

What is't, Catullus? Why delay to out die?
That Wen hight Nonius sits in curule chair,
For Consulship Vatinius false doth swear;
What is't, Catullus? Why delay to out die?

Prithee Catullus, why delay thine death? Nonius the tumour is seated in the
curule chair, Vatinius forswears himself for consul's rank: prithee
Catullus, why delay thine death?

LIII.

Risi nescioquem modo e corona,
Qui, cum mirifice Vatiniana
Meus crimina Calvos explicasset,
Admirans ait haec manusque tollens,
'Di magni, salaputium disertum! ' 5

LIII.

A JEST CONCERNING CALVUS.

I laughed at one 'mid Forum-crowd unknown
Who, when Vatinius' crimes in wondrous way
Had by my Calvus been explained, exposed,
His hand upraising high admiring cried
"Great Gods! the loquent little Doodle-diddle! " 5

I laughed at I know not whom in the crowded court who, when with admirable
art Vatinius' crimes my Calvus had set forth, with hands uplifted and
admiring mien thus quoth "Great Gods, the fluent little Larydoodle! "

LIIII.

Othonis caput oppidost pusillum
* * * *
Neri rustica semilauta crura,
Subtile et leve peditum Libonis.
* * * *
Si non omnia displicere vellem
Tibi et Fuficio seni recocte 5

LIIIIb.
Irascere iterum meis iambis
Inmerentibus, unice imperator.

LIIII.

TO JULIUS CAESAR. (? )

The head of Otho, puniest of pates
* * * *
The rustic half-washt shanks of Nerius
And Libo's subtle silent fizzling-farts.
* * * *
I wish that leastwise these should breed disgust
In thee and old Fuficius, rogue twice-cookt. 5

LIIIIb.

Again at these mine innocent iamb-lines
Wi' wrath be wrothest; unique Emperor!

Otho's head is paltry past all phrase * * * the uncouth semi-soaped shanks
of Nerius, the slender soundless fizzlings of Libo * * * if not all things
I wish would displease thee and Fuficius, the white-headed and
green-tailed.

Anew thou shalt be enraged at my harmless iambics, emperor unique.

LV.

Oramus, si forte non molestumst,
Demostres, ubi sint tuae tenebrae.
Te campo quaesivimus minore,
Te in circo, te in omnibus libellis,
Te in templo summi Iovis sacrato. 5
In Magni simul ambulatione
Femellas omnes, amice, prendi,
Quas vultu vidi tamen serenas.
A, vel te sic ipse flagitabam,
'Camerium mihi, pessimae puellae. ' 10
Quaedam inquit, nudum sinum reducens,
'En heic in roseis latet papillis. '
Sed te iam ferre Herculei labos est. 13
Non custos si fingar ille Cretum, 23
Non si Pegaseo ferar volatu,
Non Ladas ego pinnipesve Perseus, 25
Non Rhesi nivea citaque biga:
Adde huc plumipedes volatilesque,
Ventorumque simul require cursum:
Quos cunctos, Cameri, mihi dicares,
Defessus tamen omnibus medullis 30
Et multis langoribus peresus
Essem te mihi, amice, quaeritando. 32
Tanto ten fastu negas, amice? 14
Dic nobis ubi sis futurus, ede
Audacter, conmitte, crede lucei.
Num te lacteolae tenent puellae?
Si linguam clauso tenes in ore,
Fructus proicies amoris omnes:
Verbosa gaudet Venus loquella. 20
Vel si vis, licet obseres palatum,
Dum vostri sim particeps amoris.

LV.

OF HIS FRIEND CAMERIUS.

We pray, an' haply irk it not when prayed,
Show us where shadowed hidest thou in shade!
Thee throughout Campus Minor sought we all,
Thee in the Circus, thee in each bookstall,
Thee in Almighty Jove's fane consecrate. 5
Nor less in promenade titled from The Great
(Friend! ) I accosted each and every quean,
But mostly madams showing mien serene,
For thee I pestered all with many pleas--
"Give me Camerius, wanton baggages! " 10
Till answered certain one a-baring breasts
"Lo, 'twixt these rosy paps he haply rests! "
But now to find thee were Herculean feat. 13
Not if I feigned me that guard of Crete, 23
Not if with Pegasean wing I sped,
Or Ladas I or Perseus plumiped, 25
Or Rhesus borne in swifty car snow-white:
Add the twain foot-bewing'd and fast of flight,
And of the cursive winds require the blow:
All these (Camerius! ) couldst on me bestow.
Tho' were I wearied to each marrow bone 30
And by many o' languors clean forgone
Yet I to seek thee (friend! ) would still assay. 32
In such proud lodging (friend) wouldst self denay? 14
Tell us where haply dwell'st thou, speak outright,
Be bold and risk it, trusting truth to light,
Say do these milk-white girls thy steps detain?
If aye in tight-sealed lips thy tongue remain,
All Amor's fruitage thou shalt cast away:
Verbose is Venus, loving verbal play! 20
But, an it please thee, padlockt palate bear,
So in your friendship I have partner-share.

We beg, if maybe 'tis not untoward, thou'lt shew us where may be thine
haunt sequestered. Thee did we quest within the Lesser Fields, thee in the
Circus, thee in every bookshop, thee in holy fane of highmost Jove. In
promenade yclept "The Great," the crowd of cocottes straightway did I stop,
O friend, accosting those whose looks I noted were unruffled. And for thee
loudly did I clamour, "Restore to me Camerius, most giddy girls. " Quoth
such-an-one, her bosom bare a-shewing, "Look! 'twixt rose-red paps he
shelters him. " But labour 'tis of Hercules thee now to find. Not were I
framed the Cretan guard, nor did I move with Pegasean wing, nor were I
Ladas, or Persius with the flying foot, or Rhesus with swift and snowy
team: to these add thou the feathery-footed and winged ones, ask likewise
fleetness of the winds: which all united, O Camerius, couldst thou me
grant, yet exhausted in mine every marrow and with many a faintness
consumed should I be in my quest for thee, O friend. Why withdraw thyself
in so much pride, O friend? Tell us where thou wilt be found, declare it
boldly, give up the secret, trust it to the light. What, do the milk-white
maidens hold thee? If thou dost hold thy tongue closed up in mouth, thou
squanderest Love's every fruit: for Venus joys in many-worded babblings.
Yet if thou wishest, thou mayst bar thy palate, if I may be a sharer in thy
love.

LVI.

Orem ridiculam, Cato, et iocosam
Dignamque auribus et tuo cachinno.
Ride, quidquid amas, Cato, Catullum:
Res est ridicula et nimis iocosa.
Deprendi modo pupulum puellae 5
Trusantem: hunc ego, si placet Dionae,
Protelo rigida mea cecidi.

LVI.

TO CATO, DESCRIBING A "BLACK JOKER. "

O risible matter (Cato! ) and jocose,
Digne of thy hearing, of thy sneering digne.
Laugh (Cato! ) an thou love Catullus thine;
The thing is risible, nay, too jocose.
Erstwhile I came upon a lad who a lass 5
Was ---- and (so please it Dion! ) I
Pierced him with stiffest staff and did him die.

O thing ridiculous, Cato, and facetious, and worthy of thine ears and of
thy laughter. Laugh, Cato, the more thou lovest Catullus: the thing is
ridiculous, and beyond measure facetious. Just now I caught a boy
a-thrusting in a girl: and on him (so please you, Dione) with rigid spear
of mine I fell.

LVII.

Pulcre convenit inprobis cinaedis,
Mamurrae pathicoque Caesarique.
Nec mirum: maculae pares utrisque,
Vrbana altera et illa Formiana,
Inpressae resident nec eluentur: 5
Morbosi pariter, gemelli utrique
Vno in lectulo, erudituli ambo,
Non hic quam ille magis vorax adulter,
Rivales sociei puellularum.
Pulcre convenit inprobis cinaedis. 10

LVII.

ON MAMURRA AND JULIUS CAESAR.

Right well are paired these Cinaedes sans shame
Mamurra and Caesar, both of pathic fame.
No wonder! Both are fouled with foulest blight,
One urban being, Formian t'other wight,
And deeply printed with indelible stain: 5
Morbose is either, and the twin-like twain
Share single Couchlet; peers in shallow lore,
Nor this nor that for lechery hungers more,
As rival wenchers who the maidens claim
Right well are paired these Cinaedes sans shame. 10

A comely couple of shameless catamites, Mamurra and Caesar, pathics both.
Nor needs amaze: they share like stains--this, Urban, the other,
Formian,--which stay deep-marked nor can they be got rid of. Both morbidly
diseased through pathic vice, the pair of twins lie in one bed, alike in
erudition, one not more than other the greater greedier adulterer, allied
rivals of the girls. A comely couple of shameless catamites.

LVIII.

Caeli, Lesbia nostra, Lesbia illa,
Illa Lesbia, quam Catullus unam
Plus quam se atque suos amavit omnes,
Nunc in quadriviis et angiportis
Glubit magnanimos Remi nepotes. 5

LVIII.

ON LESBIA WHO ENDED BADLY.

Caelius! That Lesbia of ours, that Lesbia,
That only Lesbia by Catullus loved,
Than self, far fondlier, than all his friends,
She now where four roads fork, and wind the wynds
Husks the high-minded scions Remus-sprung. 5

O Caelius, our Lesbia, that Lesbia, the self-same Lesbia whom Catullus more
than himself and all his own did worship, now at cross-roads and in alleys
husks off the mettlesome descendants of Remus.

LVIIII.

Bononiensis Rufa Rufulum fellat,
Vxor Meneni, saepe quam in sepulcretis
Vidistis ipso rapere de rogo cenam,
Cum devolutum ex igne prosequens panem
Ab semiraso tunderetur ustore. 5

LVIIII.

ON RUFA.

Rufa the Bolognese drains Rufule dry,
(Wife to Menenius) she 'mid tombs you'll spy,
The same a-snatching supper from the pyre
Following the bread-loaves rolling forth the fire
Till frapped by half-shaved body-burner's ire. 5

Rufa of Bononia lends her lips to Rufulus, she the wife of Menenius, whom
oft among the sepulchres ye have seen clutching her meal from the funeral
pile, when pursuing the bread which has rolled from the fire, whilst she
was being buffeted by a semi-shorn corpse-burner.

LX.

Num te leaena montibus Libystinis
Aut Scylla latrans infima inguinum parte
Tam mente dura procreavit ac taetra,
Vt supplicis vocem in novissimo casu
Contemptam haberes a! nimis fero corde? 5

LX.

TO A CRUEL CHARMER.

Bare thee some lioness wild in Lybian wold?
Or Scylla barking from low'st inguinal fold?
With so black spirit, of so dure a mould,
E'en voice of suppliant must thou disregard
In latest circumstance ah, heart o'er hard? 5

Did a lioness of the Libyan Hills, or Scylla yelping from her lowmost
groin, thee procreate, with mind so hard and horrid, that thou hast
contempt upon a suppliant's voice in calamity's newest stress? O heart
o'ergreatly cruel.

LXI.

Collis o Heliconii
Cultor, Vraniae genus,
Qui rapis teneram ad virum
Virginem, o Hymenaee Hymen,
O Hymen Hymenaee, 5

Cinge tempora floribus
Suave olentis amaraci,
Flammeum cape, laetus huc
Huc veni niveo gerens
Luteum pede soccum, 10

Excitusque hilari die
Nuptialia concinens
Voce carmina tinnula
Pelle humum pedibus, manu
Pineam quate taedam. 15

Namque Vinia Manlio,
Qualis Idalium colens
Venit ad Phrygium Venus
Iudicem, bona cum bona
Nubet alite virgo, 20

Floridis velut enitens
Myrtus Asia ramulis,
Quos Hamadryades deae
Ludicrum sibi rosido
Nutriunt umore. 25

Quare age huc aditum ferens
Perge linquere Thespiae
Rupis Aonios specus,
Nympha quos super inrigat
Frigerans Aganippe, 30

Ac domum dominam voca
Coniugis cupidam novi,
Mentem amore revinciens,
Vt tenax hedera huc et huc
Arborem inplicat errans. 35

Vosque item simul, integrae
Virgines, quibus advenit
Par dies, agite in modum
Dicite 'o Hymenaee Hymen,
O Hymen Hymenaee,' 40

Vt lubentius, audiens
Se citarier ad suom
Munus, huc aditum ferat
Dux bonae Veneris, boni
Coniugator amoris. 45

Quis deus magis anxiis
Est petendus amantibus?
Quem colent homines magis
Caelitum? o Hymenaee Hymen,
O Hymen Hymenaee. 50

Te suis tremulus parens
Invocat, tibi virgines
Zonula soluunt sinus,
Te timens cupida novos
Captat aure maritus. 55

Tu fero iuveni in manus
Floridam ipse puellulam
Dedis a gremio suae
Matris, o Hymenaee Hymen,
O Hymen Hymenaee. 60

Nil potest sine te Venus,
Fama quod bona conprobet,
Commodi capere: at potest
Te volente. quis huic deo
Conpararier ausit? 65

Nulla quit sine te domus
Liberos dare, nec parens
Stirpe cingier: at potest
Te volente. quis huic deo
Conpararier ausit? 70

Quae tuis careat sacris,
Non queat dare praesides
Terra finibus: at queat
Te volente. quis huic deo
Conpararier ausit? 75

Claustra pandite ianuae,
Virgo ades. viden ut faces
Splendidas quatiunt comas?
Tardet ingenuos pudor:
* * * *

* * * *
* * * *
* * * *
Quem tamen magis audiens 80
Flet, quod ire necesse est. 81

Flere desine. non tibi, A- (86)
runculeia, periculumst,
Nequa femina pulchrior
Clarum ab Oceano diem 85
Viderit venientem. (90)

Talis in vario solet
Divitis domini hortulo
Stare flos hyacinthinus.
Sed moraris, abit dies: 90
_Prodeas, nova nupta. _

Prodeas, nova nupta, si
Iam videtur, et audias
Nostra verba. vide ut faces
Aureas quatiunt comas: 95
Prodeas, nova nupta.

Non tuos levis in mala
Deditus vir adultera
Probra turpia persequens
A tuis teneris volet 100
Secubare papillis,

Lenta quin velut adsitas
Vitis inplicat arbores,
Inplicabitur in tuom
Conplexum. sed abit dies: 105
Prodeas, nova nupta.

O cubile, quod omnibus
* * * *
* * * *
* * * * 110
Candido pede lecti,

Quae tuo veniunt ero,
Quanta gaudia, quae vaga
Nocte, quae medio die
Gaudeat! sed abit dies: 115
Prodeas, nova nupta.

Tollite, o pueri, faces:
Flammeum video venire.
Ite, concinite in modum
'O Hymen Hymenaee io, 120
O Hymen Hymenaee. '

Ne diu taceat procax
Fescennina iocatio,
Nec nuces pueris neget
Desertum domini audiens 125
Concubinus amorem.

Da nuces pueris, iners
Concubine: satis diu
Lusisti nucibus: lubet
Iam servire Talasio. 130
Concubine, nuces da.

Sordebant tibi vilicae,
Concubine, hodie atque heri:
Nunc tuom cinerarius
Tondet os. miser a miser 135
Concubine, nuces da.

Diceris male te a tuis
Vnguentate glabris marite
Abstinere: sed abstine.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 140
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Scimus haec tibi quae licent
Sola cognita: sed marito
Ista non eadem licent.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 145
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Nupta, tu quoque, quae tuos
Vir petet, cave ne neges,
Ni petitum aliunde eat.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 150
O Hymen Hymenaee.

En tibi domus ut potens
Et beata viri tui,
Quae tibi sine fine erit
(O Hymen Hymenaee io, 155
O Hymen Hymenaee),

Vsque dum tremulum movens
Cana tempus anilitas
Omnia omnibus adnuit.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 160
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Transfer omine cum bono
Limen aureolos pedes,
Rasilemque subi forem.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 165
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Aspice, intus ut accubans
Vir tuos Tyrio in toro
Totus inmineat tibi.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 170
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Illi non minus ac tibi
Pectore uritur intimo
Flamma, sed penite magis.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 175
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Mitte brachiolum teres,
Praetextate, puellulae:
Iam cubile adeat viri.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 180
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Vos bonae senibus viris
Cognitae bene feminae,
Collocate puellulam.
O Hymen Hymenaee io, 185
O Hymen Hymenaee.

Iam licet venias, marite:
Vxor in thalamo tibist
Ore floridulo nitens,
Alba parthenice velut 190
Luteumve papaver.

At, marite, (ita me iuvent
Caelites) nihilo minus
Pulcher es, neque te Venus
Neglegit. sed abit dies: 195
Perge, ne remorare.

Non diu remoratus es,
Iam venis. bona te Venus
Iuverit, quoniam palam
Quod cupis capis et bonum 200
Non abscondis amorem.

Ille pulveris Africei
Siderumque micantium
Subducat numerum prius,
Qui vostri numerare volt 205
Multa milia ludei.

Ludite ut lubet, et brevi
Liberos date. non decet
Tam vetus sine liberis
Nomen esse, sed indidem 210
Semper ingenerari.

Torquatus volo parvolus
Matris e gremio suae
Porrigens teneras manus
Dulce rideat ad patrem 215
Semhiante labello.

Sit suo similis patri
Manlio et facile inscieis
Noscitetur ab omnibus
Et pudicitiam suae 220
Matris indicet ore.

Talis illius a bona
Matre laus genus adprobet,
Qualis unica ab optima
Matre Telemacho manet 225
Fama Penelopeo.

Claudite ostia, virgines:
Lusimus satis. at, bonei
Coniuges, bene vivite et
Munere adsiduo valentem 230
Exercete inventam.

LXI.

EPITHALAMIUM ON VINIA AND MANLIUS.

1.

Of Helicon-hill, O Thou that be
Haunter, Urania's progeny,
Who hurriest soft virginity
To man, O Hymenaeus Hymen,
O Hymen Hymenaeus. 5

2.

About thy temples bind the bloom,
Of Marjoram flow'ret scented sweet;
Take flamey veil: glad hither come
Come hither borne by snow-hue'd feet
Wearing the saffron'd sock. 10

3.

And, roused by day of joyful cheer,
Carolling nuptial lays and chaunts
With voice as silver-ringing clear,
Beat ground with feet, while brandisht flaunts
Thy hand the piney torch. 15

4.

For Vinia comes by Manlius woo'd,
As Venus on th' Idalian crest,
Before the Phrygian judge she stood
And now with blessed omens blest,
The maid is here to wed. 20

5.

A maiden shining bright of blee,
As Myrtle branchlet Asia bred,
Which Hamadryad deity
As toy for joyance aye befed
With humour of the dew. 25

6.

Then hither come thou, hieing lief,
Awhile to leave th' Aonian cave,
Where 'neath the rocky Thespian cliff
Nymph Aganippe loves to lave
In cooly waves outpoured. 30

7.

And call the house-bride, homewards bring
Maid yearning for new married fere,
Her mind with fondness manacling,
As the tough ivy here and there
Errant the tree enwinds. 35

8.

And likewise ye, clean virginal
Maidens, to whom shall haps befall
Like day, in measure join ye all
Singing, O Hymenaeus Hymen,
O Hymen Hymenaeus. 40

9.

That with more will-full will a-hearing
The call to office due, he would
Turn footsteps hither, here appearing,
Guide to good Venus, and the good
Lover conjoining strait. 45

10.

What God than other Godheads more
Must love-sick wights for aid implore?
Whose Godhead foremost shall adore
Mankind? O Hymenaeus Hymen,
O Hymen Hymenaeus. 50

11.

Thee for his own the trembling sire
Invokes, thee Virgins ever sue
Who laps of zone to loose aspire,
And thee the bashful bridegrooms woo
With ears that long to hear. 55

12.

Thou to the hand of love-fierce swain
Deliverest maiden fair and fain,
From mother's fondling bosom ta'en
Perforce, O Hymen? us Hymen
O Hymen Hymenaeus. 60

13.

Thou lacking, Venus ne'er avails--
While Fame approves for honesty--
Love-joys to lavish: ne'er she fails
Thou willing:--with such Deity
Whoe'er shall dare compare?