No More Learning

As much as they, and with no good cause, wishes ill to me
the ignorant Sorbonne. Very ignorant she shows herself in being
the enemy of the noble trilingual academy [Collège de France)
your Majesty has created. It is clearly manifest that within her
precincts, against your Majesty's will is prohibited all teaching
of Hebrew or Greek or Latin, she declaring it heretical. O poor
creatures, all denuded of learning, you make true the familiar
proverb, “Knowledge has no such haters as the ignorant. ”
They have given me the name of Lutheran. I answer them
that it is not so. Luther for me has not descended from
heaven. Luther for my sins has not hung upon the cross; and
I am quite sure that in his name I have not been baptized: I
have been baptized in that Name at whose naming the Eternal
Father gives that which is asked for, the sole Name in and by
which this wicked world can find salvation.
O Lord God
grant that whilst I live, my pen may
be employed in thy honor; and if this my body be predestined
by thee one day to be destroyed by fire, grant that it be for no
light cause, but for thee and for thy Word. And I pray thee,
Father, that the torture may not be so intense that my soul may
be sunk in forgetfulness of thee, in whom is all iny trust.
(


## p. 9737 (#145) ###########################################

9737
FREDERICK MARRYAT
(1792-1848)
Hough it is nearly half a century since Captain Frederick
Marryat passed away, he still lives in his sea stories. The
circulating-library copies are dog's-eared with constant use,
and an occasional new edition testifies to the favor of a younger gen-
eration. His most ardent admirers, however, do not rank him among
the great novelists. He had no theories of fiction; he had little cult-
ure, and of philosophy or psychology he did not dream. But there
is life, energy, directness in his tales, coupled with lively narrative
and spontaneous humor which keep them
fresh and interesting. He is a born story-
teller; and the talent of the story-teller
commands attention and enchains an audi-
ence, whatever the defects of manner.
Marryat was descended from a Huguenot
family that fled from France at the end of
the sixteenth century and settled in Eng-
land. On his mother's side he was of a
German stock, transplanted to Boston, and
there etherealized, perhaps, by east winds
and Yankee cultivation. He boasted indeed
of the blood of four different peoples. He
was the second son of Joseph Marryat of FREDERICK MARRYAT
Wimbledon, Member of Parliament for Sand-
wich, and was born in London. Educated at private schools, he
was noted from his early boyhood for his boisterous and refractory
though not unamiable temper, which often involved him in passion-
ate quarrels with his teachers, and resulted in his running away.
After he had run away repeatedly, and always with the intention of
going to sea, his father, yielding to his determined bent, got him
at the age of fourteen on board the frigate Impérieuse as midship-
His ship was engaged as part of the squadron which supported
the Catalonians against the French. His service there was active
and brilliant: he took part in some fifty engagements, in one of
which he was severely wounded and left for dead. His pugnacity
saved him; for the contemptuous kick of a fellow midshipman, whom
he hated, roused a fury in him that overcame his speechless and

man.


## p. 9738 (#146) ###########################################

9738
FREDERICK MARRYAT
a
apparently lifeless condition. The work of his division was cutting
out privateers, storming batteries, and destroying marine signal tele-
graph stations. Long afterwards he portrayed the daring and judg-
ment of his commander, Lord Cochrane, in the characters of Captain
Savage in Peter Simple, and Captain M- in 'The King's Own.
Marryat was man of a personal daring as reckless as that
of his favorite heroes. Again and again he risked his life to save
drowning men or to protect his superiors. More than once he re-
ceived the medal of the Humane Society, and King Louis Philippe
decorated him with the cross of the Legion of Honor. A life of
great exposure, constant danger, and severe exertion ruined his health;
and before he was forty he resolved to leave the sea and devote
himself to story-writing. He took many of his characters and inci-
dents from real life, copying them closely in the main, but exagger-
ating and coloring them to meet the purposes of fiction. While not
without imagination, he depended so greatly on his observation and
experience that many of his novels may be said to be almost auto-
biographic. To this fact they owe much of their naturalness, vivid-
ness, and verisimilitude. His ample fund of rough humor and his
extraordinary fondness for spinning yarns.
- a characteristic which
belongs to the nautical temperament -contributed their best quali-
ties to his books; giving them not only the hue and quality, but
the very sound and odor of the sea. One of his old shipmates, who
lived hale and hearty to be an octogenarian, used to say that to read
Midshipman Easy) or (Jacob Faithful' was exactly like spending
half a day in the Captain's company in his best mood. There is
very little art in his thirty-five or forty volumes. They are the nar-
ratives of a bluff, bold, thorough-going, somewhat coarse sailor, who
has a strong dramatic sense and an intense relish for fun. Hardly
any of his novels have what deserves to be called a plot, - the King's
Own' and one or two others, perhaps, being exceptions,— nor are
they generally finished, or even carefully studied. Frequently they
read like half-considered, uncorrected manuscripts that have been dic-
tated. The principal events are graphically recorded, the minor cir-
cumstances and their connections loosely woven. But with all their
defects, the stories seem to the ordinary reader more as if they
had actually happened than as if they had been invented. They are
entirely realistic, -- the characters being perfectly vitalized, ar ting,
breathing human beings.
Among Marryat's best known novels, besides those already men-
tioned, are Adventures of a Naval Officer; or, Frank Mildmay,' his
first work, published at twenty-eight; Newton Forster,) (The Pacha of
Many Tales, (The Pirate and the Three Cutters, Japhet in Search
of a Father,' (Peter Simple,' Percival Keene,' (Snarley-Yow,' 'The


## p. 9739 (#147) ###########################################

FREDERICK MARRYAT
9739
>
Phantom Ship, Poor Jack,' and (The Privateersman One Hundred
Years Ago,' all of which had a large sale. He served in the Medi-
terranean, in the East and West Indies, and off the coast of North
America; participating during the war of 1812 in a gunboat fight on
Lake Pontchartrain, just before the battle of New Orleans. In the
same year he was made lieutenant, and after a few inonths com-
mander. At twenty-seven he married a daughter of Sir Stephen
Shairp, and became the father of eleven children. In 1837 he visited
this country; and two years later published A Diary in America,' in
which he ridiculed the republic, -as Mrs. Trollope had done in her
(Domestic Manners,' as Dickens is still believed (by those who have
not read the book) to have done not long after in his American
Notes,' and as he did most viciously in 'Martin Chuzzlewit' to revenge
himself for the uproar over the American Notes. Americans of the
present generation are so much less sensitive than their predecessors,
however, that they are perhaps more inclined to ask whether these
adverse criticisms were not well founded than to resent their severity.
After this journey he produced divers miscellaneous books; among
which Masterman Ready' and 'The Settlers in Canada' delighted
the boys of two generations, and are still popular. Masterman
Ready' was primarily written because his children wished him to
write a sequel to the Swiss Family Robinson,' which was structur-
ally not feasible; but was also designed to ridicule that priggish
story, and was meant as a protest of naturalness against artificiality.
Fortunate indeed is the owner of an early illustrated edition of Mas-
terman,' portraying that excellent father of a family, Mr. Seagrave,
walking about his fortuitous island, turning over turtles, building
stockades, or gathering cocoanuts, attired in a swallow-tailed coat,
voluminous cravat, trousers severely strapped down under high-heeled
boots, and a tall silk hat which he seemed never to remove.
In his later life Marryat retired to Norfolk, and undertook amateur
farming, with the usual result of heavy losses. He died in 1848 at
Langham; comparatively poor, through carelessness, mismanagement,
and extravagance, although for many years he had earned a large
income. In England Peter Simple and Mr. Midshipman Easy
take rank with Smollett's Peregrine Pickle' and 'Roderick Random. '
Not a few of his characters are as individual and as often cited as
(Tom Bowling' and Jack Hatchway. And if he is somewhat out of
fashion in manner, it is still probable that his naturalness, his racy
dialogue, and his comical incidents, will make him a welcome com-
panion for years to come.
(


## p. 9740 (#148) ###########################################

9740
FREDERICK MARRYAT
PERILS OF THE SEA
From Peter Simple)
W
E CONTINUED our cruise along the coast until we had run
down into the Bay of Arcason, where we captured two or
three vessels and obliged many more to run on shore.
And here we had an instance showing how very important it is
that a captain of a man-of-war should be a good sailor, and have
his ship in such discipline as to be strictly obeyed by his ship's
company. I heard the officers unanimously assert, after the dan-
ger was over, that nothing but the presence of mind which was
shown by Captain Savage could have saved the ship and her
crew. We had chased a convoy of vessels to the bottom of the
bay: the wind was very fresh when we hauled off, after running
them on shore; and the surf on the beach even at that time was
so great, that they were certain to go to pieces before they could
be got afloat again. We were obliged to double-reef the topsails
as soon as we hauled to the wind, and the weather looked very
threatening In an hour afterwards the whole sky was covered
with one black cloud, which sank so low as nearly to touch our
mast-heads; and a tremendous sea, which appeared to have risen
up almost by magic, rolled in upon us, setting the vessel on
dead lee shore. As the night closed in, it blew a dreadful gale,
and the ship was nearly buried with the press of canvas which
she was obliged to carry: for had we sea-room, we should have
been lying-to under storm staysails; but we were forced to carry
on at all risks, that we might claw off shore. The sea broke
over us as we lay in the trough, deluging us with water from
the forecastle aft to the binnacles; and very often, as the ship
descended with a plunge, it was with such force that I really
thought she would divide in half with the violence of the shock.
Double breechings were rove on the guns, and they were further
secured with tackles; and strong cleats nailed behind the trun-
nions; for we heeled over so much when we lurched, that the
guns were wholly supported by the breechings and tackles, and
had one of them broken loose it must have burst right through
the lee side of the ship, and she must have foundered. The cap-
tain, first lieutenant, and most of the officers remained on deck
during the whole of the night: and really, what with the howling
of the wind, the violence of the rain, the washing of the water
a


## p. 9741 (#149) ###########################################

FREDERICK MARRYAT
9741
(
about the decks, the working of the chain pumps, and the creak-
ing and groaning of the timbers, I thought that we must inevi-
tably have been lost; and I said my prayers at least a dozen times
during the night, for I felt it impossible to go to bed. I had
often wished, out of curiosity, that I might be in a gale of wind;
but I little thought it was to have been a scene of this descrip-
tion, or anything half so dreadful. What made it more appalling
was, that we were on a lee shore; and the consultations of the
captain and officers, and the eagerness with which they looked
out for daylight, told us that we had other dangers to encounter
besides the storm. At last the morning broke, and the lookout
man upon the gangway called out, “Land on the lee beam! ” I
perceived the master dash his feet against the hammock rails as
if with vexation, and walk away without saying a word, and look-
ing very grave.
«Up there, Mr. Wilson,” said the captain to the second lieu-
tenant, «and see how far the land trends forward, and whether
you can distinguish the point. ” The second lieutenant went up
the main rigging, and pointed with his hand to about two points
before the beam.
"Do you see two hillocks inland ? »
“Yes, sir,” replied the second lieutenant.
« Then it is so," observed the captain to the master; "and if
we weather it we shall have more sea-room. Keep her full, and
let her go through the water: do you hear, quartermaster ? ”
"Ay, ay, sir. ”
“Thus, and no nearer, my man. Ease her with a spoke or
two when she sends; but be careful, or she'll take the wheel out
of your hands. ”
It really was a very awful sight. When the ship was in the
trough of the sea, you could distinguish nothing but a waste of
tumultuous water; but when she was borne up on the summit of
the enormous waves, you then looked down, as it were, upon a
low, sandy coast, close to you, and covered with foam and break-
ers. «She behaves nobly,” observed the captain, stepping aft to
the binnacle and looking at the compass: “if the wind does not
baffle us, we shall weather. ” The captain had scarcely time to
make the observation when the sails shivered and flapped like thun-
der. “Up with the helm: what are you about, quartermaster ? ”
« The wind has headed us, sir,” replied the quartermaster
,
coolly.


## p. 9742 (#150) ###########################################

9742
FREDERICK MARRYAT
)
The captain and master remained at the binnacle watching the
compass; and when the sails were again full, she had broken off
two points, and the point of land was only a little on the lee bow.
“We must wear her round, Mr. Falcon. Hands, wear ship-
ready, oh, ready. ”
"She has come up again,” cried the master, who was at the
binnacle.
“ Hold fast there a minute. How's her head now ? »
"N. N. E. , as she was before she broke off, sir. ”
“Pipe belay,” said the captain. “Falcon,” continued he, if
she breaks off again we may have no room to wear; indeed
there is so little room now that I must run the risk. Which
cable was ranged last night — the best bower ? »
"Yes, sir. ”
“Jump down, then, and see it double-bitted and stoppered at
thirty fathoms. See it well done -- our lives may depend upon
((
it. »
were
The ship continued to hold her course good; and we
within half a mile of the point, and fully expected to weather it,
when again the wet and heavy sails flapped in the wind, and the
ship broke off two points as before. The officers and seamen
were aghast, for the ship's head was right on to the breakers.
"Luff now, all you can, quartermaster,” cried the captain.
" Send the men aft directly. — My lads, there is no room for
words — I am going to club-haul the ship, for there is no time to
wear. The only chance you have of safety is to be cool, watch
my eye, and execute my orders with precision. Away to your
stations for tacking ship. Hands by the best bower anchor. Mr.
Wilson, attend below with the carpenter and his mates ready to
cut away the cable at the moment that I give the order. Silence,
there, fore and aft. Quartermaster, keep her full again for stays.
Mind you, ease the helm down when I tell you. ” About a min-
ute passed before the captain gave any further orders. The ship
had closed-to within a quarter of a mile of the beach, and the
waves curled and topped around us, bearing us down upon the
shore, which presented one continued surface of foam, extending
to within half a cable's length of our position, at which distance
the enormous waves culminated and fell with the report of
thunder. The captain waved his hand in silence to the quarter-
master at the wheel, and the helm was put down.
The ship
turned slowly to the wind, pitching and chopping as the sails
>


## p. 9743 (#151) ###########################################

FREDERICK MARRYAT
9743
an
even
were spilling. When she had lost her way, the captain gave the
order, “Let go the anchor. We will haul all at once, Mr. Fal-
con,” said the captain. Not a word was spoken; the men went
to the fore-brace, which had not been manned; most of them
knew, although I did not, that if the ship's head did not go
round the other way, we should be on shore and among the
breakers in half a minute. I thought at the time that the cap-
tain had said that he would haul all the yards at once: there
appeared to be doubt or dissent on the countenance of Mr. Fal-
con, and I was afterwards told that he had not agreed with the
captain; but he was too good an officer (and knew that there was
no time for discussion) to make any remark: and the event proved
that the captain was right. At last the ship was head to wind,
and the captain gave the signal. The yards flew round with such
a creaking noise that I thought the masts had gone over the
side; and the next moment the wind had caught the sails, and
the ship, which for a moment or two had been on
keel, careened over to her gunnel with its force. The captain,
who stood upon the weather hammock-rails, holding by the main-
rigging, ordered the helm amidships, looked full at the sails and
then at the cable, which grew broad upon the weather bow and
held the ship from nearing the shore. At last he cried, "Cut
away the cable ! »
A few strokes of the axes were heard, and
then the cable flew out of the hawse-hole in a blaze of fire, from
the violence of the friction, and disappeared under a huge wave
which struck us on the chess-tree and deluged us with water
fore and aft. But we were now on the other tack, and the ship
regained her way, and we had evidently increased our distance
from the land.
«My lads,” said the captain to the ship's company, "you
have behaved well, and I thank you; but I must tell you hon-
estly that we have more difficulties to get through. We have
to weather a point of the bay on this tack. Mr. Falcon, splice
the mainbrace and call the watch. How's her head, quarter-
master? ”
"S. W. by S. Southerly, sir. ”
“Very well, let her go through the water;” and the captain,
beckoning to the master to follow him, went down into the cabin.
As our immediate danger was over, I went down into the berth
to see if I could get anything for breakfast, where I found
O'Brien and two or three more.
(C
(


## p. 9744 (#152) ###########################################

9744
FREDERICK MARRYAT
C
(
((
the compass
“ By the powers, it was as nate a thing as ever I saw done,”
observed O'Brien: "the slightest mistake as to time or manage-
ment, and at this moment the flatfish would have been dubbing
at our ugly carcasses. Peter, you're not fond of flatfish, are you,
my boy? We may thank heaven and the captain, I can tell
you that, my lads; but now where's the chart, Robinson ? Hand
me down the parallel rules and compasses, Peter; they are in
the corner of the shelf. Here we are now, a devilish sight too
near this infernal point. Who knows how her head is ? »
"I do, O'Brien: I heard the quartermaster tell the captain
S. W. by S. Southerly. ”
“Let me see, continued O'Brien, variation 27- leeway -
rather too large an allowance of that, I'm afraid: but however,
we'll give her 24 points; the Diomede would blush to make any
more, under any circumstances. Here
now we'll
see; » and O'Brien advanced the parallel rule from the compass
to the spot where the ship was placed on the chart. « Bother!
you see it's as much as she'll do to weather the other point now,
on this tack, and that's what the captain meant when he told us
we had more difficulty. I could have taken my Bible oath that
we were clear of everything, if the wind held. ”
«See what the distance is, O'Brien,” said Robinson.
It was
measured, and proved to be thirteen miles. "Only thirteen miles;
and if we do weather, we shall do very well, for the bay is deep
beyond. It's a rocky point, you see, just by way of variety.
Well, my lads, I've a piece of comfort for you, anyhow. It's not
long that you'll be kept in suspense; for by one o'clock this day,
you'll either be congratulating each other upon your good luck
or you'll be past praying for. Come, put up the chart, for I hate
to look at melancholy prospects; and steward, see what you can
find in the way of comfort. ” Some bread and cheese, with the
remains of yesterday's boiled pork, were put on the table, with a
bottle of rum, procured at the time they spliced the main brace);
but we were all too anxious to eat much, and one by one returned
on deck, to see how the weather was, and if the wind at all
favored us. On deck the superior officers were in conversation
with the captain, who had expressed the same fear that O'Brien
had in our berth. The men, who knew what they had to expect,-
for this sort of intelligence is soon communicated through a
ship,- were assembled in knots, looking very grave, but at the
same time not wanting in confidence. They knew that they could
>


## p. 9745 (#153) ###########################################

FREDERICK MARRYÁT
9745
C
»
trust to the captain, as far as skill or courage could avail them;
and sailors are too sanguine to despair, even at the last moment.
As for myself, I felt such admiration for the captain, after what
I had witnessed that morning, that whenever the idea came over
me that in all probability I should be lost in a few hours, I could
not help acknowledging how much more serious it was that such
a man should be lost to his country. I do not intend to say that
it consoled me; but it certainly made me still more regret the
chances with which we were threatened.
Before twelve o'clock the rocky point which we so much
dreaded was in sight, broad on the lee bow; and if the low sandy
coast appeared terrible, how much more did this, even at a dis-
tance! the black masses of rock covered with foam, which each
minute dashed up in the air higher than our lower mast-heads.
The captain eyed it for some minutes in silence, as if in calcula-
tion.
"Mr. Falcon,” said he at last, "we must put the mainsail on
her. ”
«She never can bear it, sir. ”
“She must bear it,” was the reply. “Send the men aft to the
mainsheet. See that careful men attend the buntlines. ”
The mainsail was set; and the effect of it upon the ship was
tremendous. She careened over so that her lee channels were
under the water; and when pressed by a sea, the lee side of the
quarter-deck and gangway were afloat. She now reminded me
of a goaded and fiery horse, mad with the stimulus applied;
not rising as before, but forcing herself through whole seas, and
dividing the waves, which poured in one continual torrent from
the forecastle down upon the decks below. Four men
secured to the wheel; the sailors were obliged to cling, to pre-
vent being washed away; the ropes were thrown in confusion to
leeward; the shot rolled out of the lockers, and every eye was
fixed aloft, watching the masts, which were expected every mo-
ment to go over the side. A heavy sea struck us on the broad-
side, and it was some moments before the ship appeared to
recover herself; she reeled, trembled, and stopped her way, as if
it had stupefied her. The first lieutenant looked at the captain,
as if to say, “This will not do. ” "It is our only chance,"
answered the captain to the appeal.
That the ship went faster
through the water and held a better wind, was certain; but
just before we arrived at the point, the gale increased in force.
were
(
XVII-610


## p. 9746 (#154) ###########################################

9746
FREDERICK MARRYAT
»
>
"If anything starts, we are lost, sir,” observed the first lieutenant
again.
“I am perfectly aware of it,” replied the captain in a calm
tone; « but as I said before, and you must now be aware, it is
our only chance. The consequence of any carelessness or neglect
in the fitting and securing of the rigging will be felt now; and
this danger, if we escape it, ought to remind us how much we
have to answer for if we neglect our duty. The lives of a whole
ship's company may be sacrificed by the neglect or incompetence
of an officer when in harbor. I will pay you the compliment,
Falcon, to say that I feel convinced that the masts of the ship
are as secure as knowledge and attention can make them. ”
The first lieutenant thanked the captain for his good opinion,
and hoped it would not be the last compliment which he paid
him.
"I hope not too; but a few minutes will decide the point. ”
The ship was now within two cables' lengths of the rocky
point; some few of the men I observed to clasp their hands, but
most of them were silently taking off their jackets and kicking
off their shoes, that they might not lose a chance of escape pro-
vided the ship struck.
« 'Twill be touch and go indeed, Falcon,” observed the captain
(for I had clung to the belaying pins, close to them, for the last
half-hour that the mainsail had been set). “Come aft; you and
I must take the helin. We shall want nerve there, and only
there, now. ”
The captain and first lieutenant went aft and took the fore.
spokes of the wheel; and O'Brien, at a sign made by the cap-
tain, laid hold of the spokes behind them. An old quartermaster
kept his station at the fourth. The roaring of the seas on the
rocks, with the howling of the winds, was dreadful; but the sight
was more dreadful than the noise. For a few moments I shut
my eyes, but anxiety forced me to open them again. As near
as I could judge, we were not twenty yards from the rocks at
the time that the ship passed abreast of them. We were in the
midst of the foam, which boiled around us; and as the ship was
driven nearer to them, and careened with the wave, I thought
that our main yard-arm would have touched the rock; and at
this moment a gust of wind came on which laid the ship on her
beam-ends and checked her progress through the water, while
the accumulated noise was deafening. A few moments more the


## p. 9747 (#155) ###########################################

FREDERICK MARRYAT
9747
ship dragged on; another wave dashed over her and spent itself
upon the rocks, while the spray was dashed back from them and
returned upon the decks. The main rock was within ten yards
of her counter, when another gust of wind laid us on our beam-
ends; the foresail and mainsail split and were blown clean out
of the bolt-ropes — the ship righted, trembling fore and aft.
looked astern; the rocks were to windward on our quarter, and
we were safe. I thought at the time that the ship, relieved of
her courses, and again lifting over the waves, was not a bad
similitude of the relief felt by us all at that moment; and like
her we trembled as we panted with the sudden reaction, and felt
the removal of the intense anxiety which oppressed our breasts.
The captain resigned the helm, and walked aft to look at the
point, which was now broad on the weather quarter. In a min-
ute or two he desired Mr. Falcon to get new sails up and bend
them, and then went below to his cabin. I am sure it was to
thank God for our deliverance; I did most fervently, not only
then, but when I went to my hammock at night. We w
comparatively safe - in a few hours completely so, for, strange
to say, immediately after we had weathered the rocks the gale
abated; and before morning we had a reef out of the topsails.
re now
MRS. EASY HAS HER OWN WAY
From Mr. Midshipman Easy)
T
I"
((
WAS the fourth day after Mrs. Easy's confinement that Mr.
Easy, who was sitting by her bedside in an easy-chair, com-
menced as follows: "I have been thinking, my dear Mrs.
Easy, about the name I shall give this child. ”
Name, Mr. Easy? why, what name should you give it but
your own ?
Not so, my dear,” replied Mr. Easy: "they call all names
proper names, but I think that mine is not. It is the very worst
name in the calendar. ”
Why, what's the matter with it, Mr. Easy ? »
“The matter affects me as well as the boy. Nicodemus is a
long name to write at full length, and Nick is vulgar. Besides,
as there will be two Nicks, they will naturally call my boy Young
Nick, and of course I shall be styled Old Nick, which will be
diabolical. »


## p. 9748 (#156) ###########################################

9748
FREDERICK MARRYAT
>
>>
I will ap-
« Well, Mr. Easy, at all events then let me choose the name. ”
“That you shall, my dear; and it was with this view that I
have mentioned the subject so early. ”
“I think, Mr. Easy, I will call the boy after my poor father:
his name shall be Robert. »
“Very well, my dear: if you wish it, it shall be Robert. You
shall have your own way. But I think, my dear, upon a little
consideration, you will acknowledge that there is a decided
objection. ”
"An objection, Mr. Easy ? ”
“Yes, my dear: Robert máy be very well, but you must
reflect upon the consequences; he is certain to be called Bob. ”
"Well, my dear, and suppose they do call him Bob? »
"I cannot bear even the supposition, my dear. You forget
the county in which you are residing, the downs covered with
sheep. ”
“Why, Mr. Easy, what can sheep have to do with a Christian
name ? »
“There it is: women never look to consequences. My dear,
they have a great deal to do with the name of Bob.
peal to any farmer in the country if ninety-nine shepherds' dogs
out of one hundred are not called Bob. Now observe: your child
is out of doors somewhere in the fields or plantations; you
want and you call him. Instead of your child, what do you find ?
Why, a dozen curs, at least, who come running up to you,
all answering to the name of Bob, and wagging their stumps
of tails. You see, Mrs. Easy, it is a dilemma not to be got
over. You level your only son to the brute creation by giving
him a Christian name which, from its peculiar brevity, has been
monopolized by all the dogs in the county. Any other name
you please, my dear; but in this one instance you must allow me
to lay my positive veto. ”
“Well, then, let me see- but I'll think of it, Mr. Easy: my
head aches very much just now. ”
"I will think for you, my dear. What do you say to John ? "
“Oh no, Mr. Easy,- such a common name! ”
"A proof of its popularity, my dear. It is Scriptural — we
have the Apostle and the Baptist, we have a dozen popes who
were all Johns. It is royal — we have plenty of kings who
were Johns — and moreover, it is short, and sounds honest and
manly. "
(C


## p. 9749 (#157) ###########################################

FREDERICK MARRYAT
9749
(
C
»
I am
>>
(
"Yes, very true, my dear; but they will call him Jack. ”
“Well, we have had several celebrated characters who were
Jacks. There was — let me see - Jack the Giant-Killer, and Jack
- — -
of the Bean-Stalk — and Jack — Jack —
- »
"Jack Sprat. "
"And Jack Cade, Mrs. Easy, the great rebel — and Three-
fingered Jack, Mrs. Easy, the celebrated negro — and above all,
Jack Falstaff, ma'am, Jack Falstaff — honest Jack Falstaff — witty
Jack Falstaff -->>
"I thought, Mr. Easy, that I was to be permitted to choose
the name. ”
“Well, so you shall, my dear; I give it up to you.
Do just
as you please; but depend upon it that John is the right name.
Is it not, now, my dear ? »
"It's the way you always treat me, Mr. Easy: you say that
you give it up, and that I shall have my own way, but I never
do have it.
sure that the child will be christened John.
"Nay, my dear, it shall be just what you please. Now I
recollect it, there were several Greek emperors who were Johns;
but decide for yourself, my dear. ”
"No, no,” replied Mrs. Easy, who was ill, and unable to con-
tend any longer, “I give it up, Mr. Easy. I know how it will
be, as it always is: you give me my own way as people give
pieces of gold to children; it's their own money, but they must
not spend it. Pray call him John. ”
« There, my dear, did not I tell you you would be of my
opinion upon reflection? I knew you would. I have given you
your own way, and you tell me to call him John; so now we're
both of the same mind, and that point is settled. ”
"I should like to go to sleep, Mr. Easy: I feel far from
well. ”
"You shall always do just as you like, my dear," replied
the husband, and have your own way in everything. It is the
greatest pleasure I have when I yield to your wishes. I will
walk in the garden. Good-by, my dear. ”
Mrs. Easy made no reply, and the philosopher quitted the
room. As may easily be imagined, on the following day the boy
was christened John.
(
»


## p. 9750 (#158) ###########################################

9750
MARTIAL
(MARCUS VALERIUS MARTIALIS)
(50 ? -102 ? A. D. )
BY CASKIE HARRISON
M
ARTIAL (Marcus Valerius Martialis), the world's epigrammatist,
was, like Seneca and Quintilian, a Spanish Latin. Born at
Bilbilis about A. D. 40, he probably came to Rome in 63;
but we first individualize him about 79. He lived in Rome for nearly
thirty-five years, publishing epigrams, book after book and edition
after edition, doing hack-work in his own line for those who had the
money to buy but not the wit to produce, and plagiarized by those
who lacked both the wit and the money; reading his last good thing
to his own circle, from which he could
not always exclude poachers on his pre-
serves, and lending a courteous or a politic
patience to the long-winded recitations of
new aspirants; patronized in various more
or less substantial ways by the Emperor
and sundry men of wealth, influence, and
position, on whom he pulled all the strings
of fulsome flattery and importunate appeal;
adjusting himself to the privileges and ex-
pectancies of Rome's miscellaneous “upper
ten” in private and public resorts: solacing
his better nature with the contact and es-
MARTIAL
teem of the best authors of the day. Bored
with the “fuss and feathers” of town life,
and yearning for the lost or imagined happiness of his native place,
he would from time to time fly to his Nomentane cottage or make
trips into the provinces, only to be disenchanted by rustic monotony
and depressed by the lack of urban occupations and diversions. His
works, and his life as there sketched, expose the times and their
representative men at their best and at their worst. This delineation
gives to his writings an importance even greater than that due to
his general pre-eminence as the one poet of his age, or to the special
supremacy of his epigrams as such. His rating as a poet has indeed
been questioned, and his restriction of the epigram deplored; but no



## p. 9751 (#159) ###########################################

MARTIAL
9751
one can question his portraiture of the Roman Empire at the turn of
its troubled tide.
Returning to Spain early in Trajan's reign, he died there about
102; and his death is noted with sincere feeling by the younger
Pliny, whose recognition must to a certain degree offset our repug-
nance to some of Martial's acknowledged characteristics. Martial was
a man of many personal attractions: he was essentially sympathetic
and true, loving nature and children; his manners were genial, and
his education was finished; his acute observation was matched by his
versatile wit; in an age of artifice, his style was as natural as his
disposition was fair and generous. All these qualities are detected
in his works, although his time demanded the general repression or
the prudent display of such qualities by one whose livelihood must
depend on patronage,-an inevitable professionalism that perhaps
fully explains, not only his obsequiousness, but also his obscenity.
Martial was a predestined gentleman and scholar, forced by his pro-
fession into a trimmer and a dependent: a man of stronger character
might have refused to live such a life even at the cost of his vocation
and its aptitudes; but Martial was a man of his own world.
Whether Martial was married, and how many times, it is hard to
determine: he is his only witness, and his testimony is too indirect
to be unquestionable; at any rate, he seems to have had no children.
His pecuniary condition is equally doubtful: he credits himself with
possessions adequate to comfort only as a basis for protestations
of discomfort; but we know how time and circumstances alter one's
standards of worldly contentment. Even when Martial speaks in the
first person, we cannot be sure it is not the “professional,” instead of
the individual, first person,- the vicarious and anonymous first per-
son of the myriad public whose hints he worked up into effective
mottoes, valentines, and lampoons, and for whose holiday gifts he
devised appropriate companion pieces of verse.
Martial's poems — fifteen books, containing about sixteen hundred
numbers in several measures - are epigrams of different kinds. The
Liber Spectaculorum' (The Show Book) merely depicts the marvels
of the “greatest shows on earth,” while eulogizing the generosity of
the emperors who provided them. The Xenia' (“friendly gifts”)
and Apophoreta (“things to take away with you”) are couplets to
label or convoy presents, whose enumeration includes an ventory
of Flavian dietetics, costume, furniture, and bric-à-brac. The other
twelve books are epigrams of the standard type; a kind illustrated
indeed by the Greeks, but developed and fixed by the Romans from
Catullus down, Martial being the perpetual exemplar of its possibilities.
Besides some lapses of taste, whereby the fatal facility of over-
smartness sometimes leads to contaminating tender or lofty sentiments


## p. 9752 (#160) ###########################################

9752
MARTIAL
by untimely pleasantry, Martial is justly condemned by the modern
world for the two blemishes which have been already specified. How
far he really felt his obsequiousness and his obscenity to be compro-
mises of his dignity, and how far his life was cleaner than his page,
we cannot tell: he was a client of Domitian's day, but he had enjoyed
the countenance of Pliny. In justice to Martial's memory, it must be
said that only about one-fifth of his epigrams are really offensive.
The reign of Domitian was a reaction within a reaction, char-
acterized by the power and the impotence of wealth and its cheap
imitations. It was an age of fads and nostrums: sincere, as the
galvanizing of dead philosophies; affected, as the vicarious intellect-
ualism or the vicarious athleticism of hired thinkers and hired glad-
iators. It was an age of forgotten fundamentals, with no enthusiasm
except for practical advantage, with public spirit aped only in mutual
admiration. Its art and literature had no creativeness and no respon-
sibility; form and copy being ideals, and point demanding the highest
season for its pungency, while the stage and the arena were scenes
of filth or brutality. Its religion was either agnostic paganism or
various novel sentimentalities. Its social functions were chiefly het-
erogeneous gatherings of a flotsam and jetsam assemblage of parve-
nus, where acquaintance was accidental and multitudinous isolation
was the rule. The incongruities of the day afforded matchless targets
for our poet's wit, many of them unfortunately not suited to modern
light. Yet other ages of the world have indisputably exhibited in
their own forms one or another of the features familiarized to us
by Martial.
Martial divides with Juvenal the right to represent this period;
but the division is not equal. The serious purpose of the satirist,
even more than the purely impersonal attitude of the historian, leads
him to emphasize unduly circumstances of perhaps great momentary
importance, but of no ultimate or typical pertinence. On the other
hand, the satirist and the historian are apt to neglect or overlook
many aspects of contemporary life because these seem insignificant
as regards any particular aim or tendency; whereas trifles are often
the best exhibits of the actual offhand life, as distinguished from the
professed principles and practice of the time. Hence Martial's epi-
grams have been well called by Merivale “the quintessence of the
Flavian epoch. ” The epigrammatist has no mission to fulfill; and the
form as well as the volume of his works enables him to touch every
aspect of life into the boldest relief. Especially interesting is the
modernness of these touches; and it would startle a stranger to see
how slight an adaptation or perversion of an epigram or a line or a
word produces anticipatory echoes of present-day experiences, in their
extremest or most peculiar features.


## p. 9753 (#161) ###########################################

MARTIAL
9753
Generally speaking, the Romans were humorous after the dry
kind, while the Greeks were witty; but Greek comedy and epigram
are as humorous as those of any nation, and Martial vindicates the
Roman capacity for triumphant wit - a wit that shows all the colors
of all the nationalities. The wit of America, of France, of Ireland,
cross and blend with each other in Martial's epigrams; and even trav-
esties like the American mockery of Hebrew or negro idiosyncra-
sies find illustration. Puns, parodies, paradoxes, refrains, antitheses,
alliterations, echoes and surprises of all sorts are there, with some
curious antetypes of modern slang, of present provincial or proverb-
ial usages, and even of some points of recent comic songs. In the
versions here appended, literalness has been sacrificed to spirit; the
characteristic features of the original have been preserved in a mod-
ern countenance and expression. In the small space at command,
preference has been given to our poet's wit rather than his other
qualities, as being the special characteristic of himself and of the
epigram; though the omission of other specimens is a sacrifice of his
dues.
The only notable edition of Martial is Friedländer's with Ger-
man notes, the school manuals being inadequate and unsympathetic.
There is no great translation, the French renderings in prose and
verse being the best complete reproduction; there are admirable ver-
sions of individual epigrams in all the modern languages. Sellar's
monographs in the Encyclopædia Britannica) and his "Selections
from Martial' give perhaps the best brief estimate of the poet in
our tongue.
Carnie
Harrism.
THE UNKINDEST CUT
L
AST night as we boozed at our wine,
After having three bottles apiece,
You recall that I asked you to dine,
And you've come, you absurdest of geese!
I was maudlin, you should have been mellow,
All thought of the morrow away:
Well, he's but a sorry good fellow
Whose mind's not a blank the next day!


## p. 9754 (#162) ###########################################

9754
MARTIAL
EVOLUTION
A
SURGEON once - a sexton now twin personages:
Identical professions, only different stages!
VALE OF TEARS
LONE she never weeps her father's death;
When friends are by, her tears time every breath.
Who weeps for credit, never grief hath known;
He truly weeps alone, who weeps alone!
A
SIC VOS NON VOBIS
I
F THAT the gods should grant these brothers twain
Such shares of life as Leda's Spartans led,
A noble strife affection would constrain,
For each would long to die in brother's stead;
And he would say who first reached death's confine,
"Live, brother, thine own days, and then live mine! ”
SILENCE IS GOLDEN
OU'RE pretty, I know it; and young, that is true;
And wealthy — there's none but confesses that too:
But you trumpet your praises with so loud a tongue
That you cease to be wealthy or pretty or young!
You
SO NEAR AND YET SO FAR
YES
,
ES, New and I both here reside:
Our stoops you see are side by side;
And people think I'm puffed with pride,
And envy me serenely blessed,
With such a man for host and guest.
The fact is this — he's just as far
As folks in Borrioboola Gha.
What! booze with him ? or see his face,
Or hear his voice? In all the place
There's none so far, there's none so near!
We'll never meet if both stay here!
To keep from knowing New at all,
Just lodge with him across the hall!


## p. 9755 (#163) ###########################################

MARTIAL
9755
THE LEAST OF EVILS
HILE some with kisses Julia smothers,
Reluctant hand she gives to others:
Give me thy merest finger-tips,
Or anything - but not thy lips!
W
THOU REASON’ST WELL
TER
He atheist swears there is no God
And no eternal bliss:
For him to own no world above
Doth make a heaven of this.
NEVER IS, BUT ALWAYS TO BE
<<
Yºu
(
always say
to-morrow, ” “to-morrow” you will live;
But that “to-morrow," prithee, say when will it arrive ?
How far is't off ? Where is it now? Where shall I go to
find it?
In Afric's jungles lies it hid? Do polar icebergs bind it?
It's ever coming, never here; its years beat Nestor's hollow!
This wondrous thing, to call it mine, I'll give my every dollar!
Why, man, to-day's too late to live — the wise is who begun
To live his life with yesterday, e'en with its rising sun!
LEARNING BY DOING
A
s MITHRADATES used to drink the deadly serpent's venom,
That thus all noxious things might have for him no mis-
chief in 'em,-
So Skinner feeds but once a day with scanty preparation,
To teach his folks to smile unfed nor suffer from starvation.
TERTIUM QUID
W**
HEN poets, croaking hoarse with cold,
To spout their verses seek,
They show at once they cannot hold
Their tongues, yet cannot speak.


## p.