Here ha's been that
infinity
of ?
Ben Jonson - The Devil's Association
afe.
FIT. Come Gentlemen, your hands, 35
For witnes.
MAN. VVhat is this?
EVE. You ha' made _Election_
Eueril _applaudes it_.
Of a mo? t worthy _Gentleman_!
MAN. VVould one of worth
Had ? poke it: whence it comes, it is
Rather a ? hame to me, then a prai? e.
EVE. Sir, I will giue you any Satisfaction. 40
MAN. Be ? ilent then: "fal? hood commends not truth".
PLV. You do deliuer this, Sir, as your deed.
To th' v? e of M^r. _Manly_?
FIT. Yes: and Sir--
VVhen did you ? ee yong _Wittipol_? I am ready,
For proce? ? e now; Sir, this is _Publication_. 45
He ? hall heare from me, he would needes be courting
My wife, Sir.
MAN. Yes: So witne? ? eth his Cloake there.
FIT. Nay good Sir,--_Madame_, you did vndertake--
Fitz-dottrel _is ? u? picious of_ Manly _? till_.
VVIT. VVhat?
FIT. That he was not _Wittipols_ friend.
VVIT. I heare S^r. no confe? ? ion of it.
FIT. O ? he know's not; 50
Now I remember, _Madame_! This young _Wittipol_,
VVould ha' debauch'd my wife, and made me _Cuckold_,
Through a ca? ement; he did fly her home
To mine owne window: but I think I ? ou't him,
And rauifh'd her away, out of his pownces. 55
I ha' ? worne to ha' him by the eares: I feare
The toy, wi' not do me right.
VVIT. No? that were pitty!
VVhat right doe you aske, Sir? Here he is will do't you?
Wittipol _di? couers him? elfe_.
FIT. Ha? _Wittipol_?
VVIT. I Sir, no more _Lady_ now,
Nor _Spaniard_!
MAN. No indeed, 'tis _Wittipol_. 60
FIT. Am I the thing I fear'd?
VVIT. A _Cuckold_? No Sir,
But you were late in po? ? ibility,
I'll tell you ? o much.
MAN. But your wife's too vertuous!
VVIT. VVee'll ? ee her Sir, at home, and leaue you here,
To be made _Duke o' Shore-ditch_ with a proiect. [157] 65
FIT. Theeues, raui? hers.
VVIT. Crie but another note, Sir,
I'll marre the tune, o' your pipe!
FIT. Gi' me my deed, then.
_He would haue his_ deed _again_.
VVIT. Neither: that ? hall be kept for your wiues good,
VVho will know, better how to v? e it.
FIT. Ha'
To fea? t you with my land?
VVIT. Sir, be you quiet, 70
Or I ? hall gag you, ere I goe, con? ult
Your Ma? ter of dependances; how to make this
A ? econd bu? ine? ? e, you haue time Sir.
VVitipol _bafflees him, and goes out_.
FIT. Oh!
VVhat will the gho? t of my wi? e Grandfather,
My learned _Father_, with my wor? hipfull _Mother_, 75
Thinke of me now, that left me in this world
In ? tate to be their _Heire_? that am become
A _Cuckold_, and an _A? ? e_, and my wiues Ward;
Likely to loo? e my land; ha' my throat cut:
All, by her practice!
MER. Sir, we are all abus'd! 80
FIT. And be ? o ? till! VVho hinders you, I pray you,
Let me alone, I would enioy my ? elfe,
And be the _Duke o' Drown'd-Land_, you ha' made me.
MER. Sir, we mu? t play an _after-game_ o' this.
FIT. But I am not in ca? e to be a _Gam-? ter_: 85
I tell you once againe--
MER. You mu? t be rul'd
And take some coun? ell.
FIT. Sir, I do hate coun? ell,
As I do hate my wife, my wicked wife!
MER. But we may thinke how to recouer all:
If you will act.
FIT. I will not think; nor act; 90
Nor yet recouer; do not talke to me?
I'll runne out o' my witts, rather then heare;
I will be what I am, _Fabian Fitz-Dottrel_,
Though all the world ? ay nay to't.
MER. Let's follow him.
[712] SD. om. G
[713] 3 granted 1692, f.
[714] 16 SN. om. G
[715] 21 SN. _She_ om. W _She_ . . . ] [_Pointing to Manly. _ G
[716] 22 He's 1716, f.
[717] 30 [_To Plutarchus. _ G || hither 1692, f.
[718] 32 sir? [_Aside to Wit. _ G
[719] 36 SN. om. G
[720] 38 it! but now whence W, G
[721] 39 to] unto W, G
[722] 43 [_To Manly. _ G
[723] 48 SN. om. G
[724] 49 VVIT. _What. _ 1641
[725] 53 Thorow 1692 Thorough 1716, f.
[726] 54 sou't] fou't 1692 fought 1716, W sous'd G
[727] 58 SN. Wittipol om. G
[728] 67 SN. om. G
[729] 69 Ha! 1692, f.
[730] 73 SN. ] [_Baffles him, and exit with Manly. _ G
[731] 82 injoy 1641
[732] 94 to't. [_Exit. _ G || Let's Let us W, G || him. [_Exeunt. _ G
ACT. V. SCENE. I. [158]
AMBLER. PITFALL. MERE-CRAFT.
Bvt ha's my Lady mi? t me?
PIT. Beyond telling!
Here ha's been that infinity of ? trangers!
And then ? he would ha' had you, to ha' ? ampled you
VVith one within, that they are now a teaching;
And do's pretend to your ranck.
AMB. Good fellow _Pit-fall_, 5
Tel M^r. _Mere-craft_, I intreat a word with him.
Pitfall _goes out_.
This most vnlucky accident will goe neare
To be the lo? ? e o' my place; I am in doubt!
MER. VVith me? what ? ay you M^r _Ambler_?
AMB. Sir,
I would be? eech your wor? hip ? tand betweene 10
Me, and my _Ladies_ di? plea? ure, for my ab? ence.
MER. O, is that all? I warrant you.
AMB. I would tell you Sir
But how it happened.
MER. Brief, good Ma? ter _Ambler_,
Put your selfe to your rack: for I haue ta? que
Of more importance.
Mere-craft _? eemes full of bu? ine? ? e_.
AMB. Sir you'll laugh at me? 15
But (? o is _Truth_) a very friend of mine,
Finding by conference with me, that I liu'd
Too cha? t for my complexion (and indeed
Too hone? t for my place, Sir) did adui? e me
If I did loue my ? elfe (as that I do, 20
I mu? t confe? ? e)
MER. Spare your _Parenthe? is_.
AMB. To gi' my body a little euacuation--
MER. Well, and you went to a whore?
AMB. No, S^r. I dur? t not
(For feare it might arriue at ? ome body's eare,
It ? hould not) tru? t my ? elfe to a common hou? e; 25
Ambler _tels this with extraordinary ? peed_.
But got the Gentlewoman to goe with me,
And carry her bedding to a _Conduit-head_,
Hard by the place toward _Tyborne_, which they call
My L. Majors _Banqueting-hou? e_. Now Sir, This morning
Was _Execution_; and I ner'e dream't on't 30
Till I heard the noi? e o' the people, and the hor? es;
And neither I, nor the poore Gentlewoman [159]
Dur? t ? tirre, till all was done and pa? t: ? o that
I' the _Interim_, we fell a ? leepe againe.
_He flags_.
MER. Nay, if you fall, from your gallop, I am gone S^r. 35
AMB. But, when I wak'd, to put on my cloathes, a ? ute,
I made new for the action, it was gone,
And all my money, with my pur? e, my ? eales,
My hard-wax, and my table-bookes, my ? tudies,
And a fine new deui? e, I had to carry 40
My pen, and inke, my ciuet, and my tooth-picks,
All vnder one. But, that which greiu'd me, was
The Gentlewoman's ? hoes (with a paire of ro? es,
And garters, I had giuen her for the bu? ine? ? e)
So as that made vs ? tay, till it was darke. 45
For I was faine to lend her mine, and walke
In a rug, by her, barefoote, to Saint _Giles'es_.
MER. A kind of Iri? h penance! Is this all, Sir?
AMB. To ? atisfie my _Lady_.
MER. I will promi? e you, S^r.
AMB. I ha' told the true _Di? a? ter_.
MER. I cannot ? tay wi' you 50
Sir, to condole; but gratulate your returne.
AMB. An hone? t gentleman, but he's neuer at lei? ure
To be him? elfe: He ha's ? uch tides of bu? ine? ? e.
[733] SD. AMBLER . . . ] _A Room in_ Tailbush's _House.
Enter_ AMBLER _and_ PITFALL. G
[734] 6 entreat W, G || SN. ] [_Exit Pitfall. _ G
[735] 8 _Enter_ MEERCRAFT. G
[736] 12 that] this 1641
[737] 14 a tasque 1641
[738] 15 SN. om. G
[739] 16 () ret. G.
[740] 25 SN. Ambler om. G
[741] 29 Mayor's 1716, f.
[742] 30 never W, G
[743] 34 SN. _slags_ 1641
[744] 43, 4 (with . . . garters,) W || () ret. G
[745] 51, 3 [_Exit. _ G
ACT. V. SCENE. II.
PVG. AMBLER.
O, Call me home againe, deare _Chiefe_, and put me
To yoaking foxes, milking of Hee-goates,
Pounding of water in a morter, lauing
The ? ea dry with a nut-? hell, gathering all
The leaues are falne this _Autumne_, drawing farts 5
Out of dead bodies, making ropes of ? and,
Catching the windes together in a net,
Mu? tring of ants, and numbring atomes; all
That hell, and you thought exqui? ite torments, rather
Then ? tay me here, a thought more: I would ? ooner 10
Keepe fleas within a circle, and be accomptant
A thou? and yeere, which of 'hem and how far
Out leap'd the other, then endure a minute
Such as I haue within. There is no hell
To a _Lady_ of fa? hion. All your torture there 15
Are pa? times to it. 'T would be a refre? hing [160]
For me, to be i' the fire againe, from hence.
Ambler _comes in, & ? uruayes him_.
AMB. This is my ? uite, and tho? e the ? hoes and ro? es!
PVG. Th' haue such impertinent vexations,
A generall Councell o' _diuels_ could not hit-- 20
Pug _perceiues it, and ? tarts_.
Ha! This is hee, I tooke a ? leepe with his _Wench_,
And borrow'd his cloathes. What might I doe to balke him?
AMB. Do you heare, S^r?
PVG. Answ. him but not to th'purpo? e
AMB. What is your name, I pray you Sir.
PVG. Is't ? o late Sir?
_He an? wers quite from the purpo? e. _
AMB. I aske not o' the time, but of your name, Sir. 25
PVG. I thanke you, Sir. Yes it dos hold Sir, certaine.
AMB. Hold, Sir? what holds? I mu? t both hold, and talke to you
About the? e clothes.
FIT. Come Gentlemen, your hands, 35
For witnes.
MAN. VVhat is this?
EVE. You ha' made _Election_
Eueril _applaudes it_.
Of a mo? t worthy _Gentleman_!
MAN. VVould one of worth
Had ? poke it: whence it comes, it is
Rather a ? hame to me, then a prai? e.
EVE. Sir, I will giue you any Satisfaction. 40
MAN. Be ? ilent then: "fal? hood commends not truth".
PLV. You do deliuer this, Sir, as your deed.
To th' v? e of M^r. _Manly_?
FIT. Yes: and Sir--
VVhen did you ? ee yong _Wittipol_? I am ready,
For proce? ? e now; Sir, this is _Publication_. 45
He ? hall heare from me, he would needes be courting
My wife, Sir.
MAN. Yes: So witne? ? eth his Cloake there.
FIT. Nay good Sir,--_Madame_, you did vndertake--
Fitz-dottrel _is ? u? picious of_ Manly _? till_.
VVIT. VVhat?
FIT. That he was not _Wittipols_ friend.
VVIT. I heare S^r. no confe? ? ion of it.
FIT. O ? he know's not; 50
Now I remember, _Madame_! This young _Wittipol_,
VVould ha' debauch'd my wife, and made me _Cuckold_,
Through a ca? ement; he did fly her home
To mine owne window: but I think I ? ou't him,
And rauifh'd her away, out of his pownces. 55
I ha' ? worne to ha' him by the eares: I feare
The toy, wi' not do me right.
VVIT. No? that were pitty!
VVhat right doe you aske, Sir? Here he is will do't you?
Wittipol _di? couers him? elfe_.
FIT. Ha? _Wittipol_?
VVIT. I Sir, no more _Lady_ now,
Nor _Spaniard_!
MAN. No indeed, 'tis _Wittipol_. 60
FIT. Am I the thing I fear'd?
VVIT. A _Cuckold_? No Sir,
But you were late in po? ? ibility,
I'll tell you ? o much.
MAN. But your wife's too vertuous!
VVIT. VVee'll ? ee her Sir, at home, and leaue you here,
To be made _Duke o' Shore-ditch_ with a proiect. [157] 65
FIT. Theeues, raui? hers.
VVIT. Crie but another note, Sir,
I'll marre the tune, o' your pipe!
FIT. Gi' me my deed, then.
_He would haue his_ deed _again_.
VVIT. Neither: that ? hall be kept for your wiues good,
VVho will know, better how to v? e it.
FIT. Ha'
To fea? t you with my land?
VVIT. Sir, be you quiet, 70
Or I ? hall gag you, ere I goe, con? ult
Your Ma? ter of dependances; how to make this
A ? econd bu? ine? ? e, you haue time Sir.
VVitipol _bafflees him, and goes out_.
FIT. Oh!
VVhat will the gho? t of my wi? e Grandfather,
My learned _Father_, with my wor? hipfull _Mother_, 75
Thinke of me now, that left me in this world
In ? tate to be their _Heire_? that am become
A _Cuckold_, and an _A? ? e_, and my wiues Ward;
Likely to loo? e my land; ha' my throat cut:
All, by her practice!
MER. Sir, we are all abus'd! 80
FIT. And be ? o ? till! VVho hinders you, I pray you,
Let me alone, I would enioy my ? elfe,
And be the _Duke o' Drown'd-Land_, you ha' made me.
MER. Sir, we mu? t play an _after-game_ o' this.
FIT. But I am not in ca? e to be a _Gam-? ter_: 85
I tell you once againe--
MER. You mu? t be rul'd
And take some coun? ell.
FIT. Sir, I do hate coun? ell,
As I do hate my wife, my wicked wife!
MER. But we may thinke how to recouer all:
If you will act.
FIT. I will not think; nor act; 90
Nor yet recouer; do not talke to me?
I'll runne out o' my witts, rather then heare;
I will be what I am, _Fabian Fitz-Dottrel_,
Though all the world ? ay nay to't.
MER. Let's follow him.
[712] SD. om. G
[713] 3 granted 1692, f.
[714] 16 SN. om. G
[715] 21 SN. _She_ om. W _She_ . . . ] [_Pointing to Manly. _ G
[716] 22 He's 1716, f.
[717] 30 [_To Plutarchus. _ G || hither 1692, f.
[718] 32 sir? [_Aside to Wit. _ G
[719] 36 SN. om. G
[720] 38 it! but now whence W, G
[721] 39 to] unto W, G
[722] 43 [_To Manly. _ G
[723] 48 SN. om. G
[724] 49 VVIT. _What. _ 1641
[725] 53 Thorow 1692 Thorough 1716, f.
[726] 54 sou't] fou't 1692 fought 1716, W sous'd G
[727] 58 SN. Wittipol om. G
[728] 67 SN. om. G
[729] 69 Ha! 1692, f.
[730] 73 SN. ] [_Baffles him, and exit with Manly. _ G
[731] 82 injoy 1641
[732] 94 to't. [_Exit. _ G || Let's Let us W, G || him. [_Exeunt. _ G
ACT. V. SCENE. I. [158]
AMBLER. PITFALL. MERE-CRAFT.
Bvt ha's my Lady mi? t me?
PIT. Beyond telling!
Here ha's been that infinity of ? trangers!
And then ? he would ha' had you, to ha' ? ampled you
VVith one within, that they are now a teaching;
And do's pretend to your ranck.
AMB. Good fellow _Pit-fall_, 5
Tel M^r. _Mere-craft_, I intreat a word with him.
Pitfall _goes out_.
This most vnlucky accident will goe neare
To be the lo? ? e o' my place; I am in doubt!
MER. VVith me? what ? ay you M^r _Ambler_?
AMB. Sir,
I would be? eech your wor? hip ? tand betweene 10
Me, and my _Ladies_ di? plea? ure, for my ab? ence.
MER. O, is that all? I warrant you.
AMB. I would tell you Sir
But how it happened.
MER. Brief, good Ma? ter _Ambler_,
Put your selfe to your rack: for I haue ta? que
Of more importance.
Mere-craft _? eemes full of bu? ine? ? e_.
AMB. Sir you'll laugh at me? 15
But (? o is _Truth_) a very friend of mine,
Finding by conference with me, that I liu'd
Too cha? t for my complexion (and indeed
Too hone? t for my place, Sir) did adui? e me
If I did loue my ? elfe (as that I do, 20
I mu? t confe? ? e)
MER. Spare your _Parenthe? is_.
AMB. To gi' my body a little euacuation--
MER. Well, and you went to a whore?
AMB. No, S^r. I dur? t not
(For feare it might arriue at ? ome body's eare,
It ? hould not) tru? t my ? elfe to a common hou? e; 25
Ambler _tels this with extraordinary ? peed_.
But got the Gentlewoman to goe with me,
And carry her bedding to a _Conduit-head_,
Hard by the place toward _Tyborne_, which they call
My L. Majors _Banqueting-hou? e_. Now Sir, This morning
Was _Execution_; and I ner'e dream't on't 30
Till I heard the noi? e o' the people, and the hor? es;
And neither I, nor the poore Gentlewoman [159]
Dur? t ? tirre, till all was done and pa? t: ? o that
I' the _Interim_, we fell a ? leepe againe.
_He flags_.
MER. Nay, if you fall, from your gallop, I am gone S^r. 35
AMB. But, when I wak'd, to put on my cloathes, a ? ute,
I made new for the action, it was gone,
And all my money, with my pur? e, my ? eales,
My hard-wax, and my table-bookes, my ? tudies,
And a fine new deui? e, I had to carry 40
My pen, and inke, my ciuet, and my tooth-picks,
All vnder one. But, that which greiu'd me, was
The Gentlewoman's ? hoes (with a paire of ro? es,
And garters, I had giuen her for the bu? ine? ? e)
So as that made vs ? tay, till it was darke. 45
For I was faine to lend her mine, and walke
In a rug, by her, barefoote, to Saint _Giles'es_.
MER. A kind of Iri? h penance! Is this all, Sir?
AMB. To ? atisfie my _Lady_.
MER. I will promi? e you, S^r.
AMB. I ha' told the true _Di? a? ter_.
MER. I cannot ? tay wi' you 50
Sir, to condole; but gratulate your returne.
AMB. An hone? t gentleman, but he's neuer at lei? ure
To be him? elfe: He ha's ? uch tides of bu? ine? ? e.
[733] SD. AMBLER . . . ] _A Room in_ Tailbush's _House.
Enter_ AMBLER _and_ PITFALL. G
[734] 6 entreat W, G || SN. ] [_Exit Pitfall. _ G
[735] 8 _Enter_ MEERCRAFT. G
[736] 12 that] this 1641
[737] 14 a tasque 1641
[738] 15 SN. om. G
[739] 16 () ret. G.
[740] 25 SN. Ambler om. G
[741] 29 Mayor's 1716, f.
[742] 30 never W, G
[743] 34 SN. _slags_ 1641
[744] 43, 4 (with . . . garters,) W || () ret. G
[745] 51, 3 [_Exit. _ G
ACT. V. SCENE. II.
PVG. AMBLER.
O, Call me home againe, deare _Chiefe_, and put me
To yoaking foxes, milking of Hee-goates,
Pounding of water in a morter, lauing
The ? ea dry with a nut-? hell, gathering all
The leaues are falne this _Autumne_, drawing farts 5
Out of dead bodies, making ropes of ? and,
Catching the windes together in a net,
Mu? tring of ants, and numbring atomes; all
That hell, and you thought exqui? ite torments, rather
Then ? tay me here, a thought more: I would ? ooner 10
Keepe fleas within a circle, and be accomptant
A thou? and yeere, which of 'hem and how far
Out leap'd the other, then endure a minute
Such as I haue within. There is no hell
To a _Lady_ of fa? hion. All your torture there 15
Are pa? times to it. 'T would be a refre? hing [160]
For me, to be i' the fire againe, from hence.
Ambler _comes in, & ? uruayes him_.
AMB. This is my ? uite, and tho? e the ? hoes and ro? es!
PVG. Th' haue such impertinent vexations,
A generall Councell o' _diuels_ could not hit-- 20
Pug _perceiues it, and ? tarts_.
Ha! This is hee, I tooke a ? leepe with his _Wench_,
And borrow'd his cloathes. What might I doe to balke him?
AMB. Do you heare, S^r?
PVG. Answ. him but not to th'purpo? e
AMB. What is your name, I pray you Sir.
PVG. Is't ? o late Sir?
_He an? wers quite from the purpo? e. _
AMB. I aske not o' the time, but of your name, Sir. 25
PVG. I thanke you, Sir. Yes it dos hold Sir, certaine.
AMB. Hold, Sir? what holds? I mu? t both hold, and talke to you
About the? e clothes.
